Behind the Camera
by 0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0
Summary: Rose Hathaway is the leading photographer of Spirit Magazine. She loves the camera, but sometimes she is hiding behind to much. With her best friends wedding coming, will Dimitri discover the hidden stories behind the camera of Rose's life or will he realize that he would rather have her behind her camera instead of kidnapped by a lunatic? All human.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone! This is a new story that came to me one night! I really wanted to do a human Rose and Dimitri story soo I did! I really hope that it will be a good idea and it won't mean that I am stopping my other stories, I will be trying to do all of them! I will work on each of them, but for now, please enjoy my new story...Behind the Camera.**

"Turn your head to the right…your other right! Damn, are all models airheads?" I muttered to myself as the blonde, skinny model giggles and turns her head in the _right _direction. "Why did I agree to this job?"

"Because you needed job, we needed a photographer, and you happened to love photography." My assistant, Sydney, retorted. I rolled my eyes at her, before snapping two more photos of the back-to-school fashion model.

"Done, you can go now!" I yelled at her. She paled and scampered off the set, faster than the last girl. She would be back though, they always come back.

"Must you always be so rude to them?" Sydney sighed out, frustrated.

I smirked, "It gets the job done, and it's get me home faster." I replied putting up my camera in its rightful bag, and then slinging its strap over my shoulder. She chuckled, scratching things off on the clipboard that she held. I watched as she sighed and scribbled something onto it.

"Okay, let's go up to your office and transfer the photos over-"

"Why can't we do that tomorrow?" I whined, which she responded by throwing me a hard glare.

"Stop acting like a child Rose." She stated.

"Syd, it's almost ten, and by the time I get home, it will be eleven. Unlike you, I actually get tired when the sun goes down, and sleep." I rub the palms of my hand against my eyes stifling a yawn. We had been up at the studio since ten this morning, only got a lunch break, before starting up again.

She _finally _seemed to establish that because she sighed and put her clipboard in the little black bag hanging on her shoulder. I squealed and hugged her happily. I heard her chuckle in my ear before pulling back uncomfortably.

Sydney wasn't one to hug, or talk to casually. She was all work and no play, and I have seriously tried to break that shell, but I've had no luck so far. Sydney had nice features, such as dark-blonde hair that framed her face, and pretty brown-colored eyes. It was a good combination on her but I have never seen her show them. Her body wasn't as curved as mine, but it was still skinny and fit. She was almost as tall as me, though I wasn't very tall, maybe 5'4?

That was the only similarity though; I had dark, brown hair that almost reaches my butt. I loved my hair, I thought it was my best quality; I never let anyone cut it. My brown eyes completed that along with my skin tone, which was best described as an Arabian princess. I'm not conceded either, but I did know that I had curves in all the right places, and could pull off anything. Boys followed me around all throughout high school, and I even had followers in college. I never let them come near me though; I knew they only had one thing in mind.

"So, since I'm giving you the night off…be here by eight tomorrow." I gaped at my assistant, trying to see the amusement in her words. She was staring straight at me, no humor showing at all.

"What?" I shrieked at her. She smirked at me, before turning around and strutting towards the door across the building.

"No later!" She shouted before the door closed behind her figure. I groaned before grabbing my purse and walking towards the door quickly. The faster I got home, the more sleep I get. I was not a morning person, if I could, I would sleep to twelve every day. I barely made it on time when I get here at ten!

I sifted through my purse so I could locate the keys to my Pontiac G8, while making my way through the empty car park towards the only car still there; my beautiful, red Pontiac.

In seconds, I'm speeding down the road towards my small two-room apartment. Many people ask me why I don't have a house, in sunny California, but why should I? I live alone; it would make me feel lonelier in a big house by myself. There was no reason for that at all. I had already experienced that, since my mom was never home, always away for business, and my dad was sneaking around, interacting, probably illegally, with drug dealers and mobsters like himself.

I had lived alone many times during my child hood years and even learned to fend for myself in my teenage years. I managed to graduate, and after working at many various locations for money, I managed to buy my way into college. It also helped that a hefty amount of money was left in my account, more likely from my father. I didn't want to take the money, but it was the _least _he could do!

I had majored in business, and minored in photography. I only had small jobs for my photography, making enough money for the small apartment that I am still using now. A couple months later, my best friend Lissa, introduced me to her Uncle, Victor Dashkov.

Victor is the owner, and head chief for _Spirit _Magazine_. _He saw some of my work, and offered me the job of lead photographer for his magazine. I was thrilled, overjoyed at the fact that I was working for the leading magazine company in the United States. I accepted the job, and thanked him profoundly. I made more than enough money, but never bought a house, deciding to stay in my small, homey apartment, about an hour away.

_I'm into fashion just because of you it ain't the flash man, it's down to attitude I'm into fashion all because of you I got new fashion just for you_

I recognized the ringer immediately, smiling as I pushing the talk key on my phone. She was already talking before I could say 'hello'.

"OH MY GOSH ROSE! YOU HAVE TO COME OVER HERE IMMEDIATLEY! IT'S AN EMERGENCY!" She screamed into the phone. I panicked and made a few quick turns, exiting the freeway and earning a few honks at me, which in turn made me flip them off.

"Lissa, calm down, what happened?" I asked calmly, though I was freaking out inside. "Are you hurt? Are you bleeding? Did Christian hit you? I swear to god Lissa if he hit you-"

"ROSE! Shut up, I'm fine! Why the hell would you come to the conclusion of Christian hurting me?" She seemed angry and I gulped thinking of the glare that she was probably sending my way. I quickly changed the subject.

"So you're not hurt?" I questioned her. She giggled into the phone, which was all I needed to know that she was fine. "Then what made you call me this late, in the middle of traffic, with very little sleep, and a very agitated stomach?" I questioned her overdramatically.

"Are you coming?" I raced past each street sign, nodding to her. When she didn't reply, I realized that she couldn't see me.

"Yeah Liss," I replied tiredly. "I'm almost a block away."

"I'll see you then," she squealed then hung up the phone. I shook my head at my energetic best friend. Lissa is the best fashion designer in California. Her work is sent all over the country and is shown off in _Spirit Magazine._

We had been friends since college, her majoring in fashion design instead of business. Her first job started stronger than mine, her uncle helping her out a lot. Half a year after college she was already known in a lot of places.

Her boyfriend, Christian was just the mail boy in the company, and one day Lissa happened to bump into him. The day after she told me everything about him and that she was accidently going to bump into him again the next day. Once more, the saw each other and this time she got his number. She waited by the phone every night, or so she told me, and two nights later he called and asked her out.

That had been three years ago. Christian is six foot one, with black hair and crystal blue eyes. We are all 27 years old, Lissa and me still in the stage of _will we ever find someone?_ I still haven't found any body that I wanted to call mine though. Of course I had boyfriends, but I always broke it off with them. I was boyfriend-less right now, gladly, not needing any extra weight at the moment.

I stared up at the two-story house that I parked in front of; familiar with the house as if I lived there, which I practically did most of the time. Sighing, I got out of my car, locking it, and heading towards the front door. Without knocking, I walk right in like I always did.

I take a peek into the living room, before walking towards the kitchen, where I could hear noises coming from.

"I hope you are making me some good food in- Ah come on! You couldn't keep your hands off each other for 5 minutes!" I groan, covering my eyes from their intense make-out session. Christian chuckled, usually sending out a snarky remark, which made me peek through my hands, wondering what put the grins on their face this late.

"Rose!" Lissa squealed running towards me. I smiled and returned the hug that she was giving me instantly.

"Yes I'm here," I tell her, "now what do you need to tell me?" I asked her smiling.

"Well it's more of a question," she replied, biting her bottom lip. My head cocked to the side, confused. "Will you be my maid of honor?" I stared at her in shock, before looking at her left hand and seeing a giant diamond nestling on her ring finger.

"Liss," I whisper to shock to say anything else. "Yes! Of course I will! I can't believe it! You're getting married!" I screamed as we jumped up and down hugging. After we were done, I ran to Christian and threw my arms around him.

"Bout time," I growl in his ear. I could even feel him rolling his eyes at me.

"We're not going to be all huggy huggy now are we?" I chuckled, punching him in the arm.

"Never happened," I remark, winking at him. He smirked back, before grabbing his fiancé in his arms once again. I was happy for them, but I also felt a little pity for myself. I'm still the third wheel in our group…actually; let's make that fifth wheel if I included Eddie and Mia. Wait! Adrian is single too, but he is always flirting with me, while I wave him off and try to ignore him…hmm maybe I could get him and Sydney together, they might make a good match. I just need a way to get Sydney to come out with us one night and-

"Rose? Helloo, anybody home? I think she has finally lost it," I growl at Christian and snap at his hand, which was being waved in front of my eyes. He jumps back and hold his hands up, smirking. "Woah girl, calm down." He cooed as if I was a wild animal. I glare at him and make a move to hit him when Lissa grabs my fists and glares at Christian.

"Stop Chris, now." She states as I smile menacing at him, mouthing a 'later'. He pales slightly, either from getting on Lissa's bad side or from my threat. I like to think of it more as my threat, though he is whipped.

"As we were saying," Lissa exaggerates, "Tasha will be here next Tuesday, along with Chris and Tasha's cousin Dimitri." I grimace at Tasha's name, a black cloud starting to glide over my mood. I hated Tasha, she was Christian's sister and the best way to describe her would be that she was user, as in, she seduces any guy on the street, has sex with them, and then tosses them away like their trash. This guy Dimitri though…I never knew they had a cousin.

"I didn't know you had a cousin," I question looking at Christian, he shrugs half-heartedly.

"He was my mom's nephew, along with my Aunt Olena, my grandmother Yeva, and my other cousins, Karolina, Viktoria, and Sonya. I kind of lost communication with them when my parents died, so never really brought them up. Since the wedding his coming though, and they are the only family I have left, I called them and they said that they would be here two weeks before the wedding. My cousin Dimitri though, wanted to come up here earlier, so he will be coming up with Tasha." Christian replies, shrugging once more, a slight pain in his tone.

Christian's parents died when he was real little, coming home after dark on their anniversary when they were attacked by some gang members wanting money. They were stabbed repeatedly, and drained of money when someone found them and called 9-11. Barely living, they were taken to the hospital, dying from blood loss 5 hours later.

He never really got over their deaths; when Lissa found him that day in the office, she changed his life. His friends said that, before Lissa came into his life, Christian was gloomy and dark. He always stood away from everybody, not having any friends in high school, many scared that he would pull out a knife one day and kill someone, the same way his parents were. He always wore black, and would glare at anyone that passed by.

When Lissa showed up that day, Christian saw an angel, which he called her repeatedly, and said that she shined light on his life every day. Though I would never say anything, Christian and Lissa were perfect for each other.

I can only say that though, because I hated Christian before, never thinking that he was good enough for my best friend, my sister. Months past, and I grew some respect for him, he loved Lissa with his whole heart, so now I think of him as a brother now.

Coming back to the present, I saw Lissa and him exchanging glances. I knew my face was one of disgust upon hearing Tasha's name.

"Rose, we know that you don't know Dimitri, but we won't have enough room here for everyone. Once Tasha and Dimitri get here, my Aunt Tatiana will be here, along with my Uncle Mikhail. Mark and Oksana were going to stay in the hotel, but we are letting them stay here too." I list all of the people in my head. It was going to be a tight squeeze, even with how big this house was. At least one or two people will have to sleep on the floor.

"This means…" I trail, raising both of my eyebrows. They exchange another look, before looking back at me, eyes pleading.

"Can Dimitri stay at your house? We know you have one extra room at your house, and you don't know him, but he is a really nice guy." Christian pleaded, and if it wasn't for the situation, I would have laughed. Christian has never pleaded me for anything.

"How long will he be staying at my house?" I mean, he could be a weirdo that will watch me in my sleep, or a total jerk, despite what they say.

"Well, the wedding is going to the twelfth next month-"

"Why so early?" I questioned, shocked at how fast they were working here. When did they discuss all of this? Didn't he just propose?

"I love her, I don't want to wait long to marry her." Lissa nodded in agreement, and I rubbed my face with both of my hands. I had a huge feeling that I was going to be getting no sleep, and will be late to work, earning at chewing out from Sydney.

"How did you figure all of this out this fast?" I asked tiredly.

"We went to dinner at five, and he proposed then. We spent the rest of dinner making plans and-"

"Making out?" They rolled their eyes, but they didn't deny it. I smirked as Lissa kept talking.

"And then we came back home and I called Aunt Tatiana and Uncle Mikhail, and Chris called his family. We were planning on telling everyone else at dinner Friday, but I couldn't _not _tell you." I smiled at her, kissing her cheek.

"Fine I will let your cousin sleep at my house. Can I go home and sleep now? Sydney will yell at me in the morning if I'm late." I state.

"You're always late, tomorrow isn't going to be any different." Christian replied sneakily. I glared at him, but it wasn't really used at full force, being that I was going to pass out at any minute. Thank god I only had a 10 minute drive from here.

"Shut up sparky," I yawn, tightly grabbing my keys in my right hand, and placing my left over my mouth.

"Hey Rose?" I turn to Lissa and she is smiling softly. "Will you also take the pictures for the invitations? You know, for everyone else at the office, and some of our other friends for college." I walk over and kiss her cheek, hugging her.

"Of course I will," I breathe.

"Thanks Rose, now I'm going to have the best pictures for my children to see." I smirk at Christian over her shoulder, who paled at the mention of children. "I still don't see why you don't show any art dealers your pictures at home. You could make some money off of that, and you could also put them in shows for people to see." I shook my head quickly.

Lissa always tells me that I should show people my pictures that I take away from work, but I will never do that. The pictures that I take away from work are private. It was a hobby of mine, since high school. They just mean a lot to me, and I don't think that people will enjoy it like I do.

"One day I will get you to show others your work." I sigh, and pull away from her. She has only seen a few of my pictures, but only the one that are hung around my house, my more personal one are hidden in my room. No one has seen those, ever.

"Well I'm going now, night." I reply, smiling at them and walking through the door. I turn the car on as I reach it and drive home.

Ten minutes later I pull my car into the driveway of my small white house. The front steps rotten, and in need of repairment. The paint is slowly peeling away, on the side of my hose, and plants are dying slightly in the front.

It wasn't that I didn't have the money; I just didn't have the time. I was working all day, every day, and on the weekends I would go to Lissa's house for whatever fun she was doing. I promised myself that I would clean the house up a bit this weekend.

I carefully walk up the steps and unlock the door, shaking it so that it would turn. I open it and look at the many things lying around. Besides the trash and clothes, I see my camera lying on the coffee table in the room that the house opens up into and my large notebook, resting besides it.

Picking it up, I open it up and stare at the first picture that I always keep there. Smiling, I feel a single tear escape from my eyes and I quickly rub it away, harshly shutting the binder and grabbing my camera. I trudge to my room and place my binder on the shelf, and the camera lightly on my nightstand.

Not caring about changing my clothes, I throw my shoes off and flop down on my bed. _Yes, definitely too personal for everyone else. _I whisper to myself, before closing my eyes, and trying to keep my mind from wondering to the black and white picture of my happy, beloved Aunt.

**I wonder what the picture was...hmm well I know but do you? Please review! More details will be coming in the next chapter, but I will not mention the first picture until further into the story. I know there was barely anything on Dimitri, but that is because Rose doesn't know enough about him to really think about him. Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone,I kind of wanted to get another chapter out to you before school started up again tomorrow, it's not as long as I like, but it's something. In this chapter, someone is coming a little bit earlier then expected, this calls for a very frustrated Rose(; enjoy! And review!**

**Chapter 2**

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

_What the hell? I only got, what, 1 hour of sleep? _I exaggerate, looking at the time. I sighed and hit the clock to stop the annoying beeps that are emitting from it. When silence filled the room I had the strong urge to close my eyes and-

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

I shot up in bed, throwing the stupid clock into the wall across the room. When the crash echoed around the room, I knew that I wouldn't be going back to sleep, I was wide awake.

"Damn, little insolent piece of junk," I mutter standing up and kicking the small device. It made one lone beep before it was silence for good. _Great, now I need a new alarm clock. _

I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and trudged my way towards my bathroom. I quickly showered and blow-dried my hair, before putting it into a sloppy bun and blowing a wisp of hair out of my eyes. I then applied a small amount of eye liner, mascara, and blush to make my eyes a little bigger, remembering what today was.

It has been three days since Lissa told me about the wedding, making today Friday. Lissa was having a get-together tonight with the whole group, planning on telling them of the engagement. Since it was still a weekday, I had work until 5, and then I was going to drive down to the restaurant where Lissa planned on telling everyone.

It was already hectic at Lissa's house, blueprints were set all around the living room, and magazines piled high in the kitchen. There was also her _binder_, the thing that was twice the size of a normal notebook, filled with everything a girl could want for her wedding.

I already hated it. Lissa stuffed it in my face last night, pointing out this and this, highlighting this dress and that dress, and I finally grabbed the damn thing and placed it on a high shelf where she couldn't reach it. I know it was her wedding, but _still!_ I was in the middle of dinner!

I chuckled at the memory of her angry face and grabbed my oversized sweatshirt and faded blue jeans. The sweatshirt was gray and had Mickey Mouse embalmed on the front. The jeans had a rip in the knee and a white paint splatter on the thigh.

They were my favorite. I threw on a pair of sneakers and grabbed my book bag that I had haphazardly thrown by the door, containing my professional camera and all of my papers for work. As I walked to the kitchen I saw a flash of red by my window. I walked towards it and saw a beautiful, red cardinal sitting on the worn out stairs.

I smiled and ran quietly to get my camera. Seconds later I was staring through a new eye, a more digital one. I opened to door, quietly and squatted down, finding the best angle and snapping a shot. Pulling the camera away from my face, I stare at the picture. The cardinal was exactly like the one from my Aunt's house; almost an exact replica bringing color to the dull porch that it rested on. I remember the day that I saw the bird, a week before the accident.

_"Aunt Alberta! Look a red bird!" I shouted, staring at the small animal in front of me. I heard her chuckle from behind me and she wraps an arm around my shoulder._

_"That's a cardinal Rosie," Aunt Alberta whispers beside me. "I heard once before that when you see a red cardinal, it means change is coming, and they are also said to help you pass from life into the spirits, guiding you along. They are strong birds that you shouldn't take lightly, there is always a reasons for seeing them."_

_"What kind of change is coming then?" I ask confused, staring up at her. She looks down at me and smiles. _

_"I don't know Rosie, we will just have to wait and see," she whispers, and I turn my attention back to the cardinal that sits on the windowsill. _

_"There is also one more thing about the red cardinal Rosie," she continues, and my eyebrows scrunch together._

_"What that?" I question._

_"Red cardinals can teach you confidence, and give you strength if you need it. If you believe in them, then you will always be lead back home." I smile and stare at the small bird, that held so much meaning, so much truth._

A week later, change did occur; Aunt Alberta was in a car crash after someone drove into her head-on before she could stop or move out of the way. The day my mom got the call, I knew I saw a small red, cardinal outside my window, and looking straight into my eyes, and I had the feeling that it was my Aunt, looking over me.

Today was the first day since then that I have ever seen a red cardinal again, and I was a little bit scared, remembering what they mean. Hopefully, the change that this one is bringing in a new marriage; something good, not something bad.

I sighed as I wiped a tear off of my face and stood up, just in time for the cardinal to fly away into the early morning sun.

"Bye Aunt Alberta," I whisper into the empty air. I smile once more at the picture, before shutting my camera down and placing it on the counter. I continued what I was doing before everything happened.

I went into the kitchen and grabbed a small breakfast bar, knowing I was running late, and rushed to my car. I shoved the keys into the ignition and started my car, pulling out of the driveway and going to work.

"Come on Rose! For once in your life can you be on time? The guys are already here, ready for the shoot! I know that are late often but 45 minutes is cutting it. Rose, we get our money if we finish the work on time and-"

"Sydney," I bit out angrily. "I know that I am late, will you please give it a rest, just for today, please." I beg, not even glancing at her.

I was still bothered by the meaning of the cardinal this morning, a bit scared at what big change was coming. I barely got through the last change, staying locked up in my room for days after Aunt Alberta died. It was the hardest time in my life, because my Aunt was the women that helped me grow up, she was more of a mom then my _own _mom and I couldn't recover quickly from that. She was my best friend, when I was younger.

As we walked into my shoot in the office, I realized that Sydney had stopped talking to me, and was now analyzing me. I turned to face her, and her face softened, probably seeing the remorse lowing through them.

"You know I am here if you need to talk to me," she whispered. I smile at her and shake my head.

"I'm fine Syd, just a rough morning." I mutter turning and opening my bag to pull out all of the supplies I needed for today's shoot.

She sighed and walked towards all of the guy models that they had brought in today, hunky men, with board shorts and oiled down chest. All ready for the beach pictures that they were to be taking. All of them looked hot, sexy, and mouthwatering to any teenage girl looking at them on the cover.

These were my boys.

"Artur, Lev, Denis! My boys! I haven't seen you in a long time!" I shout and they grin and give me hugs.

"My Rose, you are looking more wonderful by the day. I'm still wondering when you will be getting behind the camera, and show those other models how to do it right." I laugh and shake my head and Lev's antics.

"I'm much better behind the camera, thank you Lev." He grins cheekily before motioning with his head towards the shoot.

"So where do you want us?"

After fixing the boys up in multiple positions, I am finally on my last shot. "Hold it boys, perfect, keep still." _Beeeeep. _"Ah! Whose phone was that! I thought I told all of you that I do not allow phones in my office!" I shout, glaring at every person in the room. They seem confused and looked wearily at one another, trying to figure out which dimwit caused the _boss_ to get mad.

_Yes I'm controlling, but they know that I'm good. _I tell myself, smiling as I think of the reputation I have earned in the past year.

_Beeeep. _"If I hear that ringer go off one more time-"

"_Rose," _Sydney whispered loudly. I turned to her and she was pointing to the pocket of my sweats, where conveniently, my phone was placed, ringing. I slapped my forehead, remembering that I turned my phone down, but the phone was still on beep mode.

"Dam myself, I'm such a hypocrite," I continue cursing at myself as I pull my phone out and flip it open harshly. "Hello?" I bark out angrily.

"Uh oh, I'm guessing that you're in the middle of a shoot right now…." Lissa trailed off, her voice scared. She knows not to call during work hours, so it better be good.

"Damn right I am," I growl in to the phone. Okay, my anger might still be from her damn binder that she had stuffed under my nose the past two nights, but I wasn't to blame.

"I'm so sorry Rose, but I need to tell you that tomorrow night Tasha and Dimitri are going to be here!" She hastened through her talking, knowing that I was very annoyed and should get it over with quickly, she went in the wrong direction.

"WHAT? VASILISSA DRAGOMIR, TELL ME YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT I HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE THE HOUSE READY BY TOMORROW SO THAT A RANDOM STRNAGER THAT I DO NOT KNOW CAN SLEEP IN A SPARE ROOM?" I shouted in the phone, multiple emotions playing with me at the same time; anger, shock, annoyance, and frustration the major ones.

I _still _haven't cleaned up the house, or fixed the broken front steps! I was going to do that tomorrow and Sunday, because I had work on Monday. What else was she going to throw at me? That the only color left to wear at the wedding is pink? I would die if that ever happened, I hated pink.

"That's exactly what I said, so you might have to start cleaning now." She replied slowly, causing me to groan in frustration.

"You're lucky you're my best friend, because I wouldn't do this for anybody else!" I told her sternly. She sighed, knowing the worst was over, but my day was turning into a disaster; I was going to need therapy after this.

"Sorry Rose, but thanks for taking Dimitri in. He really is a sweet guy, I have met him before, he isn't a complete stranger, I trust him." I rolled my eyes, she was too nice, so I couldn't take her word for it.

"Okay Liss, I gotta get back to work so I can leave to go do the house."

"Alright Rose, bye!" She replied into the phone before the dial tone rang through my ear. I closed my phone and looked around me to see everybody stopped and staring at me shocked.

"Get back to work, or I _will _get Victor to fire you." I called my voice strong and commanding to those around me. Before I knew it, everyone was moving frantically, not wanting to get on my bad side.

I turn back to the guys and they are looking at me sympathetically. I sigh, exhaustion leaking into my face. I rub my hands on my face and sit down in the chair besides me. Trying to get a hold of my surroundings, I took some deep breaths before clearing my throat.

"Sorry guys, I think I got all of the pictures I needed, you can go," I call, not taking my hands of my face. I wait for them to leave, but no one replies. I sigh into my palms, but before I saw it coming, my hands were being pulled away from my face, and huge arms are encasing me in a hug.

"I'm not used to seeing you like this Rose, you're always so composed and hidden behind that tough exterior of yours, what's wrong?" I sigh into Denis's chest, before pulling away from him. The other two are behind him with worried expressions also, waiting for my reply.

"I just had a bad morning, and Lissa just told me that the guy that I allowed to stay at my house is coming early and I have no clue who he is." I muttered.

"Why are you allowing a guy to stay at your house, that you don't even know?" Lev asked confused.

I smirked, "Christian finally proposed, the wedding is next month." They grinned, but seeing as I wasn't smiling along with them, they dropped.

"Are you worried about this guy? Cause if he ever tries anything, we will be honored to kick his ass for you." That brings a laugh to my lips. I stand up and pat their naked chests.

"It's alright boys, I can handle it."

"Behind that big camera of yours?" Artur asked smiling. I hit him on the back of the head and he flinched back, grimacing.

"I'm not always behind my camera," I tell them, shaking my head. They raise an eyebrow and exchange looks between each other. Okay maybe I was behind my camera 24/7, but that didn't mean anything. I wanted to capture every beautiful image of life, keeping memories with me always.

The boys weren't only my subjects, they were also my friends. We have hung out multiple times away from the studio, they have even hung out with the group a couple times.

"Yeah sure, well we have another appointment downtown so we will catch you later Rose. Call one of us if you need anything, especially with that guy." I smiled at Denis and nodded.

"I sure will, bye guys!" I called as they walked out the back door, waving back. I felt lighter, after talking to them, better than I did 5 minutes ago, which was a good thing. I looked at my watch and then towards Sydney.

"Can I please go Sydney? Call in sick or something! I have to fix my house up before Dimitri's cousin comes and thinks I'm a slob with no money." I plead, my hands clutched together in front of my chest, shaking them back and forth.

"To tell you the truth Rose, you only had one appointment today, I'll go and upload them onto your computer and pick the best ones, and then send them to Victor for you." I squealed and hugged Sydney hard.

"Thank you Syd! Your awesome!" She chuckled and patted my back awkwardly. "You are still coming to the dinner tonight right?" I question, which she responds by nodding her head.

"I promised I would," she replied, pulling back. I grinned and placed my camera into my bag carefulkly before slipping it over my shoulder and handing her the little card that was inside of the camera that I had remembered to take out before turning it off.

"I'll see you tonight Syd!" I shouted, running through the door and racing to my car. I probably looked bi-polar right now. Not only was I depressed this morning, but not 10 minutes ago I was completely angry. Now I'm happy, and anxious to get home and figure out what I need to buy from the store.

An hour later, I pulled into my drive and walk to the door. It took three trys to get the right key in the hole before shoving the door with all my weight so that it opened.

I stood in my doorway and inspected the damage, and I already felt mentally tired. This was going to take me _forever. _

I started by picking up every piece of clothing laying around the house and separating it into piles to wash. It took me an hour, _that's how bad it was. _I then picked up all of the dishes laying around from when I fell asleep at night and forgot about them.

I found a plate of what looked like ravioli, but I was pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be green. _Gross. _

For three hours, I flew around the house cleaning, picking up, washing, folding, and dusting my house. Soon my bedroom was cleaned; bed was made, shelves were orderly, and my camera was on my dresser. Next the kitchen was finished; dished washed, counters cleaned, air freshener sprayed, and floors mopped. Once those two rooms were done, I stopped and sat down on my couch, staring at the dust collecting on the television set in front of me, and the little coffee table.

I groaned when I saw that it was 2:15, still 4 more hours until I had to start getting ready for dinner, and I was about to pass out from exhaustion. Why the hell did Christian's cousin have to come early?

**So yeah, I wanted Dimitri to come a little early, and have Rose be a little disorganized, but did you understand the little bird saying? I looked it up and everything, the red cardinal is going to be a symbol in upcoming chapters, anyways, thats all for tonight...review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here is my next update! Yay! I write a little bit each day and today I had time to finish it so please enjoy this chapter and thank you to everyone who is reviewing the story and adding it to thiwr favorites list! It means alot!**

Chapter 3

_"Look what Aunt Alberta gave me!" I squealed excitedly as I waved the camera in front of my small frame. It was my very first camera, and it was **mine. **_

_She continued picking up papers that were scattered around their small living room, stuffing them in the black side bag that she took to work every day. Without even glancing at me she called, "That's great sweetheart!" My excitement dimmed as she picked up the last paper and sighed in relief._

_"You didn't even look Mom," I whispered, but she seemed to not hear me because she grabbed her phone and then kicked the armchair that my snoozing babysitter was sitting on. She glanced up through her old, round glasses and peered at my mother._

_"I'll be back late, Abe should be back before then," Mom told her, before walking quickly out of the room and through our front door. No goodbye kiss or hug, not even a **goodbye. **I stared dejectedly at the wooden door, my camera lazily hanging from its strap on my arm._

_"Well I thinks it's time for bed Reese," the babysitter called, slouching as if she was about to fall asleep once more. Tears welled up in my eyes as I stared at her, and then turned towards the stupid door that opened up to the world that held my mother; the world that I wasn't a part of._

_ I pulled the camera up, staring through the little peephole and snapping a picture at it. My first picture, one that would stay with me forever and one that would remind me repeatedly of the women that I called Mom._

_"It Rose," I whisper, before walking out of the room, silent tears framing my cheeks._

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing by my head. My back was burning, and I saw that I was still lying on the couch that I had surprisingly fallen asleep on. I don't remember when I did, but I felt a little more rested.

I searched the couch for my phone, squeezing my hand through the cushions, and touching a cold piece of metal. I gripped it and tugged it out of the tight space before flipping it open and pushing 'talk'.

"Hello," I murmured groggily, my voice still laced with sleep.

"I'm sorry to have woken you up, but is this perhaps Rose Hathaway?" A rich voice rang through the receiver. My heart lurched at the sound, the man's voice melting around me.

Gaining my voice back, I cleared my throat before talking into the receiver, "its fine, I needed to get up, but yes this is her."

"Good, it would be bad if I got on your bad side and you decide to kick me out on the street tomorrow." He chuckled, and I paused to think of what he meant, my mind still fogging, not allowing his words to click inside my head.

"Um, "I hum into the receiver. As if knowing what was wrong he quickly started talking again.

"Please forgive me; I forgot to mention who I was. I'm Dimitri Belikov, I'm sure Christian has told you about me." My eyes widen in shock, finally figuring out who exactly I was talking with. I recognized the accent, Russian of course, but it didn't click.

"Oh! Yes, you're the one that will be staying at my house." I slap my head with the palm of my hand.

"Yes that is correct," he returned.

"How did you get my number?" I ask surprised.

"Lissa gave me your number because I just wanted to thank you for letting me stay at your house. I hope that it's not of inconvenience to you…"

"No! Of course not!" I rush out. For some reason I wanted to pull this man from the phone and get as close to him as I could get. His voice was warm and melted around me like honey, as his laughter at what I just said, wraps me up in a veil of peace.

"Well I'm very grateful that you are allowing me a room. I also sorry that I am coming a couple days early, but Tasha decided that she wanted to come a little bit earlier." I scowled at the name, though he couldn't see.

"It's fine!" I tell him grimacing. As I loom around my now clean living room, I catch a peek at the clock on the wall, my eyes bugging out of their sockets. "Shit! I'm sorry Dimitri but I have a dinner tonight with Lissa and some of her friends."

"No problem, I will see you tomorrow then," he replied, and I felt like I could see a small smile in his voice.

"Tomorrow," I reply before exchanging farewells and running to my room. It was already 6:30 and I had to be at the restaurant at 7.

Fan-freaking-tastic.

I head towards the bathroom quickly and rub my face, which was sticking with dried-tears from the dream I had had during my nap. It was more of a memory then a dream though, I remember that day exactly, because that first camera, that first picture turned my life towards the art of photography, my love for it.

I washed my face down with cool water and then brush my teeth quickly. I wandered towards my makeup on the counter and applied some blush to my cheeks, which were slightly flushed. I wondered why they were red when they turned deeper in realization.

_Did his voice really make me blush? Was I losing it? _I thought to myself, shaking my head like I was crazy. I pushed the wild thoughts out of my head and grabbed the gold eye-shadow, deciding to wear the gold, satin, knee-length dress that I had bought while shopping with Lissa two weekends before. I then rubbed some eyeliner on and moved the mascara wand over my eyelashes, allowing my eyes to grow bigger.

Not having enough time to make it perfect, I smeared some clear lip gloss on my lips and rubbed them together, before running towards my closet. I shoved piles upon piles of clothes out of my way until I found the dress I was looking for. I put on a strapless bra, seeing as the dress was strapless, and shimmied into the silky dress.

Afterwards, I grabbed some gold pumps from the floor in the back of my closet at slipped into those before clicking my heels towards the brush on my nightstand. I brushed through the tangled mess before letting the waves flow down my back.

I smiled sexily at my reflection before moving towards my little coin-purse and then grabbing my small hot pink camera that I usually took for group events, such as these. I grabbed my phone and keys before sauntering over to my shiny, red car.

As I was seated, I smiled at my reflection in the rearview mirror before backing out of my drive and cruising towards the restaurant. I looked at clock at saw that it was 6:52, cursing, I speed up my speed.

_I was going to be late, again. _I grumbled to myself.

"You're late… again." Lissa sighed as I rushed into the restaurant gasping. I smiled innocently at her and she rolled her eyes. "Come on, we're already seated, I knew that this would happen so I waited." She smirked in my direction and I scowled.

"You know me so well," I muttered sarcastically.

"Don't I?" She shot back. I shrugged my shoulders, of course she did.

"Why were you late this time?" She asked, honestly curious.

"Well for three hours I ran around my house cleaning up for a random visitor, and then falling asleep…no passing out from exhaustion, just to have the random visitor call me and wake me up." I told her in my matter of fact voice.

"Dimitri called you?" She asked surprised.

"No, there is another random person staying at my house the same amount of days and is arriving tomorrow, unless there is something you aren't telling me?" I raised my eyebrows at her and she shook her head.

"Someone is in a grouchy mood," a voice murmured from the room that we had just entered. I turned my glare to the man whose arm was around a petite blonde, whose ringlets were coiled tightly and framed her head.

"Shut it Castile, unless you want to have someone stay at your house tomorrow?" He rolled his eyes. "Didn't think so," I shot out at him.

"Chillax little photographer, no need to get your panties in a twist," I glared at Adrian who was across the table from Eddie Castile and Mia Rinaldi, the two who first caught my attention as I walked in.

"Get a life Adrian," I called.

"I do have a life, which I hope to include waking up to your lovely face every morning." I rolled my eyes and him and crossed my arms.

"In your dreams Ivashkov," I snorted.

"Always little photographer, always," he winked his emerald green eye at me and I sighed in frustration. Lissa had already sat down besides Christian, Mia and Eddie besides Christian, Adrian besides Lissa and Sydney, who I hadn't realized was in the room until now, was seated beside him. One chair was left between Eddie and Sydney and I gladly took it.

I glance at Lissa and she meets my eye, nodding slightly. She looked as if she was trying to hide her exultation, which I'm sure I wasn't the only one noticing. I was right.

"So Liss, what news are we here for," Mia quipped, smiling as she saw Lissa bouncing around in her seat. Christian chuckled before resting his arm across her shoulders, calming her movements.

Grinning, Lissa grabbed Christian's arm and pulled him up so that they were standing side by side. I noticed her choice of clothing, which was a satin, strapless green dress with large black flowers decorating the top. The color brought out her eyes perfectly with her white skin and pin-straight hair. A black floral clip decorated her hair also.

"Well," Lissa's voice rang out causing me to focus on her words once more, "Chris has asked me to marry him." I smiled as I heard congrats from everyone, and watched as all the men patted Christian on the back and asked him when he finally grew the balls to ask. I laughed at them, silently agreeing.

I watched as my best friend kissed her fiancé passionately, an ecstatic twinkle in their eyes. After everyone congratulated the happy couple, the server came for drink orders. The rest of the night passed fluidly, excited conversation flowing throughout the whole room.

As I watched the whole ordeal, I picked my camera up and stood silently from my seat. Everyone was busy conversing with someone, all of them laughing as I brought my camera up and snapping a picture of my friends.

All of them looked up from the flash and I smiled sheepishly at them. The grinned broadly back at me, knowing that when the camera came out I wasn't done until the memory ran out.

"I almost thought that you forgot it little photographer," Adrian said, smirking. I winked at him and shook my head.

"I don't forget anything," I called, tapping my forehead.

"Really? You seem to forget that work starts at 9 in the morning and any other time." Sydney replied tapping her fingers on the table. I gulped at my assistant before shrugging my shoulders.

"I'm not late all the time," I muttered, but stared open-mouthed as everyone crossed their arms and raised an eyebrow.

"Eddie's birthday party last year, you arrived five minutes after Eddie walked in. It was supposed to be a surprise." Lissa remarked.

"And when we were supposed to meet at the mall for black Friday and you made us what for 30 minutes after most of the cute clothes were gone." Mia added grimacing.

"And when-"

"OK! I'm always late! Happy now?" I growled. There was only one place that I always went to on time. I never wanted to miss a minute, so I was never late.

"What place?" Eddie asked confused. I snapped my mouth shut, realizing that I had spoken my thought aloud. I never spoken to them about my Aunt Alberta, I didn't want to share that part of my life with them; I wanted to keep it for myself, hold onto her longer, but that didn't seem possible anymore. I tried as hard as I could to keep her under wraps but I guess not hard enough.

"Nowhere," I reply quickly, shaking my head furiously. His eyebrows squeezed together studying me. "I look at my camera, trying to find conversation changer, before sighing and putting it away. "I'm just going to go to the restroom," I choke, failing to keep my voice controlled.

Before anyone could stop me, I raced out of the room and towards the restroom. Times like these, I couldn't stop my emotions from overloading, couldn't stop the memories from coming.

_"Aunt Alberta! I'm here!" I call into the house as I walk in exactly at 5 o' clock. _

_"In here sweetie!" Her voice chimes from the patio. I skip in there, wondering what cool lesson she was going to teach to me today. She smiles at me from her seat in the whisker chair and pats her lap, motioning me to sit. "Right on time," she says as she looks at her watch, "as always." _

_"I love coming over here Aunt Alberta! I never want to miss a minute!" I sing, smiling my adorable 9 year-old smile. She messes with my hair, chuckling at my amusement._

_"I'm glad to hear it baby-girl, now look over there, what do you see?" I squint my eyes at the old tree in her backyard, searching it for the thing she was trying to show me. I spot a bird's nest on one of the branches, my eyes wide and taking in the small birds nesting in it._

_"A bird's nest!" I exclaim, overjoyed that I have figured it out. _

_"Well the mama bird in there hasn't left the nest but 3 times, and those three times were only to bring her babies some food." She whispered in my ear._

_"She is a good Mama," I tell her, "not like my mama, she is never home." I finish sadly. She patted my shoulder and I looked up at her, tears outlining my eyes. _

_"She is just trying to get the money to raise you; I wish that she made a little time for you though."_

_"I wish you were my mama Aunt Alberta," I whine._

_"Well sweetie, I'm always here for you, always will be. I might not be your momma but being your Aunt means the world to me. If I was your momma then I wouldn't be able to give you cookies before dinner, and would tell you that you should be doing your homework right now." She replies smirking at me. I stick out my bottom lip, thinking for a moment before nodding my head._

_"You're a great Aunt!" I exclaim._

_"That's what I thought," we both giggled before looking back at the birds in the trees._

_I stared at all of the people surrounding my Aunt's house, feeling small as I look up at them. My vision was colored in black, shocking my senses, proving to me that this wasn't a dream._

_I didn't want to believe that Aunt Alberta was dead. She was fine not too long ago, she can't be gone. Who was I going to talk to? Who was going to soothe me when I was down? Who was going to be the mom that I always wanted?_

_Silent tears fell down my cheeks, my insides felt like they were caving in and I could breathe. I ran through the room, shoving through the many people, trying to find a place that wasn't suffocating me. _

_I ran through the front door, running around the side of the house, and sliding between the wooden gate and the pole that it connected to loosely. I ran through the backyard and towards the old tree that nestled in the middle. I wrapped myself around it, sobbing into its bark, wishing for my Aunt to pop up in front of me and whisper 'just kidding', but that wasn't going to happen, ever._

"Rose?" I snap out of my memories, touching my cheek to see that I was crying, and then feeling like I couldn't breathe. "Rose? Please come out."

I wipe my cheeks and try to catch my breath, before opening the small stall that I had thrown myself into and facing Lissa head on.

"I'm sorry Liss," I whisper, looking down at the ground. I feel her arms wind around me and squeeze me tight.

"Will you tell me what's wrong?" She whispered into my ear. It slightly reminded me of how Aunt Alberta soothed me, but everything right now reminded me of her. "It sounded like you were having a panic attack in there."

"I kind of was, but it was more of an emotional attack. I can't breathe, and my emotions are out of control, my thoughts attack me and I can't get out." It was the first time I was telling her about this; actually, it was the first time that I was telling anybody about this.

"How often do these occur?" She asked softly. I didn't want to tell her, knowing it involved me telling her about my Aunt Alberta. As I stay silent, she pushes a different question at me.

"Why do they occur? Does it involve the place that you talked about?" I flinched at her words, giving myself away. "What place is it Rose?"

"My Aunt Alberta's house," I whisper finally, gaining the courage to tell my best friend. She seemed proud that she was getting some answers out of me.

"You never told me you had an Aunt."

"She died when I was younger," I murmured, closing my eyes.

"Oh, Rose I'm so sorry." She whispered. I sniffle, grabbing a paper towel and wiping my nose with it.

"She was my best friend back then, my only friend. I was always at her house, 5 o' clock sharp, no later. She knew everything in the world, from my younger perspective. I was so attached to her; it caused me to have these emotional attacks when she died. She was like the mother I never had."

"Rose, why did you never tell me about your attacks?"

"Because if I told you about the attacks, then I would have to tell you about her, and I couldn't do that. I wanted to hide her from everyone, keep her for myself. She was the most important person in my life, and she taught me almost all I know. When she died, the first thing I thought was 'how was I going to be able to do this alone?'" A few more tears slipped and Lissa embraced me tightly.

"It's good that you opened up Rose, thank you for telling me this. I will always be here for you sis, never forget that. If you feel like letting go, then talk to me, if you feel like you are going to have an attack, I will find a way to be there." I smiled at her and squeezed tighter.

"Thank you Liss, you really are my best friend." I whispered letting go.

"I hope so, for a while I thought Mia took my place." She joked, and I chuckled and hit her shoulder.

"Never, though she is catching up." I reply which earned me a shove in return. I felt lighter than I did all night, whether it was finally telling someone of my Aunt, or just letting my emotions run free, I felt good.

"I'm sorry I ruined your night Liss," she shrugged.

"It's just a night with friends, and you happen to be one of them." I smile and hook arms with her as we walk out of the restroom door. Lissa quickly stopped me and wiped her thumbs under my eyes, bringing them back to see black smudges on her fingers.

She sighed and pulled me back into the restroom to fix my makeup while I laughed softly.

"Thanks everyone for coming," Lissa chanted to everyone as we left the restaurant. Everyone smiled and congratulated her and Christian once more. I watched as Adrian and Sydney flirted with each other as he walked her to her car.

_Great, now I really am the last person in the group without a significant other. _I muttered to myself in my head.

I glared at them before turning back towards Lissa. I smiled and hugged her tightly, knowing she understood why she was getting the hug; not only because she was my best friend, but because of the talk we had in the bathroom.

"Thanks for listening," I whispered in her ear. She pulled back and smiled softly.

"I'm here when you need me," she replied. I might have told Lissa about Aunt Alberta, but she didn't understand the half of it. She knows it hurts me, but she doesn't know how badly. She wouldn't be able to understand even the slightest degree of the relationship between my Aunt and myself. I could barely get it into words, though it didn't really explain it, there were no words to.

"I'll see you later; I still have to work on the house a little more tomorrow morning for Dimitri's arrival, so I might not be over tomorrow like I usually am." I tell her slowly. I'm always at her house on Saturdays and sometimes even Sundays, but I don't like to hear the ruckus in Lissa's room at night when I stay over.

"That's fine Rose, I'll see you whenever then." I smiled and nodded at her, before kissing her cheek and punching Christian in the arm. I got in my car and drove back to the house, searching my photo album before finding the picture I wanted.

The picture was of a large tree, leaves green and wood as brown as ever, looking like any other tree at first glance, but it wasn't an ordinary tree. Tiny details came be marked in it, such as the tiny twin on the side that cut me as I ran past it, and a missing piece of bark on the left where I tried to climb and it broke off. One other detail was the small bird's nest that was nestled into the branch on the top.

It was the same tree found in Aunt Alberta's backyard, the tree that held so many memories. I wiped a tear away from my eye before shutting the small album and hiding it on the bookshelf in my room. I went into the bathroom and cleaned the make-up off of my face before peeling myself out of the dress and slipping into a comfortable pair of shorts and a tank.

I wrapped my hair up in a bun on top of my head and brushed my teeth. Once my bathroom procedures were done, I climbed into my bed and let my mind drift to happier times, before the time that tears controlled my life.

**Soo? How was it? You got a little snippet of Dimitri and what is happening? Rose is already attracted to him? What the hell is wrong with her...haha anyone want to guess whos in the next chapter? I'm sure most of you know!(: Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey everyone, Im baaaack, ok too creepy, but I do have the next chapter for you! Mr. Hunky Russian is inside if you happen to want to,,,you know read it? I know you have all been waiting for this sooo...here it is, please welcome Dimitri Belikov!**

Chapter 4

I had my alarm set for 7:30, trying to give myself more time to fix up the exterior of the house. I splashed cold water on my face, trying to wake myself up, and it semi-worked. I grumbled to myself as I walked down the stairs towards the kitchen, ready to chew out Dimitri for not giving me his time of arrival.

I was never a morning person, a mostly all of my friends knew this. They steered clear of me when I had to wake up earlier than normal, even my employees took two steps back when I came into the office at 8.

I fixed myself a bowl of cereal, not bothering for anything fancy. I was a horrible cook back in high school and college, usually eating take-out or at Lissa's in college. She didn't mind, but I finally learned to fend for myself once I found myself living in a house by myself.

In the morning, I get a coffee, but then grab fast food on the way home. On weekends, I end up at Lissa and Christian's house, more often when Christian actually moved in. He was an excellent cook, taking culinary classes in college and one in high school.

I breathed into my cereal, pushing it around slightly as I thought about the many things I had to do today. I dumped my uneaten cereal into the sink, rinsing it out, and then heading to the cabinet and searched for a pad of paper and something to write with.

"Ok," I mutter, tapping the yellow pencil to my forehead. I started with the basics, scribbling down _white paint, nails, wood, curtains, and air freshener. _I scratched my forehead, before thinking about added some decorations to spice up my home a little.

Thinking that I would figure out if I needed anything else done, I headed upstairs to get ready. I threw some grey sweats on and a short-sleeved white shirt. I threw my hair up in a ponytail, and looked at myself in the mirror.

I knew I was going to sweating, so I didn't bother with makeup. I slipped my feet into my comfortable flip-flops and grabbed my car keys.

"Hello Ma'am, did you find what you were looking for?" The young casher asked, his eyes trailing down my body slowly. I grimaced in disgust, regarding the young, teenage boy with a scowl. The words 'I think what you are looking for is right here', were hidden behind his words.

I might have looked plain today, but my curves were still perfect, and without makeup, I still looked good.

"Yes I did, my boyfriend will be happy that I got this stuff for him." I grinned. Okay, maybe that was a little low, but I was trying to save myself from a perverted teenager who looks like he had never heard of Clean and Clear before.

I saw his eyes sink in disappointment, before he silently scanned my items and let me pay. I walked out, slightly guilty, but it was covered by nerves. I was already 10 and I didn't know when Dimitri was going to be here.

I checked off the things that I have gotten so far: paint, wood, nails, some flowers for decoration, freshener, and curtains.

I sighed and started my car to head towards the house and start with the physical work needed on the house. Before long, I was carrying the interior stuff into the house, and leaving the exterior things on the porch.

I grabbed a vase from the closet shelf in the hallway and filled it with water before letting it swallow the white lilies that I had bought. I placed it in the kitchen, smiling as it already brightened up the kitchen. I sprayed some raspberry freshener into the room and around the other rooms.

I went into the living room and took down the curtains that guarded the window and traded the stained brown cloth with a light blue to give the room a little color. I went into the guest room and made sure that it looked good for the visitor.

Finally, I made it outside and grabbed my hammer that I had brought with me from inside. Pulling the nails from the battered steps, I pulled the wooden boards from its place and threw them by the trash can in the front.

I then got my measuring tape and measure the length of the new boards, marking off and starting the chainsaw, letting it easily cut through the wood.

I knew that all of this was usually a men's job, but I liked doing these things myself. I might have been sweating like crazy, and my clothes might be dirty and wet, but I felt satisfied as I nailed down the last board for my steps, testing it out softly, before patting myself on the back for a job well done.

I went inside and poured myself a glass of ice water, gulping it down quickly, and then repeating the action several times. Remembering that I wasn't done yet made me groan before I headed back outside.

It was already 1 in the afternoon, and all I had left to do was paint the front of the house. I grabbed a paint pan, a roller, the bucket of paint, and a screwdriver to lift the lid. I also grabbed a step stool since I was too short to reach the tall places.

I poured some white paint into the paint pan and rolled my roller in it a few times. I started with the bottom where some of the paint was peeling, rolling over it and covering it with a fresh slate of white. Soon enough the bottom was done and I needed the step stool.

"Damn, stupid, insolent spot," I growled reaching up to paint over the last spot. I was just an inch away when I lost my balance, wobbling forward. I pulled myself backwards so that I could stop myself from falling but it only pushed me in the opposite direction. I waited for my body to hit the ground, my eyes closed, until I realized that wasn't moving anymore.

Someone was laughing at me, and my body felt like it was on fire. I opened one eye and glanced up only to be met with the sight of a god. A hot, sexy, panty dropping god; that was the only thing that I could call him, seeing as I had no name to the gorgeous face above me.

I finally opened my senses and heard him laughing, his face showing amusement. His long, brown hair was brushed over his shoulders, and his dark, brown eyes were beautifully lit with smiles.

I was interrupted from my staring when he spoke. "Rose Hathaway?" He asked, finally pulling me up and helping me stand up, though my legs felt like Jell-O.

"Y-yes, the one and only," I replied, hiding me nervousness with attitude. "Are you new to this neighborhood?" _Please say yes, please say yes, _I chanted to myself in my head.

"Temporarily," he smirked and for some reason I felt like I was missing an inside joke. Do I know him? He smiled and looked up, making my gaze follows his, and I grimaced at the ugly spot that I couldn't reach. He reached over and grabbed the paint roller before dipping it in paint and easily reaching up marking the spot. He was tall, like 6'5, while I stood at a measly 5'4, a huge difference.

"Thanks," I muttered, as he handed me the roller back. He smiled widely, making my knees shake and my heart hammer. Where did he come from?

"Anytime Rose, if I'm going to be staying here, I should be holding my end up." I didn't understand his words, but as I looked at him my mouth slowly widened before turning into a full out gasp. _This _is Dimitri Belikov? This _god _is going to be staying in my house?

"Dimitri Belikov?" I asked surprised. He nodded and held his hand out.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, and I am really thankful that you are letting me stay at your house for the wedding." I shook my head and grinned.

"You already thanked me on the phone, don't worry, this house was getting to lonely with just me." I told him, setting the paint brush down and taking a glance at myself. "Sorry that I didn't get a chance to clean up better," I muttered, trying to wipe dried off my arm.

"Its fine," he told me, his eyes roaming my body. A blush crept onto my face as he brought them up to my face.

"Well how about we get you settled in, your room is already ready for you."

"Let me just get my things out of my truck." He told me, before jogging down and opening his ford truck. I stared at him and reminded myself to thank Lissa. He was hot, a nice guy, helpful, and I were already getting used to him, and I didn't want this month to end.

I tried to help him with his bags, even the smallest one, but he wouldn't let me. I knew he was capable of carrying them all, I mean his muscles are huge, but he was such a gentlemen that he didn't want me lifting a finger. God help me now.

"I'm going to go clean up myself up, please help you to anything in the kitchen or the living room. We can figure something out for food when I get out." I told him awkwardly as I stood in the doorway of the guest room. He smiled and nodded to me.

"Thank you," he replied, his smile turning me into mush. Was I going to last a month without jumping his bones?

"One thing though," he looked at me questiongly, "stop saying thank you. It is no problem at all; I'm glad that you are here, now I won't be so lonely, so you are helping me out just as much as I am helping you out."

I could see that he wanted to protest but he stopped and nodded to me. I smiled and walked out of the room, grabbing a change of clothes and walking out towards the bathroom.

I quickly stripped out of my clothes and entered the shower, sighing as the hot water hit my body. The steam relaxed me as the water massaged my aching muscles. Once most of the knots were out of my back and I felt more relaxed, I grabbed some vanilla body wash and scrubbed the dirt and paint off my body.

"Mmmh," I moaned as the vanilla scent sifted into my nose. I then cleaned my hair and turned the shower off, the cold water slightly leaking through. I grabbed one of my fluffy, red towels and wrapped it around my body, snuggling into it as I stepped onto the cool tiling in the bathroom.

Hastily, I changed into my clothes, which were faded blue shorts with string hanging off the end as if it was ripped, and a white tank that wrapped around the neck as straps and hugged my frame. My skin seemed tanner as I glanced at myself in the mirror.

I towel-dried my hair, giving it a scrunched look and then grabbed my things and walked out of the bathroom…and right into Dimitri.

"I think I'm going to get bruises if we keep meeting each other this way." I stated, grinning as I took two steps back. He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I'm sorry Rose, fate must be saying something if he wants us to keep running into each other, or in your case, falling." He smirked as I stuck my tongue out at him, trying, and failing, to hide my smile. Maybe letting this stranger, Christian's cousin, stay at my house isn't a bad thing. I felt like I already knew him for years.

And what was this talk about fate? Like the stars align, you should be together, type of fate? Cause I can live with that.

"So how about I put my things away and we can figure out something to eat." I applied, walking around him and turning backwards.

"Sounds like a plan," he smiled, lighting up the hallway. He then disappeared around the corner as I stared after him-wondering where he came from.

I walked towards my room, and quickly set my things on my bed, looking at my reflection and making sure I looked good.

_What the hell? I shouldn't care if I looked good! _I yelled at myself in my head.

_Be quiet, you know he is smoking hot and you want him! _Another voice yelled.

_I don't even know him! _

_That's never stopped you before, remember Jesse? _The voice sang, memories of my last boyfriend popping up in my head. I shook my head, trying to clear these thoughts. I think I am going crazy, am I really talking to myself?

I took in a huge gulp of air, flattened my white tank down, and walked out of the room. I found Dimitri standing awkwardly in the kitchen, glancing around him.

"You can sit at the table if you want," I told him, motioning to the small table in the corner of the kitchen. He looked at me, then the table before shaking his head.

"I'll help," I started to protest but he cut me off. "If I don't do anything I will feel guilty." I put my hands on my waist. I stared at him a few seconds, before sighing, the sides of my lips moving up slightly.

"Fine, I guess I wouldn't want you feeling guilty," I said, chuckling. He smiled in triumph, walking over to me.

"So what do you feel like having?" A perplexed emotion seeped onto his face.

"Um, it doesn't matter," I shook my head and searched the cabinets, finding the ingredients for spaghetti. I handed him the box of noodles and pointed to the pans.

"You can start on the noodles," I told him, and he got to work quickly, grabbing a pan and filling it with water before turning the stove on.

I started working on the meat sauce, and when we were both waiting for it to boil, I looked at him and found him staring at me. I cleared my throat, my face heating up.

"So Dimitri, you're from Russia right?" I asked, eliminating the silence.

"Yes I am," he replied nodding.

"How come you're Russian, but Christian isn't?" It had been on my mind for a while now, a mystery that I had yet to solve.

"My uncle or Christian's father is my mother's brother. They were both raised in Russia, but when my uncle got old enough he moved to the states and married an American women, or Christian's mom. My uncle's accent slowly diminished and when they had Christian he spoke English and his accent was English. I was born in Russia so I still talk Russian, and you can probably hear my accent." I slowly absorbed this information, letting it sink in.

"Who do you live with in Russia?" His face grew grim and he looked down, hiding his eyes.

"I used to live with my best friend Ivan; we had an apartment in Baia, real close to my family."

"What happened to him?" I asked, reading between the lines.

"One night, we were at a club, he told me to go on home because he was going to take longer, so I left him there, by himself. It was the most stupid decision I have ever made! He didn't come back to the apartment, and the police found him a week later, dead in an alley a block away from the club." His voice held so much regret and guilt, it reminded me of…me.

"It wasn't your fault Dimitri," I whispered, stirring the sauce.

"You don't know what it is like," he told me, his voice filled with steel. What did he mean? Of course I know what it felt like!

"Here is where you're wrong; you don't know anything about me. I have felt like that before," I breathed in deeply before setting the spoon off to the side of the sauce.

"Rose-"

"I'm not feeling hungry anymore; you can help yourself to whatever is the kitchen." How dare he come in and tell me how I feel. It was true, he didn't know me, but my mind was bringing up the memories of Aunt Alberta, and I didn't want him to see me if I broke down.

"Look Rose, I'm sorry. It was rude of me to talk to you like that. Of course I don't know anything about you, I don't know what you're feeling," I was staring at him, waiting for him to gather his thoughts. "How about we start over, I would really like to get to know you again. No slip-ups and no harsh words."

I mused over his words, and the guilty expression playing on his face. I wanted to clean his face of the guilt, and I felt confused as to why. Why did I want to help him, after he just wrongly accused me?

"Ok," the word felt foreign on my lips, "let's start over."

His smile lit up the room, and he took too steps forward, holding out his hand. "Hello, I'm Dimitri Belikov," I wrapped my hand around his and shook it firmly.

"Rosemarie Hathaway, but you can call me Rose." He nodded and released my hand, and I felt emptiness fill me.

"Should I have run into you or something? We don't usually meet like this." Giggles filled the room, mine of course, and he seemed to enjoy it as he joined in too.

"I think this is the introduction we should have had, please don't run me over with your gigantic form," he smirked at me and flexed his large muscles.

"I'm not that big," he muttered, but I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, sure you aren't." I told him, looking up to him as he looked down to me.

"It's not my fault you're so tiny." I gaped at him and hit him in the shoulder with my fist. "I think I felt something it my shoulder but I'm not sure…"

"How about you- the sauce!" I yelled turning and picking up the pan as smoke crept around the steaming frame. I cursed and stirred the blackened substance.

"Pizza?" He asked, staring at it.

"Phone's in the living room."

"Your sister really paid your girlfriend to leave?" I laughed louder as he nodded his head.

"Never saw her again," he sighed.

"Ooo, did you like her? You know, like like her?" I asked, waggling my eyebrows. Laughter burst from his lips, echoing around the small living room.

"No definitely not, Ivan set us up hoping I would stop be a loner and date someone," he rolled his eyes, "I never let him pick out another girl for me again."

I felt relief wash over me, and I cursed myself. "So have you found any other girl?"

"No," he muttered, tucking a piece of loose hair behind his ear.

"Oh," more relief, damn I need to get that under control.

"What about you, we have talked about me too much and I know very little about you." He smiled and leaned forward on the couch towards me. I was sitting on the same couch, on the opposite end with my legs tucked underneath me and my arm spread across the back.

"No," I echoed his same answer from moments ago.

"No, as in you won't share, or no you don't have a boyfriend." He questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't have a boyfriend." I stated slowly.

"And why does a pretty girl like you not have a boyfriend?" My heart fluttered at his words and I felt my face flush.

"I used to…" I trailed off, looking at the darkened window.

"What happened?" He asked softly, timidly.

"He turned out to be a complete asshole who only wanted me for sex." I muttered, glancing down, disgusted at myself.

"That's horrible, that makes me want to find him and beat him to a pulp." Dimitri growled, making my head snap up.

"I want to," I muttered. "Can I ask you a question?"

I seemed to surprise him and myself for that matter, because I couldn't keep my mouth shut.

"Anything," he replied.

"Do you…um…do you feel like we have known each other forever?" He stared me in the eyes, making me want to look down, but I couldn't.

"Yes, but I didn't know if you felt the same way. I feel like I could tell you everything."

"I feel the same way," I chuckled and looked down. "You know when Lissa first told me that you were coming I didn't know what to expect, I didn't want a stranger in my house, but they told me that you were nice and kind…"

"What do you say now?"

"I agree with them."

"Well when Christian told me that I will be staying at your house I thought it was going to be awkward and you were going to be different- I was wrong." We smiled at each other and after a few seconds I broke away and  
>stood up.<p>

"I think it's time for me to go to bed, goodnight Dimitri." I whispered, walking towards my bedroom. "I trust you enough to not come and kill me in my sleep."

"I promise that I won't, and Rose, though you hate me saying it, thank you."

"Of course Dimitri," I turned and walked out of the room. This is so weird, no awkwardness, no tightness, it was like he was my best friend, other than Lissa.

Who is he?

**So what do you think of Dimitri? He is nice, sweet, and Russian (duh). I like the relationship that they have established already, its like they have been friends for years and I want it like that, but do you like Dimitri? I hope soo, please Review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey everyone(; I saw the reviews and wow(: Thanks guys!(: I hope you like this chapter because I have now brought in someone that has waited long enough to come into the story(; Enjoy!**

**Chapter 5**

I woke up the next morning to the smell of bacon; the scent had me searching for clothes pronto. Being me, I stubbed my toe on the dresser and ended up knocking my photo album off. I cursed and picked it up softly, placing it back where it was and limping towards the door.

"Are you alright?" Dimitri asks concerned as I limped into the kitchen. I found him behind the stove, spatula in hand, and bacon sizzling in the pan. It smelled _so good! _

"I just stubbed my toe on my dresser," I replied, and then shooting him with my own question, "You made breakfast?"

"It's the least I could do," he murmured smiling and moved the bacon onto a plate besides him. "Lissa called your house phone and told me to tell you that we are going to her house for lunch."

"Oh, okay," I limped over to the chair in front of Dimitri and sat down. It was silent, not an awkward one, but a nice, calm silence.

"Christian told me that you are photographer," he said, looking up at me, taking his eyes off the bacon. I blushed and looked down, nodding softly.

"You work at Spirit Magazine?" I nodded again, "And I'm guessing the photos hanging around the house are yours?"

"Your smart," I smirked sarcastically, he smiled and turned the stove off. For the first time I noticed that a stack of pancakes were sitting on the counter besides the bacon.

"I've think I have been told that once before," he tapped his chin and I laughed out loud.

"You really didn't have to make breakfast Dimitri," I told him as he set a plate in front of me. "I should be getting up earlier and making _you _breakfast."

"I have nothing else to do, like I said last night, I will feel guilty if I don't help." I rolled my eyes at his statement and bite into a piece of the pancakes. I moaned in delight, the rich flavors capturing my mouth with wonder.

"Good?"

"_Very._"

I devoured the rest of the plate in a matter of seconds, rubbing my stomach and closing my eyes once I was finished. "I don't think I have ever tasted anything this good before."

"I'm sure that you are just exaggerating, didn't you have a favorite food when you were little? I know my mother makes the best black bread in the family." He closed his eyes and smiled, like he could taste it on his lips.

"Well," I didn't know how to respond to this, I never had a favorite food from my parents; they were never around to make me anything for me to fall in love with.

"Well?" He leaned in a bit, waiting for my response.

"My parents were never around to make me food, so I can't really say that I loved any of their cooking…" I trailed off, rubbing my arm.

"Oh, Rose I'm sorry…"

"Don't, I'm fine really, I'm used to it now."

"You shouldn't have needed to get used it, it's like they stole your childhood, not letting you experience things that all children should experience." He sighed and tucked a piece of hair behind his ear, "What did they do?"

"I never knew what my father did, but I think it involved being a mob boss. My mom was always at work, she was a teacher at the University back home." I thought he would look at me with pitiful eyes, but I only saw sympathy. "I'm okay with it though, I became the person I am today and I wouldn't change it for anything."

"Do you want to know what I see in the person you are today?" I nodded, interested in what he had to say. "Though I have only know you for less than a day, I see a strong, independent woman who has a warm heart and is loyal to all of her friends. She has faced hard things in her life but came out stronger. She is beautiful and happy and anyone would be happy to have her in their life, but she is hiding behind something that I can't figure out, something she is keeping locked up and not letting out, something she hasn't told anyone before."

_What the- he was doing so well! How can he see that- he could read me so well, and he knew I was hiding something from everyone. _I also didn't want to talk about this subject, he might be interested in unraveling the secret but I'm not interested in telling it.

"Um, I-I," I stuttered and tried to figure out a way out of this. "I'm going to get ready for the day." I got out of my chair quickly and stumbled towards my room, shutting the door. I reached for my album and started flipping through the pages, flipping quicker and quicker until I found the right one.

"This isn't right Aunt Alberta, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked you that day. It's all my fault…" I knew the wall that I was hiding behind, it was the one that hid the hid the guilt, the one that I tried not to show to anyone, but somehow, this one guy can figure it out?

Guilt. The emotion was in control, the emotion that I bowed under. I remember what happened the day that she was killed, the same day as my school play, the one that I persuaded her to go to, though she had something else to do that day.

I stood there in the picture, an Indian dress hanging off my body and moccasins wrapped around my feet. My hair was in pigtails with a piece of cloths around it. Feathers hung from it and from the outfit. I was Pocahontas, playing one of the main parts in the play. Aunt Alberta had her arm slung around my shoulder and my arms was reached out in front of me, the camera in my hand, taking the picture. Her hair was cropped short, styled to perfection as I smiled.

It was before my mom picked me up and took me to the school, Aunt Alberta had to do something and would be there when it started. Though my mom dropped me off, she didn't stay, neither did my dad, he was gone on a business trip.

I never saw Aunt Alberta again, her car crashed on the way to the school, she was going too fast, trying to get there in time, when an eighteen-wheeler hit her from the driver's side, killing her instantly.

This is where my guilt came in, my episodes that I have, are because of guilt. Crying and hiding were part of the guilt. The guilt came from being the reason my Aunt died. I made her come, it was my fault that she died, and it was my fault that she sped so she could make the play.

The reasons I shed tears, the reason I run away from the talk of _other family members_, the reason that I haven't visited my family in two years.

I stared at the picture longer, no longer holding in the sobs that shook my body. I heard a knock on the door, but I couldn't speak or move from my spot on the floor.

"Rose?" Dimitri asked, his voice muffled through the door. I tried to stifle my sobs, but I knew he could hear it because I heard the knob being turned. I turned my face away from the door and left my head in my hands, breathing in deeply.

The door opened and I felt his footsteps enter the room. A sharp intake of breath was all I heard before I felt a hand touch my shoulder.

"Rose, are you okay?" He whispered, trying to get me to look up at him. I shook my head, keeping it in my hands. "Right, stupid question," he muttered, "it was inconsiderate of me to say what I did. If you were hiding something it would have been for a reason, and I shouldn't have brought it up, I am truly sorry Rose."

"It's not your fault," I whispered once I could control my voice. "Your just the first person to see that, I guess it startled me."

"I'm sorry for startling you," I looked up then and saw how sorry he really was. He was kneeling on the floor besides me, hand still resting on my shoulder, and face inches away from my own.

"It's fine Dimitri, I guess you could say that I am hiding something though…" _was I really going to tell this guy met yesterday, when I haven't even told all of my friends? _"My Aunt died when I was young, she was the only real parent I had growing up, she was like my guide and she was my best friend…" _Answer: yes, yes I was._

"How did she die?" He whispered softly.

"Car crash, on the way to my school play," I looked down and noticed the album laying by my side, Dimitri seemed to notice it too because he picked it up and stared at the picture in front of him.

"Is this her?" I nodded and he touched her face in the picture, "she is beautiful."

"She was, I thought she was the most beautiful women on the planet," I chuckled and touched her face with my finger, brushing his in the process. We looked up at each other and I just stared at him in amazement.

The moment ended though when I heard a knock at the door. I pulled away from him and stood up, my knees shaking slightly.

"I'm just going to get that," I whispered, quickly walking out of the room. I didn't even check to see what his reaction was, I all but ran to the door, hoping for a distraction.

"Oh. My. God." I whispered, my hand covering my mouth. Apparently, life was full of surprises today.

"Hey Rosie," he said, pulling me into a hard hug. His uniform covered him from head to toe, camo sticking out amongst him.

"Mase," I cried, throwing my arms around him. He laughed and spun me around in a circle while I laughed with joy. "What the hell Mase? I thought you were in-"

"Nope, Lissa called me last week and told me that her and Chris finally tied the knot, so Commander Alto gave me leave, and here I am now, on your doorstep." I smiled, feeling like I would explode with joy right now.

Mason was my childhood friend, from kindergarten up to the last year of high school, we had dated for the last two years of high school, but soon we had to split ways because Mason decided that he was going to join the Army after high school. We stayed in touch over the years, but I hadn't heard from him in over 7 months!

He only knew Lissa when he met her on Christmas break. Commander Alto let the troops go home to their families on Christmas, and Mason did before he came to me. Besides Lissa, he was my best friend, and soon Lissa and him became friends also.

I slapped him across the head, but he didn't even flinch, though he did raise his eyebrow.

"What was that for?"

"For not contacting me for seven months leaving me to wonder if you were dead or not!" He sobered up and scratched his head wearily.

"I'm sorry Rose, it was getting harsh over there. We had to stay without electricity and sleep on the forest ground for a while because we were about to find the people we were looking for, so I couldn't contact you…"

"I understand Mase, I just missed you like crazy!" I breathed, hugging him again.

"I missed you too Rosi- whose the tall, scary dude standing behind you?" My eyes widened and I pulled back from his embrace, turning around. Dimitri stood, like Mason said, right behind me, looking at Mason questiongly.

"OH, sorry Mase this is Dimitri Belikov, Christian's cousin from Russia. Dimitri this is Mason Ashford from…um here?" I felt like slapping my forehead, _duh, he is from here Rose!_

"Nice to meet you Dimitri," Mason's eyes held a jealous glint in them and I knew what for. I had a hot, tall Russian standing in my living room, inside my house, making Mason think that there was something going on between us (which there wasn't) and still had a thing for me. _Awesome. _

Dimitri took the outreached hand and both men shook hard. They were staring each other in the eye, and for several moments, neither one of them let go.

"Ahem," I cleared my throat, causing the two of them to look at me and release hands.

"Dimitri is staying at my house for the wedding, I offered to let him stay here since Lissa and Christian don't have any more room at their house." He nodded and looked at Dimitri wearily.

"Dimitri, I've known Mason since we were little, he is on leave from the army for the wedding." I explained, pointing to Mason. Dimitri nodded back.

"So Mase, we were heading over to Lissa's for lunch, do you wanna stay here until then so we can catch up?" I asked smiling, still not over the fact that he was actually _here. _

"Sounds great Rose," Mason smiled warmly and agreed quickly, obviously liking the idea as much as I did.

"Rose, I'm just going to call my mother, she wanted me to call her whenever I had the chance," I placed a hand on his shoulder as Mason and I passed.

"Of course Dimitri, you can use my phone if you need too."

"Thanks Rose," he smiled at me warmly and left the room, sending tingles down my spine.

"So the Russian took my spot huh?" I looked at Mason confused, and he waited until I realized what he had just said.

"No Mase, of course not, I just met him yesterday, we are just friends." His eyes seemed to disagree with that statement as he watched me carefully. Thankfully, he dropped the subject and asked me about work.

We stayed talking well into eleven thirty, which meant that we had been talking for at least a couple hours. He had told me about his many adventures, which I in turn respond with 'ooh' and 'interesting'.

"I still don't get how you take so many pictures and each one turns out fantastic! It's like you were meant to be a photographer. I think that you should put some of your pictures in an art show. Let the public see your work of art!"

"Ha. Ha. My work is already public."

"I don't mean the models, I mean the nature, the scenery, the ones were you catch people doing things at the right moments like children laughing!" I sighed, he wouldn't understand that all the pictures I take were too meaningful to put out into the public.

"No, Mase, I'm fine with people seeing the modeling pictures, no one needs to see my free time." I told him, rolling my eyes.

"You're still just as stubborn," he muttered.

"You got that right," I smirked and glanced at the clock on the wall. "Oh! We need to get going, or we are going to be late!" I exclaimed, jumping up.

"Go get ready, I'll wait in here for you." I smiled in appreciation and took off towards my room. I gave a small shriek as I saw Dimitri sitting on my bed, camera in hand.

Racing forward, I jerked the camera from his hands. He seemed surprised at the action and was frozen in shock.

"How much did you see?" I whispered, harshly. He seemed taken aback at my tone, eyes widening an inch.

"Those are beautiful pictures Rose," he completely ignored my question, making me angrier.

"How much did you see," I snapped. He sighed in exasperation and pushed a piece of hair behind his ear.

"I was almost through them all," my eyes widened and I stared down at the picture it stopped on. I wondered if it was ironic to see the red cardinal laying on the screen the same position I captured it in last week.

I was too mad to think about what it could mean, so I just glared at him.

"You had no right to come in here and look through my camera. This is personal, no one has ever looked through it before, and neither has anyone looked through my album before, and I don't plan on anyone to do so anytime soon." I growled, placing the camera and album on the shelf behind me. "Get out of my room Dimitri, I need to get ready."

He looked like he wanted to speak, but thought better and walked out of the room. I slammed the door shut behind me and then thought over my actions.

_Its not like he meant harm. _A voice whispered in my head. _Why won't you let anybody see the real you?_

_You know why. _I growled back, barely thinking about the consequences of me going crazy.

_Because it's the last thing you have of Aunt Alberta, and photography is your passion, but it's more to it than that, why won't you let anyone in?_

_I don't want the pity, I don't want everyone's sorrow filled eyes placed on me. They are my mistakes, and after letting Jesse see one, it went all wrong, it showed that I need to keep it to myself. _No voice answered back this time, thank goodness, but I still felt like I was going crazy, talking to a voice inside of my head.

After what Jesse did though, I wasn't letting anybody see my pictures, no one. My memories and past are hidden inside that album, which I am glad that Dimitri didn't look through, seeing as it was still on the page of Aunt Albert and I.

_See, no harm done. _I groaned and hit myself in the head with a folder. Fighting the urge to talk back, I walked towards the restroom to clean off the stress of the morning.

**Sooo Mason meet Dimitri, Dimitri meet Mason, Camera meet Dimitri, Dimitri meet Rose's anger. So any ideas on what she is hiding? It connects with her Aunt and it probably something that you wouldn't expect...I hope...(: Please review, it would make me sooo happy!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hellooo everyone! I'm here with a nice longish chapter(: Thank you for all the reviews! I enjoyed them alot! There is a little something in there, though it might not be what you are thinking about(; Please enjoy!**

**Chapter 6**

Once my shower was done, I quickly changed into some of my nice clothes, being a pair of dark blue jeans and a red blouse, with red heels. I gave myself a smoky eye look and applied a little blush to my cheeks.

As I walked into my living room, I noticed that absence of voices. Were they not talking? Of course not, because they were too busy glaring at each other from different sides of the room. Why? I had no clue.

"Hey Dimitri?" I said, quickly acquiring his guilty gaze. "I'm sorry for snapping earlier, it just took me by surprise and…" I cleared my throat, not knowing what to say.

"No I'm sorry Rose, I was looking into your things without your permission and I shouldn't have." He replied softly, his eyes seemingly more guilty.

"It's in the past, but it would be nice for you to ask in the future, I wouldn't have minded to show you some of my pictures." His lips lifted in the corners and I saw relief shine in his brown eyes.

"Hey! You don't even let me see you pictures. Let alone touch your camera! I only see the ones that I'm allowed to see!" Mason exclaimed pointing dramatically at some of the pictures on the wall. I looked at them, seeing the innocence they portrayed. Most were of my friends, candid shots of them and them and even some portraits, all of them without me seeing as I was the one taking them.

"Sorry Mase, you lost that right remember." He groaned in frustration before voicing his thoughts.

"That was sophomore year of high school Rose! Come on! Why are still holding that against me?" He cried, dropping his head in his hands. I cocked an eyebrow before crossing my arms over my chest; somewhat making my boobs look even bigger.

"You shouldn't have put that picture into the art show. You know I hate when people see my pictures, unless they are for the magazine which I wasn't apart of back then." I stated, brushing a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Come on Rose! I said I was sorry!" I smirked, hidden from him since he was still covering his face.

"Not happening Mase," he groaned, before remaining quiet. I smiled, amused and turned to Dimitri who was looking between each of us, an amused expression gracing his prefect face.

_Whoa, where did that come from?_

_Well he did have a prefect face…_

_Oh shut up!_

Wow talking to myself again, I'm going to go crazy one of these days.

"Well are you ready boys?" I questioned, walking towards the doorway.

"Wow you're not taking you camera?" Mason asked surprised. I smirked at him and picked up my camera from my bag that hung around my shoulder.

"I never forget my camera Mase." I turned around and opened the door, both of them walking behind me. After I locked the door, I ushered them towards my car, feeling bad as I saw Dimitri stand beside the small car.

"I'm sorry Dimitri; my car is kind of…small." A look of concentration fell onto his face and he opened the door before shoving his large form into the backseat of the car.

Small giggles that I had been emitting turned into full out laughter as I watched him curl into himself. I was bent over from the waist, my arms wrapped tightly around it as if to keep it together, tears sprang from my eyes, and cramps threatening to kill me.

I haven't laughed like this in a long time, and it felt good to. After my laughing fit, I looked up at noticed both guys staring at me like I had gone crazy, though I could see amusement hidden deep within both of their eyes.

"What! You got to admit that was funny!" I remarked, gesturing towards Dimitri. He glared at me playfully, gesturing for me to walk towards him. I did so slowly; slightly wary of what he was going to do.

In seconds, I was squished between him and the car seat, whilst he tickled me. I was screaming and flailing my arms, trying to get out of the cramped space I was in.

"Stop! Dimitri! STOP! I…will kick…you…out of…my HOUSE!" I screeched, breathing hard as he stopped tickling me, probably scared of my threat. As I caught my breath, I felt the electricity spark from between us, a fire slowly moving up my body. We were close, very close.

And I liked it, which was a bad thing.

I scurried out of the back, composing my face in a grimace before turning back to the god in my backseat.

"Okay! I understand where you are coming from now!" I stated, throwing my hands up. He smirked at me, shrugging his shoulders. I shook my head and looked up and over the car, meeting Mason's eyes immediately…his jealous eyes.

Before I could say anything, he was inside the car, sitting in the passenger seat. I sighed before getting in myself, hearing Dimitri follow my lead from the front seat. I turned the car on and we were soon cruising down the highway towards Lissa's house.

The whole way there, Mason was glaring out the passenger side window, not even trying to talk to me. I sighed multiple times, thinking of how my happiness at seeing Mason turned into his jealously at seeing me react with another guy that I had just met.

I looked at the god in my backseat, liking the words a little too much. When I looked back though, his eyes caught mine, holding them with his dazzling intensity. I jerked my eyes back to the front, seeing that I was moving a little too close to the left. Damn him.

I pulled the car into my best friend's house, grabbing my bag and ushering Dimitri forward, though he was actually a relative of the people inside, unlike me. Mason followed behind glumly, and I told myself to talk to him before his mood affected everybody.

"Go ahead Dimitri; we will meet you up there in a few minutes." He paused, staring at me for a few seconds before nodding and walking up the driveway.

I turned towards Mason, crossing my arms. He wasn't even looking in my direction; he was staring at the road behind him. I sighed and walked towards him, placing my hand on his shoulder. He stiffened slightly and then relaxed into my touch.

"Mase, come on, don't be that way." I whispered, tugging on his shoulder to turn him around. I was unsuccessful, though I did get him to talk.

"Do you remember the promise you made me Rose?" I groaned in frustration, knowing why he was so upset know.

"Mase, I know what I promised, Dimitri is only a friend, don't think that I haven't forgotten about you just yet." He turned around shocked, searching my eyes for something. As he searched me over, I did the same for him.

He looked hot in his uniform, his red hair wispy and flying as the wind touched it softly. He blue eyes were wide and bright, filled with memories and love. He had the strong build, no doubt becoming more toned then the last time I saw him.

"But you and Dimitri," he started.

"Are only friends Mase, I just met him yesterday." He sighed, stepping forward and touching my cheek with his hand.

"I still love you Rose," he whispered, resting his forehead against mine. I closed my eyes, hiding from his strong blue ones.

"I love you too Mase, but it's not as pronounced as it was in high school, you got to understand that. Things have changed Mase, you left, and things change." I whispered back, opening my eyes. His eyes were pained but resigned.

"I know Rose, I know it was bound to happen, but no matter what I still love you." He murmured, this time closing his eyes. I didn't say anything, closing my eyes and reveling in the closeness between us.

When I opened them again, he was much closer, his eyes open and staring deeply into mine. I let him kiss me, bringing me back to my teenage years when we used to make-out like horny teenagers. His tongue asked for entrance, for which I gave and let our tongues dance for dominance. No doubt, he was a good kisser.

I pulled back and touched his cheek with my hand, smiling and pecking him on the lips once more. His arm had found my waist while we were kissing, tightly holding my body towards him, and entwining his other hand in my hair. My hand was in his hair also, but the other one was placed on his cheek.

He pulled his hand out of my hair and entwined it with the hand resting on his cheek, grazing my cheek with the backside of his hand.

"Let's go inside, I'm sure Lissa is wondering where we are…" he whispered, pulling back and throwing an arm around my shoulders, hugging me to his side. Our hands remained together as we walked towards the house, and he allowed me to rest my head on his chest.

"I really missed you Mase," he responded with a chuckle and kiss on the top of my head.

"I missed you to Rosie," he whispered playfully. I growled, smacking him in the chest.

"Way to ruin the moment, don't call me that again." I said angrily. I felt him smirk into my hair and I gripped his hair with my hand. "I mean it Mason Ashford."

"Okay! Okay Rose! I won't call you that again!" I smiled in content and let go of his hair. I heard his sigh of relief just as we came in sight of the door. Lissa stood there, bouncing on her toes, and her face brightened when she saw Mason besides me.

"Mason!" She screamed, throwing her fragile arms around his neck. I grimaced and waved at her.

"Hey Lissa, thank you for inviting me to the wedding." She smiled and nodded quickly.

"Of course!" I cleared my throat and raised an eyebrow.

"So I'm going to go home, apparently I know when I'm not wanted." I replied, turning around and taking two steps.

"Rose!" She yelled, grabbing my arms and turning me around. Her arms flew around me and I was encased in her death trap.

"Okay Liss, I was just kidding," I chuckled and smiled as she released me from her arms. She grabbed Mason and me, pulling us inside the house. She took us into the living room and I saw the rest of the group already there. Dimitri was nowhere to be found. Eddie was the first one to greet us.

"Hey Ashford! When did you get here?" He yelled, pulling Mason into a man-hug.

"Castile, my man! I got in last night." He replied grinning.

"Hey Mason," Mia smiled and hugged Eddie softly in her delicate fashion. Adrian came up next, towing a blushing Sydney behind him. I smiled at held thumbs up sign at her, which made her grimace.

Once everyone had said hi to Mason, and finally me, I asked Lissa if Dimitri had gotten her fine.

"Yeah he's in the kitchen with Christian catching up." I nodded and looked towards Mason, who was talking to Eddie about something that happened a month ago, before walking towards the kitchen. When I walked into the kitchen I instantly smell a delicious aroma coming from the oven. I made my way over to it, but a spatula got in my way.

"Not so fast Rosie, last time you did that we had to order pizza." I glared at Christian, my lip jutting out slightly.

"Just one bite!" I whined, making him smirk. I then glared at him once more, turning away and muttering profanities.

I met Dimitri's eyes and instantly smiled, seeing that he was already grinning. I then looked between the two cousins and noticed…well nothing common at all.

"I don't see any resemblance," I muttered shaking my head. I looked towards Christian and smirked, "I think you lucked out on the dominant gene though."

"Ha. Ha. Very funny Rosie." I grabbed the spatula and hit him in the head with it.

"Rose!" Lissa screeched exasperated. I looked towards her and she ran over to her fiancé. "I need him to look good for the wedding, no damages, afterwards I don't care, but for now, no more hitting him." I was pouting at her until the last part when Christian gaped at her.

"Liss! Did you just give her permission to-"I interrupted him.

"Yes, yes she did." I grinned and walked out of the room mysteriously. I heard Lissa and Dimitri laugh at my departure.

I stood in the back of the room, darkness hiding me, keeping me secret to those around me. My heart thumped as adrenaline shot through my body in leaps and bounds.

My other eye looked towards the two people that were trying to be hidden away from the others, letting me focus on the mischief that I could portray through the image. My finger twitched over the small, silver button, letting one tiny slip show them of my hiding place.

They were locked together, a small light showing me their faces, the passion that I could see perfectly, and with one tiny flash, they would break apart and attack me.

_Click._

Adrian and Sydney broke apart, staring at me as my camera flashed at them. Sydney was blushing badly, her hairs tousled at the hot make-out session she was just a part of, both their chest heaved with air as they tried to regain their breathing.

As the shock wore off though, anger seeped in. My eyes widened as they sprang at me, causing me to run down the hallway and towards the big living room that held the rest of the group. I laughed, running into the room and cowered behind Dimitri, whose large frame could cover my smaller one perfectly.

"Rose!" Adrian screamed, causing me to laugh. I heard others chuckling at the scene that must be happening before them, interrupting all their conversations.

"Come out from behind the Russian." He threatened, his voice coming closer.

"Don't hurt me, or this picture gets put onto the magazine." I replied just as threatening.

"You wouldn't."

"She would," everyone replied, smirking. I laughed, hugging my camera towards me. I love my friends.

Before I knew what was happening, the Russian God in front of me moved, grabbing my arms and pulling me in front of him. I gaped at him, before looking over at Adrian's angry face. Sydney was behind him, just as mad.

"Um, I'm just going to…run!" I screamed turning around and racing towards the back door that led to the patio. I didn't get far though, because Dimitri grabbed my arm, keeping me from going anywhere.

"Let go, or you're sleeping on the street tonight." I whispered menacingly. He gulped and let go, holding his hands up high.

"Sorry, I'm not sleeping on the street." He called, turning towards Adrian, who in turn rolled his eyes.

"Truce?" I asked smiling innocently. He took two more steps forward and I thought he was going to stop, but he charged at me, locking my arms behind my back with one hand and tickling my stomach with the other.

"Adrian! Adrian please!" I screamed, tears flooding my eyes. "Eddie do something!" Within seconds, two pairs of hands were tickling me, and I felt myself cramping up.

I pretended to scream in pain, allowing them to drop me, and closed my eyes, scrunching them up as if the pain was eating at me.

"What did we do? Rose! What's wrong?" Adrian yelled worried, shaking my shoulders. I started fake sobbing, letting the tears that had been seeping down my face be my decoy.

"Rose!" Eddie yelled, and soon enough I couldn't take their worried voices anymore and my sobs turned into hysterical laughs.

"What the- ah come one! You were faking it the whole time?" Adrian complained, rubbing his face. I smiled up at him innocently.

"That was my fun for the night." I stated grinning. Apparently, no one could contradict me because they all started laughing, even Adrian and Sydney.

"Dinner is ready!" Christian called into the room, making the noise in the room cease.

"Adrian is think we should-"

"FOOD!" I screamed, pushing through the two guys in front of me and running towards the dining room.

"-move." Eddie stated glumly from behind me. I didn't care though, I was extremely hungry, and they knew not to get in the way of that.

As I sat down at the table, waiting for the others to slowly come in. Lissa sat in the seat to the left of me and I felt Dimitri's presence to the right of me. Before he sat down though, he whispered in my ear.

"I learn new things about you every second." I shivered at his warm breath and smiled at him as he sat down.

"I'm unpredictable," I replied, fluttering my eyelashes at him. He laughed heartily and I watched as Mason sat down in front of me by Eddie. He looked between Dimitri and I but I just gave him a pointed look, making him smile, obviously remembering the kiss we shared before we came into the house.

Once I devoured as much lasagna as I could handle, which was a lot, we all sat down in the living room, me patting my full stomach.

"Hey Rose," Sydney murmured sitting down beside me. I smiled at her, before burping loudly. I giggled as Sydney's face warped with disgust.

"Sorry Syd, what do you need?" I asked her.

"I need you to come in to work at 8 tomorrow, Victor wants to talk to you." She spoke amused, "he said it was important." My eyes narrowed at her.

"How is that funny?" I questioned, leaning forward.

"It's not every day that you see Mr. Dashkov excited Rose. He is always doom and gloom." She motioned, making the faces that Victor makes at work every day. I laughed and nudged her in the shoulder.

"I like the carefree you," she blushed and looked down at her lap.

"Well tomorrow, expect me to be bossy and strict." She stated, standing up and walking over to Adrian. I shook my head at her before I felt another presence sit down beside me. Mason smiled and kissed my cheek.

"I'm guessing you got my message?" I asked him, remembering the look in threw him. He nodded, slightly wary as he looked over at the spot Dimitri was standing.

"Yeah, you just seem different when he talks to you Rose," I gave him a questioning look.

"Well believe me when I say that nothing is happening between us. Nada, zip," I throw out at him. He smiled and kissed my lips once.

"Your something else Rose," I pecked his lips once before standing up. I looked at my watch to see it was already 5 in the afternoon. "Time to go?" I nodded and walked over to where Dimitri was talking to Mia and Eddie.

"Hey Dimitri are you ready?" I asked him. He looked over at me, an awkward look in his eye, as he looked over behind me, presumably at Mason. Had he seen us kiss? What was that look for then?

"Of course Rose," he smiled and turned to say goodbye to Mia and Eddie, and I followed suit. After I hugged Liss, and tried punching Christian in the arm, but got in trouble by Lissa, Dimitri, Mason, and I were walking towards the car.

"Where are you staying Mase?" I asked him surprised that I hadn't realized this before.

"I have a reservation at the hotel on 77. It's paid for so I'm all set."

"My house is paid for too."

"But there is no room at your house, I think you need a bigger one, but I'm just saying." I laughed at his antic but nodded my head.

"Your right, I'll drop you off," I replied, turning the car on. Dimitri took his place in the back seat again, hearing us converse.

"Actually, my car is at your house." He rubbed the back of his neck, as my eyes widened.

"I didn't see it…oh." We had pulled into my driveway when I caught sight of a huge Ford Hummer resting on the other side of the street.

"Why didn't you tell me! We could have taken your hummer, Dimitri would have fit better!" I shouted, looking at the God in my backseat, who was glaring at the back of Mason's head.

"Didn't even think about, but I…um…bye!" He shouted, jumping out of the car and rushing towards his. I sighed as I watched the black hummer disappear down the street.

"Sorry Dimitri, Mason can be a… asshole at times…" I shook my head and exited the car, waiting for him to follow me towards the house.

"Its fine Rose, it reminds me of something Viktoria would do."

"Viktoria?" I asked him, confused. Was that his girlfriend or something? When I thought that I felt something heard hit my heart.

"My little sister back in Russia," I sighed in relief, before internally cursing myself since I had promised Mason.

"Oh, makes sense," I smiled and sat down on the couch, patting the space next to me. He sat down gracefully, wrapping his arm around the back of the couch.

"So do you have any brothers or sisters?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nope, unless I count the group, there are like the only family I have," I whispered, smiling at the picture of us on the wall.

He nodded and before he could ask another question, a knock rang through the house. I mean come _on_ we just got here! I lugged my body up off the couch and towards the wearily, apologizing to Dimitri before pulling the door open.

I stood in shock, staring at the red haired women in front of me.

"Mom?"

**Soo what do you think, there is a couple walls that Dimitri needs to break through to get to Rose, on eof them being Mason(; Please Review and tell me what you think! I was really excited for this chapter...:D**


	7. Chapter 7

**So this isn't my best chapter, but I wanted to get something out to you! Thanks for the reviews, though there weren't as much as I would have hoped for, the ones I got made my day! Thanks and I hope you enjoy Janine and Rose...with a little Dimitri fluff(;**

**Chapter 7**

"Rosemarie," she replied, keeping a neutral expression.

"What are you doing here?" I asked stiffly. Never once has she visited me at my house or anywhere since I moved out of the house. Maybe an email or two but they never gave away any love or emotion for me. She never called me….nothing.

"Is it a crime to visit my daughter once in a while?" She replied, placing her hands on her hips.

"Well I wouldn't know since you never do," I snarled out angrily.

"I don't like that the tone you are using with me Rosemarie." Her eyes narrowed as she glared at me, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Oh, so now you decide to be a mom? I don't think you really deserve that anymore…don't you think?" I growled out, leaning towards her.

"I'm sorry that I had to work to get money for your expenses Rosemarie, I did everything so that you had a life." I laughed at her sarcastically.

"So you think that I'm just going to bring you into a hug and call you mommy again? I worked hard for your love and you never even looked at me. All I really needed from you was you to just look at me and have a conversation with me, give me boyfriend advice or give me a hug or read me a story before I went to bed! But no, you were never home to do those type of things! When you were home you could have been with me! Not working in your office or talking on the phone!" I cried hysterically, turning away from her so that she didn't see me weak.

"Rose, I know that I wasn't the …best mom when you were young, but I just wanted you to have a good life, and with your father away doing what he does…well I had your Aunt Alberta help me raise you, I couldn't be around you all the time, and she said she would help." I closed my eyes, not wanting to open them and face her.

"Why are you here," I whispered, still looking away from her.

"Your father is missing Rose," I turned towards her quickly.

"What?" I gasped.

"He hasn't been home for a month now, and I haven't heard from him since he left. I asked all of his friends, but they said that they haven't seen him since then either." She whispered pain in her voice. If I knew Abe, he always came home, if it be a week or two weeks, he always came back. He was never gone for a month, and he always called my mom.

"I'm sure he will be back," I stated mutely.

"I haven't heard from him Rose! He could be hurt, or on the verge of death, and-"I have never seen my mother this frantic before, she was always composed and stoic.

"Mom, dad will be back soon, I'm sure your just overreacting." I tried calming her down, it scared me that she was this crazed, I guess she really loved him, and I really hated what I was about to do, though I knew I wasn't that heartless and she was my mom, though she barely showed it.

"How about you stay here until we hear more from him," I whispered. Her red hair bounced as she looked up at me, seeing as she was shorter.

"Are you sure Rose?" I forced a smile onto my face and nodded. Maybe this was a breakthrough; maybe I could finally get to know my mother, though it's still hard to get back the last years of my life. And maybe I'll get to know more things about my missing father.

"Thank you Rosie, I know you won't regret this!" I heard the double meaning in her voice, and I nodded again. She took a step forward and placed a hand on my shoulder, "I'll try."

"That's all I want," I whispered, before clearing my throat and scratching my neck. "Shit," I muttered, thinking about the man waiting for me in the living room. "Um, mom? I want you to meet someone."

I led her towards the living room, where Dimitri sat with a worried expression on his face, obviously hearing most of the conversation. He stood upon hearing my mother and held his hand out.

"Dimitri Belikov," he said and she placed her small hand in his large hand. Her face had turned expressionless again and I grimaced.

"Janine Hathaway," she stated, eyeing him and then me.

"Mom, you remember Lissa and Christian right," I asked, thinking about if I ever emailed her about them.

"Yes, I remember them, though I have yet to meet you friends Rose," she replied, I looked at her pointedly, "though that would be my fault." I nodded.

"Well they are getting married." I replied smiling. "And this is Christian's cousin Dimitri," I added.

"Oh, well that's nice," she murmured simply.

"Lissa didn't have enough room at their house so she asked if I could give Dimitri a place to stay," I told her awkwardly.

"Dimitri, my mom is going to be staying here also. Mom, you can have my bed and I'll sleep in here."

"Rose," they both chided, before stopping and looking at each other.

"I'll sleep in here, you can sleep in the one I'm in," Dimitri told me. I shook my head smiling.

"Its fine Dimitri, I'm fine in here, and you're the guest so you will be sleeping in your room and my mom can sleep in my room." I told them, glaring so that they wouldn't fight back.

"You get your stubbornness from me," my mother muttered. I rolled my eyes and turned away from her, meeting Dimitri's eyes, seeing that he was about to protest again, I held my hand up and shook my head.

"You're sleeping in the same room I put you in and that's final." I told him, turning and walking towards the kitchen. I heard him mutter something in Russian, but heard no footsteps coming after me. I grabbed a bottle of water, looking at the time and realizing that it was already 6:30. I felt the stress and excitement of the day wearing off on me and I sagged against the counter.

"I should really let you take my bed, it would ease my conscience." I heard him whisper behind me.

"But then it would be on mine," I replied, turning around. I didn't notice how close he was until I had fully turned around. I took a quick breath of air as his cologne engulfed me, it smelled perfect. I fought the urge to be closer to him.

"Well, if you are positive-"

"One hundred percent," I replied, smiling.

"She's right, you are stubborn," he murmured, making me laugh against the counter. Once I caught my breath, I noticed Dimitri looking at me with a weird emotion on his face. He reached up and brushed a piece of hair that had fallen into my face, behind my ear, making me blush.

His eyes shown with an intensity that caused chills to race down my spine; and I found myself leaning closer.

_Do you remember the promise you made me Rose? _I cringed away from Mason's words in my head, realizing what I was willing to do. I quickly moved around Dimitri and took a deep breath.

"I'm going to go to bed, it's been a long day," I whispered, without looking back at him. I all but ran towards the hallway closet, picking the sheets and pillows out from it. I moved towards the living room and made myself a bed of some sorts. My mom stood behind me, watching intently.

"Hey Rose?" She whispered, walking over to me.

"Yeah Mom," I replied, tugging the sheet into one of the crevices.

"What happened to that one boy you were dating during high school? Grayson? Jason?"

"Mason, Mom, he's here. He was here about an hour ago; we all went over to Lissa's for lunch. How did you even know we were dating?" I asked her, honestly curious at where she had uncovered that information.

"I would also ask Alberta how you were doing, I didn't want to miss one second since Kirova always had me doing one thing and another, plus your father was never around to help either." I saw a flash of pain at the mention of my missing father.

"Thank you," I whispered, finding joy that mother at least cared about me enough to keep up with my life. It actually helped me feel a little bit more loved.

"For what?" She replied, confused.

"For at least trying, though I didn't know back then." She nodded and smiled softly at me.

"I quit my job," she told me, shaking her head. "I absolutely loathed it, and I only kept going because I wanted to support you every way I could. I didn't want to rely on Abe to bring the money, it made me feel useless." She admitted.

"It paid off, thank you Mom. I'm hoping now we can try…"

"Of course," she pulled me unexpectedly into a hug and I hesitated before placing my arms around her. "I've always loved you Rosie, I just never knew how to show it."

"Don't worry Mom, we will get there, it will take time though." I told her sternly. She nodded quickly, like she was expecting it.

"Okay well I'll let you sleep, but Rose, from the looks of it, that is a great guy in there." She whispered, looking at where Dimitri was still in the kitchen.

"I barely know him," I whispered.

"And I barely knew your father," she replied back. I sighed and shook my head.

"Goodnight," I told her, lying down on the couch. I swear in the first time in my history, I heard my mom giggle. I felt like I was in some weird sci-fi episode, it felt strange talking to my mom again, and actually talking.

"Goodnight Rosemarie," and then she is back. I rolled my eyes before closing them as she walked away. My breathing started evening out and I felt the exhaustion hitting me hard before I was out.

_When did the couch become so comfortable? _I muttered to myself as I rolled over. The movement would have surely knocked me off the couch but I was still balanced and comfortable.

I opened my eyes and shot up, taking in my surrounding, which was the guest bedroom. I groaned, glaring at the door as I realized that Dimitri must have moved me into the guest room after I had fallen asleep. I growled and stalked out of the room and towards the living room, ready to yell at Dimitri, but once I got there I stopped.

Dimitri was asleep on the couch that barely fit him, sleeping peacefully. He looked beautiful when he slept, like an angel. My breath hitched and I moved towards me camera bag, which was by the door and quickly snapped a picture of him, smiling at the result.

I then grabbed another blanket and placed it over him, kissing him on the cheek.

"Thank you Dimitri," I whispered before walking towards the kitchen and seeing my mother already in there.

"I think you finally met your match Rose, he is as stubborn as you." I rolled my eyes and sat down at the table. "Do you have work today?"

"Yes I- shit! I was supposed to meet with Victor at eight and its-"

"Barely 6:30," she finished, pointing towards the clock. I gaped, shocked that I even got up that early. "You went to bed pretty early Rose; even your body has limits."

I snorted, getting up; I shot a quick look at me mom and hurried to my room to get ready. I took a shower, washing myself off with a vanilla body wash and then doing the same with my hair. I got out and blow dried my hair, waiting for my dry waves to even out before applying make-up and perfume.

I left my bathroom and found a red blouse and black slacks, concluding it with some red heels and jewelry. I saw my photo album on top of my shelf and grabbed it, deciding to hide it in my office so that no one would find it here, someone being my mom.

I walked into the living room and saw Dimitri sitting up, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. He must have heard my heels, because he looked up at me as I grimaced at him.

"Thank you Dimitri, but what I say goes, you are sleeping in the guest room tonight, and I will sleep on the couch." I told him sternly, heading towards my camera bag and placing it over my shoulder. He looked me up and down, noticing my things and outfit.

"You have work?" He asked, most likely not awake yet. I nodded towards him and grabbed my keys.

"I'll be back soon, around 6, if you need anything you and my mom have my number," I told him, walking towards the front door. He followed me, opening the door for me.

"Thank you Dimitri, I'll see you later," I whispered, before walking out the door and towards my car.

"Hey Rose?" I turn back towards him, "red looks good on you." I blush, and before I could reply, the door was shut and he was gone.

**Sooo, what do you think? Is Rose making the right decision to letting Janine into her life, where is Abe and do any of you feel any sympathy for Janine, she is a mess! And Dimitri, he is peeling away Rose's shell, and I smell some forehsadowing involving an album and work, but you never know...I could be lying! PLease review and I will update quicker next time, though I have lots of test this week...but lets hope!**


	8. Chapter 8

**So I LOVED your reviews! They were awesome and I hope this chapter is good, because I believe it is thrilling. Hot guys, wierd chats, and creepy phone calls! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 8**

"Stupid Russian, sex god, panty-dropping, good looking-"

"Wow, I never heard you use so many adjectives in a sentence before, I'm impressed." Sydney said, interrupting my mumblings. I rolled my eyes and huffed in annoyance.

It wasn't my fault that a certain someone was slipping into my mind every second, distracting me from the task in front of me.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, what are you doing here? I thought I was going to meet you down in the studio after my meeting with Victor?" I asked her confused. She shrugged, looking away from me innocently. "Oh _come on _Syd! I'm not always late!"

The look she gave me was of disbelief, making me shake my head at her.

"Yes Rose, you are," she stated like I was stupid for not knowing. I growled at her and sped up my pace, making her jog to keep up.

"Do you have any idea what Victor wants? I'm kind of coming up blank," I told her nervously, honestly afraid of Lissa's Uncle. She nodded her head smiling. "Well? What does he have to say?" I ask impatiently.

"Find out for yourself," she winked and stared ahead. I glared at her harshly, adjusting the bag on my shoulder, and straightening my red blouse out one more time.

"Rose!" Victor's excited voice exclaimed from ahead. I smiled at him sweetly, walking up and kissing his cheek.

"Hello Mr. Dashkov," I replied simply, my words causing him to frown.

"Rose, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Victor? We are practically family!" I nodded quickly, repeating my words before with his first name.

"I'm glad you got the message to meet here this morning, thank you Sydney." She smiled and nodded her. "Okay Rose how about we have this discussion in my office."

I agreed with him and followed him to his office, waving at Sydney before letting the door close behind me.

"So Rose, I have a small proposition for you." He laced his fingers together, his hair hanging loosely around his neck and his green eyes probing my facial expressions.

"What is it Victor?" I asked curiosity seeping into my voice.

"Well dear, you are the best photographer I've had here in years, and I have a few men that are willing to talk to you about selling some of your work to some art dealers around the area. I know you aren't very open to selling your designs but this is a big job Rosemarie." He grinned at me, shaking his clasped hands in front of him.

"Victor, I don't really know if I want to do this…" I trailed off, my hands hanging in the air helplessly.

"I know Hun, but at least talk to the men, something they say might…come to your interest." Something flashed in his eyes, but was gone before I could see what it was. _Am I missing something here? _ I whispered to myself in my head.

"I guess I'll talk to them, it won't hurt," I told him slowly. He clapped his hands together excitedly, honestly reminding me of Lissa.

"Thank you dear, I'm sure they won't disappoint you, or I for that matter." _I am definitely missing something…why did his smile feel so cold now? _

"Is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"Yes dear, I'm sure you are a very busy girl, I wouldn't want to keep you from your job. Thanks for your time Rose." I smiled in reply and walked out the door quickly. I stopped by my office, hiding my camera bag under my desk and picking up a pile of papers Meredith probably placed on my desk.

"Okay Syd- whoa hot guy alert," I whispered as I walked into the studio to see a man sitting in a chair by one of the sets. He looked up as I walked in and took my hand, placing a kiss on it, before smiling gorgeously at me.

"You must be Ms. Hathaway," he said, showing a perfect set of white teeth. A slight dimple appeared on his left cheek and his brown eyes glistened sharply. He was, by far, the second hottest guy on this planet; the first being Dimitri.

"It's sad that you know my name but I have yet to learn yours." I stated cheekily, watching as a laugh escaped his lips.

"My apologies, my name is Ambrose, I am your model for today's shoot." He told me, his black hair loosely brushing his neck.

"Well Ambrose, let me just grab my camera and we can get started." He nodded and walked back over to his seat. I saw some of my workers aimlessly walking around and talking to people making me growl.

"If any of you want a job in 5 minutes then I suggest you start moving, we have a busy day today! I need the beach scene set up now! Let's go people!" Everyone started to scurry around, tripping and falling over themselves so that they can stay on my good side.

"So what did Victor have to say?" Sydney asked slyly.

"You already know what he said, and yes I agreed to meet with the men, but I'm still not sure I want to give them any of my work so that art dealers can buy it." I told her, rubbing my forehead. I grabbed my large, professional camera from my safe and adjusted the settings on it quickly.

"Come on Rose, you could make so much money off of your pictures!" She exclaimed, but I simply shrugged of her comment.

"I know, but I don't want it, I'm satisfied with this," I waved around the studio and hot models. She sighed and slapped her forehead.

"Whatever," she muttered.

"Okay, move the light a little bit the right…great! Okay now I need the fan to blow his hair back and to the left…exactly…one more picture Ambrose….awesome! I got all the pictures I needed for the girls to swoon over." I smirked at him and he winked.

"That's all I asked for," he replied, making me laugh. It was ten thirty now, and my next appointment was in thirty minutes at eleven.

"Okay I need all of you to set up the bedroom scene; we have couples pictures next for the romance section." I told the staff, flipping through all of my pictures that I had just taken. I smiled at my work and nodded in approval.

"Are the women, because I will happily be the male?" Someone called over the scattering crowd. Everyone looked at me scared of my reaction and angry that the comment was even made. To their surprise however, I laughed and shook my head.

"Not in your lifetime Castile! Don't you have a girlfriend?" I asked, knowing full well that he did.

"Of course I do, but you're so hard to resist sometimes." Eddie replied, throwing an arm around my shoulders. I hit him in the chest and watched as he flinched and rubbed the spot.

"What are you doing here Eddie?" I questioned him after he stopped with his theatrics.

"Lissa wanted me to drop this by; it's some of the flower designs that she wanted you to look at." I groaned and hit myself in the head with my palm.

"Is that what I think it is?" I growled, staring at the thick binder in his hand. He smirked and dropped it into my lap.

"Of course it, have fun." I gaped as he trotted out of the room quickly, leaving me with the damn binder.

"I hate you," I growled at it, throwing it down on the ground.

"What has your smile- damn is that binder following us or something?" I laughed at Sydney, knowing that we had both been attacked with it, as was Mia. Lissa stuffed it multiple times down our noses making us sick and tired of it.

"Eddie just dropped it by," I muttered.

"Was Adrian with him?" She asked quickly, grinning like a love-sick puppy.

"No, I'm sorry Syd, it was just Eddie." She frowned and nodded quickly.

"Hey boss! You have a phone call!" I groaned and headed towards the male employee, grabbing the phone and placing it on my ear.

"Hathaway," I barked into the receiver.

"Miss Hathaway, it's a pleasure to hear your voice." A cold voice whispered into the phone. The sound made me flinch, and caused a shiver to snake down my spine.

"Who is this?" I growled.

"No need to know my name, you will find out in time." I rolled my eyes and started tapping my heel on the ground.

"Or I could never know your name and hang up on you now." I replied back harshly.

"I wouldn't do that Rosemarie, at least on your father's life you shouldn't." I froze, my heel tapping stopped as did my breathing. I was quiet, thinking over his words before whispering softly.

"My father?" I asked dumbly.

"You know daddy dearest," I winced at the name.

"What are you doing with him?" I growled, tightly holding the phone to my ear, seeing my mother's frantic face from last night in my head.

"He had something that I wanted, and he got in my way, so I decided to keep him and hold him to my advantage." His voice crept out humorlessly.

"Let him go," I whispered menacingly. I looked at my door and hurried to close it, completing isolating myself from the rest of the room.

"Now where is the fun in that?" I hissed, pulling on my hair.

"What do you want?"

"Do you happen to know where Janine Hathaway resides?" I felt myself pale at his words.

"Why do you want my mom?" I gulped, feeling myself shaking.

"Everything Rosemarie, she is the key to all of this, but knowing that you won't tell me where she is…I guess you will be second best. I want you to meet me at Cold Wood Park tonight at 7 p.m. no later. I have some prepositions for you, if you want to see you father again."

"Wait!" I yelled before a series of beeps were heard from the phone. I screamed and hit the wall that was closet to me.

Something buzzed in my pocket and I snatched my phone out of my pocket, reading the text multiple times.

_Not a word to anyone that includes the police, your mom, and your closet friends. See you soon Rosemarie._

"Rose?" My head snapped up towards the door, staring at the wood in front of me for a couple of seconds before shakily standing on my feet and opening the door.

"Rose are you alright? Your pale," Sydney remarked worried. I waved her off, the words still flying around in my head.

"I'm f-fine Sydney," I stuttered, wiping sweat off of my forehead. She didn't believe me, I could tell.

"Stop the bull crap rose, what is wrong."

"Nothing!" I growled, glaring at her, hoping that she would drop this subject. I quickly moved around her and headed towards the now made set.

My thoughts were a jumbled mess for the rest of the day. Fear was the evident emotion and I jumped at every little thing. Fear for my father also reared its head. I know my father, when he came to the house those rare times, but I knew him, and even if I never knew him, I would still be scared.

_What the hell is going on? Why is this happening? MY mom was right._

_Shit, my mom WAS right. She had a reason to be nervous, crap._

_Who the hell is this guy?_

**So who the hell is this guy? And why is Victor sound supicious? I love Ambrose though(: Please review and I promise to update soon! Maybe we can get to one hundred reviews:D ...We sure can try! Review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sooo I'm really sorry for being so late! I've had a really exciting couple of weeks and now that it's thanksgiving break I have the time to write!(: This chapter has a little...umm gore so be cautious. It was really sad writing this, but...it was needed.**

**Chapter 9**

"Are you sure that you can drive yourself home Rose?" Sydney asked for the fifth time. I sighed and grabbed my car keys.

"Yes Syd, I will see you tomorrow for work," _hopefully, _I told her. She seemed weary but didn't say any more, instead she waved as I got into my car and drove off.

As I drove home, I looked in the rearview mirror constantly, seeing if any suspicious car were trailing me. As far as I could tell, there wasn't.

When I reached the house, I looked around the neighborhood before opening the door and walking in. As I turned to lock the door, a hand landed on my shoulder. I screamed loudly, and turned, socking the person in the nose. I wasn't really seeing anything until I really focused on the voice and the face.

"Oh god, Dimitri, shit, I am so sorry," I told him, bringing my hands up to his face. Blood was dripping down his face and his eyes screamed that he was in pain.

"I'm fine Rose, are you okay?" I shook my head and stared at him wide-eyed.

"I punched you in the nose and you're asking if I'm okay?"

"Yes, because one: you look scared to death, two: you're carrying your bag like you are about to hit me with it, and three: your eyes are agreeing with me." I closed my eyes quickly before opening them smiling.

"Did your hair get longer?" I asked him, sadly trying to change the subject.

"Did your attention span get smaller?" He asked back, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm fine Dimitri," I told him, brushing by him swiftly. I heard him sigh but I ignored it. "Where's my mom?"

"She left the house to-"

"What? Where?" I exclaimed, turning towards him. He looked taken aback but replied calmly, while he stared at me warily.

"To the store to get something more things for dinner," he replied, leaning against the counter. I sighed, promising myself that she will be back.

"Oh, okay," I turned back around and walked down the hall towards my room.

"Are you going to tell me what wrong?" His voice echoed, following me down the hall.

"I told you already, nothing is wrong!" I told him, sending him a reassuring smile. A knock on the door saved me from the further questions and I raced to the door to answer it.

"Mason," I breathed as I spotted his flaming red hair. He grinned and pecked my lips once, while I stood frozen at the door. Looking at the time, I realized that it was already 6:30 and I had thirty minutes to get to a park that is 10 minutes away.

"Hey what's wrong?" He asked, brushing a piece of my hair back. I snapped back into the present and realized that he was waiting for an answer.

"Nothing Mase, but I got to go, I have a meeting with one of my associates in thirty minutes at Cold Wood Park." I told him, glancing at my watch. His eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.

"But Sydney said that you didn't have anything else to do?" He trailed off, scratching the back of his head.

"They asked me at the last minute when I was leaving in my car," I told him. He didn't seem convinced, but I kissed his cheek and grabbed my car keys.

"Okay Rose, I'll see you later." I smiled at him and nodded before walking out the front door and leaving two confused boys in my wake.

I took a deep breath before starting the car and driving towards the park. I was there fifteen minutes early, but it gave me all the more time to get myself together and control my emotions. I turned the car off and reached into the small compartment on the passenger side, pulling out a six inch knife. I kept it there for burglar reasons, or reasons like this. I slid it into my waistband of my black slacks, smoothing down my blouse and trying to lighten my breathing.

The sky was already darkening, and I stared out into the playground, looking at the deserted monkey bars. I didn't see anybody coming, so I shrieked in surprise as the door was pulled open and my arm was harshly yanked out of the car. I fell out of the car hard, landing on my dominant arm.

"Rosemarie," I recognized the voice from the phone call, it was still cold and hard, "I'm glad that you could come. Boys, pick her up. We treat ladies with respect." Cold hands grabbed my shoulders and hoisted me up, I felt my arm and it was numb, which I don't think was good.

"Respect my ass," I growled, sneering at the dark figure in front of me. The hands around forearms tightened dangerously.

"Get your hands off me," I spat, glaring at the two large men holding me. The stared straight ahead as if they hadn't heard me.

"You know I can't do that Rosemarie, don't worry this won't take long. I just want to have a little chat with you." The man whispered, taking a few steps forward.

"Where is my father?" I growled out. I cried in pain as he slapped me across the face.

"I'm talking, you're not," he sneered.

"I won't listen unless you tell me wher- ahh!" I screamed as he slapped me on the other cheek with more force, making my head snap to the right. I tasted the salty taste of my blood as I turned back towards him.

"Finished?" He asked calmly. I just continued glaring at him, spitting out some of the blood in my mouth. "Anyways, my proposition to you is…bring me your mother and I'll give you your father."

"What kind of proposition is that! I'm not going to give you my mother!" I exclaimed, my breathing becoming labored.

"I think you are, you see…your mother and I used to be a thing in high school, until she met your father and cheated on me with him. I let it go, seeing as she said it was a mistake, that was until, she became pregnant with you." He whispered, tilting his head to the side.

"So blame me not her; it has nothing to do with my mother or my father, so leave them out of this and let my dad go." I told him, trying to be calmly. I just realized what I had just done, I had just gave myself up to this guy in return for my parents safety, but I didn't feel very heroic, I felt terrified.

"That seems like a lovely offer, seeing as you do look absolutely ravishing. Has anyone ever told you that red is your color?" I shivered in disgust, scared as I realized how strongly he was taking my words.

His words also reminded me of Dimitri, of him telling me these same words this morning. _What are you doing Rose? _

"I might just take you up on that offer but first, I think I want a little taste before I agree." My eyes widened as he motioned for the guys holding my arms to follow him. Tears starting to form as I realized what he meant.

_How did this happen? _I cried to myself in my head. I started struggling as they walked darker and darker into the park. Cries started escaping my mouth and I started kicking.

"Shut her up," the man snapped. Instantly, a large hand covered my mouth and I was no larger walking but being carried by my legs. I screamed against the hand, and struggled against the arms, but it was to no use.

I felt them stop, but I couldn't see anything, especially through the thick tears that were streaming down my face. _What did I do to deserve this, please someone help me! _I wished for my inner cries to be heard, but I knew they weren't.

"Now Rosemarie, be a good girl and this would go by fast. Remember…you were the one that mentioned this." I felt his hand trail my face and the hand over my mouth disappeared.

"Who are you," I whimpered.

"Most call me Nathan," he replied, before he told the men to set me down softly, as so they don't ruin my perfect body. I shuttered, and scooted away once they let me down. Nathan grabbed my hair and pulled me forwards.

"Not so fast Rosemarie," he shoved me onto the cold ground and fell on top of me. I started sobbing as I felt his hands grope my chest, before I felt him slap me and picked my shoulders up before slamming them back onto the ground. My head pounded as it landed hard on a rock, I could see stars and I glazed off. I felt his him laugh before picking up the hem of my shirt. I knew he had found the knife, because he laughed and pulled it out.

"You shouldn't have brought this with you Rosemarie, it isn't good." I was barely hearing him though, my head still pounding, but I did feel when the tip of the knife cut into my face, starting at my forehead and moving down. I cried in pain, feeling the blood fill on my face.

His hands continued moving and I felt him pull my shirt off and I started clawing at his face. I annoyed him this time though, because he picked my head up and slammed it harder into the ground. The pain got so worse that I felt myself drifting out.

"Rose! Rose!" A voice called in the distance. I heard Nathan curse before getting up.

"I'll be back Rosemarie." Nathan stated coldly.

"Leave… my… parents…alone-" I gasped, my eyes closing.

"Your mom will be left alone, you are what I want now Rose. You left me wanting more….as for your father, I'll consider letting him go, as long as you do what I say. Goodbye Rosemarie," then he was gone.

"Rose! Rose!" The voices were still calling, but I didn't have the energy to answer them. I felt myself losing consciousness quickly. Right before I became unconscious though, I heard Dimitri's sigh of relief and his arms picking me up.

"It's been three days; shouldn't she be awake by now?"

"It's taking her time to heal Janine, we have to be patient."

"I can't believe my baby was almost raped, who would do something as god-awful as that."

_Almost raped…._

_Almost raped…._

_Almost raped….._

These were the words that I woke up to. The words that sent my body into shock and kept me from answering the whispers of my friends and family.

I stayed silent, it could have been for hours or even days, but the only thoughts left in my head were repeats of the scenes playing over and over again in my head. His hands roaming my skin, the knife cutting through the skin on my face, his hands groping skin that should never be touched; it sent me into hysterics, I felt disgusted in myself, I covered myself with covers, hiding myself from the outside world.

I knew that they knew I was awake but I didn't want them to see me like this…weak, dirty, ugly.

I didn't know what day it was now, but I heard the door open again. This time, they didn't speak. Their soft footsteps walked straight up to the bed and pulled the covers right off of me. I whimpered and cowered inside of myself, wrapping my arms around my legs and shielding my face with my hair.

"Rose, please don't hide from me," Dimitri whispered, laying his hand on my shoulder. I shivered away from his touch He sighed before I heard him start muttering to himself.

"If I only would have gotten there sooner," my quick intake of breath alerted him that I was listening. Thinking over my actions, I decided to turn towards him.

Somehow something inside me let me trust Dimitri; something in his voice told me he didn't care how I looked. I opened my eyes and stared at him hauntingly.

"It's not your fault," I croaked, my voice weak and fragile. Shakily, I reached out and grasped his hand; I squeezed it with as much strength as I could muster. I don't know what it was with Dimitri, but I felt myself wanting to tell him everything. He smiled in relief, and placed his other hand over mine, picking them up to his lips and placing a short kiss there.

"I should have found you sooner; I should have known something was wrong the first second you walked out of the door." His voice was pained.

"Shh," I whispered, tears forming in my eyes.

We sat in silence for a few seconds before he chuckled emotionlessly.

"I thought I was the one to be comforting you?" He whispered, kissing my hand again. I pulled on his hand, begging him with my eyes to come closer. He got up and sat down on the bed, pulling me close to him.

"Talk to me Rose," he whispered as I closed my eyes shut.

"I'm scared, I'm so scared," I whispered, a few tears escaping my eyes. His hold tightened and I felt myself start shaking with sobs.

"What happened Roza?" The name soothed me, though I have never heard him say it before. I placed my head on his solid chest, breathing hard and shaking.

"I can't….I can't," I whimpered, my voice weak as the images forced their way into my head. The same words were being repeated as my sobs became harder and harder.

"Shhh Roza, its okay, its okay. You don't have to say anything else, its fine." My breathing became smoother and less harsh as his hand ran down my hair and back, brushing my hair and massaging my back.

"How bad is it?" I whispered when I felt controlled. I felt his confusion so I leaned my head back and let my hand brush my cheek, feeling the jagged, raised skin. Tears filled my vision once again and I hid my face in his chest.

In seconds, his fingers were coaxing my chin up, making me meet his warm brown eyes. Once he knew that I wasn't going to look down, he removed his fingers and traced the skin on my cheek.

"You're beautiful Roza, no matter what scars you receive." His words reassured me, touched a part of me that pushed the tips of mouth up into a small smile. He continued tracing the scar as I closed my eyes, which was the worst thing that I should have done.

_I felt his hand trail my face…..I felt his hands grope my chest…and I felt him pull my shirt off. _I screamed, clawing at Nathan, trying to free myself from his sickening hold. Pure fear raced through me, scared of what he was about to do…

But it stopped, Nathan's voice changed into a different one, a Russian one.

"Roza, Roza, you're not there anymore, you're here, with me, safe, you're safe." I opened my eyes and found his scared, terrified ones, holding my face. I fell into him, my whole body shaking with terrified sobs.

He comforted me, holding me to him as I sobbed into his shirt; completely soaking it.

"Why are you here?" I asked him, releasing my grip on his shirt. He stared down at me worried, but brushing my hair back away from his face.

"I worry about you Rose, I want to make sure you are okay, I care about you a lot Rose, you're an amazing person and to see you like this pains me, I want to help you, if you will let me." He whispered, staring deeply into my eyes. I sucked in a breath, biting my lip as I stared up at him.

"Just being her is enough for me, thank you," he smiled and pulled me back into a hug. We stayed there for a while, relishing in each other's company. He pulled back though and looked at me, his eyes going serious.

"Everyone is here; do you want to see them? You don't have to if you don't want to…" I thought it over for a few minutes before nodding my head slowly.

"Just…don't let me go okay?" I whispered, wrapping my arms around him more. He nodded against my head and whispered a 'of course Roza' before helping me stand up. He kept one arm around my shoulders and the other one was gripping my hand. I had my arm that wasn't connected with his around his torso with my head resting on his chest.

He walked us out my bedroom and towards my living room where I knew everyone was. I closed my eyes and shook my hair so it covered the scar on my right cheek. It was completely quiet when we walked in, which made me slightly self-conscious.

"Rose?" The soft voice reminded me of the reason that I was put though this torture. I opened my eyes and stared at my mom, my eyes running over her whole body making sure that she was okay.

"Mom," I whispered softly, almost inaudibly. She smiled and hugged me softly, testing me.

"I'm so glad you are okay," she whispered, "but Rose, who did this to you?"

Automatically, I cringed in Dimitri, scared of the question, scared of the answer. I didn't see but I felt Dimitri shaking his head at her, warning her not to go any farther.

"Sorry," she whispered, backing up a few steps. I breathed in deeply as Dimitri whispered soothing words into my ear. Time like this I wished I wasn't so weak, I wanted to tell them but something held me back.

_I hate you Nathan; you made me feel weak, ugly, scared. _

But I remembered what he said, that if I did what he said then he would free my father, so I couldn't tell them, anyone. I had to find strength, courage, I couldn't see my mother weak again, she needed my father and I will do anything to get him back for her, even if that means…surrender my body to the devil.

I lifted my head, meeting Dimitri's eyes. He seemed shocked by what he saw and just stared at me. I looked around the room, looking into everyone's eyes, searching for one pair that seemed missing.

"Where's Mason?"

**Time to hide...it was part of the story plot i'm sorry, I hope this keeps you on your toes and please review! I almost hit 100 but maybe this time 125? (*o*)_/ :D Tell me what you think, and any ideas where Mason is?...Maybe I shouldnt ask that question...but it brough Dimitri and Rose closer together...{: Review and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I can't belive all of the reviews that I got for the last chapter! It made me so excited! I set 125 as my goal and you all came close and I could have waited but I was so happy that I typed up another chapter last night and decided to post it now(: Please enjoy(:**

**Chapter 10**

There's a deafening silence in the room as I waited for someone to answer me. The silence was making my muscles tighten in suspense, and my eyes widen greatly. When nobody answered me, I turned my eyes to the large man beside me.

"Rose…" he trailed off, eyes trailed on the carpet, "how about you sit down."

"No, just tell me Dimitri," I snapped, yanking my arm away from his grasp. Upon doing this, I felt a soreness seep into my arm. I flinched slightly and looked down at it, seeing a light bruising on my forearm.

"Your arm isn't broken but it will be sore from falling on it." Dimitri told me, running his fingers over the bruise softly. I gulped loudly before finally sliding my eyes from the marks and towards the ceiling.

"Where is he Dimitri, please just tell me." I whispered, never taking my eyes away from the ceiling. I heard him sigh softly; trying to think about what he was going to say before motioning me to take my eyes off the ceiling.

"When you left the house, Mason knew that something was wrong, so we decided to follow you." he took in my reaction, but I just stared at him emotionlessly. "When you stopped at the park, we parked a couple streets down and got out to move where you were. By the time we got there however, you were gone. We saw another car in the lot, and thinking that that was your 'associate' we trailed after you."

He took a deep breath, as did I, my thought trailing back to the events that happened. He continued finally, reaching forwards and grabbing my hand unconsciously. I needed that hand just as much as he did and tightened my hold on it.

"We saw the men, carrying you, trying to quiet your screams, and we saw them throw you on the ground, behind a bush. By this time, Mason was telling me to call the police, which I did, and he then tried to sneak up on the two men.

"I watched as he was caught and…and he was beaten thoroughly. I ran forward to help and managed to knock one of the unconscious. I called your name and saw another guy get up from the spot that he had you and run off with the other guy on his tail. I would have run after them, but I couldn't leave you there, or leave Mason there." He finished, catching my waist as I started to fall towards the ground.

Tears streamed down my face, thinking about the pain that Mason could be in at this moment. If he was alive…I tried to quiet my sobbing, trying to get the words out.

"I-Is he-he ali-ve?" I stuttered, gripping his hand even tighter. Dimitri grimaced and grabbed onto my shoulder, rubbing soothing circles into my muscle with his thumb.

"He is currently at the hospital and is in critical condition as we speak," Dimitri whispered. I choked on something in my throat, maybe saliva, maybe even my heart, but it hurt. I looked around the room, hoping that this would just fade away and I would be taking some shots for the next magazine, but it never happened, I was still in a weak, torn, dirty body, with one of my best friends in the hospital because of me.

"This is my fault," I whispered, wiping tears from my eyes, only for them to be replaced by more. Dimitri looked stunned by my outburst and made me look at him in the eye.

"None of this is your fault Rose, don't even think like that," he stated, tightening his hold on me. I shook him off though, taking one more look around the room before turning and walking back to my room. Dimitri tried calling me back but I ignored him and locked the door behind me.

I started getting ready, trying to avoid the sore spots, and walked towards the bathroom to clean myself up more. As I walked into the bathroom, I looked up and gasped.

"Oh my god," I whispered, tears once again forming in my eyes. My fingers trailed the long, red scar. I looked at the ragged cut, the red skin irritated and puffy; it ran from my right eye down towards my chin harshly. My eyes wouldn't look away, and my mind couldn't look away from the mark that Nathan left with me.

Scratches and bruises littered the rest of my face, but I knew that those would go away. The scar would stay there forever though. I splashed water on my face and tried to brush a little powder on my face though it helped little. I brushed my teeth and my hair before grabbing my keys and walking back into the living room.

"Wait! Rose, where are you going?" My mom exclaimed, scrambling to get up from her spot on the couch. I shook my head at her, making her pause.

"I'm going to the hospital, I need to see him," I told her, giving her a stern look before she could reply. I walked out the door quickly, slipping into my car and turning it on. Before I could back out though, someone knocked on the passenger window. I sighed before rolling it down for her.

"Can I come with you Rose," she whispered, worry shining in her eyes. I thought about it, believing that she wouldn't ask questions, and let her in.

I was driving for some time before Lissa started talking.

"Will you tell me what happened Rose?" I froze, closing my eyes for a quick second before opening them and staring straight ahead.

"Don't Liss; please just don't make me remember…" I shivered in disgust and pulled into the hospitals parking lot. We sat in silence for a minute until she whispered a sorry and got out. I followed suit and we walked into the entrance calmly.

"Miss? Can you point us towards the room that keeps Mason Ashford?" I asked the receptionist behind the counter. She looked bored and was chewing her bubble gum obnoxiously.

"101," she stated before returning to her game of pinball. My anxiety started coming back as I nearly ran towards his door. I burst through it quickly, scaring a doctor who was in the middle of checking him. My eyes widened as I started at his beaten body.

Both of his eyes were swollen shut, cuts and bruises were scattered around his whole body, and his right arm was in a sling. I took a shaky step forward, reaching out towards him before I pulled back. Turning towards the doctor, who was currently staring at me worried, I looked at his name tag and read 'Dr. Lance'.

"Is he okay?" I asked him quickly. I listened to the heart monitor and it seemed a little too fast, but I was unsure of all the medical instruments that doctors use.

"Is he…recovering? It will take a few weeks before he can function probably and his arm will be in a cast for little over a month, but he will live." Doctor Lance smiled reassuringly at me, and then wrote a couple more things on his clipboard.

"So he will live?" I whispered, staring at the beaten body.

"He will live, though we did have a scare when his heart stopped working, but by some miracle…it came back and he recovering as we speak." My breath had hitched when he said that Mason's heart had stopped, but I let it out when he said that he was recovering.

_Recovering…see Rose nothing to worry about._ I whispered to myself in my head. But there were loads to worry about, what he actually came after my friends? My family? What if he actually…killed them?

I felt myself hyperventilating as the thoughts grew more rapid and strong. I was scaring myself more than Nathan could at the moment.

"Rose, calm down, he's fine." Lissa whispered, rubbing my arm soothingly.

"But Liss, what if he comes after you…or Christian? He could be following me right now!" I whispered frenetically. Her eyes started widening as I talked, but she grabbed my arm before I could say any more.

"Rose, you are scaring yourself. Your letting your thoughts runs wild and it's not good." Lissa whispered, moving me to a chair.

"Is everything okay?" Doctor Lance asked worried. I could reply, but I heard Lissa give some sort of reply that I didn't hear. I didn't know he was gone until Lissa started talking louder.

"Rose we can help you, we are your friends. Can you just tell me what happened? Please," she asked, holding my hand in her petite one.

"I-I can't," I whispered, pulling on my hair. "I don't want to relive what he did to me. He almost…he almost…." I couldn't even finish the sentence.

"I know Rose, but you can trust me. I will be here the whole time, I won't let your hand go and I promise that you won't have to say it again, but Rose it's me, only me." She whispered smoothly, smoothing my hair down calmly. I looked at her in the eye, searching, for what I didn't know.

"I got a phone call at work; I didn't know who it was. They said that…they said that they had my dad. He had gone missing weeks ago and that's why my mom is at my house, she was worried. The guy said that I had to meet him at Cold Wood Park, or he would hurt my dad.

"I wasn't focused the rest of the day, and when I got back to the house, I was jumpy and scared, and I gave Dimitri a broken nose. He was worried but I couldn't tell him, I couldn't tell anybody. Mason showed up but I told him that I was meeting an associate at Cold Wood Park. I don't know why I told him the name, I guess so they knew where I was, but I was glad that I did.

"I drove to the park and when I got there it was already turning dark. I found a knife in the compartment on the passenger side and hid it in the waist band of my pants. The next second…two men were pulling me out of the car and making me face another f-figure who was hidden by s-shadows." I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to continue on, but I felt Lissa squeeze my hand in strength.

"He said that he dated my mom in high school and that one night she cheated on him with my dad, but he forgave her, until I showed up in the picture." I whispered, my voice shaking harder.

"He wanted my mom in turn for my father," I cried, pulling at my hair with my free hand. I heard Lissa gasp, shocked at the deal that was made.

"I couldn't do it….I couldn't just give my mom for my dad! It wasn't right, it was horrible!" I sobbed, bringing my knees up to my chest. Lissa whispered in my ear 'I understand' and 'that's horrible', so I decided to tell her the worst part. "So I told him that he could have me instead."

"Rose!" Lissa gasped, startled. It was hard to breathe as I sobbed, but I couldn't stop the words that were easily flowing from my mouth.

"I said it was my fault that they couldn't be together, not my mom's fault, but mine. I told him not to hurt and to leave her out of this. He didn't know if he wanted to take me up on his offer, and I realized what he really wanted and I made the mistake of giving him myself. I started getting scared, I wanted to take everything back, but it was too late, I gave him the idea and he decided that he would have a 'taste' before he took me up on my offer.

"His men grabbed me and started making me follow the guy, and I screamed and kicked until they covered my mouth and grabbed my legs. I was useless, I was weak, and I was terrified! I wanted to leave; I wanted to take back my offer. I didn't want my body to turn into a dirty, cheap trash.

"I knew he was going to rape me, and nothing I did was working. The men threw me on the ground behind a bush, numbing my arm. I tried to get away but he grabbed me and fell on top of me. As I started sobbing, he shoved my head into the ground to shut me up.

"He started to pull my shirt up and he found the knife. He slid it down my face, leaving me with a scar that will stay with me forever, a little piece of him. He then took my shirt off and annoyed him so he made me hit my head again and I felt myself losing. I was letting him win. I was going unconscious and when I did he could have his way with me. I was terrified, and I was….I was giving up." The pictures were clear in my head, making my head dizzy and light. I think someone was calling my head but I was lost in the images, letting them scar into my brain and remind me that I am weak and dirty, and he will be back.

"Rose, you are not there. Listen to me, listen to my voice, I am squeezing your hand? Do you feel that, come on Hun, you are here." I blinked, gasping and shaking horribly. She sighed in relief and engulfed me in a hug.

"I'm so sorry Rose; I never wanted any of this to happen to you. You are the strongest person I know; it wouldn't be possible for me to be standing where you are right now after this happening to me not only two days ago. Rose, don't think that because he knocked you out that you are weak and dirty. You are everything but." Lissa told me, eyes fierce and gaze unwavering. I quivered more, feeling his touch on my skin.

"I still see the images Liss; I still feel his grimy hands on my body. They won't go away," I cried, covering my body more with my coat, though it didn't make any difference.

"Can you tell me who it is Rose?" I closed my eyes, biting my lip so hard that I felt blood seep through.

"Nathan, his name was Nathan," I replied, the name bringing the images to the forefront of my mind. I felt myself start to shake more, but realized that it wasn't me that was shaking but my phone in my pocket. I grabbed it and read the text on the screen.

_Now Rosemarie that was a bad move on your part._

My breathing turned ragged as I searched the room, trying to find him. How could he have heard that conversation? He _is _following me; I didn't even know where to look.

The door handle turned and I braced myself for him to come strolling through the doors ready to finish what he started, but Doctor Lance was the only one that walked in with a small smile on his face.

"Sorry, one of the nurses said that they forgot to tell me to give him some morphine. Let me inject this in and I will be out of your hair for the rest of the day." He told us smiling. We watched as he inserted the medicine and we could see the instant effect.

"Is that supposed to be happening?" I asked hurriedly as his heart rate started speeding up. The doctor looked frazzled until he started checking all of the readings.

"What is happening? This shouldn't be happening! I need all Doctors to come to room 101 immediately. I repeat room 101." Soon a lot of Doctors were filing into the room and running around. Doctor Lance walked up to us and told us that we had to go.

"NO! What's going on! What's happening to him?" I cried, trying to push past his arms as he walked us out.

"We will send someone to inform you after we take care of this, please go wait in the waiting room." I looked helplessly as the swarming doctors and him before nodding and walking towards the waiting room with Lissa.

Thirty minutes later, Doctor Lance walked into the waiting room looking sullen. He walked straight towards us and bent down so that he was eye level with both of us.

"I'm sorry ladies, but someone had changed the morphine with another dangerous liquid that we only use with the most critical of patients when we see they are not going to live. I'm sorry to inform you that Mr. Ashford did not make it through, we lost him almost immediately."

I sat there in shock, tears running down my face as he told us the news. Lissa's mirrored mine and we gripped each other's hands tightly. I felt another vibration from my phone and flipped it open slowly.

_See Rosemarie, now his death is on your shoulders. You play by my rules or people around you will get hurt. See you soon._

**Soo, don't kill me, pleaseee I hate Nathan too, blame him, not me...or at least try too? :/ Please review I would love them alott! If you have any questions so far just post them in a review and I will get back to you!(:**


	11. Chapter 11

***Running from mob***

**"Dimitri tell them to quit chasing me!"**

**Dimitri: "Just tell them that you don't own Vampire Academy only the characters that you made up!"**

**Me: "But-"**

**Dimitri: "Do it."**

**Me: "Fine! I don't own Vampire Academy, that all belongs to Richelle Mead! I only own the characters that I made up!" **

***Mob disappears***

**Me: "Thank You- AHHH!"**

***New mob appears***

**Me: "What do they want?"**

**Dimitri: "Those are the people that have been waiting for you to update. I'm not helping you this time."**

**Me: "WHAT? WHY NOT!"**

**Dimitri: "You left on a cliff hanger and now I don't know how Rose is!"**

**Me: "I'm sorry!"**

**Dimitri: "Good luck" *Disappears from sight* "UGHHH!"**

**Always wanted to do one of those, but I am truly sorry for leaving you guys hanging. I know that you didn't want him to die and I'm sorry but I needed to. This isn't a long chapter because I should be doing homework right now...but I wanted to give you something.I hope this chapter satisfies you(: Enjoy!**

**Chapter 11**

I stared at my ceiling, watching the fan circle around and around continuously in circles. I was zoning in and out of thoughts, zoning in when they sucked me in and zoning out when they were too much to bear.

Nathan's message continued to be the center of my thought, everything centered on it.

I hadn't moved for days, maybe even weeks, I wasn't keeping track. I just wanted to die, kill myself, free myself from the guilt that tore at my heart every second. _It's my fault, Mason is dead because of me. I might as well just stabbed him in the heart myself._

I didn't always feel like this though, when I first woke up after the day in the hospital, all I felt was denial. _He couldn't be dead, this is all a stupid nightmare that I will wake up from. _Days passed before those thoughts passed and then pain set in.

I sobbed daily, pain wracking my whole body. I yelled for Mason to come back, screamed at anybody who would try to comfort me or touch me, because I only wanted Mason to do that.

I locked my door, not allowing anybody into my room. Now I just lie on my bed, with guilt chewing away my insides. They tried to feed me, but if Mason couldn't eat then I wouldn't either. They tried to get fluids into my system, but the same words came out of my mouth.

I was empty of life, I was no longer Rosemarie Hathaway, I was the skeleton of her. I remembered Aunt Alberta, and couldn't help comparing this pain to the pain of losing her. It felt worse, seeing as I could have stopped myself from telling Lissa what happened, the accident with Aunt Alberta…I couldn't have helped her.

I heard the conversations around me, our outside of my room. I remember one conversation that Lissa had with her Uncle, talking to him about work.

**Flashback**

_"Hi Uncle Victor…."_

_"Yes it's me Lissa…"_

_"No, no, no, I need to tell you that Rose won't be coming to work for a while…"_

_"No Uncle, she is having a hard time right now, we all are…"_

_"Do you remember that soldier that you met during Christmas time a last year? It was Rose boyfriend…"_

_"Yes Mason, he recently died from an accident…."_

_"No not in war, he was visiting here, but he died after being admitted into the hospital…"_

_"That's why I called, Rose is, well, traumatized right now, I don't know when she will be willing to go back to work…"_

_"Thank you Uncle, a break is exactly what she needs…."_

**End Flashback**

_War…_it would have been easier to deal with…he would have died with honor, not by my hands. Of course it still would have been horrible, but less than how it feels now.

I could have been staring at the ceiling only for about an hour when someone knocked on my door again. Lissa, my mom, mostly everybody has tried to get into my room, Dimitri included, but I didn't want to see anybody right now.

"Hey Rose, can I come in?" Except Christian, I sighed and didn't answer him. I continued to stare up at the ceiling, trying to ignore his calls. I should have listened to his words though because soon I heard him banging on it, trying to break in.

After days of lying down, I sat up, my back and neck as stiff as boards, and stared at my door in fright. I knew it was going to break soon enough, and I didn't want him seeing me weak and like a skeleton. I scampered off the bed and secured myself against the wall behind my bed.

The banging continued but I also heard my door creaking in protest. I pulled my legs up to my chest and rested my head on them, allowing my hair to cover me. A loud crash made me jump and scamper further into the wall.

"Rose?" My head snapped up, I though Christian was banging on my door. I heard Dimitri's large footsteps enter my room and I knew he could see me from where he was.

He walked closer to me, and I felt myself becoming trapped by his presence. I felt him kneel in front of me and seconds later, his hands were resting on my arms. I slowly looked up at him, my hair covering my face still, but I could see him through it.

He took his hands off of my arms so that he could brush my hair back. He stared at me in the eyes, searching. I could see my reflection through his dark eyes and saw that my eyes looked hollow and empty, my face sunk in, and my lips were chapped and bleeding.

"Rose," he whispered, shaking his head. Tears starting forming in my eyes and he enveloped me in his arms, falling back so that his back fell against my bed. I was cradled in his arms, crying hard and loud. Words escaped my mouth, I didn't know what I said until Dimitri answered me though.

"It isn't your fault Rose," he murmured against my hair.

"Yes…yes-s it is," I cried, clutching his shirt I my hands.

"How Rose how?" I shook my head vigorously.

"I can't…I can't," I said.

"You told Lissa what happened, can you please tell me?" I shook my head again.

"She can't tell anyone, she can't, she can't…"

"Shh Rose, I won't push you, but I want to help you. Loosing Mason is going to be hard to deal with, and you cant do it by yourself. You have friends out there willing to help you get your life back-"

"My life will never be mine again!" I yelled at him, sobbing.

"It won't be the same, no, but you will recover from this blow…"

"No I won't," I whispered.

"Rose…we'll talk about this later. Will you please come out of your room? You need to eat and get fluids into you." I hesitated, freezing his arms.

"Okay," I replied uneasily. He started to stand up, me in his arms, and he started walking towards the door. I closed my eyes and turned my head into his chest. His grip tightened in reassurance and I heard the hum of voices coming from my living room stop.

"Thank god," I heard my mom whisper. I felt her hand touch my cheek, but I flinched away from her quickly. I looked up at her, seeing her worried face.

I looked away from her and searched the faces for Lissa. I found her, staring at her in question. She stood up and walked towards me.

"I haven't told them Rose, but you need to."

"No! No I can't, we can't," I reached forward and grabbed her arm, but seeing as I was so weak from lack of food and sleep, I could keep my grip on her arm.

"Bad things will happen if we say anything," I whispered hoarsely. She looked up at Dimitri and then back to me, tears filling her eyes.

"I'm so sorry Rose, I'm so sorry that you had to go through all of this. She grabbed my hand and spread it out, my arm spread between us. She pushed my long sleeve shirt up and stared down at it. Somehow I knew what she was searching for.

"NO!" I screamed, wrenching my hand out of her grasp and stumbling out of Dimitri's grasp. "Where is it, why did you look!"

"I'm sorry Rose, I really am, but I'm glad I did." She whispered, pulling my album out from behind her. I grabbed it from her and searched through it hastily, trying to find the pictures.

"Where are they?" I cried.

"It's unhealthy to keep these Rose, why did you do this to yourself?" I stared at the pictures that my mother held, the first one shoving me right in the gut.

"She died, I wasn't in the right state of mind, I did it and then I took pictures of it." I told her sharply.

"But why didn't you throw them away, why did you keep them." She asked, slamming them down on the table.

"Because they are a part of me! They remind me of the pain that I endured when Aunt Alberta died! They reminded me that it was my fault!" I screamed, my breathing was becoming more ragged but I ignored it.

"You should have come to me, not cut yourself," she growled.

"You were never there! I was always by myself with the new nanny! You were always gone until now, dad was always gone, and now Nathan has him and-" I threw my hand over my mouth.

"Nathan?" She asked slowly.

"Rose?" I was starting to shake harder and it becoming hard to breath. I felt hands touching me and my vision started darkening. I started seeing Nathan, his dark eyes laughing at my weakness, his hands groping my body as I cried helplessly.

"Get off me!" I screamed, throwing my arms around to shake him off. "No! No!"

"Rose," Nathan whispered in my ear. I flinched away from him harshly, falling to floor and trying to get away from him. He grabbed my arms and pulled me up shaking me.

"She's having a panic attack…Rose? Rose calm down your safe," I tried breathe in but it felt like a weight was weighing down on my chest. Stars danced in front of my eyes and I felt myself losing consciousness.

"Rose, stay awake, I think she's about to pass out!" Someone called, the voice calmed me, it was Dimitri's voice, his arms were around me, not Nathans. I couldn't stay awake though, darkness filled my vision and then I was gone.

**:( Poor Rose...will she ever recover? The more reviews the more quickly she might. Especially with Dimitri's help(; Please review and after this week I will be free for Winter break(: Until then...**


	12. Chapter 12

**YAYY! Christmas break! More time to write and longer chapters!(: This is like a changing point I think(: Please enjoy!**

Chapter 12

Life. A story that is written by you; a song that cracks with breaks or narrows with anger. It's a deck of cards that is handed to you; and this time I'm pretty sure that I got the worse hand.

Well of course not the worse, seeing as some people die young or live on the streets, but I'm pretty low down there. I'm not lower then Mason, the person who gave his life for mine, paid the price for my mistake. Some people like him are dealt with cards that give you the wrong friends.

I should have stayed how I was those ten years ago…by myself. It would have been easier on the people around me and myself; even Aunt Alberta, my only friend as a child, leaves me. I think it was a sign, telling me to stay away from people, from people that I could hurt.

I could tell that I was hurting the people around me now, but this time by not waking up. I didn't want to wake up. My secret that I had kept to myself for over ten years is out in the open for my friends and family to see how weak I am.

My blood, dripping down my arm intensely, in the picture is a part of me. I didn't want to get rid of it, it reminds me of the pain that I was going through; it reminded me that Aunt Alberta was real.

The photo was gruesome, horrible, something that a crazy person would have done; which is solely the reason why I hid it from others. I'm not crazy…I think.

A panic attack…that's what they said happened to me. I just remembered Nathan's hands grabbing me, and my mother's angry and disgusted face. I could actually feel the heat of his breath as he whispered into my ear. I knew Nathan was nowhere near me, which gives me the knowledge that I could actually be going crazy.

A strong, vile taste was forming in my throat, gagging me. Instantly my eyes opened and I emptied the contents of my stomach all over the carpet of my room. I felt warm hands holding my hair back as he whispered soothing words into my ear. I thought that he would be gone already, back to Russia and away from me; the crazy girl who was almost raped and has pictures of me cutting myself from ten years ago.

I would have left myself…

Once I was done, I pulled back and groaned, feeling his hands helping me lay down. I looked up at him as he brushed my hair off my face which was coated in sweat.

"Don't worry Roza, I'll clean it up," he murmured, making no move to get up at his words.

"No, you don't have to clean up my puke, I'll do it," I told him weakly, trying to heave myself up. His hand touched my shoulder though and gently tapped me back down. His touch was so soft, but I was so weak that it felt like he was using all his weight to push me down.

"I said don't sorry, I had to do it all the time when my sisters were sick." Dimitri replied smiling slightly. I sighed, knowing I wasn't going to win, especially because I couldn't get up. When he saw my body drop in defeat he got up and left the room, quickly returning with a bunch of paper towels and a glass of water to scrub out the remaining bits and then a scrub.

I watched as he cleaned my throw-up, seeing that he wasn't getting disgusted. After he was done, he sprayed some orange freshener that released the room of the smell of puke. He came back and sat down on the bed, resting his hand on my forehead. I stared up at him wondering what he was doing.

"You don't have a fever, that's good. I guess you just needed to rest. Are you feeling better?" _Translate: are you going to freak out again so that I can be prepared? _ Instead of saying that though, I just nodded softly. "Why?"

I honestly didn't mean to blurt that out, my mouth being a traitor said my thoughts out loud. He looks perplexed by my question for a second before answering for me.

"I…care about you Rose. I don't want you felling hurt or upset…" He trailed of looking away from me.

"I would have thought that you would be back in Russia by now." I muttered, hiding my eyes.

"Why?" His voice was shocked and disgusted at my words.

"I wouldn't think that you would want to be living with the crazy girl who takes pictures of herself cutting herself and has panic attacks…" I whispered, biting my lip. One of his hands fell under my chin and lifted it so that he could see my eyes. I still let my eyes wander around the room, trying not to look at him.

"Rose…Roza please look at me," he said softly. I let my eyes fall on his, seeing the heart-broken expression on his face. I didn't want him to look like that it broke my heart to see that expression on his face. I raised my hand and placed my hand on his cheek, staring into his eyes to see if I could find what was causing him this pain.

I didn't realize how close we were until I could feel his breath fanning my face. Somehow I got the strength to sit up, and I believe the strength came from Dimitri himself. He was own personal strength that I needed in my life each day.

"Roza, please believe me when I say that I would never walk away, I would never do that to you. I won't let you deal with this alone, there is nothing that could stop me from staying right here for as long as you need me." I tried to blink back tears, but they seemed to slip out anyways. His hand ran from my chin up to my cheeks to wipe away the tears.

"Really?" I asked slowly. He rested his forehead against mine and I let his touch comfort me.

"Of course," he replied quickly. I threw my arms around him, hiding my face in the crook of his neck. He wrapped his arms around me also and rubbed soothing circles into my back.

_You're going to hurt him. Nathan could be watching you right now and hurt him if that what it took to get me to go to him. Anything seems possible with Nathan, _someone whispered inside of my head. I just snuggled deeper into Dimitri's chest and sighed as I felt him kiss the top of my head.

When I felt my eyelids drooping, Dimitri must have noticed my body starting to become limp as he laid down never leaving the position that we had been in. He started singing to me softly and I smiling dreamily.

_This is gonna hurt, this is gonna hurt like hell_

_This is gonna damn near kill me, sometimes the truth ain't easy_

_ I know that you're scared of telling me something I don't wanna hear, _

_ But baby believe that I'm not leavin, you couldn't give me one good reason_

_Love don't run, love don't hide_

_It won't turn away or back down from a fight_

_Baby I'm right here and I ain't going anywhere _

_Loves to tough it won't give up no not on us_

_Baby love don't run_

I didn't get to the last chorus before I drifted off into sleep, listening to his promises and comfort as he sang to me.

I woke up to feeling of arms holding me tightly to a muscled body. At first I wanted to scream and run, but then I heard Dimitri's soft snore in my ear. I smiled, thanking whoever was up there for giving Dimitri into my life.

Deciding that Dimitri needed to sleep longer, seeing as he has probably been staying up late worrying about me, I moved out of his arms easily and kissed his cheek softly so that I wouldn't wake him. I walked to my door, taking one last look at the sleeping god, and started walking into the kitchen.

Before I went into the kitchen though, I looked inside the living room to see all my friends scattered around the sofas and floors. Lissa was asleep on Christian lap, resting her head on his chest. Christian had his head resting on the back of the couch and had both arms wrapped around his fiancé. Mia and Eddie were lying on the floor, really close together. I smiled at how cute they looked together before looking for mom where I found her asleep on the recliner. Adrian and Sydney laying on the other half of the couch that Christian and Lissa weren't occupying. Adrian lied sideways with his legs bent at the knees and Sydney was lying half on and half off Adrian, hand formed in a fist on his chest.

_Why does it feel like they are only setting themselves up for trouble? One wrong move and a bomb could fly through the window and kill all of them. _What happened with Mason will not happen again, I need to be strong, careful, if I wanted them to stay alive.

I felt something heavy land on my shoulder, metaphorically speaking of course. I sighed and entered the kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it water. I let the cool liquid fall down my throat easing the roughness that had shown up when I had woken up. I sat at the table staring in front of me for a long time, trying not to think, but just…be.

"Hey," I jumped at the sound of his voice, turning my head to look at him.

"Did I wake you?" I asked him softly as he came and sat beside me. Adrian's hair fell across his tired face as he shook his head.

"Just a restroom break," he replied. I nodded and looked down at my empty glass of water. "How are you Rose?" I shrugged, not quite sure how to answer that.

"How should I be?" I asked him unsure. He grabbed my hand and held it in both of his.

"I can't tell you how you're supposed to feel Rose," he told me sadly.

"I know," I sighed, leaning back in my chair. "I just…I don't feel anything. Is that bad? I mean my best friend, practically my boyfriend died by my hands-"

"WOAH! Wait, Rose you didn't kill Mason." He told me shocked, and a little mad.

"It feels like it, I could have sent that medicine straight to his heart. I shouldn't have told Lissa anything, or Mason could have survived." I cried, gripping his hand hard.

"It wasn't your fault Rose."

"I can't tell anyone, I don't want any of you getting hurt because of me." I told him, pleading him with my eyes to understand where I was coming from.

"Rose…we will figure this out. He can't hide forever," Adrian replied. "For now I think we should try to live normal until he decides that he wants to come back."

"I can't just go back to a normal life, not when I know he is watching my every move!" I yell, standing up and ripping my hand from his grasp.

"Rose please, don't give him what he wants," Adrian said standing up in front of me. "He wants you to have to watch your back, and live scared. Don't let him think that he can control your life."

"Adrian I don't want to give him what he wants, but someday he will find me. Whether at work or on the streets," I told him harshly with a hint of pain seeing on the scenarios that could happen.

"Rose, one of us will try to be with you always, just don't stop living your life. HE took something from you that you can never give back and he will be found and punished. I want the strong Rose back; don't let him steal it from you." I stared at him, not really expecting to have this conversation with him ever.

"Your right," I whispered.

"No Rose, you need- wait what?" He stopped himself, obviously thinking that I wasn't going to give in.

"I won't let him break me down. He tried to steal my virtue and my honor. He stole the life of my best friend. He tried to make me weak and he is trying to hurt the ones around me. I don't want him to win," I whispered. He smiled, happy at the turn of events.

"There the Rose that I flirted with every day." He whispered, trying to crack a joke. I smirked, trying not to hide the surprise of feeling myself smile. I didn't think that I would ever be able to smile again.

"Thank you Adrian," I wrapped my arms around his neck, smiling into his neck. He chuckled and hugged me tight. After a minute, I pulled away and started walking towards the door.

"Where are you going?" He asked surprised.

"Going to make a deal," I told him without turning around.

"With the devil? I think not, you might be emotionally strong but physically, you aren't ready for this Rose. You are going to get yourself killed if you go out there now." He said grabbing my arms and pulling me back inside.

I knew what he was saying; my body was sore and weak, and I couldn't even fight against his hold. I hated it when he was right.

"Okay, can you let me go now?"

"Are you going to run off if I do?" He retorted, I rolled my eyes and shook my head. He must have felt the truth because he let me go and I turned around.

"Thanks…" I trailed off, not sure what to do now.

"Come on Rose, I think we need to get you something to eat you are way too thin." I nodded and let him help me sit while he walked around the kitchen throwing together ingredients. I was wondering why he hadn't asked about the picture yet, but I was also relieved that he hasn't said anything about it either.

"Here you go Rose," I smiled as he placed an omelet in front of me. I dug in immediately, hungry since I haven't eaten in days.

"Rose!" I heard something thump in the bedroom that I think was mine, before thundering footsteps sounded in the hallway. "Where- Rose!" Dimitri exclaimed as he saw me in the kitchen. I smiled at him and raised both of my eyebrows.

"Hey Comrade," his eyebrows scrunched together at the name.

"Comrade?"

"I studied the RSSR in high school, I think it fits," I told him grinning that I remembered that piece of history from school.

"First of all, it's the USSR, second, I was worried since I didn't know where you went!" I patted the seat next to me, grimacing at the pain that he shot at my ego. He sat down, nodding to Adrian before grabbing my hand.

"How are you?" He asked me softly. I looked over at Adrian and smiled.

"I better, much better," he wouldn't know what happened between Adrian and I and he didn't ask either.

"That's great Roza," I smiled as he kissed my hand. I nodded as I took the final bite of my omelet.

"I need to tell everybody something," I said after a few minutes of silence. Both men looked at each other confused, wondering what I was going to do. I got up, not letting go of Dimitri's hand and led him into the living room with Adrian trailing behind us.

I felt bad for having to wake everyone up, but after Adrian reassured me that they had had enough sleep I started shaking everyone awake. Most were groggy, others like Lissa sprang up like a bat out of hell, and my mom was awake instantly, though I haven't even touched her yet.

Everyone looked at me shocked by my demeanor, I probably looked horrible…and the scar on my face probably made me look scary but I needed them to listen.

"Rose what's wrong?" Lissa asked after she had relaxed back into Christian's hold. Adrian moved so that he was sitting on the couch with Sydney sitting between his legs. Eddie and Mia had their back to the couch and my mom was standing watching me.

"Nothing's wrong per say, I just really needed to ask all of you something." When I saw them nodding for me to go on, I swallowed before continuing. "I had a little change of heart while all of you were sleeping, I…I don't want it to be like this, hiding from someone. That's only what he wants, for me to live in fear, and I don't want him to win, he hurt my best friend, and he is threatening to hurt any of you, I can't just tell you what I want to tell you but I don't want to live in fear of what will happen next."

"I just want everything to go back to normal, he won't mess my life up." I finished, looking at each of them. Lissa stood up and ran towards me grabbing me into a hug.

"I'm so sorry that everything has happened Rose, I'm just happy that you came back so strong. I missed this Rose." I smiled and hugged her one-handedly.

"Thanks Lissa, just know that I am going to be careful, I can't anyone especially you getting hurt if anything is said or done." She nodded into my neck and kissed my cheek.

"If things get too hard, I'm always someone you can talk to." I smiled, glad for that support.

Everyone soon agreed with my words but when they all stayed seated I shook my head and pointed to the door.

"When I say normal, I mean go home and sleep, I don't need that many people watching over me." I smirked as they got up and started telling me bye.

When they were gone, I looked for my mom, seeing as she didn't say anything after my little speech but I didn't see her anywhere.

"She went to her guest room Rose," I thanked Dimitri and walked down the hall towards my mom's room. I knocked on her door and was surprised to her a watery reply for me to enter. I walked in and noticed the red ring around my mom's eyes.

"Hey mom," I whispered, walking towards the bed she was sitting on. I sat beside her and she slipped her arm around my shoulders. Wanting the comfort, I laid my head on her shoulder, missing what I didn't have as a child.

"I'm so proud of you Rose," I looked up at her slowly, "you were almost…r-raped and then your best friend dies and you found the strength to fight back. I wish I could be as strong as you were," she sighed.

"You are, I got it from you," I told her. She shook her head, changing the subject.

"Last night, when you said Nathan…is it the same Nathan that I know?" I froze, clenching my teeth together tight. _Careful…_

"I…can't," I told her choking on my words.

"He has your father doesn't he?" I jumped away from her, surprised at how close she was to target. "I know you Rose; you weren't going to let him do anything until you knew that he was with them." She figured me out so easily.

"Mom, I…please stop," I told her. She ignored me though, standing up and grabbing my hand.

"We are going to get him back, but Rose please don't give in to Nathan don't let him threaten you." She whispered. "I know Nathan, he is crazy and when he sets his mind on something he gets what he wants.

"Me," I whispered. She looked taken aback, staring at me in horror. "He wanted you mom, but I couldn't…"

"Rose, you shouldn't have done that," she said grasping my forearms.

"I had to," I replied. "I can handle whatever Nathan does; I'm ready for him now."

"No you're not! Nathan can overpower you!" She yelled I flinched back from her words. "Just promise me that you will be careful."

"I promise," I whispered.

After the conversation with my mom, I left her room and walked towards mine. Dimitri was lying down, looking up at the ceiling. He looked at me when I entered and opened his arms for me. This new contact made me smile; I rested my head on his chest as we laid there.

"Can I ask a favor Rose?" Dimitri whispered after a while. I nodded my head instantly and he started running his fingers through my hair, I shivered lightly. "I was an instructor in Russia, a combat instructor actually. I'm sorry but I don't want you running around with no protection. Do you think I can teach you some protection moves if somebody gets you and you're by yourself?"

I lifted my head and looked into his eyes. He seemed truly worried and wanted me to be trained if anything happened, and the thought of seeing a sweating shirtless Dimitri was a dead giveaway.

"I would like that Dimitri," he sighed in relief and pulled me closer.

"Good, it will set my mind at ease just a little bit." I kissed his chest softly feeling him shiver, before resting my head evenly back down.

"Hey Dimitri, I was wondering. Ever since you've been here, I have never seen Tasha or any relatives for the wedding... the wedding! Oh my gosh, what day is it?"

"Shh, Roza, the wedding has been rescheduled. They moved it forwards another two months, Lissa already called her relatives and told them. Tasha couldn't come down with me as planned…she was going to come down a couple of days ago but Christian called her and told her not to worry." I sighed in relief thankful for Lissa.

"I wish she didn't have to move the wedding because of me…" I trailed off. I felt his chest vibrate with a short chuckle.

"You know she would have done it even if you told her not to," he replied. She nodded silently.

"She's a good friend," I whispered.

"She is," he stated agreeing whole-heartedly. He paused before deciding something to say in his head. "How about we start our training in a week?"

"Why a week?" I asked him confused.

"I need to build you up more; you're too weak to start training now." I grimaced at his reference of me being weak but knew he was speaking the truth.

"Okay sounds like a plan comrade," I yawned.

"Go to sleep Roza, you need to catch up on sleep." He told me, shifting so that I was more comfortable.

"But it's only morning, and I felt like I've been sleeping for weeks," I told him, but my words were only back-tracked by another yawn. It didn't help either that he was rubbing his hand through my hair and across my back.

"Sleep Roza," he whispered once more before my eyelids grew heavy and my breaths even.

**Aww Rose and Dimitri flush(: Did anyone think that they were going to kiss earlier? Ha just wait(: Anyways Rose has found strength, I didn't like her suffering that much... I wonder when Nathan will show himself?Please review for my long chapter(:... or for Dimitri..that works too**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey everyone! Awesome reviews last chapter! A question asked id why are they so close? Do they already know each other or is just fluff between Dimitri and Rose, and yes it is just some fluff, I like them together so muchh but right now he just comforting her in her time of need and slowly getting closer to her(: Feel free to keep asking questions if you dont understand though! Here is the next chapter ENJOY! **

**Chapter 13**

I woke up to darkness, no light coming through the window, meaning that it was nighttime. I breathed in deeply and then looked over at Dimitri who was sleeping silently next to me. I stared at him for a while, taking in all of his features, thinking about how long this would last.

I loved waking up to Dimitri, it was something that I was getting attached to, and I didn't want it to end. He knows what I went through, he was there the entire time, he's comforting me, and it makes me feel protected.

I don't look forward to the day that Dimitri thinks that I can handle sleeping by myself, thinking that I'm strong enough and I don't need him, but truth is…he was like my air that I needed to breathe each day.

I gripped his hand in mine, my thoughts running away from me as they thought of Dimitri leaving.

_After the weddings over…he'll be gone. _I winced at the thought, but knew it was true. The death grip I had acquired on his hand must have woken him up because he groggily opened his eyes a tad and looked up at me.

"Good morning," he said lowly, quietly.

I giggled lightly and pointed outside, "it's nighttime."

"Oh," he replied, looking out the window surprised. I laughed again before slipping myself out of my bed. "Where are you going?"

"I need to shower; badly…I don't remember the last time I did which sickens me." I scowled looking away.

"It's okay Rose, it wasn't your fault…you were just grieving." I nodded, thanking his comfort before continuing out the door. I walked into my restroom and pulled out a big, fluffy white towel from the shelf. I placed it where I could reach it when I got out of the shower and then started stripping my clothes off.

I turned the water on hot, moaning as the steamy water burned my skin and massaged my muscles. I grabbed some of my Vanilla shampoo and conditioner washing my hair thoroughly and releasing it from the rat's nest that it had recently been.

After washing my body and shaving my legs and everywhere else needed, I got out and wrapped the towel around me, shivering as my toes touched the cool tile. I cursed as I realized that I didn't bring any clothes with me and took my chance of going back to my room. Luckily Dimitri wasn't there, but I did here clanging coming from my kitchen giving me an estimate of where he could be.

I slid on a pair of dark pants and a black kiss t-shirt before brushing my hair out and throwing it up in a bun. I slipped some socks in so my feet wouldn't be cold, not bothering with shoes as I left the room.

"You didn't have to make breakfast," I told him as I sat down at the stool by the counter. He glanced at me from his spot at the stove, smirking slightly at me, before glancing back down at his work.

"That's what I said but he was stubborn," I didn't realize my mom was in the room until she spoke, scaring me slightly. "Sorry Rose, I didn't mean to scare you."

"Don't worry Mom, I didn't see you when I came in," I told her smiling at her in reassurance. It seemed as if she was trying to be subtle and was trying not to scare me.

"What do you plan on doing today Rose?" I thought about, trying not the think about what I need to do before it became too much.

"I need to call Mason's parents so that I can help them with the f-funeral." I choked out, staring at the phone on the wall like it had a knife as waiting to kill me.

"Are you sure you're ready for that?" Mom asked comfortingly. I sighed and shook my head meaningfully.

"No, but I need to be, I don't want to be here moping when it doesn't benefit Mason at all. I need to be doing something so that I am not bad enough as to not help with his own funeral. It's my fault he's like this; I might as well be doing something." I grumbled, resting my head on my hand.

"Rose you know that wasn't your fault, why are you still blaming yourself for it?" Dimitri asked coming into the conversation.

"Because it is my fault, I shouldn't have opened my big mouth it always gets me into trouble," I muttered, looking down.

"Rose listen to me, losing Mason wasn't your fault, it wasn't done by your hands, and it was done by Nathan's." Mom piped in sadly.

No matter what they said though, it wouldn't erase the guilt that ate me apart inside. It wouldn't erase the regret of telling someone what happened. They gave up soon enough, letting Dimitri hand us some food as we sat down and ate silently.

**1 Week Later**

As planned, I helped the Ashford's with Mason's funeral. They were happy that I did so and they too told me that it wasn't my fault, but I didn't believe them either.

The funeral was yesterday, and it felt like the worst day of my life. I sat down in front, listening to all the stories they had about Mason, and watching them all break down in tears. Mason had been a big part in my many people lives. He was friends with everybody in high school because he was always friendly and good-looking. Most of the people here were from high school, but since Mason was a soldier, they had men holding up guns and a flag folded, handing it the Mr. and Mrs. Ashford.

**Flashback**

_I sat there stonily, staring at the minister as he said his words to Mason and the lord, wishing for Mason to find his way to god's home. It broke my heart and had me in tears as his casket laid neatly in the aisle._

_"His soft spirit, may it find its home with you my lord. May he find your comfort as he watches over his loved ones, and let us cherish the gift that Mason brought into our hearts with fond memories and let us not regret any time spent with him." The minister sang, his voice echoing around the church. _

_I listened as others made their way on stage to talk about the boy that touched their hearts and soon I stood up._

_"Mason was- is my best friend, and the best boyfriend that he could be. His heart was larger than the ocean and his personality got everybody to love him._

_"When- when we graduated, I didn't know the choice he had made until he told me the day that he left for war. He came by my house and for the first time I saw a man, not the boy that traveled with me in high school and played pranks on the other students, but a strong man._

_"He asked me if I remembered when we were little in the backyard of my house, and he told me that he wanted to be a fighter. I remembered him saying that 'I going to fight for you Rose, I'm going to fight for all the others and I will kick all of those guys butts." A few chuckles rang throughout the room._

_"When I told him I did, he replied with 'I'm fulfilling my promise Rose, I'm going to fight, and I'm going to do it for you.' He grew up that day and I felt like I was losing him if went off to war but I knew that he was the most stubborn boy in the whole world." Tears were flowing down my face already but a sob threatened to take over as my next words came._

_"When he came back two weeks ago for my friend's wedding, he still looked as he always did- strong, smart, and funny. But he also gathered another trait that I have never seen from him before- courage. I was in a horrible position as he protected me, just like he always would, and was given the courage that I never seen before in a man. He might not have died fighting in war, but he died fighting for me and I owe my life to him and I will always be grateful that Mason was in my life." I walked down and stopped at his casket._

_"I love you Mase," I whispered, kissing the top before sobbing and running out of the church. _

**End Flashback**

Dimitri had found me crying behind a tree by the church. He held onto me tightly and whispered soothing words into my ear before I could calm down.

It didn't help that they started up all over again as the soldiers shot the guns into the sky for Mason. He couldn't calm me down that time though, Lissa had to help.

So today as I lay in bed, I thought how a week has gone by and I still haven't heard from Nathan once, and I was kind of scaring me. It was like he waiting for the best time to take me, I just wished he would give my father back.

I opened my phone and stared at the number that Nathan had texted me on, deciding if I really wanted to get a hold of him. I decided against, still too scared to see what would happen if I did.

Dimitri and I had started training also; he has me running around my neighborhood three times because it was a mile each time. I couldn't believe him when he said that but he replied that he could run seven. Show-off.

_"Why do I have to run this much again?" _

_"You want to be fast, and can run for a long time; it will help against an attacker." Dimitri replied as I skidded to a stop next to him. He didn't seem out of breath and he did one more than me before I got to training that morning!_

I saw it his way and continued running, I had training in thirty minutes from now behind that it was still early morning and we started at six. _I know crazy right? _

Right when I got outside, I passed Dimitri and started running. He caught up to me quickly, but I didn't really pay him any mind. I was still upset about Nathan, what was he waiting for? Does he want me to be scared and jumpy?

"Rose? Are you alright this morning?" Dimitri asked after we had run two laps around the neighborhood.

"Yeah, why would I be?" I replied a little too quickly. I didn't look at him but I felt his eyes piercing me. I felt myself starting to get angry. _Why did Nathan have to ruin my life? I'm even lying to Dimitri now, all because I'm scared of telling Dimitri that I'm scared. _

I hate being scared and it was making me angry that Nathan was the cause of it. I ended up sprinting the last lap and added a forth one onto it for good measure, trying to run out my anger. I stood gasping for breath as I stopped in front of my house again.

Dimitri walked up to me and placed his hands on my shoulder and looked intently into my eyes. He looked for a couple more minutes until he pulled me into his chest and said, "What going on Roza?"

"He's done nothing, it's like he waiting for the perfect moment when he can come after me and it's scaring me, and I'm mad that I'm so scared and weak…" I cried, clutching him to me. He rubbed my back soothingly, trying to calm me down with his touch, which worked well.

"Roza you are not weak, don't be scared of him, I will not let him touch you ever again," Dimitri told me, locking both hands against my cheeks so that I would look up at him.

"Promise?" I whispered my voice weak and tiny.

"Promise," he replied, his words strong and comforting. I wrapped my arms around him again and he did the same.

"I don't know where you came from Dimitri Belikov but I'm glad that you came into my life, you are really something special," he responded by tightening his hold on my body and I smiled feeling safe.

"How about I teach you a couple moves now?" I grinned and nodded my head enthusiastically. We spent the rest of the morning working on moves that I could use in certain situations against an attacker. It gave me a piece of mind when we were done that I was getting good at them.

I took a shower quickly so that Dimitri could take one after and walked down the stairs right as the door rang. I walked over to it and opened it to see Lissa, Mia, and Sydney standing at the door and smiling happily.

"Do you want to come with us? We are being fitted for our dresses today. I could tell the man that you couldn't come or something if you don't want to-"Lissa started but I guilty cut her off.

"Of course I'll come! I have to the bride's dress too and approve of the brides maids dress. I won't ruin this day for because of what is happening in my life." Lissa threw her arms around my neck happily and I kissed her cheek.

"Thank you Rose!" She whispered in my ear, which I returned with a smile. I walked towards my mom's room and knocked on her door telling her I was leaving with the girls. She seemed pleased for me to get out of the house besides for training with Dimitri. I then walked towards the bathroom where it was still closed but the water wasn't running anymore.

"Hey Dimitri?" I knocked on the door, he opened the door after a couple of seconds, but I froze when I saw that he was only in a towel. Water was still dripping down his perfectly sculpted chest and his hair was hanging loosely around his head, but his eyes seemed to glisten with…amusement.

_He knew that I was checking him out! _ I quickly looked away from the sexy god in front of me and told him that I was going to be with girls before I ran down the hall without looking back.

_Damn that was too good to be true, _I shivered, shaking the thought from my head as I grabbed my purse and slipped in my shoes. I arrived in the living room and told the girls I was ready and we got into Mia new white beetle. It had back seats and everything which I thought was very nice.

The drive wasn't quiet, and we arrived at the dress store fairly quickly, walking in and sitting down on some chairs waiting for the person that was supposed to be helping us today.

**Hehe...sooo? Review? PLeaseeee(: I just love them soo soo much:D**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hey everyonee(: I can't believe all of the reviews I got last chapter and for the one person who reviewed all thirteen chapter in a row. Thanks JoJo110465! I enjoyed looking at every single review as it came in(: I can't believe I already 171 reviews its awesome!(: Here is by far...I believe...the best chapter though there is a cliffhanger like always(; R&R! ENJOY!**

Chapter 14

"I think that's it Liss," she twirled once more in front of us and a blazing smiling lit up her face. She started to giddily jump up and down in joy, and I could see her eyes watering slightly.

"It's perfect," she squealed, running her hands down the length of her dress once more. Though I thought she always looked like a princess, she definitely looked like a Queen now. The white dress was strapless, rolling smoothly over her breasts with small pearls and sparkles sprinkled around them. The dress slid down her slim waist and then started to flow out in a graceful wave. It was made of a white, stain backdrop and a clear, rough fabric over it. She had also found a pair of white three-inch heels that fit perfectly with the dress.

"Definitely," I told her smiling. It fit her perfectly and gave her the graceful, fragile look that radiated off her face daily.

"Okay Miss Dragomir, do you think that you have found _the one," _she asked, sighing enviously. She was very sweet, helping us through different dresses and styles before –four hours later- she found _the one. _

"Yes, thank you, I would like to buy this dress," she told her smiling sweetly. The saleswomen, Veronica, nodded and motioned for Lissa to change back into her normal clothes. Lissa came out moments later in the clothes that she came in and the dress hanging on a hanger in one hand, and the heels hanging off two fingers on the other hand.

Veronica scanned the price tag, typing a few things into the keyboard while Lissa jumped up and down in anticipation. She paid for the dress and heels, and thanked Veronica for all of her help. We walked out of the store, all of us chatting joyously as we held our dresses.

"Okay, I'm pretty hankered out, why don't we head back home for the day," Mia said, a silent whisper in the back of her words. Lissa nodded, letting Mia sigh in relief as she turned onto the highway. I sat in the back with the dresses, while Lissa sat in the passenger seat playing on her phone.

"Better not be sending a picture of your dress to Christian Liss, you know the rules," I told her smirking, she didn't reply, but I saw the small drop of her lips on the side.

"Okay Rose, we're here, tell the Russian and your Mom we said hi," Mia told me as I started grabbing my dress and Lissa's. Christian didn't need to see the dress until the day of the wedding. As I was getting out however, Lissa stopped me looking behind my shoulder.

"Whose here Rose?" I looked behind me to see a silver Ford parked in the driveway behind my car and my Mom's car. "Do we need to come in with you, is it-"

"No Liss, don't worry," I told her grinning, "I know whose here, I'll talk to the both of you later." They looked behind me wearily before smiling and pulling away from my house and leaving my sight. I turned around, huffing as I held up the two dresses and the two pairs of shoes while carrying my purse and trying for a free hand.

I ended up walking through the door juggling everything single thing in my hands without dropping any of it. Before I knew it, a pair of hands was picking up one of the dresses and a pair of shoes. I smiled sheepishly at Dimitri and stood up straighter.

"Thanks," I remarked huffing.

"Your welcome Roza, do you want me to take them to your room?" I nodded and he took the other dress and pair of shoes in his hand before disappearing into the hallway.

"Rose!" I turned and smiled and the men sitting in my living room.

"Denis, Artur, Lev!" I replied happily, walking up and hugging them tightly. The squeezed back just as tightly, holding on for a few more seconds than normal. "What are you going doing here?"

"We…uh heard what happened," Artur said quietly, sobering up. I grimaced looking down at the floor.

"Yeah," I replied stupidly, no other words coming to mind.

"How are you feeling?" Denis asked, sitting me down on the couch, Lev sitting on one side and Denis sitting on the other. Artur moved and sat down on the chair facing us. I shrugged my shoulders, slowly looking up to meet his eyes.

"It's getting better, it's still hard to…think about it, but it's getting easier," I repeated, leaning in slightly to Denis's comforting touch.

"If it helps any, my offer still stands," Denis told me smiling. I looked at him confused, before I realized what he was mentioning. I chuckled lightly before shaking my head.

"No need to kick Dimitri's ass, he's really helped me since he's been here, a lot," I told them, looking forward. Lev shoved my shoulder lightly, smirking.

"We understand Rose, we've met the guy, he's a good guy we like him," he told me winking. I felt myself shrink at what he was implying. _Think of Mason. _

"That's…good, thanks for your consent for my friend," I told him, probably emphasizing friend a little too hard. He shrugged, shaking off the notion while I heard Artur chuckle soundlessly in the chair.

"What have you guys been up to?" I asked them, trying to get off of the gloomy topics. Denis smirked, looking at the front door in amusement.

"We had a couple shoots so far but we're on vacation. The last girl made us dress up like dogs; it was pathetic and hurt my masculine pride." He snorted sarcastically, "no one can take pictures like you Rose, when are you coming back?"

Though no one was sitting close enough to shove him, I could Lev and Artur wanted to. I knew their thoughts perfectly, _she's a mess, she doesn't have a specific date till she gets back you moron. _I understand perfectly which made this all the more harder to say.

"I don't really plan on coming back," I told them, looking down sadly. I heard their intake of breath with surprise and shock, but I didn't look back up.

"What do you mean Rose?" Lev asked softly, placing his hand on my arm.

"I don't think that I can go back to my job, it doesn't seem…fit anymore," I told him shrugging my shoulders. They all gave me all looks of sympathy and sadness but I just stood up and smiled. "It was good while it lasted though right?"

I tried to sound enthusiastic, I really did, but I could feel their waves of sadness. They were number one models, and while I quit be a photographer is like moving to Florida, far away from home. I didn't want to, but I couldn't see myself ever picking up a camera again.

Nobody but them knew of my decision, not even Sydney, I'm going to have to tell her to find a new photographer soon, or the jobs going to go down the drain. I also needed to get my things out of my office and tell Victor myself and in person.

"Yeah, you're a great photographer Rose," Denis whispered, placing his arms around my shoulders.

"Was, I _was _a great photographer," I murmured, smiling at them. They sighed in defeat and soon enough they were standing up to leave. I guess they didn't really have anything else to talk about.

"We'll still stay in touch though right?" Artur asked, as he hugged me. I pulled back shocked.

"Of course! If I don't hear from you every month then I will find all of you one by one and-"

"Okay, okay, no more details we get it," Denis laughed, placing his hand over my mouth. I bit it making him flinch back and shake his hand, glaring at me softly.

"I mean it," I told them as they walked out the door. The all nodded and piled into Denis's Ford before I saw it disappear around the corner. I turned around and jumped back when I noticed Dimitri's tall form standing right behind me.

"Dimitri," I breathed out, "I didn't see you there."

"What do you mean your quitting?" Dimitri said, ignoring my statements. I flinched back at his harsh tone, leaning on the door for support. He saw this and he sighed, his face softening. "Rose, photography is your passion, something that you have done since you were little. Why would you want to give it up?'

"I doesn't fit with me anymore Dimitri, as you probably heard," I told him sourly, thinking that he was eavesdropping on the conversation that I had with Denis, Lev, and Artur.

"That's bull Rose and you know it," he stated, eyeing me critically. I bit my bottom lip and looked away.

"It's the truth," I muttered loudly so that he could hear me. He sighed and walked closer to me, I could feel his eyes boring holes into the side of my face. Soon enough he grabbed my hand and pulled me down the hallway and then into my room. He sat me down on the bed and then started searching through my stuff. "What are you doing?" I exclaimed.

"Searching…here it is," he murmured, pulling out my camera that I had under some clothes in my drawer. I eyed the device warily, watching as he brought it closer and then placed it in my hands. The cold metal, smooth over my fingertips, was placed into my hands perfectly, giving me control of any memory that came across my path.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat before dropping the camera onto the bed besides me. I didn't look up at Dimitri, but I could see his tense figure out of the corner of my eye. He reached over and placed the camera back in my hands, holding my wrists in place so that I wouldn't put the camera back again.

"I might not have known you for a long time like all of your friends Rose," Dimitri whispered, kneeling in front of me, "but I know that you love photography and that if you could you would be behind the camera every single minute of every hour of every single day. When you have the camera in front of your eyes, you make people wonder what is behind it, who is hidden from them, what secrets are held within them and what they are thinking when they press their finger down and capture another moment in time.

"With every click that I hear from that camera, I wonder what exactly is going through your head. I want to know the secrets hidden with it, and every time I hear that small noise, I see joy lit up your features, This is something that you enjoy Rose, don't give it up because you think that you don't deserve this joy anymore, because you think that it isn't fair that you can be happy but Mason can't." I gasped but continued looking at the ground.

"I know you Rose, I know what you're thinking, and you have captured my mind since I first met you, but you cannot think that giving up your joy will make Mason happy, I think it will be the exact opposite. He would hate that you were doing this," he stated, shaking my hands. I flexed my fingers around the camera once more.

"I can't Dimitri, you don't understand," I whispered, tears pooling in my eyes.

"Yes I do, when I was little I absolutely adored my father, he was my role model. He was the one that owned the combat building that I now own. He taught me every day about new combat moves and wanted to be just like him when I grew up." He sucked in a deep breath, his voice shaking slightly.

"Over the years I started seeing a change in him, something vile that starting sneaking into his eyes. Soon he never had time to teach me, but I always went to building so that I could work on my moves myself. I mostly taught myself everything I knew.

"When I was thirteen, my father had crossed the line. He wasn't the nice, happy dad that taught me combat, he was the cruel, selfish, father that ruined my life. I came home from school and heard yelling and things being broken from inside. I ran in and saw my dad hitting and kicking my mom with my little sister Viktoria sobbing violently. She barely five at the time, and it was horrible for her to see what her own father was doing.

"I got Viktoria to move under the kitchen table and wait for me to come and get her while I went back into the living room and walked straight up to my father and socked him in the face." He had a look of grim satisfaction on his face as I absorbed all of this information that Dimitri was telling me.

"I was already taller than him, stronger than him, and I continued beating the living shit out of him until my mom pulled me off of him. My father was enough alive to crawl out the front door while I slammed the front door in his face and I never saw him again." He stopped, and I saw the anger hidden in his eyes. I placed a comforting hand on his arm, but I realized that he wasn't done yet.

"I stopped doing combat, I stopped going to the gym and I locked up my father's combat place. It was my passion, to fight, to be in control, but after I learned so much from my father I didn't think that I should continue it. It was the worst mistake of my life.

"I was with my best friend Ivan; we were going out to party for the New Year. We had been there long when Ivan had gotten mad when he saw his girlfriend kissing another guy. We were around eighteen at the time, and I had almost forgotten everything that I have known about fighting or any type of combat." This time a look of pain fell over his face. I gripped his hand in mine tightly, not worried that he had been yelling at me five minutes before.

"I was chasing after him, and it was already dark. He went through a dark alley, a short-cut that we used daily. I saw a man come out from behind some trashcans and he started attacking us. If I would have kept up my combat training I probably would have beaten the man without a struggle, but he managed to beat both Ivan and I up pretty good. He had a knife and he had cut me several times, though I only have one scar," he said, tracing a line that I couldn't see over his stomach. I gasped, horrified at Dimitri getting hurt this bad.

"I was unconscious immediately, and when I woke up, Ivan was dead. He died from internal bleeding, something that I managed to avoid. He was beat up really good and I felt that it was my fault that he was dead." This time his eyes really did water and he wiped away the tears feverishly.

"I started training again immediately, thinking that I shouldn't have ever stopped, because it could hurt me in the future and I would regret it, and I did," he whispered, turning to face me. I touched his face and rubbed my thumb across the stubble settling there.

"I'm sorry Dimitri, I'm so sorry," I whispered, wiping a stray tear away. He squeezed the hand that I still held in my grasp in thanks and I reached up and kissed his cheek. "Photography though isn't going to be live and death, I'll survive without it," I told him, my breath fanning across his cheek. He shook his head and pulled out of my grasp.

"You will regret it though Rose, you have to know that," he told me. When I gave him no response he put the camera back in my hands and kissed my forehead as he stood up. "Just think about what I said Rose," he whispered as he walked out of the room.

I stayed in my spot, staring at the camera for a long period of time. I finally stood up and walked over to the dresser; pulling open the same spot that Dimitri had opened up, but instead of placing the camera back in there I grabbed the photo album and set them both on my desk before sighing and walking towards my door to find Dimitri.

I walked around the house; I even looked into my mom's room to see that she was sleeping restlessly. I walked in and saw her hands clutching a picture frame. Tears pricked at my eyes as I saw who was in the picture. It was my dad and myself with I was at least 3. He was smiling proudly and me while I was in the middle of laughing joyfully as he threw me up in the air.

This gave me the thought that I had made the right decision. He might not have been home as much as I wanted but he did love me. Both of my parents did, and it would be stupid for me to not get my father back for my mom.

If I needed to be bait then I would. I would do whatever I could to get my father back to my mother. I just needed to figure out what to do. I closed the door as I quietly walked out of her room and back down the hall, pushing my thoughts out of my head so that I could search for Dimitri.

I walked into the kitchen and for the first time noticed the small piece of paper sitting there with Dimitri handwriting scrawled across it.

_Went for a run, I will be back soon._

_Dimitri._

I sighed and walked outside to sit on the front steps to wait for him- to apologize. When I couldn't wait any longer, I started walking the opposite way that we always ran, hoping to see him when he came back.

I finally realized the coolness that littered the air as I walked and found myself shivering badly. I continued on though, wanting to find Dimitri before I went back. I had forgotten a jacket and was only wearing jeans and a simple shirt, which didn't save me from the cold any.

I rubbed my hands up and down my arms to create friction and try to warm myself up some. It helped little and soon my eyes scrunched, looking forward through the fog that had started to encase the night. I heard a motor start driving behind me and I waited for it to pass but I soon realized that it wasn't. I stared behind me, but the fog but becoming so thick that I couldn't see passed the sidewalk. I froze and stared harder, trying to see _something_ through the fog.

My feet started moving without knowing and soon I was running the opposite direction, but I didn't get far because arms had grabbed my shoulders and were pulling me back. I screamed loud, letting it pierce the sky loudly. A hand slapped onto my mouth and started to pick up my flailing body. I kicked at him knees, but he just huffed and hit me over the head with something hard. I felt myself start to daze in and out before black spots filled my vision quickly.

"Rose! ROSE!" A voice screamed loudly through the air. _Dimitri…_I whispered inside my head. _Too late, I didn't reach him quick enough. _

"Hurry, get her in the car," a man hissed from behind me. I felt myself being carried and then shoved into the back seat of a vehicle before I felt the vibrations beneath me as the car started up.

"ROSE!" Dimitri yelled once more before I whimpered and passed out as the vehicle quickly tore off into the night, leaving Dimitri in the dust.

**Eeeee!**

**Please Review!(: **


	15. Chapter 15

***Hides behind boulder while glaring at the school* **

**Yes I know that I am late in uploading and I want to 'pop' myself in the head right now. I've been trying to get time to write but I have so much homework and basketball games that I have beeen staying up late every night. I don't have any free time which is stressing me out but I needed to get something out to you so please enjoy this extremly short chapter that Dimitri's hot body is in, and Rose's nightmare come true0.o ENJOY!**

I stared through the thick fog on the road, hoping to see the van come speeding back down it. It was silent, and I noticed that no one was on the street; no one knew what had just happened.

Turning around, I punched the first thing I could find which happened to be a large oak tree. I punched at least twenty times before I felt the pain in my hand become worse and worse. I knew it was broken.

The van burned images in my head. Black figures grabbing and picking her up, trying to put her in the car. Running as fast as I could, which, was not fast enough. I reached the van just as it sped away, calling her name loudly, with pain lingering in my voice.

I remember looking at the back of the van, cursing when I saw that the license plate had been covered so that it was unreadable.

I sank down onto the sidewalk, throwing my head into my hands. I couldn't protect her like I knew I could have. I couldn't protect the charming, stubborn, broken girl that had fallen into my arms the first day I met her. I couldn't save Rose, just like I couldn't save Ivan.

I failed.

What I wanted to know was: what was she doing out her at all? Was she waiting for me to finish my run? If so, it made me feel a whole lot guiltier.

But, it made me feel a lot angrier too. I wanted to find this Nathan and rip him to pieces. I wanted to stab him repeatedly until he screamed in pure torture and agony.

I wasn't going to accomplish this, however, without getting up off of my sorry ass and finding her.

I got up quickly and ran back to the house. I slammed the door closed behind me, running towards my phone that I had left on the counter. I opened it and dialed 9-1-1.

"Dimitri? What's going on?" Janine asked, jogging into the room. As I was about to tell her, a lady answered the phone.

"9-1-1 what's your emergency?" She asked quickly.

"Dimitri?" Janine questioned again.

"My friend was just kidnapped, a van just came by and threw her i9n and in think that they knocked her out. I need help quickly! Please!" I told her hoarsely. Janine gasped, and I saw her slide down onto the kitchen floor.

"Where was this seen?" The women asked formally.

"1524 Longarm St., please hurry!" I yelled.

"We have police heading towards you now; do have any more information about the kidnappers?"

"They were in a black van, but their license plate numbers were covered up. The men were all wearing masks, and black suits, but I believe the main name is Nathan…" I didn't know the last name, making me stop.

"Willbraw," Janine whispered weakly.

"Willbraw," I told the women confused. How the hell did Janine know the guy's last name? She looked pale and was soon about to pass out. I answered a few more questions until she told me that there should be police coming down my road right now. I hung up and found she was right.

"One step closer Rose," I whispered as the red and blue lights erupted into the night.

**RPOV**

I woke groggily, a sharp pain in my head. I went to touch the spot but was stopped by a rough pull on my wrists. I tried the other arm, but it was tied just the same, as were my ankles. I blinked quickly, trying to get a center on my surroundings.

I was on a bed, it wasn't an extraordinary bed, but it was a bed. There were no windows in the room, and a small chill was making me colder by the second. I pulled harshly against the rope holding me there, but it was tightly wound on my wrists.

A soft sob echoed the room, and I realized that it was mine. The situation was finally dawning on me. Nathan kidnapped me, grabbed me before I could run. Dimitri was so close but he was too late. Now I'm being held hostage, and I was terrified for what he had in store for me. He was definitely going to get what he came for this time.

A light filled the room as a door opened. I closed my eyes against the bright light before slowly opening them. Nathan stood in the doorway, a small grin on his lip. Hi demeanor made me shiver; he was just as cold as was when I saw him before.

"Hello my dear Rose," he said happily. I tried glaring at him, but I knew the look of terror still hadn't left my face. He walked into the room, switching on a light before closing the door behind him. "I've been waiting for you to be alone so that I could sweep you up all the easier."

"What do you want Nathan?" I whispered my voice scared and weak.

"What I didn't get the first time Rose. You exchanged yourself for your father, and you know just as well that he isn't going home until you give me what you want." He moved closer as he spoke before he was standing just above me.

He trailed a finger down my stomach, but right before he reached my sensitive part he pulled away and grinned coldly. I was crying, large tears falling down my face, knowing that this time I wasn't going to be saved.

"Shh my dear, this can go by real easy if you don't struggle with me. Don't you want your father to be let go alive?" A sob left my lips, not letting me speak. I nodded though, closing my eyes as his eyes danced mischievously.

"Now Rosie, do know that I don't want to do all the work, I'm going to need a little help." He whispered in my ear. Another sob erupted form my chest, but his hand covered my mouth quickly. "Think about your father."

I cried as his hand left my mouth and trailed down my neck over my breasts and towards my stomach. Before I could do anything, he threw his leg over my waist so that he was straddling me. My body started shaking with fear and I started thrashing.

A sharp sting hit my cheek and I was dazed for a second before I realized he had slapped me.

"I thought we agreed that you had to be a good girl?" He whispered menacingly. I cried out as he gripped my hair in his hand and slapped my head harshly on to the bed, that wasn't as soft as I realized. Stars danced along me vision and I gasped for air harshly.

I felt Nathan's hand leave my hair and return to my stomach, trailing down and hooking a finger under my shirt and tugging harshly, ripping it in two. The top of my body now lay bare, beside the bra covering my breasts. HE clicked his tongue in disapproval before snapping the bra and leaving me completely bare.

"You have a gorgeous body Rosemarie, I can't wait until you are mine," he whispered into my ear before his filthy mouth fell onto mine. I struggled, but he only pressed his lips harder to mine, shoving his tongue down my throat, choking me. When he let go, I started coughing hoarsely, sobs coming out among them.

His disgusting mouth started sucking on my breasts and I struggled harder until I felt pain on my stomach. Looking down, I noticed the dark, red liquid running down a cut on my stomach, reminding me of the other cut on the side of my face.

"If you're not going to be good, then neither am I," He whispered coldly, before drawing another red line parallel to the one he had just made on my stomach. I cried out in pain, watching his cold face gleam happily with my pain.'

I wanted it to be over, the whole time he was attacking me. I sobbed, cried, and screamed for help earning me a beating or a cut on another part of my body.

Later, I laid on the bed that was covered in my blood, sobbing loudly at the pain and the disgusting things that had just happened to me. The only pure part I had left was gone, taken by a disgusting man. His touch was possessive and he made me do things that I didn't want to do.

He shoved himself into my mouth, making me suck him until he would choke me and then made himself fill my throat with his seed. He made me swallow him and he torture me by shoving himself into my bottom half harshly, tearing fibers and making blood run between my legs.

To put it all together, I was completely broken. I couldn't move, because of the cuts and bruises that littered my body. I was weak from blood loss, and if I moved any I would scream out in protest. I couldn't escape; there was no hope for me. I was beaten and dirty and useless. I wished that I would just die.

I didn't know when but I passed out. Wanting death to come find me as soon as possible so that I didn't have to live another day.

**Like I said, it's not that long, but I am currently trying to type of the next chapter so that I can get it out to you. Also for fans of my other story I Changed him, I will hopefully update that one soon too! Please review because I want to make sure I didn't lose any of you!**


	16. Chapter 16

**I knew that the last chapter wasn't that good, so I decided to upload again and this one is longer and better, and completely sad. It starts with Dimitri but then turns into Rose. Please ENJOY!**

It has been a week since Rose has been missing. The police can't find a lead to her whereabouts and I've been pulling my hair out with frustration. Something horrible happened to Rose, I can feel it, and it was making me sick to the bone.

Her friends found out that she was missing, and hurried over so they could help search for her. Her mom just sat in a chair and stared in front of her, moments of guilt of sadness flushing her features. She never spoke but I knew that she knew more than she was telling us. She never explained how she knew Nathan, but none of us have ever asked.

We were running out of help though, we needed to know what she knew, which is why I was kneeling in front of her right now. She stared through me, most likely not knowing that I was sitting right in front of her. I placed a hand on her shoulder and shook her lightly.

"Janine?" I asked hesitantly. She blinked a few times, before finally looking at me. "You need to tell us what you know; it will help the police figure out where Rose is." I told her reassuringly. She closed her eyes, shaking her head.

"It could harm somebody else," She replied.

"Nathan already has Rose, that is all he wants, we just need information so that we can find her." I told her slowly. A tear fell down her face, rolling down her chin before dripping onto her pale clasped hands.

"Nathan was my boyfriend in high school," she started, "he thought we were going to be together forever, but I cheated on him with Abe. Nathan let it go after I told him it was a mistake. It most definitely wasn't though, I loved Abe, and I thought he was Mr. Perfect. A month later I found out I was pregnant with Rose, he got so angry and he hit me." She cried, covering her face with her hands.

"I called Abe, telling him what happened. He was so angry but I told him not to go after Nathan, he was just mad. I never saw Nathan again. Abe disappeared a couple months ago and now I know that Nathan is doing this for revenge. He got to Rose, and she gave herself up for me," she sobbed harder. Her whole body was shaking.

I stared at Janine shocked, Nathan was doing all of this stuff for revenge, and now that Rose is into the picture he decides that she would be better.

"Do you know if there is any place he could have taken her?" I asked her calmly. She shook her head, the only reply he could give me at the moment. I looked up at one of the officers and he sighed and shook his head.

"I don't think that is going to help any, we need places, people that Nathan was friends with, or even enemies that Nathan had." The police officer told him.

"Elena," Janine choked out, "Elena was his sister. She hated Nathan for what he did to me, but then she slightly disliked me seeing as I made her brother go away."

"Do you know where his sister is now?" The police officer asked. She nodded, throwing out an address off the tip of her tongue. I felt adrenaline hit my body, grateful for the new information.

I suggested to Janine that she should go sleep, which she did quickly. When she was gone, I turned around and saw all of the Police officers writing things down in a notepad and talking on the phone. Rose's friend stood off to the side, the same look of relief and hope in their eyes.

I asked one of the officers if I could come with, which he hesitated and said no to. I was frustrated I didn't go, but also didn't want to get in the way of their job. I sat down on the sofa, watching them move around and get things together.

"Dimitri?" I looked over as Lissa sat down. She seemed very worried as she looked over at me.

"Hey Lissa," I replied.

"I have a horrible feeling in my gut, it's like something is really wrong with Rose," she whispered, tears framing her eyes. I swallowed, a thick rock stuck in my throat.

"I do too," I whispered," but the only thing we have to hope for is that she is still alive and that we find her soon." I told her. She nodded, looking back at the officers like I had been doing before.

"You like Rose a lot don't you?" She whispered, not looking at me. I looked away, hesitating with my answer.

"Very much," I replied, before sighing and admitting the truth, "I might actually love her."

"Good," Lissa smiled, "you're a good man Dimitri, and Rose needs you in her life. The only person that Rose really opened up to was her camera, and her Aunt." Lissa admitted. I sighed and clenched my fist tighter together.

"I wish that I could have run faster, I wasn't fast enough," I whispered, a tear floating down my face. Though I was still looking away, I felt her hand touch my shoulder and I looked up as she shook her head.

"It wasn't your fault Dimitri; remember that we will get her back. It will just take a lot of luck and this Elena that Janine talked about." I nodded my head, wiping my eyes when I saw the officers start moving toward the door. One stayed however and motioned for me to talk to him. I got up and met him in the center of the living room.

"We will call you Mr. Belikov when anything more is revealed about Ms. Hathaway's whereabouts." I nodded and shook his hand, watching as he walked out the door.

"Now what do we do?" Christian asked sullenly from the couch. Lissa leaned into him and hid her face in his shoulder.

"We wait," I told all of them, sitting on a chair. They huffed, not liking the fact that they have to sit there and wait. I wasn't a big fan of it either.

"There is nothing we can do?" Mia asked softly.

"There is nothing we can do." I stated feeling as hopeless as ever.

"Dimitri, maybe you should get some sleep, we will tell you if anything comes up." Eddie told me, his eyes sympathetic. I shook my head though, denying his offer. "Really Dimitri, you haven't slept a wink since Rose got kidnapped, you need rest if you want to find her."

"Do you blame me?" I muttered, running my hand through my hair.

"No, but you look like you are about to pass out, we will wake you if anything happens." I hesitated, looking at him before nodding and getting up.

"I don't care if it something small, wake me if _anything _turns up." I told them, before walking to the room that Janine wasn't occupying. Rose's room.

I walked in and was immediately hit with her scent, my steps stuttered before I breathed in deeply and walked in. I ran my hand along the seam of her mattress where we sat and talked before. I looked over at her dresser and saw the camera and picture album sitting there.

Walking over, I picked up the camera, setting it down on the desk, and then picked up the album. I walked over to the bed and sat down, putting one of Rose's pillows in my lap. I breathed in her scent before opening the album.

The first picture was a beautiful woman with dirty blonde hair and blue eyes. She had a narrow face, with a dimple on her left cheek. Her eyes were happy and amused, most likely amused at the girl behind the camera, Rose. She had a strict but loving aura around her.

I looked on the back of the picture and smiled. It was her Aunt Alberta. I turned the page again and a younger version of Rose. She and her Aunt were close together, trying to fit into the center of the camera as Rose's little arm held it out and pointed towards them.

I turned the page again and saw a picture of a tree, I didn't really see anything special about it, but to Rose...it probably had a lot of meaning. I noticed a bird's nest on one of the branches but that was the only thing that stood out.

Turning the page, I saw a picture of a door. I turned the page, seeing if it would give me a description of what the door meant. It said nothing on it which confused me. The picture was in black and white too which could mean it was old.

I turned the page again…and again and again and again, each picture beautiful and held lots of meaning that I didn't know. The album started to have fewer pictures of her in it, and soon the album was filled of pictures of her friends and landscapes. There was a beautiful photo of a plain snowy field with no trees or bushes, just the white landscape…

And a girl kneeling in the middle, she had straight platinum blonde hair and a small figure. Her legs were under her as her hands uncovered a beautiful red flower in the middle of the snow. The figure reminded me vaguely of Lissa, but I wasn't sure.

The picture however was beautiful, showing me how great of a photographer Rose really was. It was a passion that was held so strong in her grasp that no one could take it away from her.

Except somebody did…Nathan. He took away her passion, her happiness, and now she is in his grasp again. Cowering in fear and terror, because he has her life in his hands and she can't do anything about it.

I needed to find her…alive…if it's the last thing I do.

**RPOV**

It hurts. Physically…emotionally…and it even hurts psychologically. I wished for death many times in the past week, but surprisingly, it never came. No matter how weak I was from the blood loss or from the lack of food and water, I was never at death's door.

He visited me daily, sometimes even twice a day. When he was in a bad mood, he was harsher and stayed longer to take out his frustrations. I cried non-stop the first couple of days, until my tears ran out. Now I lay on my bed, trying not to move or talk. Even a twitch of my finger made me gasp in pain, and then the gasp would make me cry in pain, and then my voice would hurt the cuts on my chest.

It was a no win situation.

When he was happy, however, he stayed for a short amount of time and didn't cut me. I was happy for those times. He never dressed after the first night; no I was made to lie naked on the bed, with dried blood lingering around me.

He didn't have a routine either, he made surprise visits. I didn't know the time or the date, it could have been weeks, or even months, but I didn't know.

There was nothing to listen to either, or see, it was black and soundless. I sometimes found myself wondering if I was in a soundproof room.

At the moment, I had my eyes closed, trying to block out the agony that currently withheld my body. I wanted to sleep, but if he found me sleeping he would beat me. I took shallow breaths, trying little to breathe so that my chest wouldn't rise.

I heard the door open and tensed. I usually did. He entered slowly, and I saw frustration in his eyes. He crouched so that he was right above me.

"You know what they did?" He asked threateningly. I didn't answer, not knowing what he was talking about. Anger lit his face and he slapped me hard on the face. I whimpered looking up at him frightened.

"They went to my sister, my innocent sister so that they could find you. They threatened to lock her up if she didn't tell them where I was keeping you. It was incredibly stupid of them, because now I have to take it out on you." He whispered, grabbing my hair.

"Please," I sobbed, "you had your way with me, you got revenge on my mother, just let my father and me go."

"I did get revenge Rosemarie, and I will release your father. He is nothing to me now. As for you though, I am quite fond of you." He ran a hand down my face.

"Please Nathan," I had went as low as to beg, but I was that helpless.

"I'll think about it, but for now I have some tension I need to release." And so he continued what he came for. I blocked it out, coming back when the door closed behind him. Something caught my eye however, right when he was about to close the door.

A small window sat on the floor on the left wall. It was dark, which didn't give me much hope of what lay beyond it. When the door closed, it became dark once more. I pulled on the ropes, the first time I tried to release myself since day one.

I tugged hard, not expecting my hand to slip through the rough texture. A sob of relief left my mouth and I looked at my free hand, seeing the blood slick over my wrists. The rope must have been so damp with the blood that it loosened.

I did the same thing on my other hand, this one slighter harder to get out of. My body was on fire, the struggle almost making me black out. I kept my bearings however and freed my other hand. I tried to sit up but I was too weak to do that.

_Dimitri, think of Dimitri and your mom and your dad._ My body shook and I clamped my lips shut as I quickly flew my body forward. I put my hands over my mouth and screamed loudly.

I felt like I was in hell, and stars were dancing over my features. The tears that I thought I had lost, came pouring down my face.

I took a long time, but I managed to free both of my legs also. Ignoring the cuts, I folded into myself, sobbing.

_You have to go Rose, you need to try and escape. It might be the only way to free your dad and get Nathan in jail. Leave, find an address, but don't stay there._

The voice that I heard sounded vaguely like Dimitri's and I sobbed at it. Knowing he was right, I looked over to the wall that held my freedom and slid down onto the cold floor. I landed it a hard heap, the pain making me freeze in agony.

I used all of the strength I had to pull myself towards the wall, my hands searching for the window I had seen. When I felt something like cool metal, I tugged on it and felt a cold wind hit my face. I thrust the window open painfully, looking out. The first thing I saw was grass, tall grass, the only thing probably covering the light.

I cried in relief and pulled through the window, scraping all of my cuts over the metal. IT didn't stop me, however, because I was soon lying in the grass staring up at the night sky. I pulled myself so that I was in a standing position, failing multiple times, before I leaned on the building and looking over the grass.

All I noticed was grass, but in the distance, I saw lights. I wanted to smile and jump with joy but I was still in danger, I took one step towards my rescue before falling to the ground once more. Looking behind me, I turned towards the window and shut it closed.

I turned back around and started crawling towards my freedom.

**I hope this fed your cravings well enough, thank you for the people who reviewed my last chapter, here is the next chapter that you wanted. Please leave a review to wish me luck for my games tomorrow!:D**


	17. Chapter 17

**Thanks for all the reviews last chapter! Maybe I can get to 215 this chapter =D I don't know though...but this chapter has alot of action and mystery and its sad.:'( Please read and review(: ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

I don't know how long that I crawled, or how far either. I wasn't able to stand up to see where I was, so I continued to crawl.

I didn't hear anything either, every time I heard the softest whisper I would stop and cower in fear, thinking that he was back and was going to kill me.

I had to stop, twice, but only for a few seconds before I started going again, it was pure torture and agony. Escaping felt like I was walking towards my death, I just needed to find a phone or something, even a house.

I tilted my head up and looked at the sky; it was starting to lighten up, but only slightly, which meant that dawn was soon approaching. My naked body continued forward though, and it felt like ages before I saw something coming towards me.

I whimpered and closed my eyes as I hid in the grass. A few seconds later, I felt something sniffing my hair. I continued to lie there, hoping the beast would leave quickly and not kill me. I wasn't so lucky, however, because soon enough I heard a voice calling through the air.

"What you have there boy?" A man's voice said, a strong country accent slipping through his words. I felt a tear fall down my face, thinking that it was one of Nathan's minions. "What the- Doreene!"

I didn't know the name he screamed, or what was happening, but soon I was being turned so that my face was turned upwards. I would have opened my eyes, but when I felt myself being lifted I felt myself start to black out from the tears and cuts.

"Ma'am, are you awake? Come on sweetheart, open your eyes," the man said pleadingly. I felt him start to carry me forwards, and I wanted to squirm out of his rough hands, because they reminded me greatly of Nathan's.

I felt a scream start rising in my throat, but it died when I couldn't open my mouth to do it. I was left to face the agony my mind was throwing at me while the strange man carried me on.

"Oh dear," a women's voice called from a few feet away. I heard shuffling and then a door open. A strong smell of oranges and pine filled my nose and I let it wash over me. "Put her on the couch John."

He huffed as he sat me down softly, and then I felt something cool and wet start to run over my body. It felt like heaven and I wanted to thank whoever was doing it but I couldn't find my voice.

"Call the police John, we need to bring her into the hospital now." The women said from beside me, helping me make the connection that it was her wiping me down.

She tried to get me to open my eyes a couple times, but I was slowly losing consciousness as she spoke. I took one breath before my senses cut off completely.

**DPOV**

It didn't work; the police called the house the next day and explained that the sister knew nothing about the whereabouts of her brother. I think she was lying, no, I know she was lying.

All I did was sit on the couch with my head in my hands thinking. I didn't know what else to do. The others left me to think, but they continued to sit around me quietly. I had no idea what was going to happen, it would be a miracle if Rose got out of this alive, and if she didn't…

_Stop Dimitri, you will never get through this if you continue thinking that she is gone. _I scolded myself in my head. I looked up and stared at the wall in front of me, looking at the picture that was there of her and Lissa as they held their thumbs up in front of the house.

I was in the middle of sighing for the thousandth time when the phone rang shrilly. Everyone jumped, including me, but I was the one that answered it.

"Hello?"

"I'm calling for a Mrs. Hathaway," a woman said over the phone. I turned to Janine, confused, and held the phone towards her.

She took it slowly and held it to her ear. She confirmed her name and listened to what the women was telling her. We all stared at her as tears started falling down her face at extremely fast pace. She gave one worded responses before thanking her and hanging up.

Before we knew it, Janine was running towards the door in her plain t-shirt and jeans. We all got up to follow her and I had to grab her arm to stop her.

"What is going on?" I exclaimed as she turned towards me with a crazy look in her eyes.

"They found him! They found him!" She exclaimed, wrenching her arm free. I hurried to get in the car besides her, knowing she wouldn't object and made a motion for the others to follow us. They ran to their cars and got in, hurrying to catch up with Janine's fast driving.

"They found your husband?" I asked her. She nodded her head, tears continuing to fall down her face. We took a few quick rights before pulling the car up to the hospital. She got out and ran towards the building.

I waited for the others before we followed her inside. We found her yelling at the nurse fiercely, and Lissa explained to the nurse that this was Mrs. Hathaway-Mazur. She nodded and cautiously walked us towards a room in down the hall.

A woman in a black suit was waiting outside of the door and she opened it for Janine, letting her barrel through. Janine ran towards the bed and kneeled on the floor, embracing the man on the bed.

She sobbed his name repeatedly, and I ushered everybody out so that they could have time to themselves.

"A man found him in an alley a few streets away; we brought him in immediately and checked for id. We called Janine Hathaway's house but when she didn't answer we called his daughter's house." The women explained.

"Is there any words from where Rose Hathaway is?" I asked hopefully.

"No sir, all traces of her are gone." She said sadly. I nodded my head and leaned against the wall.

"Thank you, and what is wrong with Mr. Mazur?" I asked, my eyes glancing towards the door.

"He has a concussion and some broken ribs and a broken wrist and ankle. There has been internal bleeding in his chest and has series of cut around his body. He is unconscious at the moment but thankfully is not in a coma." She answered me, shaking her head. She didn't say anything more, and after a few moments she left us.

I turned towards the others and saw Lissa crying into Christian's arms. She looked up at me and shook her head.

"We won't be able to find her will we?" She whispered, her words hitting every one of us. I felt a tear hit my face before I slid down the wall.

"I don't know Lissa, I don't know anymore."

I hated it, not knowing where she was, but I could feel my body winding down. I didn't know what to do anymore, I felt like I was losing her. I tried to keep my grasp on her but to no use.

Was this it? Were they going to drop the case?

And what about Mr. Mazur? Did this mean that Rose gave Nathan everything she could? Does this mean that he got revenge on Janine? He hurt Rose, he possible killed her and sent Abe as a way of saying, you can him back, but your daughter is gone forever.

Silence filled the room as reality finally hit.

**RPOV**

I woke up with an annoying beeping in my ear. I turned on my side and looked at the machine that it was coming from, wanting to throw it at the wall. I forgot about it, however, when someone knocked and opened the room.

"Oh, good, you're awake," the man said walking in further. My eyes scrunched together, looking around the room again before resting my eyes back on him.

_Why was I in a hospital? What happened to me?_

"Who are you?" I asked, my voice croaking uncomfortably. He gave me a soft smile before writing something on his clipboard.

"I'm Dr. Hallows," he told me, his eyes looking back at me with a soft expression. The way he was moving and talking was like he was being cautious and wary.

"Why am I here?" I asked him, looking around.

"You don't remember?" Dr. Hallows asked surprised and slightly afraid. I shook my head wondering why he seemed so scared of me.

"Miss, you were brought into the hospital early this morning because you were found in a field by a couple living in a house. They found who with blood all over your body and you looked dead." He told me softly.

I froze, my breath leaving me. I was bloody? I looked dead? _What the hell happened to me? _

"What happened?" I asked scared, "I don't know what's going on." I cried, my eyes watering. Dr. Hallows grabbed a chair and sat next me, resting a hand on my arm.

"Hun, when they brought you into the hospital you were tested and we found out that you were severely raped multiple times. You have four broken ribs and a large concussion on the back of your head. You also have been cut with what seems to be a knife and need stiches on several parts of your body." He told me slowly.

"_What? _No, this isn't happening, I would have remembered this. I wasn't _raped. _That isn't possible!" I shouted, starting to get up, but I couldn't.

Every single bone in my body was in agony and I started to see stars. I looked down and saw my mutated skin covered roughly with black, purple, red, and blue bruises. I started sobbing and looking at the rest of my body while the Doctor waited.

"This can't be happening," I cried, looking back at him. He nodded his head and touched my arm softly.

"I need to ask a question, you don't remember any of this happening? You don't remember your attackers face or name?" He asked me, holding a pen to his paper.

"NO! I don't remember anything!" I told him, feeling like I was in a dream.

"One more question, we could not id you when you came in, but I need to know your name so we can call family or friends to know tell them where to find you." I continued to cry but this time it was from fear and confusion.

"It's…it's…my name is…I don't know!" I exclaimed, feeling my body shaking. I felt confused, alone, scared, and in pain. I wanted to go to bed and wake up to find that I was dreaming.

"You don't know your name?" He asked slowly. I shook my head, closing my eyes. I heard him mutter something before he scribbled something down.

"Okay, I'm going to give you something for the pain; we will figure this out in time." He poked a needle in a pouch of fluid above my head and I could instantly feel my body numbing in pain.

"Don't worry, everything will be figured out," Dr. Hallows told me before he walked out of the room leaving one word hanging in the air.

"Amnesia."

I have amnesia.

I couldn't come to terms with the word. I started searching for memories, but none were coming to mind. I didn't even remember what I looked like.

When my body became numb enough to move without pain, I picked up the blanket and looked at the rest of my body. I gagged as I saw my ribs protruding through my stomach and then the bruising coming from the spots where it was broken. I had scar littering my body and stitches where I needed them.

Amnesia.

The one word floated in my head. My name is...my name is…

My mother is…my mother is…

My father is… my father is…

"I don't know!" I cried, finally voicing my words. I didn't know anything; it felt like I was having an out of body experience. I had all of my memories locked up somewhere but I didn't know where they were. I just wanted to search until I found them and then yell 'hey you! Yeah can I have my memories back now?'

I don't even know my own name!

I want to go home, but I don't know where home is. I wanted something to eat, but I don't know what foot I liked. I wanted to call my mom, but I didn't know her number or name.

I wanted everything that I didn't even know I had. I didn't want to step outside though, because then I was scared that my attacker would show up and kill me. I didn't even know why he did it in the first place.

What am I going to do?

**What is she going to do? Please review and tell me what you think she is going to do! I already know where I am going with this and I hope to update soon. Keyword:hope. REVIEW(:**


	18. Chapter 18

**Thanks everyone! I reached my goal! Maybe now I can set it for 230...? This is a sad chapter and a slight filler chapter for Rose. I hope you like...(: ENJOY!**

**RPOV **

"Okay let's try again, listen to my voice and control your breathing. Good, now I am going to ask a question and I need to you to say the first thing that comes to mind." Dr. Hersh told me as she sat in the chair in front of me. I stared at her vacantly, waiting for the question like I did the last four hundred times I tried. It was always the same question, but I always had different answers.

"Okay, what is your mom's name?"

"Um…Karen? No! That's not it either! I don't know!" I exclaimed exasperated, leaning my head down so that is rested between my knees. I took a couple deeps breaths, a technique that Dr. Hersh taught me, before looking back up.

"Don't stress yourself honey, these are just practice runs. You're not going to remember everything at one time. It's going to take time to recant all your memories." She told me sympathetically. I sighed, rubbing my cheek with the palm of my hand. I flinched slightly at the sting that emanated from the bruises around my cheek but didn't remove my hand.

"I wish it didn't," I told her tiredly. She smiled at me and closed the little notebook that she was writing in.

"I know sweetie, how about I get one of the nurses to take you back to your room now, I think that is enough for today." She told me, pressing a button on her desk. I nodded and waited as I did every day for the nurse to stroll in and take her sweet time to wheel me back.

I couldn't walk yet, I was still weak, and if I could I would be in crutches anyways. I had a fractured ankle and a broken wrist that were still healing. I still had bruises and scars littering my body but the bruises were slowly turning a disgusting yellow and brown. The scars, however, are now pink, jagged lines across my skin.

The first day I looked at my body, I was horrified. A nurse was standing beside me when I needed assistance to take a bath. A mirror happened to be in my line of vision and I had to throw up many times. There was one scar though that seemed weeks older than the ones marring the rest of my skin. It made me think that I had gotten it differently than the others.

I had some meat growing in my stomach too. The doctors and nurses made sure that I ate heartily and healthy. So they would bring me a large trey of cafeteria food and then some vitamins to take with my water. My ribs weren't protruding out of my stomach anymore, thank god.

I had been in the hospital for three weeks and two days. The first week I was on bed rest, but the remaining days I was allowed to use a wheel chair, though I needed to be assisted by a nurse or Doctor at all times.

Dr. Hersh was my therapist/ doctor that worked here at the hospital. He was the best person they knew that could help me, so I allowed them privilege to let him come. He started by coming to my room and asking me questions and doing exercises like the one that we just did. Soon I needed to leave my room so I offered to go to his office instead.

Doreene and John McNeil were the couple that found me and brought me to the hospital. I looked pretty bad when John had found me, and Doreene told me that she cleaned me up some until the ambulance came to get me.

I am forever in their gratitude. Without them I would be dead, or worse; my attacker could have got me and tortured me some more if they hadn't come to the rescue. They came by every day to check up on me and they told me things about themselves. I couldn't return the favor but they didn't seem to mind.

I learned that they are both farmers and live in the country. I also found out that I was to the west of Oregon. The Pacific Ocean was close by which helped farmers receive fertile soil in the planting season.

I learned that they were married but didn't have any children. They were very sweet and they were the kindest people I have ever met. When they walked into the room, a huge smile would grace my lips and we would talk to each other for a couple hours before nurses kicked them out so that I could rest.

They would make sure to come after or before my sessions with my therapist, which was either 8 to 12 or 3 to 7. I would inform them about my sessions, trying not to act disappointed about my failures so far.

So as I sat in her office, I felt like I was never going to remember anything that I was going to have to start a new life, and I didn't like that. I looked sadly and the cream colored carpet and waited until the door opened.

"Hi honey," Nurse Jackie said walking into the room. I smiled at her softly before it wouldn't hold up anymore and it dropped. Jackie was my favorite nurse and she is the one that I wanted to take care of my because she knew what she was doing.

"Hi Jackie," I said, the words leaving my lips without emotion. She gave me a sad smile before walking around me and started pushing me towards the door. We made the journey in silence, neither of us having anything to say.

"Mr. and Mrs. McNeil are here already," she told, turning down the hall that led to my room. I nodded mutely, dropping my head in my hand again.

"Hi John, Doreene," I called when my eyes caught sight of them. A smile lit Doreene's face, her laugh lines perking slightly. John was a little shyer around people so he just gave me a welcoming nod.

"Hi sweetheart, so is anything new?" Doreene asked excitedly. I shook my head and I could see her lips fall ever so slightly. "Don't worry, these things take time."

"How much? I have been searching for everything and anything for the past three weeks and nothing has so much as flickered in my head." I stated grouchily. She sighed, her smile finally dropping and she went to helped me back onto my bed silently. I saw John leave the room out of the corner of my eye.

"You know, maybe your amnesia has something to do with what happened to you. Your brain might me holding your memories back from you because you don't feel safe yet." She whispered once I was comfortable. I rested my head back against the pillows staring at the ceiling.

"When will I be safe?" I whispered to her.

"I don't know sweetie, only you do," she told me, her voice drifting my eyes from the ceiling and towards her.

"Thank you Doreene, for everything," I told her smiling. She returned it easily, her freckled cheeks wrinkling. She was only thirty years old, and her youth was still alive and beautiful. Her hair was wispy blonde, tucked behind her ears; she had small blue eyes that squinted slightly when she smiled. She also always wore plaid, but they matched her perfectly.

"Of course, you are a beautiful and wonderful girl, I hate what you have had to go through, but if there is anything you need…I'll be here every day." I felt my eyes water slightly at her warm words and hurried to dry them with the palms of my hands. "I should leave before we both start crying." She noted making us both laugh.

"Bye Doreene, tell John to stay away from the butterscotch now," she laughed and kissed my forehead before leaving. From the door, I saw Doreene tell John something which made him laugh, look into the room, and wave.

They were gone seconds later, leaving alone with my friend mister drip. I closed my eyes trying to find some sleep, seeing as there was nothing better to do. It took time, but I was soon drifting off to the silence around my room.

**DPOV**

It has been three weeks since Rose was kidnapped. There has been no sightings of her at all and my hope was about to be gone. I have barely slept in days, and when I do, I have nightmares of the night she was taken.

They went to Nathan's sister's house and we found that she has no knowledge of where her brother could be he hadn't contacted her in years. The only hope left was Rose's father, Abe, and the first thing the police did when he woke up was question him on the whereabouts of Nathan.

He immediately told them where the place was located, saying that he almost escaped one night but his men got him before he could get away. The police headed straight for the place and we found Nathan and his men easily, but something wasn't right.

They traveled the whole warehouse but Rose wasn't in any room, one room had a single bed with chain on the four edges that looks like someone had been chained there. I was choking with anger when the police told us that.

They also said that they walls and bed were soaked with blood. They had some of the blood tested and to my complete anger found out that it was indeed Rose's blood.

They questioned Nathan, but he wouldn't speak, he only had a sly smirk on his face, like he got what he wanted. They sent him to court and he was found guilty, he didn't even defend himself. We were all at the trial and when they said he was guilty, none of us cheered or sighed in relief, because our friend and sister were still missing.

Lissa cried continuously, and so did everyone else. None of us knew what to do. The police continued to investigate but after the three week mark, they were thinking of announcing her…dead.

None of us believed she was dead, but we had nothing else to go off of, Nathan wasn't speaking along with every single one of his minions. After two weeks the police found something around the edge of the building. The grass was so tall around there that they had to really look to see the blood marks staining the grass.

They followed the trail but after time, it abruptly ended. They figured Nathan had found her and brought her back and when they questioned Nathan about Rose's escape, her only smile and said 'she got what she deserved.'

This made there advance towards death much clearer. There were no new leads and they were losing hope in finding anything at all. We waited every day for any word about her but all of us were turning into empty carcasses.

"Mama, I don't know what to do anymore," I told her over the phone. "It's like she has disappeared leaving blood behind her. All of the police are telling me that she is dead, but something tells me if I give up then she really is…"

"Dimka," she replied, "this girl, Rose, it seems that some things can't be helped. You can't go into denial; it's not good for you. Maybe it's time to come to terms with what has happened…"

"I can't, she was…is something that came into my life out of nowhere, she lit my world up with a single look and I've come to know her over the weeks that I've lived here. Letting her go like that is impossible," I told her miserably. I leaned my head back against the wall of Rose's bedroom. I haven't let it in days, wanting to keep her smell and her memories locked within.

"You love her?" She asked sadly, hoping for something that I couldn't resist.

"Yes Mama, I fell for her…hard." I choked out, tears straining against my eyes for release. Her intake of breath was audible and silence fell amongst us.

"I'm so sorry Dimka," she whispered, letting me know that she was indeed crying.

"Don't worry Mama; I'll talk to you soon." I told her before hanging up. I put my phone on Rose's nightstand and stared at the wall across from me. It held no interest though, because I held a picture in my hand of Rose. It was few years; she looked to be in college. She was wearing a red cocktail dress and heels and her hair was lying loose around her shoulders. She had a sexy grin on her face that I have never seen before and she looked more relaxed then I have ever seen in a while.

"Dimitri?" The door opened slightly at the sound of her voice. I turned my head but didn't meet her eyes.

"You heard?" I asked her quietly. She nodded out of my peripheral, her blonde hair fanning around her face angelically.

"Did she know?" Lissa asked, walking in and sitting on the edge of the bed. I shook my head, letting it fall so my hair covered my face slightly.

"Now she won't ever know," I whispered, biting my lip harshly. She released a sob which made me turn and embrace my love's best friend.

"This is really happening? She really is dead?" She sobbed in my arms. I tightened my hold on her, not answering. "I don't know how I'm going to keep going if she isn't going to be here. She's my best friend," she whispered.

Tears fell out of my eyes when I couldn't hold them in any longer. With though, I decided to make a decision only Rose would believe was right.

"One thing is you need to have your wedding, she would want that for you," I told her, pulling away slightly. Lissa looked up at me with big doe eyes shining with tears. She looked at me before nodding her head slightly.

"Your right," was her only reply.

We stayed like that in silence, our thoughts running off in different directions about the same person. She left soon though giving me a small smile of gratitude before she left, leaving me in silence once more.

A few days later, the police called, calling off the search. Our hopes vanished; we had nothing else to hold one to. Rose was pronounced dead… and it felt like I was too.

Janine and Abe came to Rose's house when Abe was released, both of them were teary eyed and heartbroken. Abe believed it was his entire fault…as did Abe. Abe was dressed in a black shirt and black pants, giving off a scary and darkening emotion. We all shied away from him, but he was just like us, mourning someone close to him.

He was a very decent guy, and when word got out about my feeling towards his daughter, he grabbed my hand and squeezed hard. I nodded at his vacant eyes and let him release my hold easily.

The funeral was a few days later, and it was the scariest and saddest day of my life, worse than what happened to Ivan in Russia. I left the church that day crying, followed by Lissa and Christian behind me, and the rest of Rose's friends behind them. Janine and Abe were in front of me, holding each other tight. I was the only one without a partner, and I would be for a long time.

It wasn't every day that someone you realize you love is dead in a matter of weeks. You feel heartbroken, torn-apart, and hollow. There are no words, only the memories if Rose and what could have been.

**Aww Dimitri...you doesn't know what happened. No one knows what happened, but don't worry...fate has funny ways of working(; Please review and I hope everyone is enjoying a good SUPERBOWL game:D**


	19. Chapter 19

**Thank you for waiting for my next chapter and for letting my last mistake slid away slowly. This chapter isn't very long but it has some action inside so please read and I hope inside will answer some of her questions a couple of chapter ago!(: ENJOY! **

**RPOV**

I don't hear bad news like this every week, but for me…that is all I hear. The Doctor told me yesterday that my blood tests and DNA tests were being kept on hold. Apparently there is an even bigger murder problem going on and they need to figure who the person was that was killed. It was a she, and she was burnt beyond recognition…from what the doctor told me.

He said that it could be a matter of months before my results would come back. I mean come on! It's a simple process! Test it, scan it, and my name should pop up onto the computer. Simple as that!

I was beyond agitated at this point and Doreene's presence wasn't even putting a smile on my face like she usually could. I just wanted to know who I was already.

There hasn't even been any missing person's report either. The police scanned the files of surrounding areas and states and found nothing. It's like I came out of nowhere!

This also freaked me out, who was I before this happened? Did I have family friends? Or was I by myself…a loner that lived in the house next door.

I didn't know.

The therapist continued to talk and work with me, but I wasn't getting anywhere and all I wanted to do was scream into my pillow and rip my hair out.

Right now, I was lying in my uncomfortable hospital bed, the only thing I have to call mine, staring up at the ceiling. I bit my lip and turned again on my side, trying to get comfortable so that the springs weren't stabbing me in my bruises and cuts.

I had no luck.

I thought about the last two days, thinking of how antsy John and Doreene seemed to be. The nerves crept into me slightly, and whenever I asked them what was wrong they would give me a quick answer and smile.

I wondered what they were hiding from me, but I didn't have any clue of what it could be. I knew they would be here soon, checking on me at the same time as usual, with smiles on their faces.

"Hey hun!" Doreene called, five minutes later on schedule. I smiled at her, her excitement seeping into my skin. I didn't know why she was so happy, but when I looked over Doreene's shoulder when she was hugging me, John nodded and winked.

"How are you today Sweetie?" John asked warmly, sitting down on the chair by the bed. Doreene skipped the other chair and sat down on my bed.

"I'm better, they weighed me again and I gained five pounds since last week." I told both of them, knowing that Doreene wanted to know as well. They grinned and congratulated me happily.

They had been her for at least half an hour when Doreene glanced over and John and he nodded mutely. I pulled myself a little higher in my bed and gave them a curious look. We had been talking about life at their house and how fun it is when their cow Koko acts like a bull and runs towards the chickens.

"Okay, hun, John and I have a question for you. The doctor already approved of it and we talked to a lawyer and agent over the phone so we knew if it would be okay, but…would you like to come live with us?" She spun out quickly, clasping her hands together hopefully. A flash of emerald eyes lit up my eyes before Doreene's blue ones shone bright once more.

Her question caught me off guard and I think I was worrying her by how I froze in shock. She looked at John, biting her lip softly.

"You-you want me to stay with you?" I asked, my voice trembling. I didn't realize how much this meant to me. Doreene and John were the only two people that I have grown close to since I woke up here. They have cared for me so much and they were the sweetest people in the world.

Why would they want to take me in; a torn, messed-up girl who was violently attacked and could be attacked again at any given time.

"Of course honey, we know that you don't like it very well staying here at the hospital and we thought that we would give you the chance to sleep in a real bed and eat real food." John said, his slightly burned skin, after working out in the field all day, crinkling slightly with his smile.

"I don't know what to say," I whispered, looking down. I didn't want them to see me crying, but I was so happy. Only a week ago did I realize that my age was close to hers maybe off by at least five years, and she acted my age and we talked a lot like two gossiping girls. She never made me feel awkward and never made me feel like I was her daughter, we were friends.

"Yes would be good," Doreene said biting her lip.

Tears streamed down my face and I laughed happily. "Yes," I told them smiling. They grinned and pulled me into a hug, keeping me there for a few seconds.

"This is going to be so much fun, we can show you around the pasture and we own do many fields that we lost track of, but some we still plant on even if it isn't our property but we know almost everyone so…I'm talking too much again." She blushed looking down while John and I laughed.

"That would be great!" I told her as John grabbed her hand and kissed her softly.

"There is one condition though," John warned after our excitement calmed down. "You have to stay here until you reach average weight again and your leg heals, but even then you will be in a wheelchair."

I frowned, thinking about how long that would take, it would at least be three more weeks, but I think I could live with that. John and Doreene stayed longer after that before they had to go home and feed all of their animals. I thanked them again and told them goodnight before smiling and lying back in bed.

This is the best good news ever. I not only trust Doreene and John to keep me safe, but I know that they will care for me like I care for them right now, because as far as I know, they are the only friends I got.

**DPOV**

It has been quiet, sober, and hollow in the house, but it might be because I was the only one living in it. Janine and Abe, once he was released, traveled back their house to mourn the loss of their daughter by themselves.

Lissa and Christian stayed at their house along with everyone else. They all trusted me to take care of Rose's house…until I left that it.

Christian called me yesterday and told me that Lissa and he were going to move the wedding to next year. It was too soon to plan and wedding and they needed time to heal from the loss they had.

I haven't seen Lissa smile in a long time, the once fun and excited girl I once knew is now depressed and empty, but I couldn't really complain seeing as I was that way, or worse. I couldn't keep staying in this house much longer, my pain was only increasing.

So I decided to travel back to Russia to be with my family and continue my work. It was the only thing that could keep my mind occupied and away from Rose.

Rose…I missed her every day, pieces and pieces of my heart continue to shatter and I didn't know how much of it will be left in a few months. I was slowly deteriorating from the inside.

My plan leaves tomorrow, leaving me time to pack and get ready. I already called Lissa and told her and Christian that I was leaving and to tell the others goodbye for him. I was already ready now, and I walked in Rose's room like I did every five minutes and looked around at ever thing that was in it.

I opened up her album and flipped through it until I found the one that I liked. I pulled it out and stared at it, memorizing it and sealing it in my memory. It was beautiful…it was Rose.

She stood by the edge of the pier, leaning against the railing towards the water. The moon was low in the side and was centered on her right side, illuminating her face and eyes. She wore a white sundress and her hair was down and flowing around her as it tangled with the wind in a soft dance. Her smile was warm and happy and she was holding a red rose, the only color in the picture, close to her chest with both hands. Her dark skin melted with the gray skin and she was bare-footed, one foot resting flat while the other was bent at the knee and rested on her toes. The edges of her dress at the bottom fluttered behind her and she looked to the side of the camera.

It was my favorite picture, and I knew if I was there taking the picture I would have wrapped her up in my arms and kissed her passionately, commenting to her how beautiful and breath-taking she looked. I wanted to pick her up and cradle her to my chest, never breaking the kiss and carry down towards the sand, finding a deserted place under the pier and take her magically with all the love that I could.

I was torturing myself, I knew I was, but the images were so badly burned in my head that there was no way I was going to be able to think about anything but. I folded the picture in half and slid in into my pocket, keeping it for later.

When I closed the photo album, I slid it into her bookshelf and stared at it in content. It would always stay there until the next person opens up Rose's life story and see's the girl behind the camera, left to think about the secrets that were left in her bright eyes, or the mischief that could be seen by the quirk in her lips.

I walked over and picked up her camera, sliding it into its case and sealing it shut. I carried it over my shoulder and towards my room, stashing it with my other belongings. That camera did not deserve to go rusty or old, and I wanted to be the one to take good care of it.

I sat down on my bed and closed my eyes, my head never leaving the memories that were sure to stay with me for a long time.

**Unknown POV**

I looked at the man sitting in the chair across from me. Phones were by each of our ears and he was releasing a malicious smile.

"Are the eggs gone?" I asked him, using the code words that we had come up with.

"Of course, but what I don't get is why you let the pancakes burn, instead of stopping them and eating them." He replied, eyebrows clenched together, and tilting his head slightly closer.

"Doesn't matter because they are burnt now, and all the knives know it. I don't know what happened to them really but I know that they wouldn't have survived by themselves by how torn up they looked." I told him smiling cruelly. He returned it before an officer opened a door and motioned him out.

"Don't forget the plan," I mouthed as the officer turned away, my head was tilted so that the cameras wouldn't catch my lips moving. I hated prisons.

He nodded once before he left out the door. A smirked marked my face as my officer and watchmen grabbed my handcuffed hands and took me back to my block.

That girl was dead, she couldn't have gotten far with the amount of damage I did to her body. I decided that it would be best if everyone thought that I killed her, so I had my little sidekick go in the police office undetected and destroy any records on the database of Rosemarie Hathaway.

He made sure to delete every single reminisce of her through each bordering state. No one will see a missing sign, or will look for the body of a girl when they don't know to be looking for it. The case has already been dropped by the station here and now we have erased all other signs of her what so ever.

It was like she doesn't exist, she's not alive, and she's dead and now I have fully gave Janine Hathaway and Abe Mazur the revenge they deserved.

The loss of the daughter.

I doesn't matter that I'm in jail…I felt content that my revenge is done.

**Please Review! I have been getting awesome reviews and I can't believe that this story is getting so many reviews and I am jumping up and down in excitement! Thank you everyone that has been reviewing and please do continue:D Till next time(;**


	20. Chapter 20

**Thank you everyone for the reviews last chapter, they made me happy! This chapter is only Rose and its time to meet a few new people..or three hot cowboys to be exact. Don't worry though, there to young for Rose (; Dimitri is still the one and only, Rose just needs to remember and yes..this chapter she will remember one tiny little thing...ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

The doctor continued to write on his clipboard as I waited for him to finish his last examination. It had been four weeks since Doreene and John asked me to live with them. I have been eating each meal they have given me and even asked for snacks sometimes just so I could reach my healthy weight average sooner.

My leg wasn't broken anymore, but it was still very sore and I couldn't walk on it at all. They subscribed me a wheelchair yesterday and I was already learning to steer my way around the hospital.

Today I was being released and I was more than excited to finally leave the hospital. Doreene was here to take me back to her house while John was working out in the fields.

"Okay," Dr. Hallows's said, pulling me out of my thoughts, "I believe we are done here." I smiled widely at him and started bouncing in my seat.

"I can go now?" I asked happily, my hands moving towards the wheels of my wheelchair.

"Yes, let me get your prescription and I will give it to Mrs. McNeil for you," he told me before walking out the door. I sat there and waited for Doreene and in less than 5 minutes she was at my door.

"Are you ready Sweetie?" She said as she walking quickly towards me. I smiled and said yes, allowing her to grab the handles and start pushing me forward.

"I wish I knew my name, it would be easier for you wouldn't it?" I told her, my voice grouchy as I rested my head on my hand.

"It will come in time," she told me patting my shoulder comfortingly. I sighed, not responding as she pushing me through the hospital doors and into the sunlight. As I was staring to my left, I noticed a beautiful garden in front of the hospital. I was staring at the flowers confused and I felt Doreene stop and look at where I was staring.

"Those are beautiful flowers," she said smiling. "I have a garden at home too; maybe you can help me plant some of the flowers I just bought the other day, well if you like to. I bought some Daffodils, Daisy, Sunflowers, Roses-"she would have kept on listing if the last flower she named didn't hit me in the chest.

"Roses?" I asked her, feeling a prickling in my brain.

"Yes, I planted some a few years back, there was one and it turned into a beautiful white Rose with black tips. It was unique and I have a picture of it at home…" I let her continue talking but I was lost in my thoughts, trying to figure out why 'Rose' was making me feel weird.

"-rose," my head snapped up as she finished, and after not listening to what she was saying it sounded like she called me _Rose. _

"Did you call me Rose?" I asked her in a small voice.

"No- what's wrong?" She asked moving so that she was in front of me.

"I think…I think that's my name," I said my eyes wide and shocked. She gaped at me for a few seconds until a smile lit up her face.

"Oh honey that's wonderful!" She exclaimed, hugging me. I sat there in shock for a few more seconds before laughing and hugging her back.

"I remembered!" I exclaimed, laughing.

"I'm so proud of you!" She replied, pulling back. We sat there happily talking about what this means before she started pushing me towards the parking lot once more.

"So Rose," we both grinned at the name, "I'm sure John will be happy." I nodded grinning.

"I just wish I could remember my full name though," I told her grimacing.

"Let's just take it one day at a time," she told me chuckling. We pulled up to a rusted, brown truck and she opened the door for me, helping me out of the wheelchair and into the passenger seat. After she closed the door, she folded my wheelchair up and put it in the bed of the truck.

Once she was inside the truck she turned the key in the ignition and it stuttered for a few minutes before finally turning on. I gave her a pointed look and she returned it shyly.

"Please excuse the truck; we are planning on getting a new one soon." I smirked and nodded at her and she pulled out of the parking lot and drove away from the hospital.

"So Rose, I'm sure some of John's men will be at the house when we get there. I'll introduce you to them," she told me fifteen minutes later as she turned onto a dirt road. My stomach churned slightly with nerves, the thought of finally going to John and Doreene's house and meeting a bunch of strangers, scaring me. Doreene must have felt my tension because she squeezed my hand and gave me a comforting look.

"Don't worry, the boys will love you, they are some crazy young men," she laughed, in turn making me laughed and taking the edge off of my nerves.

She drove for about ten more minutes before pulling into the driveway of a small wooden house. It was small but it had a warm, homey feel to it. There was a small porch with a railing covered in potted plants and flowers. A screen door was in the middle of the house giving a small view of what laid inside.

"Do you like it?" She asked, neither one of us getting up. I nodded at her and smiled happily.

"It's beautiful," I told her, starting to open my door. She got out and hurried to my side, getting my wheelchair before helping me out and setting me in it.

"John, can you come out here?" She yelled, starting to push me towards the steps. John came outside a few seconds later, smiling at us.

"With his help, they turned the wheelchair around and pulled me up the front steps.

"So Hun-"

"Rose," Doreene corrected, smiling at me. John looked between both of us before he realized what she just said.

"You remembered?" He asked grinning. I nodded happily and he clapped his hands. "That's great!"

"I only remembered that, but it has to count for something right?" I asked him. He smiled and wrapped his arm around Doreene's waist, nodding his head.

"Of course," he replied.

He kissed Doreene on the cheek before leading us towards, what I assumed to be, the kitchen. Once I entered the room, three men caught my attention. They were sitting around a table, facing the doorway that we just came through.

The one on the left had blonde hair and brown eyes that had a puppy dog look to them. He had a lean build with large muscles on his arms. I could see through his fitted white t-shirt and his skin was a dark tan with a hint of red on his cheeks.

The one in the middle had his arms crossed across his chest and was leaning back dangerously in his chair. He had bronze colored hair and washed out green eyes. Just like the first guy, his skin was tan and he had a red burn on his cheeks. He had a slightly bigger build then the other and was wearing a blue, plaid shirt that was cut at the sleeves. A smirk lay on his lips as I looked at him.

The last guy was leaning back against his chair his arms by his side and his hands in his lap. He looked smaller than the other two and had shaggy brown hair and baby blue eye. He was giving me a shy smile, freckles splayed across his lifted cheeks.

It was like I just entered hot guy heaven. They were all cute, country, and had muscles and great smiles. They all had boots on their feet and had rips in there jeans from working. Their hair as slightly matted to their foreheads from this morning's work.

"Rose," he paused, getting used to the name, just as Doreene did, "this is Jeremiah, Lucas, and Blane," John said, pointing to each of the guys. Jeremiah was the cute, baby-faced one, Lucas was the shy one, and Blane was the bad-boy.

"Nice to meet you," I whispered, cursing myself for being so shy. Each of them smiled at me before replying back.

"Pleasure," Jeremiah, said smiling.

"It's very…_nice_ to meet you," Blane said, winking. I looked towards Lucas but he only nodded shyly and smiled. Each of them looked to be around 23 years old maybe, and I was putting myself at 28 at the moment seeing as I couldn't remember how old I was.

I didn't notice it when we were introducing each other, but I saw now that their eyes kept flickering towards my cheek and arms where scars from the attack resided.

I looked down, hiding my cheek and crossing my arms to cover the scars.

"Come on boys, lunch is over, time to get to work," John said, his voice hard. I heard scuffling and then the door shut indicating that they were gone.

"Sorry about that Rose," Doreene told me softly as she picked up the boys plates and put them in the sink.

"I was expecting it," I replied, playing with my nails. I heard her sigh and it was silent for a few seconds before she walked back over to me and started pushing me towards the hallway.

"How about I show you your room now?" She asked, changing the subject.

"That would be nice," I replied quickly. We stopped in front of a white, wooden door and she opened it softly. I rolled myself inside and looked around.

It was very plain and simple. A desk was on the left wall with a lamp on top of it. To the left of it was another door that I believed to be a closet. In front of me was a window with a window seat underneath it. A bed was sticking out from the right wall with a small table besides it.

"I figured we could go shopping tomorrow for bed sheets and other things you would like in your room." She told me from behind. I turned towards here, my eyes watering slightly.

"Thank you," I whispered."

"Rose you are a wonderful girl, and I know after everything you have been through, that you deserve this. You might be here for a very short time, or a very long time, but I assure you that the time you are here you will be comfortable and have something to call yours." She told me, kneeling in front of me with her hands holding my forearms.

"You don't know how much this means to me Doreene. You and John have done so much for me, and all I show you is tears and frustration and get mad about what is happening to me and what has already happened." I told her, now crying.

"I know that it's going to take time for you to figure out who you are and what is happening to you. I will be here if you ever have to talk. You had something very tragic happen to you, and your mind is locking it up so you forget. It's going to be hard but neither John nor I will leave you here to deal with it by yourself." She told me, hugging me to her. I sobbed into her arms and hugged her tightly.

"Okay, enough with the crying. I want you to write a list of things that you want in you room so we know what to get tomorrow, don't just get the basic things, get a couple of extra things that make you happy Rose, you have this whole room to decorate it however you like." I smiled and nodded. After she pointed me towards the desk where pen and paper are, she left to make some lemonade for the boys.

I continued to sit there and think over everything. I could believe how lucky I have been since meeting John and Doreene; they are the nicest people in the world for doing this for me. I was still broken, lost, but they are giving me a home, friends, and another life.

I have to get used to the stares, accept who I am now, and what I have been through. I want to forget my fear but that would never go away, I would always fear that my attacker would find me again someday.

What if my fear of what happened to me is keeping my memories hidden? Locking them away because something inside of me wants to forget it.

Do I really want to remember that?

What happened to the rest of my life then? Am I keeping all of it hidden too? Did something bad happen in the rest of my life that I don't want to remember?

Whatever is keeping them back, though, I don't know if I really want to find out what they are.

**:( It was brought up in one of my other chapters a few back(maybe last chapter) how they believe Rose needs to feel safe to remember. Well this was like a reminder. Rose is scared of her attacker and the memories so she won't remember what happened, and its keeping the rest of her other memoriestoo! :( Poor Rose...Be warned, I won't have Rose remember right off the back..or maybe not at all...;) Please review! **


	21. Chapter 21

**Thank you everyone for the reviews!I was waiting for that one review to make it 260 but i really wanted to post another chapter.(: This is kind of a filler but there is also a memory hidden inside(; please review and ENJOY!(:**

**RPOV **

My first night at Doreene and John's house wasn't as peaceful as I wanted it. I woke up at 2 in the morning gasping in fright and sweating from the adrenaline running through my body. The nightmare was horrible, mostly because a part of me didn't know what was going on while the other part of me knew what was happening.

In the dream, a man was on top of me. We were in the middle of bushes and he was trying to get the buttons of my shirt undone. I was screaming and thrashing around, trying to get out of the person's grasp. I couldn't see the man either; he was like a shadow hidden by my own mind.

When I woke up, I had trouble figuring out if my nightmares were being created by my own mind, or from memories hidden inside my brain.

It was terrifying, however, because I couldn't move out of the person's hands and I felt like I was suffocating from terror and sobs that wanted to erupt from my body.

I couldn't go back to sleep after that, so I just sat on my bed and let my thoughts run wild. Around six in the morning, having lost track of time, I rolled myself into the bathroom to use the toilet, careful not to wake the other occupants of the house.

Once I was finished, I turned the water on, washed my hands and as I reached for the towel, I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror.

No matter how many times I have looked at my face, I couldn't get used to seeing the ragged scars that lined my skin. I felt…deformed somehow, like I missing a limb or an eye. My wet finger traced the one long scar that ran from my forehead to my chin, a clear cut. I then traced all of the other little scars that marked my skin, such as a small one above my right eye and a thin cut above my lip. Those were the three major ones but there were also some other cuts and scars around my face that were fading slightly.

My finger moved down my neck, tracing a scar that ran straight down it. How close did my attacker come to killing me? All he had to do was slit my neck and I would be dead.

I lifted my shirt and stared at the markings on my chest. They were disorganized and unordered and were scattered across my whole stomach. None of them hurt, thankfully, but they were all a reminder of how much this person must have hurt me.

I was almost dead, but why would I be in a field? Did he drop me off randomly, thinking I would die anyway with my injuries? Was he through torturing me and raping me, thinking that he has had enough?

And shouldn't I be traumatized right now? I was severely beaten and raped, but I have had no feelings of distress and I haven't sobbed and screamed or even sat there in terror. My memories were lost, and so were my true feelings.

One thing was an advantage though, I felt like I was starting over, or just beginning my life. I didn't remember my life from before, so why not create a new one here? I would remember…hopefully, but as of right now, I was going to live a new life and wait.

"Rose? Are you in there, sweetheart?" I jerked my shirt down and brushed my hair out of my face, trying to put a smile on my face as I opened the door awkwardly, trying not to hit my leg or wheelchair.

"Sorry John," I told him as his face came into view. He gave me a tired smile, obviously just waking up, and patted my shoulder.

"It's alright; I'm not used to someone being up before me." He replied chuckling. I joined in but as we trailed off I realized that he needed to get inside the bathroom.

"Are you already starting work?" I asked him softly, moving out of his way. He sighed and nodded, showing how tired he was but he did release another smile.

"Yes ma'am, as the saying goes...the early bird catches the worm." He laughed again before patting my shoulder and moving into the bathroom. I rolled back to my room and towards my window-seat, grabbing a pillow and blanket on the way.

I rested my head on the pillow and looking out into the rising sun. There was a small fog brushing the ground and I saw a windmill out in the distance turning softly. I stared through the acres of fields, wondering how much they owned, and watched as the sun bit down on the slightly raised corn. As I tilted my head to the right, I saw a cow lying down on the ground and guessed that this was their cow Koko.

As I was looking at the scenery, I heard the screen door open and close before seeing John walking through the yard and towards a small barn to the left. A green tractor rested beside it with a few other vehicles that I couldn't put names to.

I must have closed my eyes, because when I opened them again, the sun was glaring down at me from a high point in the sky. I groaned and moved my stiff leg, feeling a slight pain, and slid myself back into my abandoned wheelchair.

I placed my hands on the wheels and pushed myself out of my room and towards the kitchen. Doreene was sitting at the kitchen table, a coffee mug resting in one hand and a small book sitting in the other.

"Rose," Doreene said, catching my rolling form. I smiled at her and set myself besides her.

"Hi Doreene," I replied, resting my head in my hand as I leaned my elbow on the table.

"How did you sleep Honey?" I smiled at the endearment and shrugged my shoulders.

"I've had better; I'm still having that nightmare." I told her, making her grimace. It was true; I have been having the dream or nightmare since I fell asleep the first night in the hospital.

"Did you see the man?"

"No," I replied disgruntled.

"Don't worry Rose; I'm sure whoever he is will show up at some point." She replied, patting my hand. She believed that I was reliving a memory, but I was stuck in between that and making it up on my own.

"I'm not really worried about it now," I told her, shrugging again.

She didn't reply and we sat in silence for a little bit until she set her book down and looking at me.

"How about I make you something to eat while you get ready and then after you eat we can get going so we can shop." She told me, shifting her chair backwards.

"Sounds good," I said smiling, she nodded and headed to the refrigerator while I moved myself back to my room and grabbed some of the clothes that Doreene had bought me while I was at the hospital.

I changed into a pair of basketball shorts and a long sleeved t-shirt, being that I wasn't comfortable showing my arms around anybody yet, and threw my hair up in a bun. As I looked down at my damaged leg, I caught sight of the scars on the other one. There weren't as many scars as there were on my arms and stomach, but they were still there. The worst scarring seemed to be around my ankles and wrist though, like I was struggling with something.

"Here Rose," I jumped as I heard Doreene's voice from the doorway. She walked into the room with a glass of water and two white pills. "The doctor said to take one every morning and before you go to bed. I seemed to forget last night, sorry."

"Its fine Doreene," I reassured, taking the water and pills and swallowing them as needed. She took the empty glass from me and gave me a small smile before walking out of the room once more. I looked once more at the brace on my leg, I was already out of my cast, but I still had to have something on my leg to help it, before wheeling myself towards the door.

"So where are we going first?" I asked her as we got settled into the truck again.

"There are a few shops in town that sell clothes and necessities. They also sell some knick-knacks if you want to decorate your room too." She informed me, waving to John, Jeremiah, Lucas, and Blane as we passed them.

"You don't need to spend all of the money on me Doreene, a few clothes and a toothbrush will be fine by me." She snorted, looking at me before shaking her head.

"Don't worry about it Rose, we want you to feel comfortable here until your memories return," she said smiling. I gave her a weary look but she ignored it entirely.

The whole shopping day ended up being fun. This was a small town, so Doreene knew almost everybody we passed. The store-owners greeted her happily and used her name and, surprisingly, they all shook my hand and gave me big smiles. There were no looks of sympathy and a lot of them were very nice and helpful.

I ended getting all the small things, such as a toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush, and hair ties. After, she helped me find clothes that would be comfortable like shirts, tank-tops, shorts, jeans, socks, and she bought me some shoes too.

One shop sold a pretty black comforter with red roses on it. I got the matching set and also found a lamp that was black and red with hanging plastic jewels. She bought me some red and black curtains and soon enough we already knew what the design would be for my room.

She bought me some picture frames, telling me that there would be pictures to fill them soon, and she bought a mirror to hand above the dresser.

We walked into one store that had a lot of small things. Doreene walked off to look at something, while I moved myself around the shop, looking at things. I moved towards a small electronic section and I couldn't stop myself from sliding a finger over a beautiful camera that looked expensive. Right as I touched it, however, an image came into my mind.

I saw a beautiful woman with dirty blonde hair and blue eyes. Her face was narrow and she had a slight dimple on her left cheek. She was staring at…me? Her eyes were gentle and amused and she was holding out a camera.

"I got you a something Rosie. It's a camera, you can use it to take pictures of things and put them in your room." She said her voice sweet, caring and gentle.

"Really! This is so cool! Can I use it now? Can I take a picture of you?" A little girl's voice rang through the air, and it came out of my mouth. _Was this a memory? _

"Of course Rosie, but why me?" She asked, kneeling down in front of me.

"Because you are really pretty Aunt Alberta," the little girl…or I said.

The women, Aunt Alberta, smiled at me and gave me the camera. Once I flashed the camera with my small hands my vision darkened and I blinked my eyes quickly.

"Rose? Are you alright honey?" I looked up at Doreene and she was standing in front of me with a worried expression.

"Y-yes?" I told her, though it came out more like a question. She raised her eyebrows and gave me a look. "I think I just remembered something," I told her, my eyes looking back at the camera.

"What did you remember?" She asked, kneeling beside me.

"I remembered a woman, she was beautiful, and I think she was talking to me, when I was younger. She was giving me a camera and I was so excited." I whispered amazed, rubbing my hand across the glossy electronic.

"Do you think cameras were a big thing in your life?" Doreene asked, touching the same camera.

"I don't know, but I have a strong urge to pick this camera up and take a picture." I told her chuckling breathlessly. She picked it up and put it into my hands, making me stare at it amazed.

"How about I get it for you as a gift," she told me smiling. My eyes widened at her and I shook my head fiercely.

"Everything that you have already gotten me is a gift! You don't need to buy this for me! Once I get my legs stronger and I can walk more then maybe I can get a job to pay for it myself but you don't need to do that." She was already walking towards the cashier while I tried hard to catch up with her.

"Can I buy this please?" She asked, handing it the person behind the counter. The man smiled, nodded and went into the back.

"Doreene you really don't have to do this," I told her, but she looked down at me and nodded her head.

"It's a gift Rose, and if it bugs you so much why don't you help me in the kitchen for the next week to make it up. Those boys eat a lot and it's hard for me to do it myself." I looked at her, unsure of her offer, but when she raised an eyebrow; I caved and nodded my head.

"Okay," I said softly, watching as the man came back out with a box in his hand with the picture of the camera on it.

"A memory card is already in the camera, and it only needs to charge and it will be good to go." He said, smiling at Doreene. She returned it and handed him a credit card. He swiped it and handed her the box. "Thank you for your service Doreene."

"Thank you for your help Hector," she replied, walking behind me to push me out of the store. I held the camera box in my hands, staring at it, grateful that I had Doreene in my life.

We stopped at a grocery store and she bought some supplies for the kitchen before paying and getting us back in the car. We started on our way back to her house soon enough.

"I think we got a lot accomplished today, don't you think?" She asked, taping her fingers along to the tune on the radio.

"Thank you again Doreene, you really didn't have to do this for me today." She waved me off and laughed.

"I wouldn't have done this for anybody else," she told me, squeezing my hand. I sighed and smiled back at her.

We were soon driving up the driveway and once we stopped, John and the boys were out helping with the bags, though I told them that I could take some, I wasn't helpless. They let me carry one, small bag. That was _it. _I glared at them, but they just laughed and walked inside.

It was the first time that I sat around the table with everybody. That night, the boys stayed for dinner and, like promised, I helped Doreene making dinner from where I was seated in my chair. I learned a lot about the boys, learning that shy Lucas was actually engaged to one of the cowgirls in town. Blane was actually different than what appearances for told me he was. He was actually really funny and joked around a lot with Lucas and Jeremiah. Jeremiah also had a sense of humor but he would be the one that made small talk with me and told me _secrets _about Lucas and Blane that I didn't know. He also told me if the others were lying or not…it was a very entertaining night.

During the dinner, Doreene and John would either talk quietly to themselves or look at the boys with amusement. Doreene would chastise them and John would slyly high-five them when they were being witty.

Once dinner was over, I was sitting in the living room with the 3 boys while Doreene and John sat in the kitchen and cleaned up.

"So Rose," Blane said, after he stopped making fun of Jeremiah, "do you remember anything that happened to you yet?" I stopped laughing and my smile dropped. Jeremiah shoved Blane and gave him a look.

"No, I don't," I replied, looking down.

"Sorry," he muttered softly, obviously looking for a way out of the conversation.

"Don't be, I don't want anybody to think this is a forbidden topic. My feeling won't be hurt because I really don't know of anything to feel." I told them, shrugging.

"So you just woke up in the hospital and were covered in scars?" Blane asked more sure of his question now.

"Yes, but this one," I pointed to the long one on the side of my face; "they said was already there."

"If I ever see that dude I will point my rifle right at his leg and shoot him so that he can't walk, and then torture him slowly." Lucas said, shocking me. He was the shyer one but he had a very determined look on his face and in his eyes.

Jeremiah and Blane agreed with him and I felt my eyes water. One night can change a lot of things. I was already close with these boys and they already seemed protective of me. It was really sweet and it made me happy to see that I had more friends to hang on to.

They left an hour later, each of them giving me a soft hug so they wouldn't hurt me, and then bidding Doreene and John a goodbye and 'see you in the morning boss!"

I took my pills again and then I was telling Doreene and John goodnight myself. I changed into some sleep wear that I had bought, and brushed my hair out. I brushed my teeth and then picked myself up and slipped under the covers carefully.

Once I was done, and the house was quiet, I stared at the ceiling and sighed in content, closing my eyes to dream of my friends, John, Doreene, and the mysterious Aunt Alberta from my memory.

**THANKS for reading(: Please review if you wanna;D**


	22. Chapter 22

**Helloooo everyone(: Thanks for all the reviews last chapter! I almost to 300! Im so excited(:D) this is the most reviews i've gotten on a story before and im glad all of you like it! This isn't that long but it has three point of views in it. None of them are Rose, but there is Dimitri, a surprise one, and an unknown one(; ENJOY!**

**DPOV**

It has been three weeks since my plane landed in Baia and I was once again with my family. Mama was outside before I had a chance to open my cab door and was tightly pulling me into an embrace. I stood with her outside of the house, the cab driver growing angry by my lack of unloading. Once I was in my mother's arms, however, I lost my blank façade and cried silently into her shoulder. I was still very taller than her but she reached up to wrap her arms around my neck and I slouched down into her neck defeated.

I had cleared my throat, grabbed the small carry-on bag that I took with me to the states, and paid the cab driver with an extra tip. When he saw my red eyes and blank face, he took the money and quickly left.

Viktoria was waiting for me on the steps, sadness and confusion layering her face. When she saw me, she wrapped her arms around my waist in a hug and I softly wrapped my arms around her, seeking the comfort of my little sister.

I later realized that her confusion stemmed from my sadness. She didn't know what had happened back in America, and neither did any of my other sisters. They have never seen me this sad, besides the time when Ivan died, and they knew that something bad must have happened to make me this way. I would have to take a lot to break their tough and strong brother.

Once I explained my story of what had happened, another round of hugging came and tears fell slowly from my eyes. Sonya, due to hormones, cried right along with me, all of my sisters did but she cried harder because of her 7 month pregnancy. Karolina held onto baby Zoya as she cried and my nephew Paul was asleep in his room upstairs. Karolina had two children, them being Paul and Zoya.

Yeva came downstairs after I was done telling my story. I didn't have a reason for her reaction towards me, and still didn't as of today. Yeva walked straight towards me, glaring at me, and stuck her finger right in my face.

"You gave up, I expected you not to stop until this was back together again. I am ashamed to call you my grandson," she snapped, taking her finger back and pointing it towards my heart when she talked about putting it back together again and stalking out of the room. I stared at her in shock, as did everyone else in the room, until Mama got up and walked out of the room.

I didn't know what she meant. I gave up? She thought I wouldn't stop until my heart was back together again? That couldn't happen because without Roza, it would always be broken. Is she saying I gave up on Roza, because I would search day and night for her if I knew that she was still out there.

_You don't know if she is dead either, they never found her. All they found was blood, not a body. _I couldn't believe that though, how could she go through the torture that she supposedly went through and survive? Even the police had no other clues and without them I didn't know what else was left to find.

She was gone. I just had trouble accepting it.

After a week of staying with the family, receiving looks of sympathy and sadness, I decided to go back to my apartment in town located above my studio where I fought and had classes. The one my father used to own.

I didn't open the studio for a week. I trained daily, taking some of my pain and frustration out on the dummies. I used the punching bag constantly and ran every morning. Once I found my emotions in check, keeping them hidden until I could open them up again, I reopened the studio.

For the past week, I only signed up people to take classes and worked a little with ones that had already been signed up from before I left.

It was Sunday night, I was sitting on my bed, having just taken a shower, and I was staring at the picture that I had taken of Rose. I might have cried and released my pain somewhat, but tonight I was hit hard.

_I wouldn't be here if she was still alive. _Right now we would either be over at Lissa and Christian's house for dinner, or we would be at her house and I would be cooking. I would set the table, place the food in the center, and light a candle.

After I was through, I would walk into her room, sneak up behind her as she was standing in front of her bed, album open and resting in front of her, and wrap my arms around her waist. I would lightly kiss the exposed skin on her neck, moving more and more of her beautiful, brown hair away from her face as I trailed kisses up towards her chin, and then I would kiss the corner of her luscious lips before solidly placing my lips upon hers.

After enjoying the taste of her, always wanting more, I would pull back and whisper in her ear that dinner was ready as I nibbled on her earlobe. She would giggle and turn around, kissing me passionately before spinning away from me and towards the awaiting food.

I opened my eyes, never realizing that I had closed them. Once I remembered that it was all just a dream in my head, a wish that would never be granted, I broke down in sobs.

I gripped the photo of her tightly in my right hand and cried into my left one. I continued to rock myself back and forth in agony, wanting my heartbreak to end. This girl…this _woman _has captured my attention and given me a reason to smile everyday that I was with her. I wanted to comfort her when she was down and hug her when she was doubting, and I wanted to laugh along beside her when she was happy.

I _wanted_ all of this, past tense. I couldn't do any of those things with her now.

I spent the whole night sobbing and clutching the picture, not once thinking about what I would look like in the morning, just sobbing my entire heart out. I cried for lost love. I cried out of anger for the person who took my whole entire world from me. I cried for my Roza.

Would I ever get better? Maybe.

Would I ever forget? Never.

Would I ever go back and change time? Never.

Would I get through this? I don't know.

Wishes come true sometimes and if I could wish for one more night with Rose I would take it in a heartbeat. I love Rosemarie Hathaway and I hope wherever she is, that she is happy and taken care of.

Because I couldn't protect her myself, so if she is in heaven, than I hope that she will look down and help me through this and maybe one day I can join her.

**ABEPOV**

I stared down at my wife, her red hair splayed unevenly over her pillow as she slept. She turned over once more, never being able to sleep peacefully from the nightmares that attack her every night.

I wish I could accept the words that she had told me, wish that I could actually sleep and my thoughts wouldn't keep me up all night, but I couldn't.

It was my entire fault.

I felt like the worst father in the world. I could hear the tortured screams of my daughter over and over again in my ear as if she was still three doors away from me in the building. I would yell and thrash until a guard would come in to shut me up. Even then I wouldn't.

My dear Rosemarie, she was the most precious girl in the entire world. I couldn't believe someone as vile as Nathan would torture her, and…kill her. I want to strangle him until he is begging for mercy, and then I want to get a knife and slice him for every single time he sliced her.

I clearly remember all the times when Nathan came into my room after he was in Rose's. He would be grinning like a mad man while cleaning the blood off of his knife. I wish I could have been released from my ropes and chains so I could the asshole in front of me.

Now I couldn't even do that. I was stuck wondering what if, when there was nothing left. I was only three doors away, and I couldn't save her.

I was weak. My job might have proved me wrong before I was taken by those three large men, but whatever was left of that hard, strong person that nobody wanted to mess with, is gone.

I was going to quit my Buisness, because it was the reason that I never got to know my daughter and love her like any other father could. I was never there on her first days of school or her plays that she was in.

I abandoned her, and she still gave herself up for me.

Nathan told me his plan of getting Janine to give herself up to save me, but when he called Rose, she was to selfless to let her Mom go, she put herself in her mom's way to save me and her.

How could she protect a father that abandoned her in her early childhood? Only coming home some nights and leaving the next?

I hated myself, and I know that somewhere inside, Janine hated me too. She didn't show it, but I know she was thinking it.

My tough exterior has been broken down for good. I still stayed up every night, wondering how they took Rose away from me without me knowing? They said that her blood stained a trail through grass just outside a fenced in area, before it stopped.

I know Nathan had found her, he probably got mad and killed her off, burying her deeply inside the earth, never to be found again.

"Abe," Janine whispered beside me, her eyes staring up at me. I looked down at her, brushing a piece of her red hair away from her face, before cupping her cheek in my hand. Seconds later I felt something wet fall down on top of it.

I was crying, if my workers or my assiociates would have seen me like this they would have had a heart attack. The tough, old scary mobster guy finally cracked.

"Ibrahaim," my wife whispered, sitting up and placing her small arms around me.

"I could have been here, if I would have been here more than Nathan wouldn't have found me and taken me, then I would still have Rose her and safe." I whispered, my voice cracking harshly. I felt her shake, and I knew she was sobbing as I was.

"Don't blame yourself, you can't," she whispered once she could talk. I shook my head, staring at a recent picture that stood on our bedside table of Rose when she was in high school.

"Then whose is it?" I asked her stonily. She pulled back and cupped my face with her small hands.

"Nathan's. He is the only person we can blame, no one else." This is why I fell in love with her, she tried so hard to make me know I was wrong and make me happy, but in this circumstance, it wasn't working.

"I was right there Jane, so close I was only ten steps away. I could have saved her."

"How? You were tied up, beaten, and could barely walk. How could you have saved her?" She told me, shaking me.

My only response was to bury my head into her hair and sob. She understood and wrapped her arms around my chest, letting us both wallow in the pain of losing our only daughter. Wherever she was, I hope she knew that I loved her dearly and that I was sorry.

**Unknown POV**

**Beep. Beep. Beep.**

I jumped, startled by the noise coming from the computer in front of me. I opened up the flashing button and stared at the information behind it.

_V,_

_There has been a match to the girl. Blood tests have been sent to a hospital in Texas and have popped up to find information behind it. She is alive, but she as amnesia and doesn't know who she is. I tried searching but until those results are sent back, we don't know where her current location is. I will get back to you when I get further information, but at this time Rosemarie is alive and somewhere in the world._

_H_

My eyes widened surprised. So she did live, this is a surprise. I thought she would have died with the amount of cuts and bruises and blood loss.

So she wants to make this a game…well Rosemarie don't worry. I will find you before you find yourself. It will be easy and quick, just like your death.

But, where in the world are you, Rosemarie Hathaway?

**Soo I put Abe in there, yes he is the surprise. I was thinking about putting Abe in there and I was hoping I got it right! Please review and I wonder who the unknown character is...next chapter is Rose and it will be four weeks later(: Thanks and review!**


	23. Chapter 23

**Helloooo everyone!:) Hows it going? Good? Bad? Fine? anyways this next cahpter is only Rose but it shows her adjusting to life on the farm:) At the end there is a surprise character that shows up in Rose's memory;) ENJOY!**

**Four Weeks Later**

**RPOV**

"Hey John, do you want these eggs loaded in the truck?" Jeremiah yelled waving at John who was standing and talking to Blane and Lucas by the barn.

"Yes! If we don't sell those now they won't be any good next week," he yelled back, taking his eyes off of Blane and Lucas for a second. Once he was done he turned back to them and waved a finger at the two boys.

"I knew I shouldn't have let them out of my sight last night," Jeremiah said shaking his head. I laughed and leaned against the side of his black truck near the tire, watching him load the crates onto the bed.

"I can't believe they tried to ride Koko," I replied, turning my head to look at the boys downcast expressions.

"Sometimes I think I'm the only sane one working here besides John," he huffed; humor and lack-of-oxygen keeping him from letting him speak normally as he lifted a heavier box.

"Are you sure you don't need help?" I asked him, wanting to actually work instead of standing there all the time.

"Rose…" He sighed looking over at me.

"Jerry…" I retorted using the nickname I had given to him. He rolled his eyes and stepped back waving at the boxes on the ground. I smiled smugly and walked over to him before leaning down and putting my fingers underneath the bottom of the crate and pulling up.

It didn't move.

"Oomph," I grunted, as I struggled to lift it. I heard Jeremiah laugh before swatting my hands away and easily lifting the box onto the truck. "I made it lighter," I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Sure you did Rosie," I pouted and turned around to walk back to lean against my spot on the truck. I heard him chuckle under his breath but I continued walking.

I played with the braid lying over my shoulder that I weaved this morning before coming outside. I had a cute, red, plaid, button-up shirt lying over my shoulders unbuttoned with a white tank underneath. I had on washed out blue-jeans that had rips on my knees with black cowgirl boots on my feet covering the bottom of my legs over my jeans.

I got my cast off two weeks ago and stopped using the wheelchair as the same time. I went to physical therapy for a week before I was able to walk without stumbling and I even gained some more strength back too.

My leg hurts sometimes and at night it becomes sore from not walking on them in a long time, but the Doctor gave me some pills to take before I go to bed to relieve some of the pain.

Since I've been here, I have also found my forte- photography. I absolutely love take pictures of people and the landscape out her in the country. At sunset, the sky erupts into many shades of pink, orange, yellow, and purple, and it's amazing. I have over 100 pictures of it.

During the day, I take my camera and snap picture of some of the guys working. I would sneak up behind them and just take bunches of pictures of them. They are good subjects.

I have also taken pictures of the house and of Doreene in the kitchen cooking. She even stopped to smile at the camera when she sees me and flashes funny faces. She reminded me of the women in my dreams. I still had those dreams of course, of the same women, but now it somewhere different every time.

Sometimes she makes the funny faces like Doreene or she points at different things that I should take pictures of. One dream, however, was different from all of them. I was in a play at a school surrounded by other little kids when someone rushed over to me, grabbed my arm and started pulling me off stage.

I didn't know who she was, I couldn't speak, I only followed the women to the car and the last part I remembered before I woke up was pulling up at a hospital.

"Rosie, you ready?" Jeremiah asked, waving a hand in front of my face. I slapped it away and glared at him. He saw this and said, "What? You weren't responding!"

"Sorry," I mumbled, brushing a piece of my hair behind my ear. I nodded and walked towards the passenger side door, getting inside and waiting for him to get in the driver's side. Jeremiah and I were going to sell the stock in town at the market. He was going to go by himself until I decided to go with him.

I have grown closer to all the three of the boys; I have grown to love them as funny, pain-in-the-butt, little brothers. Living with Doreene and John has gotten me closer to them also. I help Doreene more with dinner-seeing as I can walk around and help her-and with cleaning the house. At first she was a little hesitant about me helping but I told her that I wanted to hold up my end of the bargain since they were letting me live there for free.

John-and the boys- have taught me the farming life. John showed me the crop rotation schedule that I couldn't stop looking at, Lucas has taught me how to gather the eggs in the chicken cages, Jeremiah taught me how to rope the cattle and the horses and bring them in to feed, and Blane has taught me all the best places to hide when you don't want to do work, or if you're in trouble with John.

Yes, Blane was definitely the trouble-maker.

I learned a lot about living on a farm, but at night, after the day is done and the sun is hiding, I wondered if this is really me? I enjoy the life that I am creating…but it doesn't feel right.

"Hey Jerry? Can we stop at Denise's shop so I can get some more frames?" I ask grabbing the pack of gum in the cup-holder and slipping one into my mouth. The taste of spicy, cinnamon bit at my tongue as I chewed the piece.

"How many pictures do you have now? 100? 200?" He asked sarcastically, shoving me in the shoulder laughing. I glared at him and shrugged my shoulders emotionlessly.

"I don't have that many," I grumbled, looking out the side window.

"I'm kidding Rosie; of course we can go to Denise's store. I'll even buy it," he added grinning at me like he won a prize. I shook my head at him and kissed his cheek in thanks.

Soon, we got to the market and Jeremiah parked the truck beside another and grabbed the sign out of the back seat. I got out and sat down on the bed next to him while we watched people walk by and look at the large section of vegetables, fruits, nuts, grains, and any other edible objects.

"So Rose, you remember anything else yet?" Jeremiah asked softly, knowing this was a sore subject. I looked down and shook my head. I haven't remembered anything except the women from my dreams and a pair of emerald green eyes and warm, melted brown ones.

The brown eyes came to me in a dream one night. A man was sitting beside me on a bed; his entire body was encased in shadows except his eyes. They mesmerized me, and I could feel myself sinking deeper and deeper into his warm embrace until he touches my cheek and the dream disappears as I wake up.

"Don't worry," Jeremiah called, touching my shoulder and bringing me back into the present, you'll remember."

"And what if I don't?" I retorted, looking over at him quickly, "what if I never remember who I am? The results might come back in a couple months, but then all it would do in surround me with strangers that I don't know, and I won't just be hurting myself but them too." I whispered closing my eyes as my voice drifted off. We sat there in silence before he finally spoke.

"I know how much you fear that that will happen to you Rose, but don't you think that by remembering small things like that women means that you're almost to that door of memories locked up inside you?" He asked, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I sighed and rested my head on his shoulder; these are the time when Jeremiah looked acted older than he really was.

Are moment was ended when people started stopping to buy eggs. We spent a good part of the day selling the goods before vendors started packing up and driving off. Jeremiah took me to Denise's store and I waved at her and smiled before walking over to her photography section and picking a frame that I liked the best.

"So what lucky picture is going in this beautiful frame," he asked, holding up the beautiful, round, stoned frame. Small black and white stones decorated the edges with a beautiful red rose bloomed on the top left corner.

"It's going to be a gift for Doreene and John for letting me stay at their house for this long. I snapped a picture of John hugging Doreene from behind while her eyes were closed and a small smile graced her lips. I loved the picture and decided to give it to them." I told him smiling.

"Well they are going to love it, all of your pictures are amazing," I laughed embarrassed and swatted him playfully on the arm. "I'm serious! You must have been a famous photographer or something before- um because you are great!"

I knew what he was going to say…before I was raped and my memories were erased.

"Thanks Jerry," we exchanged smiles before drifting off into a comfortable silence. He drove us back to the ranch around 3 and I hugged him before walking inside and towards my room, throwing a tired smile over at Doreene on my way.

Once I got inside my room, I grabbed the picture that I kept in a pile in my desk and placed it inside the frame delicately. Smiling in satisfaction, I walked back towards the living room where I saw Doreene sitting and noticed John had come inside too.

"Hey Rose," Doreene smiled and snuggled deeper into John's chest on the couch. I smiled at both of them before walking forward with the picture held behind my back.

"What yah hiding there?" John asked trying to peek behind me. I sat down beside both of them on the couch before pulling the picture out from behind me.

"Oh, Rose!" Doreene exclaimed, clutching the picture in her hands. "This is so beautiful!"

"It's just a little thank you for letting me stay here so long. Both of you are such a cute couple and the nicest people I have ever met. This is what I see between you and I thought if you had a reminder each day of the love you share…it's just a happy picture that I thought you would like."

I think- no I knew- I was rambling, but when Doreene wrapped her arms around me I shut up and hugged her back laughing.

"Rose this is the best gift I have ever received," she whispered in my ear. I smiled and leaned back while she looked back at the picture. "I wish I knew you before I married John, you would have been my wedding photographer!"

I laughed but felt myself zone out when a scene started playing itself in my head.

_"Hey Rose?" I turn to see a beautiful, blonde girl with emerald eyes smiling softly. "Will you also take the pictures for the invitations? You know, for everyone else at the office, and some of our other friends for college." I walk over and kiss her cheek, hugging her._

_"Of course I will," I breathe. _

_"Thanks Rose, now I'm going to have the best pictures for my children to see." I smirk at a black-haired guy with shocking blue eyes over her shoulder, who paled at the mention of children. "I still don't see why you don't show any art dealers your pictures at home. You could make some money off of that, and you could also put them in shows for people to see." I shook my head quickly before my vision turned dark._

Another scene flew into my head before I could recover from the first one.

_"Will you be my maid of honor?" I stared at her in shock, before looking at her left hand and seeing a giant diamond nestling on her ring finger._

_"Liss," I whisper to shock to say anything else. "Yes! Of course I will! I can't believe it! You're getting married!" I screamed as we jumped up and down hugging._

What is going on? This girl's name is Liss, or is it short for something? Were we close or something because I was going to be her maid of honor for her wedding? I had a lot of questions and no answers.

I breathed out as I opened my eyes and looked at Doreene as she hovered over me.

"Rose, what happened?" She asked worried, touching my arms and face to see if she can find even one imperfection.

"I'm-I'm fine," I breathed, my eyebrows scrunching together in confusion.

"Were they memories?" John asked interested. I looked over at him and nodded slowly. "What were they about?"

"I saw a beautiful, blonde girl- her name was Liss, I think- and she was telling me that she was getting married and wanted me to be her maid of honor and wanted me to be her wedding photographer for the invitations. That's all I saw and I don't know who they are but they seem like they are close to me…UGH this doesn't give me the answers I need!" I shouted getting up and pacing back and forth.

"Rose, it's not all going to make sense with the flick of your fingers," John told me grimacing. I closed my eyes and clenched my fists together knowing he was right.

"I know, but it's so _frustrating_," I growled, pulling at my hair.

"How about you go get some rest Rose, maybe something will come to you in your dreams," Doreene said softly. I sighed before nodding and giving her and John a hug.

Liss has to be my best friend, I can feel it. I just don't know anything else besides that. It's very annoying and frustrating. This is the most I have ever remembered before but it was also a bunch of nonsense!

I groaned and rolled over in my bed, stuffing my face in the pillow. This is not helping either.

I stayed awake for a while, trying to pull more memories of this Liss from my brain, but to no use I still only remembered those two scenes. I turned around and stared at all of the framed pictures hung around my room, remembering each memory. Pictures of the boys, John, Doreene, and I even posed in some.

I drifted off as my stress and frustration tired me into oblivion.

**Lissa is here...or Liss as Rose remembers. Surprising how wedding's bring up happy and sad memories :/ I hope Rose remembers everyone soon!:) Review if you want:)**


	24. Chapter 24

**Yes I'm doing some time skips but I'm sure we all want to get to the good parts(: ENJOY!**

**R****POV**

**One Month Later**

"What if they say no? What if they think my pictures are disgusting and wished I never sent them in the first place? What if they tore them to shreds? What if they want to torment me by sending the letter but telling me no? What if-"

"JESUS CHRIST ROSE! SHUT UP!" Blane yelled, slapping his hand over my mouth to stop my rambling. I immediately stopped but my knee was bouncing up and down with nerves. I felt every nerve in my body acting like a live wire and I just wanted to stand up and pace back and forth continuously.

It has been three weeks since sending one of my best pictures and a couple others with descriptions and my name and address to an art exhibit in California. In my memory, I remembered Liss telling me that I should put my work in an art exhibit but I was hesitant, now it seemed like a pretty good idea.

So I founded an art exhibit in California that had openings and I sent them a couple photos. Any day now, a letter in the mail would come that would tell me if I got a spot of not. I paced outside by the mailbox, excited when I saw the mailman, and disappointed when there weren't any for me.

It has been a month since that memory too. I haven't had _any _more memories since then, none of Liss, none of that woman, none of the dark-haired guy, and none of those beautiful brown eyes. _None, zip, NOTHING. _

It was very frustrating…

So to take my mind away from that, I took more pictures, until Doreene had to take the camera away from me so I could eat.

Now, as Blane takes his hand away from my mouth, I think I have been getting on everyone's nerves from my constant photography and anxiousness. I looked down ashamed.

"Sorry," I mumbled, not really knowing what else I could say, "I guess I've been a bit annoying lately…"

Blane and Doreene heard me, though I was whispering, and Doreene grabbed my hand tightly while Blane threw a hand over my shoulders.

"You are not being annoying Rose, you are just anxious. I know you pictures have wowed the people in California and they are sending them everywhere so people all over the US could see them. You are probably becoming the famous photographer at this very moment!" Doreene exclaimed trying to cheer me up. I smiled slightly, and laughed when I saw everybody nodding along with her.

"Rosie, you are a phenomenal photographer and a more spectacular person. If they can't see the art you are displaying than they should be fired and burned at the stake for missing someone so talented from this creative world." Jeremiah said, giving me a big smile. I laughed at his choice of words, blushing slightly.

"Thank you Jerry, Doreene," I said, leaning back on the couch. Blane adjusted himself and let me rest my head on his shoulder in a brotherly manner.

"Thanks Blane Blane," I whispered, sighing softly. He laughed and patted my shoulder.

"I got your back Rosie," he replied, winking at me. I grinned, and brushed my hair back behind my ear. We stayed silent for a few second until we all heard car tires pulling over gravel. I knew it was the mailman, but didn't get up.

"I'll get it," Lucas said after no one stood up. He left out the door and I didn't wait long, he came back about 5 minutes later with a bundle of letters in his hand. He handed them to John who was sitting on the other side of Doreene. He nodded to Lucas before flipping through them, grimacing.

"Well Rose," he said slowly, looking at me sadly. I frowned and looked down, only to see John shove a bright, white envelope under my nose. My eyes widened and I stared at the rectangle paper until Blane grunted and pushed me a little.

"Well, open it!" He exclaimed laughing. I breathed out shakily and picked up the parchment before tearing open the envelope slowly. I took the papers out and unrolled them neatly before reading the words on the paper.

My hand shook as it hovered over my mouth. Tears started streaming down my face and I closed my eyes, feeling my body shaking.

"Oh Rose, I'm sorry," Doreene said delicately pulling her arms around me and pulling me to her. It was strangely quiet until my shaking started turning into noises.

"Wait, is she…_laughing?" _Jeremiah asked confused. Doreene pulled back and realized he was right, I was laughing, and crying tears of joy.

"I GOT IT!" I screamed, jumping up and dancing around the small living room. Everyone hooted and hollered, spinning me around and hugging me tightly. "I can't believe they picked me," I breathed, falling back onto the couch.

"I think this deserves a…I TOLD YOU SO!" The boys shouted together laughing. I joined them, feeling overjoyed and ecstatic at the fact that they like my photos.

"When is the art show?" Doreene asked happily. I grabbed the papers and scanned it over before finding what I needed.

"It's next Saturday at the Palms Recreational Center. It's by the water so maybe I can visit the beach while I'm there!" I said excited. "And it says I can have two guests come with me." I looked around the room expectedly, waiting for someone to offer to go.

"Sorry Hun, I have to take care of the farm, it's almost time to harvest the fields." John said giving me a sad smile before adding, "And no Blane, you are staying here with me. After that stunt you pulled last week…" He trailed off, glaring at him. Blane grimaced and sulked beside me, though I did pat his chest and kiss his cheek in apology.

"I can't either; Eliza wants to go over the invitation lists for the wedding," Lucas said, sending me an apologizing smile. I returned it, telling him no hard feelings.

I looked over at Jeremiah and he had a thoughtful look on his face. I stood up and walked over to the chair he was sitting in, kneeling in front of him puppy dog eyes. He looked down at me and groaned, not liking the pleading that I was giving him.

"Fine! I'll go," he decided making me squeal and hug him tightly.

"Thank Jerry! You're the best!" I told him laughing.

"I know," he replied simply, shrugging his shoulders. After shoving him in the shoulder once, I walked over to Doreene, one again sitting by her side.

"How about you Doreene…will you go with me?" I asked her biting my lip. Doreene was like my best friend, and she was the one that was there in the middle of the night when I needed to talk. If something happened, I don't know if I could handle it by myself. I mean Jeremiah would help me, but I might need a woman's help if I had another dream about _that night_.

"Of course I will Rose," she said letting me pull her into a hug quickly. "We are going to have to go shopping too Rose, you will need a nice dress at the show and some heels." I grinned and nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh can I go!" Blane asked quickly, making me imagine him as a puppy with his ears straight up.

"You just want to see me in a dress, or hope to see me in a short one with a lot of cleavage," I told him, sticking my tongue out. He thought about it before shrugging and nodding his head.

"Duh," was his only reply.

"Still no Blane," John butted in, making him grumble once more.

"We can go tomorrow," Doreene said next, turning my attention back to her. I nodded and bit my lip, trying to keep in my excitement at what just happened.

"Well I better be getting home to Eliza," Lucas said getting up. I looked outside and noticed the sky darkening quickly. I stood up and gave him a hug before he said goodbye and walked towards the door.

"Come on sleaze, I'm your only ride out of here and I'm leaving now," Jeremiah said, gripping the boy in front of me to stand up. Blane glared at the name Jeremiah gave him before telling me, John, and Doreene bye.

"Have a good weekend boys!" Doreene called as they walked through the doors. I gathered up all of the pieces of paper that came in the envelope, smiling at John and Doreene before heading towards my room.

It only took five minutes before I was reading each paper for details and information about the art show. I think I fell asleep when reading about the rules because I woke up at about two in the morning covered in papers and sweating like crazy.

I don't think I have ever had a dream that detailed or disturbing before. It was about the night of my escape, and I felt so broken and destroyed. I was lying on a hard bed, I was naked, and my limbs were tied to railing on the bed. The bed was soaking wet with my blood and I could barely make out the mutilated skin of my stomach and legs. It hurt to move, and it hurt to think because it led me to the events that came with my physical pain.

I saw a door shutting closed, letting in a small amount of light, before the room was cast back into darkness. I saw one thing, however, that shone from the little light that swept through.

A small window that was on the bottom of the wall, darkened by who knows what, was the source of the shine. I remember sliding my hand painfully through the ropes holding me to the bed, soaked by my blood, and then one by one each of the other limbs on my body. I fell onto the floor, using almost all of my strength to hold in my screams of agony, and then made my way towards the window.

The feelings that swept through me felt real, make the memory even scarily. Agony, from the pain of the cuts and bruises, disgust, from the things my body has went through, fear, thinking that he could come back at any time, and guilt, for feeling like I was forgetting something important, or someone important.

When the memory would go away, I walked towards my desk, opening my laptop and turning it on. Once it loaded, I clicked to open the internet and then again to go to a search engine. Sighing, I typed in the words 'how to heal from getting raped' before pressing enter.

There weren't many answers, all of which wouldn't work or I have already tried. I hit my table in frustration, and then rested my hand on the edge, squeezing the edge hard. Something wet hit them, confused; I reached up and touched my cheeks feeling the damp mess that was on it.

This wasn't the first crying episode I've had. Every time I thought about what happened to me, I wanted to tear everything up and punch all of the walls. I was raped…raped so bad that I lost my memory. No knowledge of who I am or what I do, or who my friends are. It was a lot for one person to take in.

I didn't realize someone was in my room before their hand touched my shoulder. I looked up sharply, trying to dry my eyes at the same time.

"I heard a loud noise come from your room, I was just making sure you were okay," Doreene said to me, but her eyes weren't looking at me despite what she just said, they were looking at the computer screen that still held the results of my search.

"I didn't mean to wake you," I said, my voice quiet. She took her eyes off of the screen and placed her hand on my cheek.

"Don't worry Rose, I'm glad you did," she replied giving me a short smile. It was then that I allowed her to take me back to my bed. She sat beside me both of us looking forward.

"There is no real answer is there?" I whispered, continuing to look forward. From my peripheral, I could see her look at me with a sad expression. "You know, they tell you that you heal over time, but over time I remember things that I don't want to remember and I break all over again. Sometimes…sometimes I wish that I died out in that field."

"Rose!" Doreene chastised, "Don't ever think like that."

"Why can't I? It would be easier than remembering." I muttered, pulling my knees up to my chest.

"You think that now, but wouldn't it be easier to forget over time, and make new memories now. You survived something no normal person ever could. You found strength that no power lifter could ever use. You fought a battle that no soldier could win like you did." She whispered fiercely, shocking me.

"How did I win?" I snapped, look g her straight in the eyes.

"You won because you are sitting right here, right now, talking to someone who cares for you deeply, living in a house owned by a couple who would heal you if they had the power to in a second, and you are laughing with friends that would hold you in your time of need. You gained things that he thought he was taking away from you, and yes there will be tears, and yes there will be scars, but Rose look at you. He didn't take away your beauty or your heart, he lost…not you."

I was crying hard by the end of her speech and wrapped my arms around her, letting go in her embrace. I knew she was right but there was one thing that he did take away that I would never get back.

"It's going to take time, and there will be hard memories you are going to encounter, but I will be here every day to help." She whispered into my hair, running her fingers through it in a soothing manner.

"Thank you Doreene…thank you," I said, my voice cracking with every syllable.

"Of course Rosie," I chuckled at the name everyone seemed to pick up and sighed. "Are you sure that you want to go to California?" I knew she wasn't saying this because I wasn't good, she was only saying this because of my emotional state.

"Yes, it helps me…somehow," I replied, yawning. She chuckled and patted my arm.

"Alright, go to sleep now Rose," I nodded and closed my eyes on her chest. It didn't take long before drifting off into a dark world.

**LPOV**

"I don't want it like that Christian, it's going to be teal and ivory, I don't want any fall colors," I snapped, flipping through the magazine. Christian sighed in anger before standing up and walking towards the door. "Where do you think you're going? We still have to pick flower arrangement!" I exclaimed, glaring at his back.

"We?" He said, stopping but not turning around. "When was the last time 'we' have done anything together?"

"What are you talking about?" I seethed, snapping the magazine shut and standing up.

"We are supposed to be in this together remember, you and me, and so far, it's only you and what you want. I have been trying to compromise on everything you have said but you haven't even tried doing it back. All of my ideas get shot down and quite frankly, I don't see the girl that I fell in love with anymore." He growled, waving his hands around crazily.

"I haven't-"

"Oh yes you have Vasilisa, you even ignore all of your friends or you treat them like shit! If this is who you are now then I don't think I want it anymore." He stated emotionlessly. I stared at the heartbreak in his eyes before he turned around once more.

"Christian, I'm sorry," I whispered, sliding down the couch and curling up beside it. My hands were pulling at my hair, while I felt tears threaten to come out.

I was acting exactly the way he described and I knew it. I think I was trying to be strong, and I didn't want to be weak anymore, but I started acting like a…bitch.

"I'm sorry Christian, please don't leave, please," I sobbed, biting my arm to keep the sobs in. I haven't cried for a month and I felt my wall crumbling to the ground. Christian leaving me made me realize that I needed him and if he left than I would have no one.

"I'm sorry Rose," I cried out, feeling like I let her down greatly. She would have never acted like I was now; she would have done the same thing as Christian if she was here.

Knowing I was alone, I continued to break down. This was worse than when they pronounced Rose dead, this was like finally realizing she wasn't coming back and nothing I could do would make it any easier.

I felt something…something warm touching my head, or my hair. I reached up, feeling the rough, warm texture of someone's hand running their fingers through my hair.

Turning around, I saw that Christian was sitting beside me, crying his own tears.

"I'm sorry Liss," he whispered, and I realized what he had just done. He tried leaving me on purpose, just to make me break down and realize what I've been doing. He planned this.

"No...No, no Chris I'm sorry. I was just tr-trying to hold on to the little sanity I had left and it was turning me into-into…"

"I know Liss, I know," He whispered, pulling me onto his lap.

"I didn't want to let anyone else in, I didn't want to feel the sense of loss that I did when Rose died, and I didn't want to hurt anymore…"

"Liss, baby, I know how hard it was losing someone special to you, and I know how much you want to lock everyone out so you would never feel hurt anymore. I know, but you changed that. You have to talk to me, you have to mourn it's the only way you can heal from the sort of loss, but keeping everyone out will only hurt you more." He whispered, cupping my cheeks in his hands.

"I won't, I can't, please don't leave," I pleaded, grabbing his shirt. He kissed my lips once before pulling me tightly into his arms.

"Never Liss, we will get through this…together."

"Together, not alone," I added, biting my lip.

"Exactly."

"Hey Liss, there is a…art show next week at the Palms Recreational Center. We can go to scope out some photographers for the wedding." Christian said, looking at the laptop in front of us. I looked up from some papers and towards the computer.

"That sounds fine Chris," I told him, kissing his cheek. I know he was trying to be gentle when dealing with the photography spot that needed to be filled and I was thankful to him for that.

We had been talking and discussing things for the wedding together, finally deciding on the colors purple and ivory. Purple was very royal and ivory was delicate and went with purple beautifully. We even picked out the flowers and invitations that would be sent out in a couple of weeks.

"I'm going to call to get some tickets, so I will be right back." HE told me, kissing my forehead before getting up and walking out of the room.

When he was gone, I picked up my cell phone and started to dial a number. I remembered what Chris said a couple of hours ago when he was pretending to call off the wedding, that I was ignoring all of my friends, and I decided that I needed to apologize to all of them.

"Hello," Mia's agitated voice rang through the phone.

"Mia," I asked in a small voice.

"What do you want Lissa," her voice was cold and filled with anger. I sighed, knowing this couldn't be handled over the phone.

"Will you and Eddie come over real quick," I asked hopefully, though it would take a lot more than asking for her to accept my invitation.

"Did Christian put you up to this?" She snapped, sighing deeply.

"No! No, I just…please, I just really need all of you to come over." I whispered into the phone. She didn't speak for a few minutes, and when I went to say something else, she answered.

"I'll be over in a few," she stated before hanging up. I sighed in relief before dialing another number I knew so well.

"Hello?" He answered happily; laughing as he said something to someone he was with.

"Hey Adrian," I said softly, hoping he wouldn't hang up on me.

"Oh it's you," I flinched, biting my lip so he wouldn't hear how much that hurt, but it was karma right, for all the harsh things that I said to him over the past two months.

"Adrian, will you and Sydney please come to my house?" I asked him, swallowing the lump in my throat.

"Why don't you just yell at Christian some more, I've had enough of it Lissa," he stated coldly. Closing my eyes, I sighed out. I haven't said anything but harsh words to them ever since Rose did and they were hurting too. Of course they wouldn't forgive me.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called," I said quickly before hanging up. Christian walked into the room, eyeing the phone in my hand before grabbing the other one.

"Who were you talking to?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"Adrian…and I called Mia before him. She and Eddie are coming over, but I don't think Adrian or Sydney will…" I trailed off, throwing my arms around him.

"I understand," he whispered.

"I know, but I can't believe the way I have treated all of you. You all were mourning too, and I just threw complaints and harsh words at you." I murmured, tears escaping my eyes.

"They will understand," he replied, smoothing my hair down. I nodded before pulling away and sitting down. He sat next to me and held my hand while I opened a new tab on the internet to look at more wedding details to keep my mind occupied.

Not twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang. I froze before looking at Christian in fear. He kissed my forehead before getting up and disappearing out of the room.

I heard them walk in but I didn't look up. Christian walked over and pulled me close, whispering encouraging words in my ear before I looked up at them.

Eddie was standing behind Mia with a blank face while she just glared at me from her place in Eddie's arms. I walked out of Christian's arms and towards them slowly.

"Thank you for coming on short notice," I told them, not knowing how to start.

"Forget pleasantries, what do you want?" Mia snapped, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I want to apologize, for everything I've done to you guys, for all of the harsh words I've said, and how I've been dealing with Rose's death. I realized that I was trying to…push all of you away so if something happened to you guys, then I wouldn't feel the hurt that I feel right now." I whispered, already feeling the tears leaking through my eyes.

Eddie shook his head and Mia continued to glare.

"We are hurting too; pushing us away like you did was like losing another friend. We know that you are hurting from Rose's death but we are here to help each other, you aren't alone in this, you don't have to be strong, I wasn't. I still cry every night, wishing out best friend was standing here beside us, telling us to shut up and forgive each other, but she isn't and it's hard." Mia said, rambling. She started off angrily, but soon she was whispering and crying just like I was.

I nodded my head, knowing she was right and Rose would be doing exactly that. Mia shook of Eddie's arms and walked towards me.

"Are you ready to let us in now?" She asked, gripping my arms.

I nodded, throwing my arms around her neck firmly.

"I'm so sorry!" I cried, clutching my other best friend to me like she was about to leave me. She hugged me back just as fiercely and cried right beside me.

"I guess we can forgive you for acting like that," someone else said. I looked over Mia's shoulder and saw Adrian and Sydney standing in the doorway beside Eddie.

"I thought you-"

"You asked us for something and then said sorry, you haven't done that in two months so we knew something was wrong." Adrian stated smiling. I ran towards him and hugged him too.

"I'm sorry for acting like a bitch," I muttered into his shoulder.

He chuckled before saying seriously, "yeah Rose would have killed you for acting like that." I squeezed my eyes shut and let go.

"I know," I whispered before I felt a pair of feminine arms wrap around me.

"But she would be happy that you finally found some sense," Sydney added from behind. I hugged her, pulling back when she did.

"I really shouldn't have tried to deal with this on my own, I already feel better with all of you here." I said, jumping on Eddie for a hug. He laughed and spun me around happily.

"I missed you sister," Eddie said, pulling back and kissing my forehead. I smiled at the term and kissed his cheek.

"You to brother," he smiled at mine and then I felt another pair of arms wrap around my waist.

"Now this is the girl I want to marry," Christian said, kissing my cheek. I smiled sadly and rested my head on his shoulder.

"I don't think Rose would want us talking about her in past tense. The best way to remember her is by living like she is alive. It's the best kind of healing." Adrian said, wrapping his arm around Sydney. Eddie did the same with Mia and we all stood there in a circle looking at each other.

"I've been writing an article about her for the magazine and I'm going to have a little get together at our house in honor of Rose," Sydney stated smiling sadly. We all agreed and told her that was a wonderful idea before sitting down to talk about pictures of Rose and things to remember her by.

"We should put a picture of her and her Aunt in that art show too! " I said, tapping Christian's shoulder. He grabbed his laptop and clicked on the website he was on earlier.

He sent an email to the manager asking if they could and they waited an hour talking before Christian got a reply back saying they had two more opening and they could do it.

Rose is still here, and we need everyone to remember that. She is still alive inside of the pictures she took and the memories she created and those are never going away.

"Everyone will know of Rose and what she has done behind that camera of hers," Mia said smiling at some of Rose's pictures that I kept.

"Well I'm glad that we are putting a picture of her in the art show, because she was always and work of art," Adrian said laughing. We joined him and agreed happily.

We spent the rest of that night planning the remembrance of our best friend.

**Woah, big things have been happening over in California. Lissa isn't handeling the pressure of losing Rose. If she only knew...**

**Anyways, this is a big chapter, hope you like the entrance of her friends again and the cliffhanger that I put in! Please review and I will update soon:)**


	25. Chapter 25

**Sorry everyone I have been very busy as of late! But I'm sure this chapter will make up for it!:) ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

"Okay Rose, you have everything right? Clothes, make-up, your camera, your pictures, the dress and heels, shampoo-"

"Yes I have everything this time!" I exclaimed, pouting as she eyed the bags surrounding me. This was the third time that I had to run back in the house because I forgot something.

"Are you positive?" She repeated, _again_. I looked at John and gave him my best puppy dog eyes asking for help. He looked extremely amused but wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her to him softly.

"Stop worrying about her Dory, she is fine," he said, kissing her cheek. I smiled and looked away when she kissed his lips lovingly. My eyes caught Jeremiah's and he winked at me making me shoot him my signature smirk.

"Alright, lovebirds, let's get going!" I sang, picking my bags up and skipping to the truck. I threw my bags in the back and hopped in the passenger seat. Jeremiah sent me a disgruntled look as he hopped in the backseat but remained quiet as I sent him a dazzling smile.

"Bye Rose, good luck! Call me when you get there Dory, and Jeremiah," John only shot him a look which I laughed at once I saw the innocent smile on Jeremiah's face.

"Bye John!" We chorused, waving as Doreene put the truck into drive and made our way done the road. Excitement had me chatting with them the whole time, we were heading towards the airport to make our way to California for my art show. I was nervous by how fast the time went but also extremely giddy.

"We have to see the beaches too! Oh my god, do you know how many hot, shirtless guys will be roaming on the beach!" I said, licking my lips in anticipation.

"And how many hot, swim-suit models that need help putting tanning oil on their back." Jeremiah added making me laugh and Doreene shake her head.

I don't know how Doreene made it to the airport with the excitement pulsing through the truck. She parked the truck and we slid out, picking up our bags out of the bed and making our way inside.

It was a pretty small airport, seeing as it was a small town and we had to drive thirty minutes to get to one. Doreene led us over to the front desk where we picked up the tickets that John already bought over the phone.

"So, this plane leads straight to the Los Angeles Airport where someone will be waiting to pick us up at take us to the hotel where the other people from the art show." Doreene said quickly while walking us to our terminal. I huffed as I raced to catch up to her, and when I was walking next to her I saw her nervous face.

"What's wrong?" I asked breathlessly. She looked at me from the corner of her eye before looking away quickly.

"I just want to make sure everything goes on like planned," she said simply, looking at the papers in her hand. I didn't fully believe her, but when Jeremiah spoke up beside me, I understood.

"She hasn't left state before," he stated, eyeing Doreene softly. She looked over at him and glared but when she met my gaze she softened and a small sigh escaped her lips.

"Sorry Rose, it's just something different for me, so I want to get everything right." She told me quietly, right as we reached the area where we were to be loading. We sat our stuff down and I grabbed Doreene's hand comforting.

"Everything is going completely fine so relax and have fun, nothing wrong is going to happen." I assured, resting my head on her shoulder like I usually did. She smiled and smoothed down my hair.

"Thank you Rose," she said smiling and looked at something behind me. I felt something lay on my shoulder and then hair was tickling my neck. I looked over and saw Jeremiah's blonde hair in my face as he rested his head on my shoulder.

"What are you doing Jerry?" I asked giggling. He looked up at me with his brown, puppy dog eyes and fluttered his lashes at me.

"I thought we were all laying our heads on the other's shoulders?" He questioned innocently. I laughed and ran my fingers through his hair before laying my head back on Doreene's. People gave us weird glances but we all ignored them and talked quietly to ourselves, laughing sometimes and hitting shoulders at other times.

"Flight 30 now boarding," a voice announced on the intercom. We all stood up and made our way towards the tunnel to board. The lady at the entrance smiled and took our tickets letting us pass through.

There were only two seats a row, so Doreene sat beside me while Jeremiah winked and walked over to a girl with curly brown hair and green eyes. She had a button down shirt and blue jeans with boots over the leg of the jeans. Freckles played across her face and she smiled sweetly and Jeremiah, allowing him to sit beside her.

I shook my head at him and whispered what I saw to Doreene who was looking out the window. She laughed and looked back smiling at the scene.

"And I thought Blane was bad," I commented playfully, giggling as she nodded and laughed along with me.

Flight attendants walked up and down the aisle, closing the luggage bunks and asking passengers to buckle up for take-off. When they were done, they disappeared through a door in the front and not seconds later the plane started moving.

When the plane was in the air, a sign blinked above us signaling that we could take our seatbelts off. I got comfortable, grabbing my camera out of my bag and flickering through my pictures. Doreene leaned back and closed her eyes so she could sleep.

My eyes created a path towards the back where I looked at Jeremiah and that girl who was talking quietly to him while he smiled and listened intently. I giggled softy before snapping a picture of them. It was cute and I made sure to save it and show it to Jeremiah later.

After looking through more of the pictures, I turned it off and packed it away again. I looked out the window, past Doreene's sleeping face and felt my eyes droop with lack of sleep from past nightmares.

"Rose, Rose, wake up sweetie. We're here," Doreene whispered in my ear, awaking me from my much needed sleep. I groaned and rubbed my eyes tiredly before standing up, stumbling when I started feeling light-headed.

"Woah," I breathed, grabbing Doreene's outstretched hand. She laughed and steered me towards the aisle, allowing me to grab my bags and hers before I looked around the empty plane. "Where's Jeremiah?"

"He walked his 'friend' off the plane. He told me that he would meet us outside." She told me grinning. I smirked and followed her off the plane, searching for Jeremiah through the much larger crowds.

"Rosie, Doreene, over here!" I heard him call and I turned to my right to see him standing by a guy in a black suit and black hair holding a sign that said _Rose McNeill_.

John told me that he didn't have any problem with letting me use their last name seeing as I needed one. I smiled at the sign and rushed over to them, nodding to the man.

"Miss McNeil, I am your driver Rick Kregor, I will be driving you to the hotel and then towards the art show tonight. If you have any questions, I will be happy to answer any of them." Rick said giving me a nice smile.

I shook my head at his suggestion and followed him outside towards a black car. It was nice and sleek, making me feel like a famous actress or something. He opened my door and I got in follow by Doreene and then Jeremiah got in last.

"I just need to call John real quick and tell him that we are here," Doreene said, pulling out her phone and dialing the number.

"Hi sweetheart," Doreene started, slapping both Jeremiah and I on the shoulder when we made kissing noises at the phone, "we just arrived."

There was a pause as she listened to John talk. Her eyes grew surprised before angry and then she growled softly. "He did what!" She exclaimed angrily. I leaned over and looked at Jeremiah, and we both mouthed 'Blane'. "Ugh! Tell him that if he tries to make toast again then he will be in trouble by me." She chastised over the phone.

Jeremiah and I laughed at the thought of Blane in the kitchen and Doreene had to 'shush' us twice before we shut up so she could finish her conversation with her husband.

They said a few more things before she hung up with him and grimaced. We gave her a look but she shook her head and muttered a 'don't ask'.

"We are here Miss McNeil," Rick said, stopping in front of a very tall hotel. I gasped at the sight because of how beautiful it was.

"Thank you Rick," I told him, reaching into my wallet and pulling out a twenty. He took it happily and thanked me profoundly. "And please call me Rose; I'm not big on formalities."

"Of course…Rose." He replied, before entering the car and driving forward, away from the hotel.

"So Miss McNeil, lead the way," Jeremiah said, waving me forward dramatically. I slapped his hand away but walked ahead of them both anyways.

I checked us in, grabbing the three room keys and handing one to Jeremiah and one to Doreene. I looked around the enormous lobby, glancing at the groups of people that were most likely in the show tonight. A girl with fine, blonde hair, standing next to a guy with black hair was sitting in some chairs to the right. A red-headed woman was standing next to another woman with black hair, coffee in hand and talking animatedly with the other.

Others were scattered around the room, and I even some girls in bikinis walking out of the elevator. I walked towards it, and put my bags down as did Jeremiah and Doreene as I pressed the 23 button. I hope I'm not scared of heights seeing as I didn't know because I never at heights back in Oregon.

"This is beautiful!" Doreene gasped, walking into room 2304. I repeated her gasp as I looked around the large room. The color was gold and black with pictures of the beach and others sights around Los Angeles. There were three doors, a couch, and a small kitchen filling the room. I was glad that the show was covering hotels prices because this place looked very expensive.

Jeremiah, being the teenager he was, ran towards a door on the left and started jumping on the large bed inside. I was about to follow him, but was stopped by Doreene.

"Jeremiah Fredrick, stop acting like a child and get off the bed!" Doreene chided, pointing towards the ground at her feet as a place for him to move towards.

Grouchily, he got off the bed and made the walk of shame towards where she was standing. I was having a hard time controlling my laughter, but when Jeremiah shot me a look I let it all out.

"Rose McNeil, I know that you were seconds away from doing the same thing so be quiet." My laughter stop and I grumbled under my breath as she pointed at the couch.

"Aww Rosie got in trouble!" Jeremiah sang.

I glared at him for a second before smiling and saying, "I wouldn't be talking Fredrick."

It was his turn to glare and as we were glaring at each other, Doreene huffed and walked away muttering something about children.

"I'm about as old as you Doreene!" I called after her.

"Don't act like it!"

I pouted and walked towards my suitcases and started dragging them to a room. I put the biggest one on the bed and opened it so I could take the clothes out. I put them away in drawers and then hung the dress that I would be wearing tonight in the closet with my heels.

I placed my camera bag on the dresser and then walked towards the bathroom to place my bathroom supplies in.

After everything was where it was supposed to be, I opened the window and gasped at the terrace outside. I opened the door and stepped outside cautiously.

"Oh…my…"I breathed staring at the beautiful view of the ocean in front of me. I had a weird feeling that I was looking at the same thing before but from a different view.

Looking towards the other buildings, I saw a larger glass building that's sign said 'Spirit Magazine'. I frowned, thinking about how weird that name sounded.

Looking back at the ocean, I quickly thought about the pictures I could get and ran towards my camera bag inside, turning on my camera, I pointed it towards the ocean that held a beach on the horizon and a kite flying in the sky.

I took several pictures before turning my camera off and walking back inside.

"We will be leaving in about an hour so I suggest you take a shower now and start getting ready." Doreene said, walking into my room and the same time as me. I nodded, waiting for her to leave the room before grabbing some shorts and a loose shirt to wear before I changed into the dress.

My shower was quick and I used the hairdryer that was supplied to make my hair full and naturally curled. I didn't need to curl my hair thankfully because it was already natural.

I walked out and grabbed my makeup out of my bag, walking back into the bathroom and applying a little powder, blush, eyeliner, mascara, and a gold eye-shadow with a red tint to match my dress.

I walked back into my room and pulled the dress out of the closet, switching out of my regular clothes and into it.

The dress was stunning. Loose red cloth made a strand over both shoulders and curved into a 'v' above my chest. From my chest to my waist, red and gold sequins glittered and wrapped around my frame. The same soft, see-through red material on the sleeves swayed out so I could feel the silky texture run down my legs. Unlike the other dresses that poofed out, this one traveled straight down to show my slip form.

The heels were red and a gold lining on the bottom to keep with the colors. I walked shakily towards the mirror, stunned as I saw my reflection in the mirror. It looked gorgeous on me, I looked gorgeous with it on, and it was amazing. I haven't felt this good about myself since the day I woke up in the hospital.

It was hard, but I covered up the scar on my face slightly so it wasn't as pronounced. You could still see it, but not as much. I couldn't do much about my arms since they weren't covered, but after walking around the town for a month, I didn't care about what I looked like.

"Rose?" Doreene said as she opening my door. I turned to her and gasped at the same she did. I don't think I have ever seen her in a dress before, and she looked beautiful.

"Doreene you look gorgeous," I told her grinning.

"Well you look stunning Rose." She stated, returning the smile. I walked towards my camera and pulled her arm towards the living room where Jeremiah was sitting with an actual suit on, pulling at the neck tie nervously.

When we walked in, he jumped up, eyes widened at the two older women in front of him.

"Whoa," he breathed.

"That's all you got Jerry?" I smirked, twirling Doreene around. She did the same to me and we laughed. "Come on Doreene, stand next to Jeremiah so I can take a picture!"

She did as I said and they took a few before Doreen grabbed my camera and told me to stand next to him next. I walked over and wrapped my arm around his waist smiling happily into the camera. Jeremiah poked me in the stomach as the camera flashed and I knew that I must have had a weird expression on my face so I punched him in the arm.

We were finally able to take some pictures and after I took some with Doreene I put the camera on a table high enough to capture all of us and put it on a timer so we could take a group picture.

"Okay, let me grab my folder and we can go," I told them, taking my camera and putting it in the bag before grabbing it and my folder and following the two out of the door.

As told, Rick was waiting outside for us when we got there. He complimented us and opened the door for us to get in.

He drove us through the streets of Los Angeles, pulling up fifteen minutes later to a large white building lined up with people buying tickets to get in. Nerves started kicking in as we pulled up.

What if they look at my picture and are disgusted? What if they were just kidding and really didn't like it? What if-

"Rosie, you okay in there?" Jeremiah asked, waiting by the side of the car where my door was open. He bent down, and touched my knee comforting. When I didn't say anything and look at him in pure panic he kissed my forehead and took my hand. "They will love your pictures Rosie; you are one of the best out there. Don't worry, let's go enjoy the other pictures and watch the critic's jaws drop in disbelief when they see yours."

I took a deep breath and nodded, letting him pull me out of the car. Doreene sent me a sympathetic look and I smiled at her softly.

We all walked up the steps, waiting for Doreene to take the passes out of her purse. The women nodded and allowed us in.

I took in the sights around me as we walked in feeling as if I looked like a fish. Jeremiah laughed at me, but otherwise had the same look on his face as I did. We walked around the open space, looking at the pictures and drawings that people drew. There were even sculptures and other clay objects that people had made.

A large group of people were standing by one of the pieces of work. Curious, I walked towards them, wondering what they were looking at.

I stared in amazement when I saw multiple photos enlarged in frames scattered around the section of the wall. They left me stunned and when I felt a hand on my shoulder I jumped.

"Told you so," Jeremiah whispered in my ear as he looked at the group of people staring at my pictures. Most looked amazed and some were smiling and writing something onto a piece of paper.

"This is beautiful; I want to meet the person who took these so I can have her take pictures for my company!" A woman exclaimed, looking at the pictures overjoyed. Frozen, Jeremiah walked forward before I could stop him and started talking to the woman before pointing my way.

"What is that boy doing?" Doreene asked, walking up. I stood wide-eyed, not answering as she walked towards me and shook my hand.

"Hello, my dear, I am Evalign Carter, you must be the famous Rose McNeil that has taken these wonderful pictures here!" She exclaimed, wavering her hand towards my sea of photos.

"I am," I said, surprised when my voice sounded normal and composed.

"I am from the New York Times looking for someone like you to work for us as a photographer. You seem like the right girl for the job since I can see the talent you have-"

She continued talking, and soon she wasn't the only one offering me a job. People were talking to me left and right telling me how great I photographer I was. I didn't know how to deal with this, but somehow I ended up standing alone as Jeremiah and Doreene conversed together on the other side of the room.

"Ma'am?" Someone said from behind me. I turned around and looked at the brown-headed girl standing there. She had brown eyes and freckles covering her pale face and I could see her eyes wide and wondering.

"Yes," I asked her, wondering if she was part of another company.

"I was standing next to my father earlier while he talked to you about a job and I know I recognized you, there is only a small difference…"

"What?" I asked impatiently, wondering when this girl was going to spit it out.

"I think it would be easier for you to see than for me to tell you." She stated, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards a section that I haven't looked at yet. A small group of people were standing there when she pulled me up and she pointed towards a large picture mounted on the wall…of me?

What the hell?

I stumbled over to the picture and read the inscription on it.

_In memory of Rosemarie Hathaway, a wonderful daughter, friend, and photographer. Forever in our hearts._

I could feel my heart thudding in my chest as I stared at it, feeling like I knew what was going on. Around the picture of my by in a white dress by a rail beside the ocean was other pictures of me at random times. I felt like I was being suffocated, and I felt myself slide to my knees.

What was going on? I was…I was Rosemarie Hathaway, I was this girl.

This dead girl.

"Rose? Rose! Move will you!" I knew the voice but I didn't look up from the picture of me. Someone moved in front of me and my eyes met theirs. "Rose what is wrong?" Jeremiah asked, noticing my shaking figure.

"I-I," I stuttered, finally pointing at the picture behind him. He turned around and I could read the expression on his face but he looked at the words below it before turning around and kneeling beside me once more.

"Doreene," Jeremiah called loudly over the sea of people. I heard scuffling before she was kneeling beside me too, but she had seen the picture first and looked pale.

"We need to find the people responsible for this," Doreene said, helping my frozen form up. I felt my legs give out and Jeremiah caught me before I could fall, lifting me up in my arms. I continued to stare at the picture, feeling an intense headache starting in my head.

_I was dead, I was dead, I was dead, _the words echoed in my head. Jeremiah carried me out of sight of the place and opened a random door in a hallway. The room had a long table and chairs around it.

He sat me down on a couch I didn't see and told me to wait here while he walked back out of the room. I think I started hyperventilating. These people…they think I'm dead, I don't know who they are and I was so lost I could feel my vision wavering.

I needed to see it again, I had to remember!

I got up, my legs shaking, and walked towards the door, opening it and walking down the long hallway where Jeremiah had taken me.

Once I got to the main exhibit area again I noticed a large crowd gathered around my picture. I started walked towards them but stopped when I noticed a vaguely familiar face in the crowd, and like she knew I was staring at her, she turned and caught my eyes.

**So, yes another cliffhanger:) Who is it? haha please review and tell me what you think! Poor Rose and having to deal with her own death! Next chapter will be up (hopefully) soon!**


	26. Chapter 26

**So I am extremely happy about the reviews! I got 23, which is a new record! Thank you for liking this story and I know Iknow...Damn me ;) Here is the next chapter...ENJOY!**

**R****POV**

Only a few amounts of people know what it feels like to lose your memory and they can also tell you that it sucks when your best friend sees you and you don't remember anything about them. I was one of the few, however, that ends up in a different state after being abused and raped and then comes to an art convention and finds out that I am actually a dead person being honored.

Its worse when a girl runs up you, a girl that you have only seen in dreams, and starts crying in your arms and repeating the words 'your alive'.

It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to push away from her in terror because you can't believe she is real. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to see five other people run up and hug you with a picture of yourself still hanging on wall with your name after the words 'in memory of'.

It wouldn't be so bad if these things didn't happen, but it is happening and it is that bad.

It was as if a bubble formed around my body, muting their voices, and making them move in slow motion. I couldn't catch hold of my mind long enough to focus and my thoughts and figure out what was happening.

While I was thinking this though, the voices started getting louder and my vision started getting clearer and sharper. I could finally focus on what was going on and connect the events that happened so I could try and convince myself that it was real.

"Stay away from her," Jeremiah yelled from where I was blocked by his form. His body was shaking and I was wondering if it was from anger or from the motions he was making with his hands.

Looking down, it wasn't either of those. My hands, clenched to his t-shirt, were shaking badly being the source of his shaking also. Slowly, I unwrapped my hands from him, trying to calm myself down and stop the shaking.

"Let's take this somewhere else," Doreene said, touching my shoulder comfortingly. I breathed in deeply to control myself…it didn't work.

I felt myself start walking and I didn't say a word because I was scared to speak, so I started thinking.

_That girl, she is from my dream…Liss was her name. She's my best friend, I think, and she was getting married to that guy with the midnight black hair and crystal blue eyes. They're from my past, they are real and I finally found them, are they even my family? I sure hope they are, I won't be able to think that they didn't want anything to do with me._

"Rose," Doreene whispered in my ear, obviously worried about my state of mind. I looked at her and saw her waiting for me to say something…anything.

"I-I," I looked at Liss, "I know you."

"You do?" Doreene said surprised. I looked at her and nodded.

"She's the one in my dreams," I whispered to her, though I was still staring directly at her. Her hands were trembling, she looked like she just saw a ghost, and tears were still falling from her red eyes.

"Dreams? How do you know me only from dreams?" Liss said standing up quickly, almost frantic. I scooted away from her instantly, slightly scared but the look in her eyes. She saw this and her face softened considerably. "What happened to you Rose?"

I didn't know how to answer that, mostly because I really didn't know what happened to me and mostly because I don't know what she asking.

"Where have you been?" A guy with brown hair, muscles, and brown eyes asked.

"Oregon," I said instantly, knowing how to answer that question.

"Oregon!" A short girl with blonde curly hair squealed, surprise flickering over her features.

"Why didn't you come back?" Liss's fiancé asked…Christian I think.

"She couldn't," Jeremiah piped in, grabbing my hand.

"And who are you?" The last guy said, leaning forward. He had dirty brown hair that fell in front of his face and green eyes.

"Jeremiah, Rose's friend," he stated, pulling me closer. I smiled at his protectiveness but decided that I needed to come in now.

"I woke up in a hospital about two months ago," I started, making their eyes flicker towards me, "I didn't know what happened, except that my body was beat and I didn't have any strength in my legs or arms. I had cuts covering my whole body, but few became scars," I said, fingering the lines on my arm.

"Oh my god," Liss breathed, pulling a hand over her mouth. The others had the same look of horror on their faces too.

"Doreene," I pointed to her, "and John, her husband, found me in one of their fields. I was carried to their house and they called 911…well that's what they told me happened. I don't remember."

"When the doctor came in, after I woke up, he asked me for some information and I found out…" my breathing stuttered and I closed my eyes, "I found out that I was raped repeatedly and had a concussion that made me lose my memory," I whispered, tears leaking from my eyes.

By now, the others were very close to tears and I tried not to look at them by covering my eyes.

"Rose, I am so sorry, I can't believe that creep would do that to you! I want to go and beat the living shit out of him right now and I just…I'm but I can't believe that you're alive! I mean they searched for you everywhere but they called off the search and proclaimed you dead!" She sobbed, getting up and sitting down so she was closer to me in the small office that they found.

"Please, you have to tell me what happened, I don't know anything besides my name and your name and that you and him are getting married," I said pointing to Christian.

"How did you remember my name?" She asked first.

"At first, it was a memory that I had while I was sitting down, but then I started having dreams about you, and I know your name is Liss and his Christian." I said, looking between them.

"That's the name you always called me, but everyone else calls me Lissa, and my full name is Vasilisa Dragomir, and my fiancé, his name is Christian Ozera." She said, only correcting her name and adding their last names.

"Okay Lissa," I said nodding.

"The girl with the curly blonde hair is Mia Rinaldi, and that is her boyfriend Eddie Castille. The guy with the shaggy brown hair is Adrian Ivashkov and the girl with the blonde hair is his girlfriend Sydney Sage." She said, pointing each of them out for me.

"Thank you," I said quietly, trying to unlock my memories with their names, "and my name is Rosemarie Hathaway?" I asked, unsure if that was the name on the panel under the picture.

"Yes, your mom is Janine Hathaway and your father is Abe Mazur," she added, looking at the others for a quick second, "we are actually having a memorial service at my house after this but, I think your parents and some of the others would be overwhelmed and excited to see you there. It would change everything," she breathed, laughing shortly.

"Oh, um," I looked at Doreene, wondering if I should do it or not.

"It's up to you Rose, we will follow you in whatever you do," she said grabbing my hand. I looked at her for a few more seconds before turning towards them and nodding.

"I'll go," I whispered, smiling shortly at Lissa. She grinned and stood up, hesitantly taking a step forward.

"Do you…do you think…" she couldn't figure out how to get it out but I understood.

"I-sure," I said standing up and walking towards her. A happy gleam shone in her eyes as she launched her arms around my neck and hugged me fiercely. I couldn't deny her the chance because after finding out your best friend isn't dead and has lost her memory is sure to be hard on her.

"Oh, I can't wait for Dimitri to see you! He is going to be so happy and overjoyed that you're alive!" She exclaimed looking towards the others. They all nodded, smiling widely.

"Who's Dimitri?" I asked confused. Lissa's mouth turned into a little 'o' shape and she looked away. Christian and Adrian grimaced, Mia and Sydney bit their bottom lip, and Eddie shook his head.

"He's Christian's cousin that stayed at your house for the wedding. You guys kind of hit it off and were good friends…" she didn't say anything else, but she didn't have to.

"Oh," I stated, breathing in deeply. Looking towards Jeremiah, I noticed the way his eyebrows scrunched together like he was thinking hard about something.

"Well, I'm sure that it would be a surprise for him," I replied, not knowing what else to say. Adrian looked at…Sydney-I think- and took her hand in his. She looked like she was holding herself back from saying something. I caught her eye and cocked my head to the side, urging her to say what was on her

"I-I just wanted to ask about your photos'. You're here because you got accepted right?" She asked shyly, either hiding her eyes or looking at Adrian is support.

"Yes, I was searching for an art show to place my photos in and found this one. I sent in my form and pictures straight away." I told her, smiling as I remembered the excitement I felt when I found out that they picked me.

"Really, you searched for a photo show? No one had to make you?" Mia exclaimed, shock covering her features, as well as each of the others. I felt wary as I took in their disbelieving faces.

"No…" I trailed off, scrunching my eyebrows together.

"We could never get you to do this! We told you every day that you needed to put your pictures into one of these but I continued to say that the pictures were too personal for you." I took that in, a part of me wondering why I never did it. "The only time your photos were shown was in the magazine company you worked for."

"Magazine company?" I asked shocked. "What magazine company?"

"Spirit Magazine," said Sydney, smiling sadly, "I was your assistant." A memory flashed in my mind, showing me a picture of a large building next to our hotel with the words 'Spirit Magazine' written on a sign.

"It's by my hotel," I stated, looking at them, laughing at the irony in the situation.

"You were the best photographer they ever had, and you got the job done. No matter how mean or hard on them you were, they always came back because you were that good." Eddie said smirking. I smiled, amazed at the life I had before everything happened.

"What happened?" I asked after a few seconds of it sinking in; all of them looked confused except one, Christian.

"You got a call at work one day," he started, pausing as realization dawn on everyone's faces, "some man was on the phone telling you to meet him at Cold Wood Park, threatening your father's life."

"Before this happened though, your mom had shown up at your house, telling you that your father had been gone for a while and that he always came back in a week," Lissa cut in, sympathy on her face.

"Anyway, he asked you to meet him because you wouldn't give the whereabouts of your mom, so he told you to come." Christian continued, grimacing as he told my story.

"I'm sorry but you can't be in here."

All of us turned to look at the security guard standing by the door; he was holding the door open awkwardly and gave us a sorry look.

"It's fine," Doreene said, stepping up for us. She nodded her head to everyone and we all walked through the door and into the hallway.

"How about we continue this at my house, the others can help me explain," Lissa proposed, looking at us unsure.

"Sure," I agreed, the only part of the story they told me still running through my head. I looked up at everyone and then looked away, "I'll be right back though, I just need a second alone."

All of them agreed kindly and smiled as I turned around and walked back into the gallery. I saw many people looking at me strangely from the last episode I had.

Ignoring them I walked towards the now empty exhibit, staring at my face once more. I sat down in my dress and heels, hugging my legs to me. I know I agreed to this and of course I want to learn about my past…haven't I wanted that since day one? It was just a little too much to take in all at once.

Sitting there, I continued to look at the pictures while I thought the people's lives I was about to affect in little over an hour. How would they feel when they saw me alive? Happy? Scared?

Before I knew it, my eyes filled and I bent my head in and silently let the tears fall.

**LPOV **

I stared at her shaking form as she sunk in on herself and cried. I wanted to comfort her, but it was hard to know what she wanted and needed since she was different and barely knew me.

Selfishly, I was happy…extremely happy. She was alive, here, and alive. I couldn't believe it. These people, Doreene and John, found her while she was probably dying and saved her life. They didn't know her name and neither did she when she woke up.

She couldn't come home because of the memory loss. All of this time, she was struggling to regain her memory of us while we sat here and mourned her death. The police gave up too quickly! Did they even check the field that her blood stopped in? Ask the owners if they know anything?

No, they didn't.

I sighed in frustration but couldn't stop the happy vibe that was still buzzing inside of me. She was in the worst pain imaginable…a kind of pain that she couldn't even feel. She didn't know what she had gone through, she only knows that she was sexually abused but she doesn't know the details.

I wanted her memories to come back but I was selfish to think so because I was only worried about her not remembering me. But once she remembers, she will be depressed and will be tortured by her own mind. It will be too much for her.

Tears formed for my best friend, I wish that this never happened to her.

"Thank you," said Eddie beside me, though he wasn't talking to me. I turned and saw his hand on Doreene's shoulder, "Rose wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for you and your husband. She is very close to a sister of mine, and it has been hard for each of us to live without her in our lives."

"She has been a very big part of our group, holding us together like glue. She was the center of our friendship and helped each of us whenever she could. She would take a bullet for us if she had too; she is so selfless and good-hearted that it's hard to imagine a world without her." Mia continued, light tears tickling her eyes. I felt my own threatening to spill over.

"Rose is a wonderful person; I believe that is the reason John and I visited her every day until she woke up. She had this…fight in her that was unbelievable with the condition we found her in. John and I talked about it, and we decided that we had a place for her to stay until the results of her test were in."

"Tests?" Adrian asked surprised.

"Identity tests," Doreene continued, "we helped her pick out a room and let her decorate to her liking. She took a liking on a camera and I bought it for her…she had a memory by touching it and I saw the longing in her eyes…"

"The camera has always been her life, since she was little. I'm not surprised that she found it again." I said, looking at her hunched shoulders.

Doreene had a thoughtful look on her face when I turned back before she shook herself and starting talking again.

"She was in a wheelchair for a couple weeks because of the weakness in her legs. She had to eat a lot to gain her strength back, she was very malnourished and he bones were weak and fragile…so was the rest of her body but after a few weeks in the hospital she was fine again….well as fine as she could be."

I closed my eyes, grasping Christian's hand for support. I heard him suck in a ragged breath and pull me closer. No matter how many times him and Rose bickered, he still cared about Rose deeply, just as everyone else did.

We all went silent, staring at her form. She stared up at her picture and with a deep breath, stood up and turned away from it. Walking towards us slowly, you could see the red in her eyes and the lost expression on her face. She didn't know what to do anymore.

"Ok, I'm good now," she said, meeting my eyes and giving me a small smile. I wrapped an arm around her shoulders lightly, cautious not to scare her.

"Do you want to meet us there, or do you want to ride with us?" I asked her, hope lighting up in me.

Her eyes flickered to Doreene and Jeremiah-who had been awfully silent- and shook her head. "I'll meet you there; can you just give us directions?"

I told her the directions and in seconds, she was walking away again with Doreene's arm around her shoulder, and Jeremiah's hand gripping her tightly. I sighed, knowing those were the only true things she was comfortable around right now.

It still hurt though.

**RPOV **

We walked towards the black car in silence, none of us knowing what to say. I was gripping Jeremiah's hand tightly in mine, snuggled under Doreene's arm in comfort. Both of them wore thoughtful looks on their faces, thinking over what had just happened.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, looking down.

"Sorry?" Jeremiah exclaimed, earning a few looks from the surrounding people. "What in earth is there to be sorry for?"

"For ruining the your first out-of-state experience, I didn't mean for all of this to happen-"

"She was right," Jeremiah muttered shaking his head, "you're so selfless."

"Selfless? I'm selfish for wanting to go to Lissa's house and not letting you have a say in any of it. I'm selfish for wanting to know this piece of my past while keeping you in the background! I'm not selfless," I finished, looking away sadly.

Rick, noticing the tense atmosphere as he opened our doors, only nodded to us before shutting it after we were inside. I told him the directions that we needed to go to and soon we were driving off.

"Rose, you might think that those things make you selfish but they don't. This is your life, a chance to reestablish who you really are, and we know how much you have wanted this, and we will be by you every step of the way because we want the same thing for you." Said Doreene sternly, but with a motherly tone.

Jeremiah added, "And we are fine with you keeping us back there, you are just interested in what it going on and we understand."

"But-" I pouted as they gave me short looks to be quiet.

Doreene changed subjects, though not from the current topic completely as she said, "How do you feel about all of this?"

I stared at the out the front window, being I was in the middle of Jeremiah and Doreene, and thought about what she asked. Finally, I said, "confused, happy, frustrated, sad, but I guess the biggest thing I feel right now is lost. I don't know what's going on, and I know I should know all of them, but I don't and I'm just trying to go along with everything. I find out I was pronounced dead…how do I deal with something like this…with everyone thinking that I was somewhere buried dead. It's like seeing the future and wondering what happened to get this way…"

I breathed out, cutting off my rambling. My nerves were getting the best of me and I was listing off possibility after possibility.

"That's not unusual to feel like that, though the situation sure is, and I can't say I don't know what you're feeling, but I will be here to work it out with you." Doreene murmured, wrapping her arm around me.

"Thank you," I whispered, closing my eyes and resting my head on her shoulder like usual. After a few seconds, I felt Jeremiah's head lay down on my shoulder, just like he did at the airport. I looked over at him, and he smiled.

"I thought we were doing that thing again…you know with the head on shoulder thing." He stated awkwardly, breaking off a piece of the tension I was feeling in my body. I loosened up, knowing that with them by my side, nothing could really go wrong.

**So what do you think? The memorial/welcomehome party is in the next chapter, and maybe a little Dimitri point of view:) Please review and until next time :D**


	27. Chapter 27

**Well I am extremely happy about the amount of reviews I recieved. I'm sorry it took so long but I have been really busy and couldn't write. Tonight I got a free night and wrote it all cause I couldn't keep you hanging forever! Please ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

"This…is where…she lives?" I stuttered, my mouth dropping open in pure shock. Neither Doreene, nor Jeremiah could answer me because they were in the same position as me. I was about to tell Rick that it was the wrong house, until I saw Lissa poke her head out the front door and wave at us.

Her large driveway was empty but seeing a garage on the right, I guessed that was where they kept theirs. The house was three stories high and had patios from a door in every room sticking out in front. Large palm trees covered the yard and encased the house in shadows, with only a few light poles running down the driveway.

I reached over Jeremiah, who still sat stunned, and opened the door. He finally responded when I pulled back and pushed the door open smoothly. I slid out after him, still tightly holding Doreene's hand, and breathed in the warm, salty air.

"This is beautiful; we don't see much of this in Oklahoma." Doreene said, showing some amusement. She failed to lighten the mood, however, and just ushered us towards Lissa who was still waiting for us at the door.

"You didn't tell us you lived in a mansion!" I exclaimed as I walked beside her inside. A deep sadness fell into her eyes as she held a faraway look.

"My parents died in a car accident when I was younger. They owned a big law firm in Montana and had saved up a lot of money for my brother and I for college. My brother was also in the accident, which left me to inherit all of the money." She said smiling sarcastically. I grimaced at what she had said and told her I was sorry. "Its fine, when I met you in college, you really helped me heal…even after 10 years. Chris came afterwards and he kind of finished my healing. That's why you're my best friend and that's why I'm marrying him." She said, slipping her arms around Christian-who had been standing in a large living room when we entered.

I bit my lip, feeling bad because I couldn't remember my best friend. I hated that I had to live with everyone else's pain.

"No, no Rose it's not your fault!" Lissa exclaimed, throwing her arms around me. I must have looked pretty tortured by the looks the others were giving me.

"I'm sorry I can't remember," I whispered awkwardly as she continued hugging me.

"It's not your fault Rose, it's Nathan's." Nathan.

Nathan…

Who's Nathan?

Oh.

"That's him? Nathan?" I asked, shaking. Knowing his name made it worse to think about and take in. It made it more real.

"Don't worry, that son of a bitch is locked away in prison right now," Adrian said from my right. My brain was slightly hazy as I took in what everyone was saying.

"Prison," I breathed, neither feeling happy or content.

"He won't hurt you ever again," Lissa stated, gripping my arms. I frowned, knowing that he is hurting me, though not physically. As is Lissa heard my thoughts, she grimaced.

"When is everyone else coming?" I asked, stepping out of her arms as I changed the subject. She seemed to understand my need for space because she backed up until she was wrapped up in Christian's arms.

"They should be over in about 10 minutes, that's when we told everybody to come." Christian spoke up, kissing the top of Lissa's head in comfort.

"What-who's-"I didn't really know how to phrase my questions and I felt Jeremiah creep up to my left and pull me into his side.

"What are they going to think and who is coming?" He said, looking at me for confirmation.

"I think we should explain to them everything that happened tonight while you three stand in the other room." Eddie suggested, looking towards Lissa.

"No they won't think anything of Jeremiah and Mrs. McNeil. Let them stay in here, they can help us explain what has happened and then when we think they are ready…we can ask Rose to come in." Mia said, looking at me apologetically. I turned towards Lissa and Christian and waited for them to decide.

"That would probably be best," Lissa replied softly.

"We don't want to hide you Rose, trust us, but after losing you and then seeing you again…they won't see it coming and the unpredictable could happen." Sydney said speaking what was on everyone's mind. I nodded at her in understanding and opened my mouth to say something when the doorbell rang.

I suddenly froze in fear.

They never told me who was coming, I didn't know what to expect. Didn't they say something about my parents? Or that guy Dimitri? Yes that's his name…maybe it's him.

Christian walked towards the hallway while Lissa walked towards me quickly and took me out of the room and towards another room…the kitchen to be more exact.

She started, "you will be able to hear what's going on from here Rose. You will know when to come out…or I'll come get you." She smiled softly, squeezing my hand, before returning into the other room. Shakily, I sat down in the closet chair and pulled my knees up to my chest resting my chin on them timidly.

I could hear small chatter coming from the room I just exited and but I couldn't distinguish what was being said. I waited for them to start talking louder and finally, I heard Lissa address them…whoever 'them' was.

"I'm so glad that you guys could come!"

"Of course Lissa, we wouldn't miss this for the world," a man's voice said with a hint of sadness.

"I hope not, because something unexpected has happened that we need to tell everyone about," Lissa replied happily. I grimaced, _unexpected _was right for the both of us.

"What happened, Lissa?" Another voice asked. It was another man's, and my eyes furrowed in thought. Who were these guys?

"You have to promise not to freak out or call any of us crazy."

"We promise," the three voices chorused. _Wait…three?_

"Well you know how we put Rose's picture up at the art show right?" She paused and I could picture the three unknown guys nodding their head. "Well we went to look at some of the other exhibits and when we came back, we saw two people asking others who put the pictures up. Jeremiah, Doreene are here with us now," she paused again, "and they also brought someone else part of all of the drama.

"We were all shocked but they told us their story and…" figuring this was my time to walk in, I stood up, my legs shaking dramatically, and stuttered my way down the hall where Lissa was waiting with her hand held out.

Taking her hand, I took my first steps into the room, looking down the entire time. I heard three gasps and a "oh my god" before silence encased the room.

"Rose," one of them gasped. I peeked up through my hair and saw three unnaturally good-looking guys. One was lean with a baby boy face but had muscles on his arms. Another was tall and buff, and the last one was muscled, awkwardly looking at me…well they were all looking at me.

"Hi," I whispered, not knowing who they were.

"This is impossible," the one on the right breathed.

"It can't be, they never found her, and the police just said she was dead." I flinched as Christian said that but kept looking at their reactions.

It took some time but smiles popped onto their faces rhythmically and ran over to me with arms wide open.

"Wait!" Lissa exclaimed, seeing my terrified face. I took a step back, crossing my arms over my chest.

"She lost her memory," Mia explained from her spot in the living room.

"She- how?" The one in the middle yelled, making me flinch again.

"Too much damage was done to her body and head making her have minimal brain damage. She can't remember anything from her past life." Doreene spoke up, placing her hand comfortingly on my shoulders. I leaned into her, trying to keep the familiar feeling close instead of the fear and confusion I was currently feeling.

"So she doesn't remember us?" The last guy said looking at me sadly. I was starting to get annoyed that they were talking about me like I wasn't in the room. I took a step forward, crossing my arms in a fiercer manner.

"No, _she _doesn't remember any of you." I stated growling. They grimaced as they caught on to what was happening.

"Sorry Rose, but this is all so surreal to us." The one in the middle said to me. I shook my head, blushing at the realization that I was standing in the middle of the room with all eyes on me. I took a step back and dropped my head again, suddenly finding interest in my shoes.

"I think you guys better introduce yourselves to Rose," Lissa said, trying to change the subject.

"Oh that would be a good idea," middle guy said bashfully. I looked up at them shyly, waiting for them to introduce themselves. "I'm Denis, and this is Artur and Lev," he, Denis, continued.

I tried to connect their names to something…_anything_…but nothing clicked.

"I'm sorry," I said sadly, shaking my head in denial. Their faces fell and the guy on the right…Lev…looked at the others before speaking.

"You were our photographer at Spirit Magazine; we were the male models there. You were like a little sister to us…a very hard ass little sister." He said, chuckling as he looked at the guys beside him and then at me, trying to diffuse the tension.

Models, they sure did look like models. With all of them being here…it made the truth hit me that I really was a professional photographer and I shook my head in disbelief.

"I guess this isn't a remembrance party after all," Artur said smiling.

"More of a welcome home party," Denis said smiling brightly at me. I couldn't help for that spilt second to smile back at him with the same intensity. Though it was a lot to take in, I was glad that my prayers have finally been answered. I was finally learning about my life all over again.

I talked to the boys for ten minutes, sensing how much they reminded me of Jeremiah, Lucas, and Blane. Man, that life with them and John and Doreene, seemed so far away now. The farm, my room, and Koko seemed millions of light years away.

The doorbell rang again, and I started back towards my spot in the kitchen. Lissa explained that they were going to do the same thing for the next group of people seeing as how it worked out so well the first time.

Murmured voices broke the silence once more and I wasn't as nervous this time. I stood by the kitchen door, looking down the hallway, waiting for Lissa to stick her head out and motion me towards her. A lot more people were here now; it was like a whole group decided to show at once. I peered down the hallway anxiously, listening to Lissa explain the same things she explained to the boys.

Too soon for my taste, Lissa peered through the door, and anxiety passed through her eyes. Before I could meet her by the entrance of the living room, she came up to me and took my shoulders in her hands.

"Rose, your mom and dad are in there so it might be a little harder to get through." My breath caught, my parents were right there…my _parents. _"Breath Rose, it will be fine."

I nodded, my fingers clenching together tightly. I followed her into the room, my eyes locked open, opposite to when they were staring down at my shoes the first time. Mia, Sydney, and Eddie smiled at me sympathetically, and Adrian, Christian, and Jeremiah gave me thumbs up.

I looked around the room, meeting the eyes of the new arrivals. My eyes met those of a small woman with shocking red hair and green eyes. Her face was paler than a ghost and her eyes were as wide as a saucer. It happened so fast that it didn't connect until she was lying on the ground motionless.

"What-What happened to her? Is she going to be alright? Oh my gosh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"She fainted, Kiz," another man said looking between me and her. I realized he was standing right next to her, also very pale and breathless.

"Kiz?" I asked in a small voice, knowing for some weird reason what that meant. "That means daughter, which means…"

"Oh my god," he breathed, kneeling down by the woman and moving his hand over his mouth. In his eyes, tears started brimming, and soon he was crying. My body shook and I found out that I was crying too, because after all this time, finally meeting my parents was overwhelming.

"Dad?" I choked out, clutching my sides to hold myself together. All he did was nod, only second away from fainting himself. He moved his free arm so it was open for me to go to him. Letting a sob come out, I ran and threw myself into his arms, crying into his chest. I felt at home in his arms, and it felt normal. I was hugging my _dad, _not John, not Doreene, but my biological father.

"Abe," the woman croaked from beside us. I pulled away, looking at her as she sat up, slowly moving away from us.

"Janine," he replied, opening his arm the same way he did for me. She shook her head, however, scrambling to put as much space between us as possible.

"It's not possible," she stuttered, tears streaming down her face.

"It is possible Janine, it's our daughter, she right here in my arms, in the flesh," he told her calmly, with a slight shaking in his voice. I looked her straight in the eyes again, understanding flittering into my mind…this was my _mother. _

I took in her features, looking at her everywhere. She looked at me in fear, like she was didn't want to come near in fear of me being unreal.

"Mom?" I whispered, stretching my fingers towards her. She looked at them, flinching back in pure fear.

"Mrs. Hathaway, we can assure you that Rose is really here," Lissa said speaking up. My mom looked up at her in confusion.

"How do you know?" She asked terrified, "what if this is a trap?"

"This isn't a trap, she was found in the field by Doreene and her husband John and they took her to the hospital because she was dying. They saved her life, she's alive." Lissa replied, trying to be the voice of reason.

"Alive," she breathed, finally looking at me with a different light. I wanted to run over and hug her too, but I didn't want to scare her. Ironic wasn't it?

"Rose," she breathed before her expression completely changed into one of wonder. She ran back over towards me, hugging me twice as hard as my father had. "You're actually here, you're actually alive."

She continued to whisper things like that in my ear and I just hugged her tighter. My dad put his arms around the both of us and I was engulfed with family and love.

It felt amazing.

When we pulled away, everyone else was crying too. Lissa smiled through the tears and nodded her head; Doreene wiped her eyes and smiled sadly at me.

"Tell us what happened," my dad said, pointing his question towards the two previously mentioned. They looked at each other and hesitated.

"They want to wait for everyone to get here first," I told him softly, standing up. Not letting go, they both got up with me.

"Actually Rose, everyone is here," Eddie stated, pointing behind me. I turned around, looking at the people staring at me as I stared at them. There were at least ten people there, and I didn't know any of them.

"We came in while you were reuniting with your parents, it's such a surprise, its unexpected, but I believed that you were never dead. I believed that you are alive the whole time but I couldn't convince the police of it." A woman said standing in the front. I looked her over slowly, trying to fit a face with a name.

"Who are you?" I asked her, also adding all of the others behind her into the mix. She looked shocked, glancing behind me and meeting someone's-probably Lissa's- eyes.

"I think we should all sit down so we can explain." Lissa stated finally.

"Doreene how about you explain finding her first," Lissa said once we were all situated. I sat between my mom and dad, holding each of their hands.

"Well, my husband John was out checking a water pipe in one of our fields in Oregon when he spotted her lying face down, bleeding and exposed." She looked at me to approve her word choice and I nodded. "He carried her back to our house and I got my first aid out while John called 911.

"I tried cleaning her wounds as best as I could, and I thought I lost her when she passed out. We found out later that she had fallen into a coma." She cleared her throats, her eyes lost in thought. "When an ambulance arrived, they took her to the hospital and healed her as best as they could. She was on the verge of death, and her heart actually stopped beating once, but they restarted it quickly.

"When she was stable, they put her in a hospital room until she fully recovered. John and I visited often and her body was covered with scars-they told us later it was a knife- and bruises littered her body."

I could feel my parents tense and flinch as they listened to Doreene talk. I wanted to comfort them but I didn't know how. I might have known somewhere deep inside of me that they were my parents, but sadly I still didn't know anything about them.

"Her right leg was severely broken and the other one was so badly damaged that she wouldn't be able to use it or the other one for a while. She had a large concussion on the back of her head and four broken ribs too. Her arm was broken and her shoulder was dislocated but it wasn't the worst part that happened to her." Doreene looked at me and nodded for me to take over.

"I woke up in the hospital, disorientated and scared. I was in a coma for two days before I woke up. The doctor looked sympathetic, and worried when he asked me if I knew why I was in the hospital." I gulped, looking down at my lap. "I later found out that I had memory loss."

"How bad?" My mom asked desperately.

"I don't remember anything about my life since the time I woke up from the coma." I stated sadly. "Sadly, as Doreene mentioned, it wasn't the worst part…"

I breathed in and opened my mouth but it was too hard to get out. I could only picture the guy in my dreams over and over again hitting me, cutting me…

"I'm sorry; I really don't think I can do this." I said quickly, standing up and running from the room. I didn't know where to go, but as I ran towards the front door, it opened and sent me sprawling to the ground.

With what I just went through, I stayed there, trying not to hyperventilate as I breathed in and out spastically.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," a voice said quickly. I felt a hand on my wrist and shock flew into my body making my eyes fly straight towards the man kneeling beside me, both of us going into shock.

**DPOV**

I really didn't want to do this.

It was a simple fact; I didn't want to fly towards America to attend a memorial for my love. The pain would be too much if I had to look at her family members, her friends, her _pictures. _It would be a living hell.

I got the call a month ago from Christian explaining their plans on a memorial for Rose. First they were going to showcase her pictures and pictures of her in an art show in memory. Then, close friends and relatives would gather at their house to relive memories of her.

I didn't want to.

I wanted to think of her beside me, alive, healthy…basically I didn't want to mourn. I kept her picture with me always, the one I took from her album all those months ago. I never let go of it, because if I did, then it would mean letting go of Rose for good.

But I wasn't the only one in this stage, Lissa, Christian, Mia, Eddie, Adrian, Sydney, Janine, and Abe were mourning their friend and daughter and I wouldn't be right if I didn't go. It would be selfish and if Rose was here she would think so too.

I had been running my studio for the last couple of months, leaving it open night and day for seven days just because it kept my mind away from the pain. I taught students during the day, and helped others who came by at night, but some nights, when there wasn't anyone there, I would take my frustration and pain out on the fake dummies and punching bags.

It was like living in a horrid nightmare only it was real life.

I visited Mama and Babushka and my sisters sometimes, Sonya, in memory of Rose, though she never really knew her, named her daughter Roza. When I asked why she did it, she told me, "Because for someone to cause my brother this much pain must be the most perfect girl in the world and it seemed right to keep her name alive and in the family."

She would have loved Rose.

My whole family would have loved Rose, but they would never get to meet her. Never.

After receiving the call from Christian, it took me a while, but I finally decided to travel to the states. I remember my family sending me off at the airport and what my grandmother told me.

"Be wise my grandson, don't try to push away the dark, it will come when it feels right…when it feels at home and at peace." Of course I didn't understand what she meant, but I could only smile and nod at her.

Currently, I was in the back of a cab. It took me a while to find one so I was running a bit late. It was already 9 p.m. and jet lag was eating me alive seeing as in Russia I would already be sleeping by now.

"We are here sir," I looked up from-of course-the picture of Rose and towards the large house before me. Sighing, I tucked the picture in my pocket and opened the door, handing the cab driver the right amount of money before he drove off and I turned around.

Walking up the long drive, I saw about 15 cars sitting in the driveway. I knew there would be a huge crowd and I wasn't expecting to know but half of them.

Lugging the large bag up the steps, I thought about the last time I was doing this, though the last time I was at Rose's house and she was falling off a ladder while painting. I smiled sadly at the thought.

I got up the door and decided not to not since I was family, and opened the door just as someone reached it and I heard them grunt and fall to the ground. I cursed and put my bag down quickly opening the door wider.

"Oh I'm so sorry," I told her, slightly freezing at the color of her hair. It looked so much like Rose's….

She looked like she was hyperventilating and I bent down to her level touching her wrist softly. A shock ran through my body and we both flinched back. In an instant, her eyes met mine and I went into shock.

It couldn't be…

It wasn't possible…

It's a trick; I'm dreaming, wake up!

All of these ran through my head as I stared at her in wonder. What was going on am I seeing ghosts now?

"You-you-"she stuttered, her angelic voice breaking through my scared haze of thoughts. Without thinking, I reached towards her and touched her again, and I slowly felt the same shock run through my body.

It was real; her skin was soft but rugged with scars running across her arms and legs. A long scar ran down the side of her face, and I knew how she had gotten it, I was there.

"Am I dreaming?" I whispered, gripping her wrist more. She just stared at me in shock and wonder. I continued to stare at her before she blinked and reached her hand forward to touch my face.

"No, but I remember you, you were in a dream of mine," she replied, her voice shaking.

"Dimitri," I couldn't take my eyes off her. I continued to stare until someone kneeled down beside Rose and took my gaze away from her.

It was Janine.

"Mrs. Hathaway," I whispered, my eyes misting over.

"Dimitri, we need to explain this to you. Yes, she is alive, they found her."

_They found her._

_They FOUND her._

_Oh my god, they found her._

"Rose."

**Oh. My. god. They met again! Yes! I wanted them to for a very long time. Tell me what you thought of them meeting and what you though about Janine and Abe's reaction. Please review and I will hopefully update soon! Thanks!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Hey everyone! Thanks for all of the reviews last chapter! I couldn't stop typing this last night but I must say I cheated by adding a flashback that was a page and a half long :} Anyways I hope you like the chapter and ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

He was the one from my dream; the one with the melted, brown eyes that was sitting beside me on the bed.

It came clearly now, like the shadows that encased his body were slowly drifting away. Like then, his eyes mesmerized me as if I wanted to be folded inside his large, strong arms and rested my head on his muscled shirt.

However, this never happened.

What happened was that he ended up sitting on a couch in the middle of the living room while I stood in the middle of the room staring at him. His eyes never left mine either, besides when he got shocked by something Lissa or Doreene said, but then he would just find mine again with joy or sadness or hope.

"That sick bastard!" He exclaimed once Doreene came to the part where we stopped last time. I couldn't say it then nor could I say it now, but this time I didn't get the urge to run from the room. Dimitri, his name that I heard about so often, let the thoughts click in his head about what happened.

"But Dimitri," Lissa interrupted seeing the strong urge of longing appear in eyes. For what, I didn't know. "She doesn't remember it happening."

The longing in Dimitri eyes faded but never entirely went away as fury entrapped his features once more.

"I can't-no, forget that, I _can _believe Nathan would do that. He's a disgusting bastard that has taken everything away from her and-"

"Is torturing me every second of the day because I can't remember what he has done to me? Has took me away from family and friends that I don't…even…remember? I can tell you everything that is hitting me right now you don't have to discuss as if I really am dead." I stated, choking on tears as my anger got the better of me.

I didn't mean to snap at him, and immediately felt bad when his eyes turned pained at what I said last. Frowning, I took a step forward instantly to comfort him but stopped.

He noticed this but didn't say anything about it. He stood up, not moving any closer before saying, "I'm sorry Roz- Rose, and it's just hard for me to take all of this in. I-"he stopped, not having the words to continue.

"I'm sorry for snapping," I told him before looking down at the floor, "I need to use the restroom, Lissa could you…"

"Third door on the left on the second floor," she told me immediately. I nodded and walked out of the room and towards the large staircase. Once I found the bathroom, I locked the door and sat down on the side of the large tub inside.

Trying to breathe was hard, I placed my head between my knees, but it didn't help a lot. I looked up, staring at the gold trimmings of the room before catching a glance of a large body mirror on the wall to the left.

I stood up and slowly walked over staring at myself for a very long time. I traced over the scar on my face and then continued to another one that started at my shoulder and made a small curve around my arm. I continued down the arm and rub my thumb over the ring around my wrists from where, the doctors said, rope burned through my skin from being wrapped around my wrists tightly.

They marks were on both wrists, and then small scar scattered around my other arm, all noticeable but easily forgettable. Leaning down, I lifted my red dress up and over my head letting it fall to the floor like a waterfall.

I looked at the mark that started from the bottom of my breast and down towards my waist. A simple mark was on my stomach where the doctors said that a knife was stabbed through and then left there.

All over my legs were scratching and the same marks on my wrists were on my ankles. I closed my eyes to get away from my beaten body but it stayed etched in my head.

I've always wished, since I woke up in the hospital, that I could remember what happened to me. I wished that I could remember if I had friends or family, but now that I see them and now that I know most of what happened to me, I didn't want to.

I wanted to go back to Oregon, I wanted to eat dinner with my boys and help Doreene wash dinner afterwards and the talk to John as he got up early the next morning.

"Rose?" A voice called softly from the door. I looked up, staring at the plain white door that had a blurry edge to it. Wiping my eyes, I felt the wet texture of tears as they fell down my cheeks.

"Who is it?" I croaked, clearing my throat say the lump in my throat would go away.

"It's Dimitri, can I come in?"

The lump in my throat returned, and I crawled my way over to the door and unlatched it before moving back for him to come in.

I knew I should have covered myself before he came in, but he gave no show of looking at my unmentionables because he was quick to look into my eyes.

I looked away before he could and stared at the bright, red dress lying on the ground. Out of my peripheral, I saw him take a couple more steps inside before closing the door shut.

"Are you okay?" He asked, kneeling beside me. I snorted in response and he sighed before saying, "stupid question."

"Yeah," I muttered, biting my lip.

"Is that a 'yeah' to if you okay, or is that a 'yeah' that was a stupid question?" He asked with a hint of amusement.

"A little of both," I replied, the ghost of amusement lighting up inside me.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked, resting his back on the cabinet behind him. I stared at him, trying to see what his motive was. He knows that I don't remember him, but he is sitting here ready to listen.

I could still remember the way his eyes shot through my core and how is touch render me speechless, but it didn't help that those didn't help me remember who he was, or why he was so easy to talk to now.

"I'm confused," I finally admitted. His eyebrows lowered as if he himself was experiencing confusion.

"So am I," he replied, pulling his knees up so he was almost in the same position as me, "but what for?"

"I honestly don't know what's going on. I wanted this, for so long, to meet my family and see my friends again, but not under these circumstances, not when I don't remember them and not when they hope that I would. I don't know what to think or what to do and everything is just hitting me all at once." I told him, shaking my head. He thought about it and I saw his finger twitch as if he was going to move it towards me.

"I understand, maybe not fully, but I guess I'm in the middle of wondering if this is real or another dream." He told me, sighing. I stared at him, wondering how it was like that we were in the same position.

"Me too," I breathed.

I met his eyes and he smiled weakly at me, "I just can't believe you are actually here." I broke contact with him immediately.

"Are you mad?"

"Mad?" He asked surprised, "what for?"

"Because I can't remember you or anyone else?" I told him, lowering my head in shame. I felt warmth linger on my chin as his finger tilted my face back up.

"No Rose, I'm not mad at you, no one is. Nathan is the cause of all of this, not you. I'm mad at myself if anything." He said, shaking his head in remorse.

"Yourself?" I asked surprised.

"I was the reason why you left the house that night. You were looking for me when a van pulled up and grabbed you. I tried to run towards you as fast as I could, but it was gone and I was left with no clues or help." He said, hiding his face from me. I reached over and touched his hand, and before I realized it, I was staring at him differently.

_ "What do you mean your quitting, Rose; photography is your passion, something that you have done since you were little. Why would you want to give it up?' _

_"I don't fit with me anymore Dimitri, as you probably heard. "_

_"That's bull Rose and you know it," he stated, eyeing me critically. I bit my bottom lip and looked away._

_"It's the truth," I muttered loudly so that he could hear me. He sighed and walked closer to me, I could feel his eyes boring holes into the side of my face. Soon enough he grabbed my hand and pulled me down the hallway and then into my room. He sat me down on the bed and then started searching through my stuff. "What are you doing?" I exclaimed._

_"Searching…here it is," he murmured, pulling out my camera that I had under some clothes in my drawer. I eyed the device warily, watching as he brought it closer and then placed it in my hands. The cold metal, smooth over my fingertips, was placed into my hands perfectly, giving me control of any memory that came across my path._

_I swallowed down the lump in my throat before dropping the camera onto the bed beside me. I didn't look up at Dimitri, but I could see his tense figure out of the corner of my eye. He reached over and placed the camera back in my hands, holding my wrists in place so that I wouldn't put the camera back again._

_"I might not have known you for a long time like all of your friends Rose," Dimitri whispered, kneeling in front of me, "but I know that you love photography and that if you could you would be behind the camera every single minute of every hour of every single day. When you have the camera in front of your eyes, you make people wonder what is behind it, who is hidden from them, what secrets are held within them and what they are thinking when they press their finger down and capture another moment in time._

_"With every click that I hear from that camera, I wonder what exactly is going through your head. I want to know the secrets hidden with it, and every time I hear that small noise, I see joy lit up your features, This is something that you enjoy Rose, don't give it up because you think that you don't deserve this joy anymore, because you think that it isn't fair that you can be happy but Mason can't." I gasped but continued looking at the ground. _

_"I know you Rose, I know what you're thinking, and you have captured my mind since I first met you, but you cannot think that giving up your joy will make Mason happy, I think it will be the exact opposite. He would hate that you were doing this," he stated, shaking my hands. I flexed my fingers around the camera once more._

_"I can't Dimitri, you don't understand," I whispered, tears pooling in my eyes._

_"Yes I do, when I was little I absolutely adored my father, he was my role model. He was the one that owned the combat building that I now own. He taught me every day about new combat moves and wanted to be just like him when I grew up." He sucked in a deep breath, his voice shaking slightly. _

_"Over the years I started seeing a change in him, something vile that starting sneaking into his eyes. Soon he never had time to teach me, but I always went to building so that I could work on my moves myself. I mostly taught myself everything I knew. _

_"When I was thirteen, my father had crossed the line. He wasn't the nice, happy dad that taught me combat, he was the cruel, selfish, father that ruined my life. I came home from school and heard yelling and things being broken from inside. I ran in and saw my dad hitting and kicking my mom with my little sister Viktoria sobbing violently. She barely five at the time, and it was horrible for her to see what her own father was doing._

_"I got Viktoria to move under the kitchen table and wait for me to come and get her while I went back into the living room and walked straight up to my father and socked him in the face." He had a look of grim satisfaction on his face as I absorbed all of this information that Dimitri was telling me._

_"I was already taller than him, stronger than him, and I continued beating the living shit out of him until my mom pulled me off of him. My father was enough alive to crawl out the front door while I slammed the front door in his face and I never saw him again." He stopped, and I saw the anger hidden in his eyes. I placed a comforting hand on his arm, but I realized that he wasn't done yet._

_"I stopped doing combat, I stopped going to the gym and I locked up my father's combat place. It was my passion, to fight, to be in control, but after I learned so much from my father I didn't think that I should continue it. It was the worst mistake of my life. _

_"I was with my best friend Ivan; we were going out to party for the New Year. We had been there long when Ivan had gotten mad when he saw his girlfriend kissing another guy. We were around eighteen at the time, and I had almost forgotten everything that I have known about fighting or any type of combat." This time a look of pain fell over his face. I gripped his hand in mine tightly, not worried that he had been yelling at me five minutes before._

_"I was chasing after him, and it was already dark. He went through a dark alley, a short-cut that we used daily. I saw a man come out from behind some trashcans and he started attacking us. If I would have kept up my combat training I probably would have beaten the man without a struggle, but he managed to beat both Ivan and I up pretty good. He had a knife and he had cut me several times, though I only have one scar," he said, tracing a line that I couldn't see over his stomach. I gasped, horrified at Dimitri getting hurt this bad._

_"I was unconscious immediately, and when I woke up, Ivan was dead. He died from internal bleeding, something that I managed to avoid. He was beat up really good and I felt that it was my fault that he was dead." This time his eyes really did water and he wiped away the tears feverishly._

_ "I started training again immediately, thinking that I shouldn't have ever stopped, because it could hurt me in the future and I would regret it, and I did," he whispered, turning to face me. I touched his face and rubbed my thumb across the stubble settling there._

_"I'm sorry Dimitri, I'm so sorry," I whispered, wiping a stray tear away. He squeezed the hand that I still held in my grasp in thanks and I reached up and kissed his cheek. "Photography though isn't going to be live and death, I'll survive without it," I told him, my breath fanning across his cheek. He shook his head and pulled out of my grasp._

_"You will regret it though Rose, you have to know that," he told me. When I gave him no response he put the camera back in my hands and kissed my forehead as he stood up. "Just think about what I said Rose," he whispered as he walked out of the room._

"You were trying to convince not to quit photography." I whispered, looking up at him. He seemed shocked, and stared at me. "You told me about Ivan and-"I didn't have the heart to continue.

"H-How did you remember that?" He asked, tightening his hold on my hands making me realize they were in his hold.

"It happens sometimes, there's no rhyme or reason it comes if it wants to. I've never remembered so much before though, you opened yourself to me, you cared about me, and I should have listened…"

"I did care about you Rose, a lot more than I realized at the time." I looked down at our hands and wondered what would have happened if I wasn't taken.

"How did we meet?" I asked him, peeking up at him through my lashes.

"I don't think I should push these memories into you Rose, you need to remember on your own." I grimaced and looked away.

"And what if I don't?" I whispered, looking at us through the mirror.

"There are a lot of people in the living room right now, who are willing to help you through this. If you never remember, than that's just more room to make more memories in isn't it? I know that you don't know me as well as you did before, but if you let me, I would like to help you." I looked at him fiercely trying to remember him and to figure out how nice he is to me.

"I would like that very much Dimitri, and thank you for talking to me." I whispered, squeezing his hand.

"I'm just glad that I got a second chance," he replied.

"With what?"

"You."

I blushed and looked away from his eyes. Looking back at myself in the mirror, I found strength that hadn't been there before that said everything will be okay…in time. And maybe Dimitri can just help me do that.

**DPOV**

She was still just as beautiful as she blushed, and I had the urge to brush my fingers lightly over her cheeks. I knew I must have thought this over a 100 times, but it was still so hard to believe. After all these months, she was really here.

At first, I thought I was seeing a ghost, like she was here to see everyone mourn her, but once I touched her, felt her warm skin against mine, I knew she was real.

I was given a second chance.

It didn't matter that she didn't remember me, it was better than what I thought had happened the months she was d- missing. I never should have given up, that is what Babushka was angry at me for, that I gave up on Roza before she could be found.

While I gave up, she was in the middle of dying in a field where Doreene's husband was lucky to find her. I really had almost lost her, and I was only glad that she was here with me now.

She stood up, bringing me with her because I was still holding her hands. She smiled at me and I wanted to wrap her up in my arms badly. Did she feel the wire connecting me to her?

"I guess everyone will be missing us by now." She said, unwrapping her hands from mine. I instantly missed the contact but didn't protest.

"Ladies first," I said, waving her forward. She opened the bathroom door and exited before me, leaving me to walk behind her.

"Rose, there you are, we were just leaving," Doreene said to Rose. "Did you want to come, or…" Rose looked conflicted as she looked at the others on the living room and then at me. I smiled and gave her a nod saying it was for whatever she wanted to do.

"I could show you to your house Rose, maybe being somewhere familiar would help…?" I offered, putting another option out there. She bit her lip before pulling Jeremiah and Doreene down the hall.

"How did it go?" Lissa asked walking up to me. I ran my fingers through my hair and smiled.

"I told her that whatever happened , we would be there for her, whether she remembered or she didn't. But I still can't believe-"

"That she's really here? I can't either," she whispered smiling.

"It's like a dream," Mia said, snuggling in Eddie's side.

"A very, very good dream," Adrian added grinning.

"I'm worried though," Sydney whispered, making us look in her direction. She looked up at us with wide eyes but kept her body hidden in Adrian's embrace. "What if she remembers? That will leave her traumatized."

"We will help her through it then, with whatever it takes." I told them, sitting down on the couch.

"My poor, baby girl," Janine sighed, staring at the doorway where Rose had walked out of.

"I thought I would never see her again, Nathan had the power to kill her, he threatened me about killing her and I would watch, but he was a weak man and I'm glad Rose was strong enough to survive," Abe said, closing his eyes.

We stayed in silence after that, waiting to see if Rose would stay or go. She came in about five minutes later with no sign of Doreene or Jeremiah.

"I would like to go home," she whispered, looking at everyone before meeting my eyes. I smiled and nodded, standing up to join her at the door. Lissa moved with me and took Rose's hand.

"Will you come back tomorrow?" She asked hopefully.

"How else will I get my memories back?" She said, giving a slight smirk. Lissa said bye, along with all of the others before I ushered her out of the door and towards the driveway.

"Um," I realized that I didn't have a vehicle but the second I turned around, Christian was walking towards us with a set of car keys in his hand.

"Make sure you return it," he said smirking before handing me the keys. I thanked him before moving Rose towards their garage and into Christian's black pickup.

"Thank you for doing this Dimitri," she whispered as we drove through the pitch black. I looked over at her and nodded.

"Anytime Rose," I said before turning my eyes back on the road.

"Do you think," she paused, making me look at her.

"Do I think what?"

"Do you think maybe you could stay at my house tonight? Or is it big enough? I don't remember, I just don't think I can stay by myself when I don't know where anything is, or what if somebody come by and-"

"Yes Rose your house in big enough and I would love to stay at your house, I wouldn't have let you stay by yourself anyways, I would feel guilty for just leaving you there by yourself especially since you don't remember anyone's numbers or anything," I said, feeling myself rambling.

"Thank you…again," she repeated.

"Like I said before, if you need anything, I'll be right there."

The rest of the car ride was in silence, but from the passenger side, Rose smiled letting me know that maybe she was warming up to me again….maybe.

"We're here," I said, pointing to her house as I parked in the driveway. It was exactly like I left it, her parents had been keeping care of it for her, even when they thought she was gone.

"This is my house?" She asked, looking at the small, two-bedroom house. I got out and walked around to her side, opening the door quickly.

"Welcome home Rose," she seemed to unfreeze at my words and grabbed my outstretched hand to help her out.

I walked beside her inside, finding the key in the plant by her door and pushing it open easily. She breathed in as she looked at her house and she looked like she was taking it all in.

"Here is the living room, kitchen, guest bedroom, bathroom, and here is your room," I explained, touring her through the house. She paused at her door before gesturing to it shyly. I waved my hand for her to go in and she cautiously opened the door.

The room was the same, and I looked at the bed, a memory resurfacing of when I laid in her bed crying for her. I felt my heart break slightly, but when I looked back at her, it healed itself up just as quick.

"I'll leave you to your things, if you need me I'll be in the guest bedroom," I told her, closing the door behind me when she continued to gaze at her things in amazement. Sighing, I walked back to the guestroom and pulled out the picture of Rose before placing it on the dresser and knowing that I didn't need to hold it anymore, I was perfectly fine with keeping it close but away.

If this was real, and I wasn't dreaming, then I didn't need a picture to get me through my days anymore. I was going to help through the big mess Nathan made, this big trick he pulled on us, and I knew in the future Rose would be just fine.

And I wouldn't let anything hurt her ever again.

This was my second chance, and I wasn't going to give up again.

**Sooo? Did I catch their reactions close enough? Please review and tell me what you think? I wrote the scene in the bathroom five times before thinking this was the best way :p haha anyways thanks and Review!**


	29. Chapter 29

**Hellooo everyone! Sorry it took so long to update but i've been really busy! Please ENJOY this chapter!**

**R****POV**

It was silent as I looked around my room. I recognized it from the memory I had of Dimitri earlier. I picked up a picture sitting on the dresser and rubbed my finger over the face of me, Lissa, and Mia. We were all smiling happily and I closed my eyes, trying to get a sense of where we were.

Sighing, I gave up and placed the picture back down before moving over to the bookcase. I fingered through the books, smiling as I read over the titles of most of them. _Photography for Dummies, What to do to Become a Photographer, Finding the Perfect Shot, Alisa Benet- Famous Photographer, _many of them had to do with the same topic.

A small box laid on one of the shelves and I picked it up, turning over and hearing a _thump_ as something rolled around inside of it. I lifted the lid and looked at the tiny camera sitting inside. It looked very familiar, which was rare, and when I tried to remember where I recognized, I touched it and the vision of the woman from my recent dreams showed up.

Excited, I picked up the camera and glanced inside, disappointed that no name was written inside to tell me the name of the women that gave it to me. I put the camera back up and stood, stretching my legs out. I glanced at the clock and was shocked to see that it was 1 in the morning.

I wasn't tired, however, and continued exploring my room. One thing I noticed was a large photo album sitting on the bottom shelf of the book case.

I grabbed it and sat down on my bed, sifting through the pictures one by one. Each one was unique and grabbed my attention instantly. The first part of the album had photos of me and others but as I got older, the pictures in there started becoming less and less of me. Many pictures had my friends, others had scenery outside, and then a couple was of a bird.

I didn't know what the bird stood for, so I stared at it for a long time. Once I reached the end of the book, I closed it tiredly and looked at the clock. It was now 5 in the morning.

I got up, my muscles groaning in protest, and put the album back up before leaving my room as quietly as I could. Dimitri was sleeping in his room still.

Well, that's what I thought. When I entered the kitchen, he was sitting down on a chair by the table, drinking a cup of coffee. My nose scrunched up in distaste as I walked up to him.

Dimitri looked up at me surprised, and seeing my obvious dislike of his coffee, he smiled and stood up, heading towards the cabinet and searching for something. He finally took out two packages of hot chocolate and started making some.

"How did you know I liked hot chocolate?" I asked him, sitting down. He smiled amused and grabbed his coffee, taking a drink before setting it back down.

"I was staying at your house for a couple weeks before Christian and Lissa's wedding, and the first morning your came into the kitchen and when I asked if you wanted coffee you gave a snort of distaste and said you only drink hot chocolate. It just so happened, however, that I made the best hot chocolate and made you some." He told me smiling. Amused, I leaned forward and gave him an exasperated look.

"Do you always talk highly about yourself?"

"Do you always have to speak sarcastically?"

"Touché," I stated smirking. He laughed and grabbed my now made hot chocolate.

"So is there a reason that you are up so early?" He asked, sitting back in his chair across from me. I looked down at my mug and rubbed my finger around the top.

"Couldn't sleep," I murmured sighing.

"Me either."

I looked up at him and before I could stop myself I blurted out, "thank you."

"For what?"

"Being here, having hope, helping me through this." I said, noting all of my thoughts.

"There isn't another place I rather be." Dimitri said smiling softly, "but there is another reason that I am up so early. I was going to go for a run."

I looked at him through my eyelashes, worried that he was going to leave me here by myself. It wasn't that I couldn't handle myself, but I couldn't hide the mental breakdown if one happened again.

"Would you like to join me? It's good to run sometimes, and I like to think when I run." He said looked at me softly, knowing what was on my mind. I breathed out relieved and nodded my head quickly. He motioned for the go get ready and I downed my hot chocolate and jogged to my room.

I searched through my drawers, trying to find shorts and a tank top. I was successful 10 minutes later. Meeting Dimitri outside, he taught me some warm-up stretches, pulling the arm back and forth, and bend over to stretch the legs.

"You ready?" He asked, walking towards the sidewalk. It was still slightly dark, but light was starting to cut through the sky and soon the sun would be up and burning me.

I nodded at him, and started jogging beside him. He looked like he could go faster, but slowed down to meet my pace, which I was thankful for.

He took me down twists, and turns that I couldn't remember, and was glad that he was with me because I wouldn't remember how to get home. My breathing was hoarse and ragged while his was calm and controlled, which made me a little embarrassed.

When I saw my house start to come into view, I looked at Dimitri and smirked before sprinting ahead quickly. I heard his quick pursuit and in seconds, he was ahead of me. I huffed and picked up my speed only to quickly drop it as I tripped to a stop.

I was on the edge of the sidewalk, closet to the road when I heard the roar of an engine behind me. Images raced inside my mind and I froze in terror. The sky was still dark, and headlights were framing Dimitri's still running body seeing as how he didn't hear me stop.

My heart was pounding in my ears and I was breathing hard from my exertion and fear. I heard the vehicle slow down and closed my eyes, feeling my muscles lock and shake.

The vehicle, slowed down more and I was about to pass out from fear when I heard Dimitri's voice call my name. My legs gave out and dropped to my knees and then to my side, gasping for air. A car door slammed shut and I let out a piercing scream, trying to move as far from the van as possible.

I could see the man with the black mask moving closer and closer before I felt something hit my head, but I didn't feel the pain that accompanied it. The fog was getting thicker, deeper….

"Rose! You're okay, you're okay, and no one is going to hurt you. Your fine, I'm here, the car is gone, and you're safe." Dimitri's voice pierced through my hazy mind and I realized that I was still screaming and thrashing on the ground. Stopping myself mid-scream, my body arched forward and collided with a hard surface.

Breathing deeply, I opened my eyes and looked up at Dimitri, the light from the sky showing his good-looking features and worry.

It also showed the huge, red mark on his forehead where I head-butted him. I couldn't find the words to apologize because once I opened my mouth sobs escaped and wracked my body harshly. Dimitri picked me up and sat me in his lap, soothing me with words that I didn't know as he rubbed his head through my hair.

"I was there, the car stopped, someone grabbed me, the fog…my head…I'm so scared." My words were a mixed jumble through my sobs and I gripped Dimitri's shirt in my hands.

"I know, I know, don't worry, it won't happen again Rose, your safe with me here, Nathan won't be coming for you again." He whispered in my ear. I breathed in and out slowly, stifling my sobs. When we were both breathing evenly, I pulled my head from his chest and looked up at him.

He looked down at me at the same time and we just looked the other in the eye. I could see the pain in his eyes and wanted it to go away. He sighed, his breath fanning across my face.

"How about we go inside and clean up," he suggested, standing up with me still in his arms. I didn't protest and instead laid my head on his chest, closing my eyes.

"It was that bad?" I whispered, tears brimming at my eyes.

"Yes, I'm sorry you had to remember that," he said back just as softly. I breathed out shakily and tightened my grip on him.

We said no more, and soon I was being set down inside of my room and he was shutting the door behind him, sending me one more remorseful glance.

I walked towards the dresser and pulled out clothes to change into after my shower. I walked towards the bathroom and took a quick shower, still trying to push the images of my kidnapping out of my mind. Once I was cleaned off and mentally stable, I walked into the kitchen and then living room, searching for Dimitri.

He was sitting in a chair, gazing forward, his eyes glazed over. I know he didn't see me walk in and when I kneeled in front of him, I grabbed his hand, shocking him out of his thoughts.

"Sorry, I didn't hear you come in," he said softly.

"I know, what were you thinking about?" I asked him.

"Everything that has happened," he replied generally. I grimaced and tugged his hand so that he would stand up.

"Let's go to Lissa's house, they should be awake now," I stated, walking outside as I held his hand.

"Sounds good," he replied, opening my door for me. I got in and watched him moved around the car before taking his place in the driver's seat. I stared at him as we took off, my mind traveling fast and furiously.

I grabbed hold of his hand again and he gave me a smile and squeezed it gently. I melted into the gesture, continuing to stare at him when he looked away.

It was crazy that it felt so right to hold his hand and hug him close. I _couldn't _remember him for the life of me, but somewhere, my mind and my body responded to him as if I did. I didn't know him, but I knew that I did.

Man, did that sound crazy or what?

He wasn't going to be going anywhere anytime soon, and I felt like he was the key to remembering everything. What did Doreene say again?

_You know, maybe your amnesia has something to do with what happened to you. Your brain might me holding your memories back from you because you don't feel safe yet. _Will Dimitri help me feel safe again? Do I still feel scared?

I could answer the second answer quickly. Yes, I was still scared, the panic attack I had not half an hour again could confirm that. I shivered, remembering what happened, and from the corner of my eye I saw Dimitri glance at me.

It was as if I transported to the past and was living through the kidnapping again. I saw fog, darkness, the masked man, and heard the car following me, but it wasn't real. It was sparked from a car driving by, and they didn't stop, Dimitri said they were gone.

Is this going to keep happening? Every time I hear, smell, feel, or see something, will it trigger another episode? I sure hope not, because it never happened before I came here, and it sure as hell won't keep happening while I am here.

We pulled up in front of Lissa's house and sat in silence for a few seconds before I squeezed Dimitri's hand and got out of the truck. He did the same and pulled me into his side while we walked. I appreciated it, resting my head on his chest.

"Please don't tell them about what happened." I said, looking up at him pleadingly. His eyes scrunched together and gave me a look of confusion. I stared at him harder to get my point across but recognition lit his eyes and he pulled me to a stop.

"Rose, they won't think that you're weak because you let your memories consume you." He replied giving me the _are-you-stupid-thinking-they-will-judge-you _look.

"But it is weak that small things, like running on a sidewalk when a car passes me, turn me into a screaming mess! I don't want them knowing that!" I exclaimed, gripping his shoulder. He gave a long look, but finally nodded in consent.

"Fine, but just remember that they won't judge you, especially with what you are going through right now Rose." I nodded, looking away so we could drop the subject. He sighed and started walking again, keeping his arm around me.

"Rose! Dimitri! I'm glad that your back!" Lissa exclaimed, giving me a light hug that I appreciated because I didn't want any of them treating me any different. Maybe it will even help me remember some things about how it used to be.

"Hi Liss," I replied, smiling. She beamed at her nickname and pulled me towards the kitchen where Christian was standing over a stove flipping pancakes.

"Do you still have that big appetite Rosie? Cause I made a lot of food," he said, grinning as he tried to flip a pancakes high up in the air. I noticed how he called me Rosie, instead of Rose, and I felt a flare of annoyance from somewhere inside of me.

"Didn't I tell you not to call me Rosie?" I snapped, before gasping and covering my mouth with my hand. I didn't mean to say it, at all. I was shocked that it came out of my mouth as did everyone else.

Christian looked a Lissa and a smile captured his lips. "You have, but I still called you because it annoyed you," he replied before glancing at me cautiously, "did you just say that without thinking?"

"Yeah, I felt a flash of annoyance and then the words just blurted from my mouth. Tell me, what kind of relationship did we have?" I asked confused.

"You can say that we had a love-hate relationship…though it's mostly a hate because you were Lissa's best friend so I had to put up with you every day," he was amused by his words as if he was remembering the past.

"We were that bad?" I asked.

"Yes," several people stated making me jump. Lissa had said it but all the others had come down the stairs and echoed her also.

I gave Christian a look before turning my back on him in surprise and walking to an empty seat. Mia sat in one beside me and touched my hand softly.

"Did you sleep well?"

I gave her sheepish look and shook my head. "I stayed up all night looking through some photo album on my bookcase." Everyone looked at each other and I froze fleetingly, "what?"

"Rose, that album was very…sacred by you. You never let anyone see what was inside of it because you told us that you had personal things inside of it." Lissa said her eyes turning guilty once she was done talking.

"I'm guessing it wasn't kept secret for long?" I said, looking around the guilty eyes of the room. Even Dimitri looked away from me.

"Rose, after the first attack, and after losing Mason…" Lissa said trailing off.

"Losing Mason? Who's Mason?" The only one that gave any sign of replying was Dimitri as he put his arm around me in a comforting manner.

"Mason…Rose, I think maybe you should remember this yourself-"

"I don't give a shit about remembering this myself! Who is Mason?" I shouted, jumping up and standing in front of all of them.

"Rose…"

"Tell me Dimitri." I growled, staring at him.

The room was silent and I heard a choked noise sound from the back where Eddie was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. I stared at him and felt my legs move towards him unconsciously.

"Eddie, please tell me," I whispered, hoping to get a response out of him.

"Rose, stop it, you will remember this on your own," Dimitri said again.

"No, she has the right to know," Eddie stated, opening his eyes, "if we don't tell her now, she will hate us for not telling her when she remembers."

I looked at him expectantly as he tried to get his thoughts together and I could see the pain and longing come into his eyes. "Mason was your best friend since you were little," I glanced at Lissa but she shook her head.

"I only knew you since college Rose," I nodded and looked back Eddie to continue.

"When you graduated high school, he made the decision to admit himself into the army." He whispered, shaking his head, "you always said he would play soldier when you both were little and that he always wanted to be one. We all met during college, and Mason got leave for Christmas so he came by to see you and met all of us.

We all became close and talked often, Lissa and Christian told him about the wedding and he asked for leave as soon as possible. He showed up at your house and we all got together…" he breathed in deeply while I stayed entranced with his story.

"A couple of nights later, you came back from work pale and worried saying you had to go do something and you would be back soon. Dimitri and Mason followed you from your house," I glanced at Dimitri and he looked down, "and we found you making a deal with the devil." I flinched with the way he worded it, but I don't think he saw it because he continued on.

"Dimitri and Mason saw them drag you into the woods, and they quickly followed. They found you and Dimitri quickly took you back to the car, but Mason stayed to fight the men that took you and ended up…getting hurt badly." Eddie took another breather while I sat there wondering what the hell I had done.

"He got put in the hospital and he was stable, you and Lissa visited him once you were awake and on your feet again, and while you were there, the doctor came in saying that he forgot to give Mason his medicine…he didn't forget, however, someone lied to him, telling him that he needed to give Mason this medicine. It killed him instantly."

I didn't think Eddie could go on, and I leaned on the wall heavily, my hands shaking as I breathed in and out. "I killed somebody…I killed my best friend." I whispered, tears watering in my eyes.

"Rose," Dimitri was there in an instant, holding my head between his hands, "you did _not _kill Mason, he was a brave man that fought for the right thing and did what he wanted to do. You didn't kill him, Nathan did."

"But he went in there to get revenge for me, and he ended up dying by perhaps that same person who hurt him, all because of me." I cried, moving off the wall and walking towards the door.

"Rose-"

"I need a minute alone, if you don't mind," I stated before taking the door outside. No one followed though I could hear someone start to protest.

I shouldn't be alive right now; someone I _should _know is dead while I'm standing here alive. It isn't fair, why doesn't it ever stop? How much do I have to go through before my life becomes healthy to live in? So far all I know of is rape, death, kidnapping, and loss, which is by far not a healthy way to live.

I'm going to regret wanting my memories back, I know I am now, because I don't want to know what happened to me, I don't want to remember the pain that I went through because I could have dealt with it while I went through life, but when I remember it will all hit me at once.

I won't be able to stand it.

I could go back to Oregon, live a normal life without remembering them. The people that make up my old life, it would be easy.

But I didn't feel the urge to get on a plane and fly away from the answers that lie here. I found the connection to my old life, to people that love me and care for me, and if I know one thing about myself, is that I rather be in pain, then someone else.

No one else needs to feel this pain but me. But if I want to get through this as fast as I can, I have to face what I'm scared to think about, and I know that everyone inside that house knows how to give me what I want.

I need to see this Nathan and figure out what happened to me and why the hell he did this.

Then maybe…maybe I can live in peace.

Maybe.

**So did you like it? I hope so:) Review and tell me what you think!**


	30. Chapter 30

**Yes I know I haven't updated in a while! I'm so sorry! And I know this won't be the best chapter, but I promise I will put some action into it for you! But this is just a filler..kind of...ENJOY!**

**RPOV**

"No! Absolutely not!" Abe, my father, said with astonished anger. I had just told him my thoughts about meeting the infamous rapist-_flinch_-slash kidnapping slash demon named Nathan. My mother, Janine, was standing behind him with a strong expression, silently repeating the words my dad had just said.

Dimitri stood to the side of my dad, giving the same reaction. Actually, it seemed everyone was against my idea of going to the jail and meeting him.

"He won't harm me, he's locked in a jail cell, and if I ask someone, I'm sure they can even put one of those glass windows in front of me so he won't touch me." I replied, throwing in suggestions so I could reassure him and everyone else.

"I'm not worried about him harming you physically…maybe just a little… but my main fear is that he will harm you mentally. He can say things that can get inside of your head." He stated distinctly so I he could get his point across.

"I'll be fine," I told him, looking up at him through soft eyes. He looked at my mom and she knowingly put her arm around his waist.

"I know what he can do, how fast your resolve can break. Its pushes you down without physical contact and keeps you wounded on the floor. I don't want that to happen to you, especially when you don't remember him and all of the vile things he said and done to you." His breathing shuddered and he looked away tearfully.

Others in the room looked away with sadness except for Lissa who was staring at me as if she was waiting for something to happen. I moved my eyes away from hers and stared at the wall behind her head, looking the phone hung on the wall.

_ "Hathaway," I barked into the receiver._

_"Miss Hathaway, it's a pleasure to hear your voice." A cold voice whispered into the phone. The sound made me flinch, and caused a shiver to snake down my spine._

_"Who is this?" I growled._

_"No need to know my name, you will find out in time." I rolled my eyes and started tapping my heel on the ground._

_"Or I could never know your name and hang up on you now." I replied back harshly._

_"I wouldn't do that Rosemarie, at least on your father's life you shouldn't." I froze, my heel tapping stopped as did my breathing. I was quiet, thinking over his words before whispering softly._

_"My father?" I asked dumbly._

_"You know daddy dearest," I winced at the name. _

_"What are you doing with him?" I growled, tightly holding the phone to my ear, seeing my mother's frantic face from last night in my head. _

_"He had something that I wanted, and he got in my way, so I decided to keep him and hold him to my advantage." His voice crept out humorlessly._

_"Let him go," I whispered menacingly. I looked at my door and hurried to close it, completing isolating myself from the rest of the room._

_"Now where is the fun in that?" I hissed, pulling on my hair._

_"What do you want?" _

_"Do you happen to know where Janine Hathaway resides?" I felt myself pale at his words._

_"Why do you want my mom?" I gulped, feeling myself shaking._

_"Everything Rosemarie, she is the key to all of this, but knowing that you won't tell me where she is…I guess you will be second best. I want you to meet me at Cold Wood Park tonight at 7 p.m. no later. I have some prepositions for you, if you want to see your father again." _

"Y-You were there?" I whispered, gripping the edge of the counter that I was leaning on. Lissa was at my side, holding my elbow as her other arm wrapped around my waist comfortingly.

My dad looked at me, and I could clearly see the pain in his eyes. I left Lissa's arms and ran into his embrace.

"He used you, so I would trade mom for you." I stated, mumbling into his chest. He pulled back and I looked at my mom over his shoulder but found that her hands were covering her face as she cried.

"Shh Janie, it wasn't your fault." Dad said, pulling her close.

"How can you say that, Abe? He kidnapped you, so he could get to me, and guilted my daughter in to get to me, only to have her get kidnapped too!" She sobbed, trying to pull from Abe's arms.

I watched him try to console her as best as he could before looking away and staring at the floor thinking about how screwed up my life was.

"Roza," Dimitri whispered, touching my arm. I looked up at him with watery eyes and all he did was pull me into his arms. I stayed wrapped his embrace, grateful for how normal and easy it was to just stand here like this. It felt easier to breathe and the bad thoughts floated away from me in the time being.

A knock on the front door sounded and Lissa walked out of the room to answer it. I finally pulled away and looked towards the entrance where Doreene and Jeremiah now stood looking around the sad room.

I ran towards her and pulled her into a hug quickly, feeling her squeeze her arms around me tightly. She put her head on my shoulder and whispered in my ear, "I think I've grown attached, I could barely sleep last night because you weren't where I was." I smiled and pulled away kissing her cheek.

Turning towards Jeremiah, I threw my arms around his shoulders and he picked me up off the ground. I was glad, because I need to normality right now.

"I missed you sis," he said pulling back. I also kissed his cheek and turned so I was facing both of them.

"Thank you for coming back, I'm sorry-"

"Nonsense Rose, we know how much you need to be around the familiar surroundings. We are glad that it's getting better for you finally, it's all coming together." Doreene said, smiling, but when I didn't smile back, she looked at me worried.

"It hasn't all been coming together, if anything it's gotten harder. But I think I know what I need, and it would be easier if I others agreed with me." I sighed, looking back at my parents.

"I'm sorry Rose, I just can't," my dad said, shaking his head sadly.

"I can't ask you to come with me, but whether you think its right or wrong, I need to go and deal with these monsters that are holding me back." I look over at the others that were remembered as my friends and begged with my eyes.

"I don't think we can convince her not to go, your strong-headed attitude has always been hard to get through. If we can't stop you, however, I'm going because I won't make you go by yourself." Adrian said, being the first and only one to speak. Everyone stared at him in shock before the each looked at each in recognition and nodded their heads.

They chorused their consent and I looked at Dimitri who was staring at me with a hard expression. I walked over to him, feeling a familiar urge to grab his hand with both of mine and bring it to my mouth in a soft kiss.

I held myself back however and only touched his arm. He pushed it away and stalked out of the room. Hurt, I felt tears float to my eyes as I stared at the spot he had stood in.

"What are you going to do?" Doreene said, pulling me out of my shock and confusion.

"I need to see him, Nathan; I think he is the key to everything." I whispered, not looking back at her.

"That's crazy Rose," Jeremiah stated bluntly.

"It's not, I have to get through this one way or another, and this is the way I have agreed to go, so you are either with me or watching the back of my head as I walk out that door right now." I stated angrily, still not turning around.

When I didn't get an answer, I turned and walked out of the room, hoping Dimitri hadn't left. When I turned the corner though, he was sitting on a bench in front of a piano staring out the window.

"Having you…so close to him…I can't do it Rose. I can't." I barely wondered how he knew I was there because I was thinking about how fast his voice and expression changed to one of sorrow. "I almost lost you to him, and you want to go back." He snorted, standing and throwing his hands up at the same time, strutting towards me quickly.

"Please Dimitri; I don't want to do this without you." I whispered, reaching out to him. His lips quivered and he dropped his head down so his long hair was covering his face.

"I'll go, but I am going to stay by your side the whole time, and if he makes any sudden moves, I am going to beat him to death inside of that police station and hopefully kill him. Arrested or not."

Figuring this was the best I was going to do, I let my reached out hand touched his face and then my other hand before lifting his face up. "Thank you," I breathed, rubbing the tears away from his eyes.

He didn't reply back, all he did was grimace and grab both of my hands in a tight grip. He pulled me towards the kitchen where everyone now sat with a plate of food in front of them.

"Okay, this is how it is going to work. Rose will go talk to him but I will be in the room too. If he lashes out I will immediately send her out of the room and get the cops in there. If any of you have any suggestions, please feel free to tell them to me now." Dimitri ordered, standing protectively over me, just like a bodyguard would if I ever had one.

"I'll be in the room too." Shocked, I looked at Abe wildly. "If I can't- If I can't stop you, then I will be there if anything happens. I won't let him harm you another time, and you will only get 5 minutes unless something happens." He looked me straight in the eye, and I could see how much pain he was in for his consent.

"Okay," I whispered, sending as much comfort as I could through my eyes. He understood and gave me a short nod before he left the room.

"We will leave after breakfast," Dimitri whispered, grabbing my hand, "I'll call the police station so I could warn them ahead of time." And with that said, his phone was placed at his ear as he walked outside.

I walked over and sat in between Doreene and Jeremiah, wanting to feel normal for at least a few minutes. Christian handed me a plate of food and smiled at me before walking off. I thanked him, taking a bite of the bacon, but my hunger had already diminished.

It just hit me that I was going to see my kidnapper in less than an hour. After the fight that I just put up to be able to do this, I started to second-guess myself.

What will happen in there? Will he be surprised, or will he act like he knew I was coming? Will he put up a fight?

So many questions and very little answers.

"Are you sure you want to do this Rose, I mean…this could lead to dangerous consequences." Jeremiah said softly so only I could hear.

"Whether it hurts me or not, I need to know the man that did this me. I need to know the face that goes with the nightmares I have every night." I break out painfully, feeling the lump in my throat grow bigger.

"I can see it in your eyes Rose, you're scared. So scared that you won't like what you see. You don't want to remember those memories, but you are still trying…why?"

Biting my lip, I answered as honest as I could. "I don't want to be weak. I don't want anyone to walk eggshells around me thinking I might remember something horrible. If I remember, I want it all lay out on the table, and I want to beat the monster that I hiding inside, so maybe I could feel safe one day. Yes, I will cause major pain and heartbreak, but I will be free again and I will stop hurting the ones I love." I stopped as I saw him shaking his head slightly amused, but also slightly angry.

"And that's your problem Rose; you are doing this for everyone else. No matter how much pain it can cause you, you want to remember your old life and the people in it so they can be happy that you remember them. You're unselfish, always putting others before you." He breathed out and threw an arm over my shoulder comfortingly. "Think about yourself for once Rose."

I didn't have anything to say to that, because there wasn't a way to do that.

The others were still eating and talking mildly, so they didn't hear the conversation that just took place. I looked at my plate to see that it had remained untouched. So I didn't hurt Christian's feelings, I scraped my share of food onto Jeremiah's plate, knowing he would eat it.

He gave me a look but said nothing.

"Are you ready Rose?" Dimitri asked, putting his hands on my shoulders. I looked up at him and nodded, though I could see he was definitely not ready.

"I will be right here waiting for you when you get back Rose." Lissa said, pulling me into a hug. I smiled at her warmth and nodded my head.

"Thank you Liss," I whispered, knowing her nickname would make her smile. I was correct, because she beamed brightly at me and kissed my cheek.

Everyone else gave me hugs before I left, and I took in all of the courage that they were giving me. I knew that they didn't want me going, but they still said good luck. My mom didn't want to let go, and she whispered in my ear, "This is a big step for you…I rather you didn't, but there is no use stopping you. Please Rose, stay safe. I can't lose you again."

I pulled her into a hug, conveying my comfort through touch. She pulled back, wiping her eyes, before touching my cheek and nodding.

My dad and Dimitri were waiting for me in the doorway, so I walked past them and towards the front door. I saw my mom whisper something into Abe's ear before he nodded grimly and followed me along with Dimitri.

"What made you want to do this?" Dimitri asked leaning forward from the backseat. I was in the passenger seat while Abe drove towards the county jail where Nathan was being held. We had been driving for about ten minutes when Dimitri broke the silence.

"I was thinking about the things that are blocking me from remembering. What if I have to confront my past, to get past it? It might not work, and a small part of me doesn't want it to work, but I have too." I said, looking straight forward.

Dimitri said nothing, but I could still feel his presence behind me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw my dad's grimace deepen.

The rest of the ride was silent. We entered the city and soon were stopped in front of the police station. We all stared at the building, none of us getting of the car. I breathed in deeply.

Do I really want to do this? Was I really ready to face my past yet? I felt an urge to tell Abe to turn around a drive back, but I knew that we would immediately…and I needed to go.

_Need to? Or have to?_

I wanted to tell the voice in my head to be quiet, but it was true. I had to do this.

I had to remember Mason, Dimitri, Lissa…I have to get through all of the crap that has been going on in my life. If I don't do this, then that dark storm that rages through my body will forever be a down back on my life.

I wanted to live a free life, make new memories, and find that perfect job as a photographer. Hell, I could go back to my old job! I seemed to love it there!

Without hesitation, I opened the door and got out of the car, making my way towards the front doors. I heard Dimitri and my dad scrambling to follow me, and they made it to my side by the time that I opened the door.

The first thing I hear was the phones ringing and police officers walking all over the place. I searched with my eyes to find someone that could tell us where the holding cells were and finally spotted a secretary sitting at a desk with a phone by her ear.4

I walked over to her, waiting for her to get done, and she looked up at me clearly with brown eyes. Her hair was in a tight bun and a white blouse and black slacks adorned her body.

"What can I do for you?" She asked after hanging up the phone. I looked at Dimitri, not knowing what I was supposed to do from here.

"Yes, we have an appointment to see a fugitive named Nathan-"

"Yes…Dimitri Belikov?" She asked, interrupting him. He nodded and she grabbed a walkie talkie a pressed a button before saying, "Officer White…3 to see fugitive," she looked at her computer before saying "1459."

"Fugitive 1459 waiting in room D15, send them in," the voice send clearly back. She nodded and pointed to a set of doors to the right of us.

"Through those doors, turn right and there should be a sign on the door with the code D15," she instructed before looking back at her computer. I started for the door, but Dimitri grabbed my arm and walked in front of me with Abe walking behind me. I sighed, but didn't comment on their behavior.

We went through the doors and down the hallway finally stopping in front of a huge window beside a door. Two officers were standing outside of the door.

"Mr. Belikov?" The first officer asked, holding his hand out. He nodded and took the guys hand. "Mr. Mazur, nice to see you again. Who is this?"

I looked up at him and hugged myself so I could get away from his scrutiny.

"Well Officer White, I would just like to introduce you to my missing daughter Rose," he announced smugly. Officer White paled as he looked at me, and I could see his eyes tracing the scars over my body.

"Mr. Mazur, if this is your daughter, and then we need to inform the chief immediately and have a meeting with Ms. Hathaway too. This case can very well be reopened with the proof that your daughter is here and alive." He looked at me, before glancing at the window beside him. I followed his gaze and realized that the glass was a way to look into the room.

He stood facing the back wall, his back relaxed, and his hands crossed in front of him. I couldn't see his face but instantly I felt a surge of panic.

"Is this the reason that you called asking for a meeting with him?" Officer White asked. I couldn't take my gaze from Nathan, and Abe, realizing this, spoke for me.

"Yes Officer White, but I don't think a meeting with my daughter would be assuring right now. She was found in Oregon with amnesia and was housed with friends that found her. She still has memory loss so your answers will not be coming forward any time soon." Abe said sternly.

"I suggest, for her benefit, a therapist to gather back the information and hopefully help her regain her memories Mr. Mazur." The other officer replied quietly.

"I am not talking to a therapist, I will remember on my own without a therapist's help." I stated angrily, glaring at the officer.

"How about we talk more about this at a later time? I will talk to my chief right now so we can get the case started once more, and Ms. Hathaway, I am glad that you are alive and healthy." I nodded and watched him walk down the long hallway before disappearing.

We were left with the other officer who suggested a therapist and I resumed my glaring. He cleared his throat uncomfortably before gesturing towards the door.

"Shall we?"

I gulped, my hand aimlessly reaching out, for what I didn't know. Warm fingers laced with mine and I looked down, and let my eyes roam up the arm, over the shoulder, and towards Dimitri's handsome face filled with encouragement instead of anger.

I squeezed his hand and held on tight as the officer, whose name I didn't know, opened the door. I walked slowly towards the entrance and stared at the man more clearly. Once all three of us were in, the door closed keeping us inside with the devil.

"Your back soon," Nathan said eerily calm. I shivered, cowering into Dimitri's side. I didn't know if he knew it was us, but I finally got the courage to say something.

"I would've been back sooner if I wasn't held hostage by a lunatic." I replied, malice entering my voice. I saw his muscles tighten for a split second before he turned around to see for himself.

**So please review so I can break 400 and so everyone can get to read the confrontation soon! Harsh words are going to be said, and maybe a life-changing event...who knows? Please review and I will see you soon!**


	31. Chapter 31

**Okay I usually wait for some more peoples opinion on the last chapter but I'm so happy right now that I don't care. Don't you love the feeling you get when you don't have writers block? I wrote this non-stop and I loved it! So please ENJOY this chapter and thank you to the reviewers I had last chapter...oh and this can be considered an early fourth of july present;)**

**RPOV**

"My dear! You're alive! That's wonderful!" He exclaimed, his hands shooting up. Dimitri's hand gripped mine harder but I pulled back a little to stop him. "And I have seen that you have found daddy dearest after all! Well don't I just love happy endings? And who is this?"

His words were making me angry, but I could see that he definitely not pleased with this outcome. No matter what he said or did. I didn't like the way he phrased things and the hidden anger in his voice proved that he did not like being taken by surprise.

Plus, the way he was looking at Dimitri, the evil smile that he was shining at him made me want to kick him where the sun don't shine. Dimitri needs to be left out of this, whether I know the devil in front of me or not.

"You don't need to know his name," I snapped, taking a step forward. "This is only about you and me."

"Ha! I know him, silly me, he is the one shouting your name in the park…interrupting our little party. My, that was pretty rude of you; we were having plenty of fun." Nathan's eyes turned mischievous and a smirk landed on his mouth.

"You bastard," Dimitri spat, ready to charge forward. I grabbed his arm and pulled him back as hard as I could. "I can't believe how you can stand another day living with the thoughts of wanting to harm an innocent girl who had nothing to do with your plans. You are a monster that hasn't been taught a lesson but I think class is about to be in session."

Dad grabbed his other arm as we both pulled him back. I grabbed Dimitri's face in my hands, trying to loosen the muscles that were locked in place in his jaw. His nose flared with contained anger and I murmured to him softly so he would calm down.

I don't think it worked because his anger was formed from something that I didn't know about. I remember Eddie telling me about meeting him in the park and then hearing me scream but…was that the whole story? What exactly happened?

"What did you do," I whispered fiercely, forgetting my plan to leave him in the dark about my amnesia. Nathan looked none other than amused by my antics with Dimitri and when I spoke, it turned to me.

"You don't remember, my dear Rose?" I glared at him, not giving anything away. It didn't work. "Oh, I see the problem, did you fall at hit your head gaining amnesia Rosie? Or did you get hit by something hard?" He smirked, really enjoying the information he was gaining while the little I was receiving. This was all happening backwards.

"You bastard," I whispered, repeating Dimitri's words. I took three steps forward so only a small metal table stood in my way. Dimitri whispered a warning, trying to grab me, but I slipped out of his and my dad's reach. "You know damn well why I can't remember, and I want some answers."

"Like I need to answer to you," he sneered, losing his façade. His hands slammed down on the table and Dimitri threw an arm in front of me but I stayed where I was.

"You did this to _me_; my life is ruined because of _you_! Do you know how much _damage _you have created? I don't remember my life, I don't remember the people that care about me, and I can't remember the pain that you have caused, but I feel it and I see it every day! You sick bastard! You took my life away for revenge from your past! How stupid are you? My mom moved on, she found a life with this man right here!" I pointed at Abe, "and you ruined it because you were jealous. I hope you rot in this jail cell for the rest of your miserable life because you deserve it you masochistic selfish pig!"

I was panting once I was done yelling, and was slamming my hands on the table with every word that I said. Nathan stood there with a blank face, taking it all in as he stared at me. I met his gaze head on, not caring about the consequences.

"How do you even know it was me? You don't remember anything, so how do you know that I was the one that did all of that stuff to you! You have no hard proof!" He exclaimed, hitting a spot where I was weak. I wanted to argue right back, but found that I couldn't. He was right; I had no proof that he did this to me.

"But I have proof Nathan, which is why you are withering away in this jail cell. She might not have memories but I do, and when she recalls every single one of them, your life will be in a living hell. We have proof from doctors that she was severely raped, tortured, and kidnapped, also malnourished from lack of water and food from where you kept her hostage for weeks." My dad stated, walking closer and closer as he spoke, his voice even and blank, anger and madness simmering below his skin.

"You think I'm the only one out there Mazur? I have contacts and people who will find her and kill her in a second. I wouldn't be threatening me if I were you." Nathan replied lowly, but loud enough for me to grasp the words hard.

"Others," I whispered shakily, grabbing onto the table. Nathan turned his face towards me and smirked, leaning forward so he was close to my face.

"I never forgot about you Rosie, though it's a shame that you forgot about me. I had my men watching you, giving me feedback about your whereabouts and what you are doing. Don't think that I'm not alone Rose." Dimitri pushed Nathan back harshly, very close to losing his temper.

"Why are you telling me this?" I whispered, stumbling backwards.

"Because there are bad people in this world Rose, and I wouldn't want you getting hurt." He said grinning with that crazy look in his eyes that fear shot through me.

"Get her out of here now!" Dimitri ordered Abe, glaring at Nathan as he stalked forward and grabbed Nathan throwing him to the ground.

Abe started pushing me towards the door, but in my mind, all I could really see was the cold, crazy look of someone who won't stop until they get what they want.

"Don't worry Rosie, I will find you soon, and then we can go far away together, where no one will find us again and there won't be any windows to help you escape. Before careful how you play this game, you just might get hurt." Nathan said before laughing crazily as I was dragged through the door. I could still hear his laughter through the halls where police officers were now standing, crowding the exit.

I might have blacked out or something because when I opened my eyes again, I was lying in the backseat of the truck, my head in Dimitri's lap. He wasn't looking at me, but at Abe who was slamming his hands against the wheel over and over again.

"I can't believe I let her go in there! I'm so stupid!" He shouted, braking hard as we came upon a stop light.

"He was bluffing, I could see it in his eyes, and he was surprised to see her, so he didn't know that she was alive, so there is no way that he could have people following her around." Dimitri commented, smoothing my hair down unconsciously.

I started shaking as I remembered what had happened inside the interrogation room, remembering the promises he made and the words he stated. Dimitri felt me shake and looked down concerned. Once he saw that my eyes were open, he touched my cheek and started whispering things in my ear.

"Don't worry Rose, your safe, he won't get to you, he's locked up and no visitors are allowed anymore besides the officers and detectives. I promise that no one is following you." He whispered, wiping the newly formed tears away from my eyes.

"How can you be sure?" My voice shook and I could hardly breathe. I closed my eyes, trying to control it to no use.

He didn't answer which made my fear increase. He really wasn't sure; it was just a loose promise to console me. He didn't actually know if anyone was following us at this exact moment.

This was just great. Sarcasm intended. Before this happened, I had to deal with emotional breakdowns, memory loss, and painful meetings with people that I don't remember loving. Now, I have to deal with all of that, trying to make the people around me happy, and to top it all off, I have to looked behind my back when I walking in my own house because someone could be watching me at any moment and come finish Nathan's job.

Why me?

That's all I wanted to know. Why I, of all people, have to deal with all this fear and pain and frustration? It isn't fair! I know the saying is life isn't fair, but come on! I think I got the literal end of the stick.

This was too much for me; I didn't want to deal with this anymore. I wanted to disappear, start over, forget everything and everyone and just live another life.

Reincarnation, that's where my thoughts were heading, I believed in it, knowing that we never got one try, but many that we just can't remember. But to be reincarnated…you have to die first and give it 50 years before you could come back new.

This was the first time that I thought about dying, but not by another person's hand. I thought about suicide, killing myself. I didn't want to think about it, I hated thinking about it because it wasn't right but that future started looking better and better now.

I wouldn't have to deal with Nathan, and I wouldn't have to deal with painful memories that will come to me in the future. I wouldn't have to watch over my back and I wouldn't have to make difficult decisions.

I could already hear the 'but' however, and it was clear in my head that I had to consider it. I couldn't do this to my family, or my friends, I just reconnected to them, knowing why I considered them my friends in the first place. And my parents, they just got me back, and I just gained them back. Dying, to them, a second time would kill them, and I would rather take a bullet then to cause them or anyone else more pain.

Dimitri, this man that has been here ever since he saw me alive, was someone that not even I could feel myself part from. I was falling for him, maybe all over again, because I knew, even if I don't remember, that I have always been in love with him. He was perfect, nice, caring, protective, and loving. I know if we had a casual conversation, that he would also be funny and encouraging.

Did he feel the same? Did we ever act on these feelings before if he did? I loved Dimitri Belikov, even if it has only been two days because I could feel old feeling resurfacing. I couldn't lose him.

I looked up at him watching as his dark, brown eyes magically bore into mine with love and sympathy. They were orbs of hidden feelings and deep regrets, a soul that travels deep and is pure and perfect. I could know everything about him just by looking into his eyes. And then his hair softly framed his face, looking like a glorious angel fallen from the sky only to hold me in his comforting arms and heal me.

His lips were parted and he took in small breaths and I could imagine myself behind held to him with those warm lips pushed onto my forward with love. One arm would be around my waist tightly, but also soft enough to melt in, and the another arm would be in my hair playing with the strands.

His large physique could scare off predators, protect me from danger, but when it was all over, it would wrap me up as if I was being held by a bubble of warmth and happiness. He could be a destructible lion or a soft, loving teddy bear.

I thought of myself letting my hands tracing his abs, feeling him shiver as I did when his hands roamed my back. I wanted to anchor myself to him, never leaving his gaze and embrace.

This is why I couldn't kill myself, because something would always be missing with every life that I wake up in. I couldn't tear myself away from this perfect man, and he was the thing that kept me sane or I would have gone crazy already with all of this happening.

I could face anything if Dimitri was at my side, and I knew that I needed to stop being scared and start fighting. Dimitri gave me the will, just with his eyes that I could take on anything. I could protect myself, and I could get past this, I was sure of it.

When I could tear my gaze away from his, I found that the car was stopped and my dad was already gone from the car. Dimitri and I, for who knows how long, have been sitting in this car by ourselves lost in another world. Dimitri must have realized the same thing because he looked around confused.

"Dimitri," I said uneasily, trying to gain back his attention. His eyes snapped towards me while I shifted position so I was sitting beside him in the seat.

"Yes Rose," he replied grabbing my hand. I relished in the contact, breathing in his deep scent and letting it comfort me.

"I don't want to be scared of him." I whispered, one tear trailing down my cheek. He reached forward with our entwined hand and wiped the tear away with the back of his hand.

"I wish I could take the fear away from you, you don't know how much I wish that I could protect you from this pain," his voice came out ragged and I put my forehead on his shoulder so he couldn't see the tears I was crying.

"Dimitri, you are already protecting me from the pain. Just being here make me feel like I am protected from everything. And your eyes," I whispered, looking up so I could place my hand on his cheek to stare into his eyes, "make me feel like I could take on the world and fight. Your keeping me grounded, not letting me float away from who I am, and Dimitri I-I," I let out a shuttered breath, "I love you Dimitri."

I don't know if I wanted to tell him that now, but it felt good to just let the words float through my lips. I blushed deeply, looking away from his intense gaze, only to have his fingers grasp my chin lightly and pull me back.

"Rose-"

"I know I'm a broken mess," I babbled, not wanting to hear his denial, "and that there is no way someone like you could deal with me. I mean, I might not ever get better but I still want to tell you thank you for staying as long as you have and-"

"_Roza,_" he interrupted, his voice exasperated, "be quiet, please." I instantly shut my mouth, embarrassed at my nervous rant. Dimitri lifted our still entwined hands and placed his other one on top, encasing my small hands completely. Slowly he brought his hands and mine towards my chest, right over the spot where my heart is supposed to be.

My breathing stuttered at his dark eyes as they bore into mine. I couldn't see anything but him, while I felt his touch burn my body harshly.

Slowly his hands unwrapped and grasped my hand, opening it so it was flat so he could press it against my heart. I felt the uneven strum as it beat and I wondered what he wanted me to understand.

"Roza, do you feel that?" He asked, leaning close. I turned so I was fully facing him, one leg hooked under my body over the seat while the other fell off brushing against his.

"My heartbeat?" I asked confused; what did he want with that?

"Yes Roza, your heartbeat. Do you realize how special and fragile that sound is to me? It's the feeling of life and it's not broken, it beating strongly. You might be scratched with a few cracks, but you are not a broken mess." Tears pooled in my eyes and I understood the warm, strong emotion overlaying his features. "There is no way that I will run away from you, I _will _stay right here helping you and fixing you for however long it takes. I don't care if it takes forever because nothing can separate you from me. I love you too Rose, forever. And I will take every piece of you I can get; nothing will tear me away from you, nothing."

I think I was a sobbing mess, because he pulled me close so I was mostly on top of him. His arms were around me tightly, keeping me close as I cried into his chest; his lips touched the top of my head multiple times.

Once I could see again, I pulled back realizing that I was sitting on Dimitri's lap as his legs spread out against the whole backseat. His back was pressed against the side of the door and my head was on his shoulder.

"It's hard to think that anybody would love me," I whispered, pulling my arm up and pulled back the shirt. I stared at the scars around my wrists and his fingers vaguely traced the lines.

"These marks are a part of you, they represent the things you have lived through and show that you are stronger than everyone else. You beautiful Roza, nothing can take that away from you." I closed my eyes, turned my face into the crook of his neck.

I felt a tugging on my mind and a slight headache but I pushed it back and looked at him from beneath my eyelashes. "I love you Dimitri, you're a god-send from heaven that happened to find me and keep me protected."

"I will always love you Roza," he whispered, resting his forehead on mine. Our noses touched as he leaned closer but I was the one that leaned forward and kissed him. The pressure in my head increased before it felt like my brain exploded.

It was exactly painful, but it was overwhelming. I gasped into the kiss and when Dimitri started to pull back, I only pulled him back with my hand around his neck and kissed him deeper.

Light broke through but only for a split second before I was met with terrifying pain and darkness. I only felt Dimitri gasp my name in fear before I fell into the dark remembrance of my past.

**Soooo anyone know what happened to Rose? Its pretty obvious but anyone know why it happened? Please give your feedback and I will update soon! Please review and see you later:)**


	32. Chapter 32

**Heyyyyy guys:) Yes I'm in a very good mood because I loved all of the reviews I got and decided that you guys should get another chapter! Thank you to everyone that reviewed and during Rose's point of view, I had an idea going and one of you reviewers had the same one (you know who you are). So I give some credit to you and ENJOY this chapter!**

**DPOV**

I had finally kissed her and told her I love her, but what the hell just happened?

I remembered our lips touching in a soft embrace and felt her fingers caress the back of my neck sending soft chills down my entire body. I melted into her soft, fragile body but when I heard her gasp in shock and pain, I broke apart.

What was going on? What did I do? Was she hurt?

When I tried to back away however to ask her, she pulled me back quickly…not that I was complaining.

I wondered what was going on through her mind because she was distracted, obviously cowering into my lips in protection. I pulled away once again, and this time she didn't react, her eyes were frozen and distant. Her pupils were dilated and her breathing was ragged.

I said her name loudly as her quivering body shut down and limply fell onto me. I was scared shitless, not knowing what was happening to her. I didn't know what to do, I felt like a little kid again.

I switched positions quickly, cradling her to my body as I opened to car door harshly and got out. I slammed the door and ran with her in my arms to the front door. This was the second time today that she had passed out, third if including the loss of surroundings on our run earlier that morning.

I walked quickly towards the voices emanating from the front living room, keeping my eyes on the brown-headed beauty passed out in my arms.

"Dimitri, what happened?" Janine exclaimed, rushing to her daughter's side. I breathed out, wondering how I was going to explain it without telling her about our kiss.

"She was sitting beside me crying so I held her but when she calmed down enough to look at me, her eyes went blank and her pupils dilated, I don't know what happened!" I said, wanting to hit my head on a wall. Was it really my fault?

"Dimitri, son, don't worry, I'm sure she was just overwhelmed by the turn of events and her mind needed to regain its ability to speak." Abe said, touching my arm as he looked at his daughter.

I nodded my head, quickly accepting that though it was far off. Why at that point did she black out? Why did she get overwhelmed during our kiss?

Lissa caught my eye; hers were narrowed as she scanned my face. I quickly set my face into an emotionless mask but she saw this and gave me a look.

"How about I take you to a room that you can lay Rose down in, Dimitri," she said, sugar-coating her words as she walked past me. I sighed, picking Rose up as I followed Lissa out of the room.

"What happened out there Dimitri, don't lie to me." She stated immediately once we reached an empty guest room. Her arms crossed over her chest and her foot tapped impatiently against the hard-wood.

"We really were just talking, but before that, she seemed as if she was thinking very hard about something. She told me…" I smiled at the memory, "she told me that she loved me."

Lissa gaped at me, before walking towards the bed and touching Rose's arm affectionately. She still seemed in shock, so I gave her a minute to process this information.

"She thought that I couldn't love her however, saying that she was a 'broken mess'…but I told her that I disagreed. She thinks that no one would like her because of the things she went through! I mean, she doesn't realize that Doreene and John gave her a home because they saw a beautiful, young girl that was strong because she survived the impossible. She doesn't realize that we don't care what she went through because we will love her anyways. She is in denial."

Lissa shook her head, sifting her fingers through Rose's brown hair while she thought. She looked up at me and asked, "Did she tell you that?"

"No," I replied hanging on the word, "but I know her well enough to think that."

"Well did you…um…tell her you loved her back?" She said uneasily, glancing up at me.

"I did." I stated, hoping Rose's best friend would accept this like she did before Rose was presumed dead.

"I'm glad," she started, "but I just wish she wouldn't have found love in the darkest of places in her life, though I do hope that you can help her get better."

"I hope I can. Love can push through the impossible right?" I said hope filling my words. She smiled but it seemed she had nothing to say to that.

"What happened afterwards?" She continued, nodding her head to carry on with my explanation.

"Well I, uh, kissed her and she seemed to respond at first…but then she became unresponsive and gave a gasp of shock and pain. I tried to see what happened but she continued kissing me. I didn't know what happened but all the sudden she just passed out on me!" I exclaimed, pulling at my hair. My past fears resurfaced and the words 'my' and 'fault' traveled inside of my mind.

"Dimitri, it's not your fault." Lissa said firmly, meeting my eyes. I grimaced and said nothing. Sighing, she stood up and gestured for me to follow her. "Come on; let's let her sleep it off."

I glanced worriedly at Rose, noticing her peaceful expression, before following Lissa out of the room. We entered the living room again and I saw down next to Eddie, leaning wearily against the back of the couch.

"Don't worry man; I'm sure Rose will be fine." Eddie commented, patting my shoulder. Everyone else was having a small discussion so they didn't hear us talking. Eddie was good friend, and called me recently when I was in Russia to keep me updated on things down here. I trusted him with my life, along with Adrian and Christian…though it would be smart to trust him seeing as we are cousins.

"Thank you," I replied, hoping he understood what I was thanking him for. He nodded his head before turning back to the discussion.

I couldn't really pay attention to what was happening, and I think at one point I think the girls got up to make lunch. The three guys were talking about nothing of importance while I sat there deep in thought.

That was until a loud; ear piercing scream rang through the house.

**RPOV**

I really didn't know where I was. I wasn't scared though because the peace that I was feeling at that moment was overwhelming. The meadow I was in was filled with wildflowers and some bluebonnets. A small creek was to my right and a forest was to my left. In front of me…was the thing that got me confused.

If I walked through it, then it looked like I would fall into nothingness, but if I walked up a touched it, then I could imagine it being a glass wall.

It was very strange.

Was this a dream? The last thing I remember was an overwhelming dark blanket crowding my mind, and before that I remember kissing Dimitri. Did I pass out kissing Dimitri?

Or was that a dream too?

Ugh, this was frustrating.

"Hey Rose," I screeched, turning around to the voice. A guy with red hair and freckles stood in front of me with a tight black shirt and army pants. I eyed him curiously, pointing out the fact that he was pretty cute.

"Who are you, and why did you sneak up on me?" I stated, ignoring the last fact.

"I think you know who I am Rose," he stated simply, a cute, boyish grin slipping over his façade. I tried to piece it together, but had no clue.

"Come on Rose, I would think I would leave a lasting impression seeing as I _died _for you." He stated smirking. _Oh my god. _

"Mason?" I asked unsure. He started clapping before raising his hands to the sky a crying hallelujah.

"I thought you would never remember me!" he exclaimed happily.

"Is this a dream?" I asked him, looking around.

"Sort of…we are actually locked inside of your mind." He said waving his fingers around magically.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I retorted, waving my fingers like him sarcastically.

"It means that this is your chance to decide." Mason said mysteriously. I crossed my arms, trying to cover myself from the cold feeling inside of me.

"Decide what?"

"If you want your memories back or not."

I stared at him in shock, "your joking right?"

His face took on a serious edge to it as he looked at me. "I'm definitely not joking Rose."

"Why now? Why am I just given this decision now?" I yelled exasperated. Mason grimaced and shook his head repeatedly.

"Rose, what were you doing right before you came here?" He asked, walking around me.

"I was, um, kissing Dimitri?" I said, my words coming out in a question. He made a disgusted sound but continued walking. I wish I knew where he was heading with this.

"What were you feeling?" He questioned, tapping his chin. I breathed out harshly and gave him a sharp look. He out his hands out in front of him as if protecting himself from me. "I'm just helping you out Rose!"

"Fine, I was feeling protected and safe in his arms," I replied, remembering the feeling of being held in Dimitri's arm ready to fight anything in my way but safe with Dimitri in front of me too.

"Exactly, and what did Doreene say to you?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"She said something like 'maybe your memories will come back when you feel…safe'," I whispered, coming to the realization. He smiled brightly and clapped his hands.

"You feel safe with Dimitri, ready to take on the world, so this is your mind telling you that it's your decision now if you want to see these memories. They are rough Rose, and it won't be easy to on you, but if you think that you can handle them, than tell me and I can show you your life in seconds." He said, holding his hands out by his sides.

I think this was too much to take in at the moment and I knelt down to gain my bearings. Closing my eyes, I breathed in deeply. It was now or never. Did I really want to see too horrible memories of me being raped and tortured? OR did I want to live in ignorance for the rest of my life?

"Think hard on this Rose," Mason whispered, rubbing my arms soothingly. I thought over every little thing that has happened to me since I woke up in that hospital. I thought about Lissa and Dimitri, and all of my other friends Mia, Sydney, Eddie, Adrian, Christian, and my parents. I thought about those guys that I first met...Denis, Artur, and Lev. I thought about my job, wondering if I could even get that job back if I don't remember what I did before.

I wanted to remember all of that, however, all of those good memories that I have had in the past outweighed the bad, and I couldn't lose those memories, I savor them. I mean sure, I will have to deal with the pain of the kidnapping, but I will get through it.

With this I made my decision.

"I want to remember," I told him, nodding my head. Mason smiled and moved forward to kiss my cheek.

"I know you would make the right decision Rose. You will get through this I know you will. You are the strongest person I know. Eddie, Lissa, Dimitri…they will help you through this because they love you Rose. Don't ever think that they won't love you because of what happened because you know that is not true." He breathed out and shook his head. "And don't be scared to keep Doreene and your friends from Oregon close. They are just as much your family as everyone else is."

I smiled, loving the way that he understood me so easily. I nodded my head and waited for him to start. I was slightly nervous but knew I was doing the right thing.

"I know, thank you Mason, for being here and for that night." I whispered, touching his arm. He smiled and pulled me into a hug.

"I would do it again in a flash." He replied, pulling back. "Okay I am going to touch your forehead slightly." He said before his fingertips touched my temple. I breathed in deep before feeling the tugging in my head. I was looking forward, towards the space in front of me when I saw pictures starting to flash across.

I could see it flashing through my mind as it did on the screen in front of me. I watched amazed as they passed by, looking at the woman that had been a star in most of my dreams.

_Alberta. _I whispered tearfully in my mind. I watched the memory of the day her car crashed, making me feel like it was my fault. I gasped as I remember what I tried to do a year later.

Cutting myself, taking pictures of it, tears pooled in my eyes and I dropped to the ground once more, my eyes never leaving the screen. I saw a red cardinal standing on a branch while I took a picture of it.

More years of my life flashed and I smiled through the tears as I saw my first meeting with Lissa. We both ran into each other on our way to our first day of class at college.

Things that I never thought I could remember showed up and I felt myself laughing at the mini film playing itself before me. I was so happy that I was remembering this, my decision never felt righter. I smiled as I so myself fighting with Christian as he tried to hit on Lissa at my job, Spirit Magazine.

I was so happy there, though I would tell Sydney, my _assistant, _how much I hated it. I was looked up to by all my employees and intimidated everyone I met.

This person I was watching was someone that I thought I would never meet again…a stronger, more trustful me. I felt her mold inside of me, reminding me of who I am.

_Welcome back_, I whispered to her inside of my mind. My sarcasm felt great to use again and my strong personality felt warm inside of my body.

I also remember myself meeting Eddie and Mia in college at a local café. I remember seeing only one seat left in the café at their table and decided to sit with them. We hit it off quickly.

I felt a tear fall when I saw the way I was given to a nanny when my mom worked every day...never having time for me. I could now remember that my dad was almost never home because of his job.

It was hard to remember that…but I also remember now that it isn't the same any more.

I smiled as I watched the memory of meeting Dimitri roll out in my mind. It was the greatest experience ever, and then having to sleep in the same house as him because he was Christian's cousin and needed a place to stay.

And then the pain started.

I didn't want to watch what happened next, because this is what was going to tear me down. I couldn't however because they played whether I like it or not.

The first was the phone call.

The second was the park meeting.

The third was the first time Nathan tried to rape me.

The fourth was the time I woke up with the scar on my face.

The fifth was the pain of losing mason in the hospital because someone killed him.

The sixth was being kidnapped.

And then the rest was too painful to watch. I could actually feel the pain and depression that played through the scenes. I was screaming as I felt each stab and bruise he left on me, watching as the scars on my body turned red and then back to their normal color, showing when each one happened and where.

I screamed as my cries pierced through the room as he raped me. My hunger grew heavy as he stopped feeding me when I didn't respond. I was scared…and couldn't get away. I was useless.

I wanted to escape; I wanted to leave the pain.

My screaming never stopped, not even when I finally escaped and passed out in Doreene and John's living room. I was living in hell, and nothing could stop me from letting the memories play out over and over again in my mind.

I was still screaming when I woke up.

**DPOV**

She wouldn't stop screaming, and I was freaking out.

Her thrashing wasn't helping either, but all of us guys held her down as best as we could, while the girls tried talking her down. It was probably the second scariest moment of my life.

"Take it back!" She screamed, her chest lifting high in the air.

"Take what back damn it!" Christian yelled cursing as Rose swung at his face. I couldn't help by agree with him silently.

"I don't want them anymore!" She yelled again, turning back in front as if she was trying to get away from something. Lissa and Sydney whispered assurances to her while they rubbed her arms and ran their fingers through her hair. Lissa looked like she wanted to break down sobbing at that exact moment.

I wasn't far behind.

I listened to everyone freaking out and yelling to each, wondering what I could do to calm everyone so I could figure this out. The hard thing was my head was experiencing the same commotion too.

I stared at her, trying to figure out what was hurting her. I held onto her arm and I glanced at it, feeling the tug as if she wanted to pull it to her head. Letting go, I watched her hand grip her head tightly in pain. I gasped in realization and told Christian to let go of her other arm.

I think even in her subconscious, she knew how much she loved annoying Christian, because when he let go, she swung harshly at him, hitting his shoulder hard.

"OW!" He exclaimed, glaring at her before turning it on me. I shrugged my shoulders but told everyone to be quiet as I watched Rose grip her head hard.

"She's remembering something, and I have a feeling that it takes place during her kidnapping." I stated through her screams. I leaned over the top half of her body and touched Rose's head, holding my hands over her small ones.

I still didn't understand what she was yelling about, but the object of her memory seemed to hit straight on from what I could see. I whispered reassurances to her while Adrian and Eddie held her legs still. Rose's eyes were tightly squeezed shut before but now they swung open as she let out one more ear piercing scream.

Everyone was eerily quiet due to the lack of screaming and I saw relief gather on a couple of their faces. Janine and Abe stood off to the side, Janine sobbing into her husband's arms. Doreene was leaning against the wall with Jeremiah's hand touching her shoulder comfortingly.

"Rose?" Lissa whispered, coming to my side. Rose looked over at her, her breathing labored and her skin oiled with sweat.

"Lissa," Rose whispered her voice child-like and scared. Lissa leaned down and hugged Rose quickly, while Rose wrapped her arms around Lissa's small frame and started sobbing.

We all watched the two sisters hug, and I think, for Lissa, that she finally feels reconnected with her best friend. Christian touched Lissa's back, wanting to stay close to his crying fiancé.

When Lissa pulled back, I finally caught a good glimpse into Rose's eyes. I know that I told her that she wasn't a broken mess, but I don't know how wrong I was now. There was no life in her eyes, as if she experienced something that just stole her life force away.

"What happened, Rose?" Lissa whispered calling back Rose's blank attention.

"I-I rather not talk about it right now," she said, her voice shaking as pain flickered across her face.

"Are you okay?" Eddie asked, touching her leg where he had previously been holding it. Rose let her head fall sideways on the pillow as she stared at nothing.

"Yes and no," she said uneasily, "I'm just tired."

I think everyone knew that she was lying, but Abe cleared his throat and said, "We will just let you sleep then." Everyone nodded their heads and started getting up. I stayed sitting but Abe noticed and gave a stern look.

"Give me a second, please," I murmured, asking permission from him. He looked at me for a second before nodding and walking out of the room.

"Dimitri, please," Rose whispered, not looking at me. I sighed loudly, feeling like I needed this question answered before I left her.

"Rose, I just want to ask you one question, please…I won't be able to leave." I whispered, also not looking at her. I heard her shift in the bed and look at me. I breathed out shakily, hoping her silence meant that I could talk. "I- I just want to know did…did I," tears accidently pooled in my eyes and I felt Rose grasp my hand though she was the one that I needed to comfort, "was I the cause of her relapse?"

It had been hard to state that question, because I really hope that me kissing her didn't remind her of Nathan. I wouldn't ever kiss her again if I hurt her like that. I would sacrifice her kisses if it meant she wouldn't be in pain.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Rose's eyebrows rise in surprise. "Y-Yes, how did you-"

"I'm sorry, god I'm so sorry Rose, I can't believe I helped you remember that horrible memory. I promise I will never do that to you again, I don't ever want to cause you that much pain again. If-"I rambled throwing my head into my hands as the tears escaped from my eyes.

"Dimitri! Dimitri stop! What do you think I remembered?" She asked, eyeing me warily.

"I mean, you were in so much pain, I had a feeling that you were remembering a memory from your-your kidnapping. I'm so sorry Rose," I whispered, now grabbing my hair in my hands.

"Dimitri," she whispered brokenly, grabbing my hand, "you have the wrong idea."

"I-I do?" I asked confused, looking over at her. Tears were in her eyes as her bottom lip trembled.

"Well I did remember a memory from my kidnapping, but-"she hesitated like she didn't know if she wanted to tell me or not.

"But?" I questioned, urging her on.

"But it wasn't the only thing I remembered," she said gripping my hand. I gaped at her, understanding her. I did have the wrong idea…

"It was worse," I finished my thought out loud, returning my face to my hands. I heard Rose sigh and pull the hand she was currently holding.

"Dimitri," she said exasperated, "you're not letting me finish a sentence!"

"Sorry," I whispered, looking away.

"When I say that it wasn't the only thing that I remembered, I meant that I also remembered…everything else." She stated, breathing out like she was relieved she had said it. I stared at her dumbstruck.

"What?" I replied dumbly, staring at her.

"I remembered everything, my amnesia broke."

**Unknown POV (Though obviously it's known)**

"You idiotic ass, I gave you one simple task, and you can't even do that right!" I exclaimed, staring angrily at the man with the badge.

"There wasn't anything to go on!"

"She showed up here, mostly rubbing in my face that she was alive and still kicking. I'm barely relieved that she has that damn amnesia! If she remembers anything and tells it to the fucking cops then I am screwed for the rest of my life!" I shouted, hitting my hands on the table.

"What do you want me to do then." He asked sarcastically, folding his arms together. He is lucky the cop uniform he was wearing came with a gun or I would have strangled him.

"I need her dead, and I need it done soon. There can't be any guesses about her death this time." I snarled looking out the back window.

"I'll call in Dean as soon I get-"

"No," I stated, cutting off his worthless rant, "I need to do it myself."

"And how Nathan, do you plan do that?" He muttered amused. I snarled and reached over the table grabbing the collar of his shirt and pulling him forward.

"It's time for a jail break."

**Soooo? I know this was bad, but I was crying and laughing during the part when Dimitri wasn't listening to Rose. Sorry thats mean I'll stop but please review and I think this story has few more chapter left...maybe 4? It seems like a good number:) Anyways...umm...bye..and umm Ill see you soon;) **


	33. Chapter 33

**Hey:) Sorry for not updating for a while, but i've been a little busy! Last night, I had such bad writers block at the beginning of this chapter, but after taking a small break it all came back to me and this is by far my LONGEST chapter!:) It makes me excited.**

**I also want to let you know that there should be 2-3 chapters left (the third being the epilogue). I'm sad to see this story go but it has to end sometimes :'(**

**Anyways...there is a slight time skip inside and also a unexpected job offer. ;) Please ENJOY :D**

**R****POV**

It took a while for the words to click inside Dimitri's head. I wanted to place my hands on his shoulders and shake him, but I was scared on how he would react.

"Dimitri?" I asked softly, needing some sort of reaction from him.

"Are you…are you sure?" He gasped, his eyes piercing into me. I nodded my head, grabbing one of his hands. "How? Why?" He blinked as if he was becoming aware of his surroundings. Without time to react, he grabbed my face in his hands, softly, and looked me over. "Are you okay?"

I thought over his words. Was I okay? "No," I whispered, shaking my head sadly, "it's worse than I could ever imagine." I guess the truth does hurt, because Dimitri looked pained as he brought me close and whispered soothing words in my ear.

"So…so I didn't do this to you?" He asked hesitantly, looking down at me with child-like eyes.

"Not exactly," I told him, biting my lip. I put a finger over his lips when he anxiously tried talking, "yes, you helped me remember, but not by the way you're thinking."

"How," I stated, still thinking that he did something horribly wrong.

"My doctor, and Doreene, told me one time when I was still at the hospital that my memories are locked away because I didn't feel safe yet. Dimitri, when we were in the car, I felt safe and protected in your arms. I felt like I could get through anything by your side. My mind decided that I was safe from harm because I had you. I know it looked horrible when I remember those horrible m-memories, but you also helped me remember all of my good memories."

I stared at him, placing my hands on top of his which were still placed firmly on my face. I turned my face and kissed the palm of his hands before pulling them off of my face.

"You don't hate me?" I stared at him in shock, wondering why on Earth I would hate him for.

"Hate you! Quite the opposite actually, I love you," I breathed, squeezing his hands.

"But I made you remember what happened to you, you were screaming and in pain, I-I," he seemed like he was at a loss for words and I breathed out annoyed. God, he was stubborn.

"Dimitri, it was bound to happen sooner or later."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, shaking his head as he looked down and away from my eyes. I shook my head and gripped his chin with my fingers and pulled him up to my level.

"Don't be," I breathed, leaning up at kissing him. Dimitri didn't respond for a few seconds but he quickly put one hand behind my head and the other on my cheek.

"Rose," he whispered against my lips, "you don't have to act strong in front of me."

I knew he could see the strength it was taking me to block the memories before they took me over again, and I was scared to face them. I didn't want to remember, though it was hard not to.

"I have to, I don't want to remember," I told him, my watery eyes flickering away from him.

"I will help you through this Rose, I swear I will," he said, kissing the tear trails on my face.

"I love you Dimitri," I whispered, loving the feel of the words roll off my lips.

"I love you too Roza," he said kissing my lips before standing up.

"I need to tell them, but I feel like I'm going to fall apart if I do," I told him, taking the covers off.

"I will be right next to you," he said, grabbing my hand. I stood up shakily and swallowed back another memory. We started walking out of the room and down the stairs, slowly, to allow myself time to think about what I'm going to say."

_"Now Rosie, this will be over so fast, it won't give you time to think," Nathan whispered from where he was poised above me. I tried moving away but he gripped me tighter and put the knife on my neck. "I wouldn't do that if I were you."_

_Before I could scream, he tortured me further, forcing himself onto me harsher and deadlier. It was too painful to scream from and I was choking on my own blood and sobs._

"Rose," I gasped and hid my face in his shirt, ashamed of myself. I felt so defenseless, so weak.

"I can't," I whispered painfully, feeling my body shaking with fear. He must have realized what happened because he tensed and tightened his hold on me.

"Your strong enough, take the memory and show your power over it. Let it be afraid of you, instead of the other way around. You're stronger than him Rose," I didn't know if Dimitri knew what he was saying, but it helped.

I was still shaking slightly from the memory but I watched it again, trying to show no fear before shoving back into the recesses of my mind. Looking up at Dimitri, I smiled wearily and wiped the tears away.

"Dimitri…" I trailed off, remembering the training Dimitri and I were going to start before I was kidnapped.

"Yes Milaya?" He answered looking down at me softly.

"Do you think you can start training me again?" I asked, looking up at Dimitri hopefully. He knew my reasons for wanting to train again and hopefully allow it.

"Of course I can," he replied, kissing my forehead. Happy with his answer, I turned and started walking again, taking in the house that I used to call my second home.

We walked in silence, and I hated it, because when there was silence, there was pain. It made me remember the silence I experienced when I waited for Nathan's daily visits. During the silence, I thought of escape, and death. Wanting both, but never close enough to gain it. I would try, and fail, not to think about the horrible things I was going through.

Right now, I thought about what the memories that encased my mind, keeping a dark fill around it. I knew it was a lost cause to push them back, and it was lie to everyone as I tried to look fine, when in my mind I wanted to die and scream.

It was 200 times worse than what I imagined. All those times, thinking about if I really wanted to remember, I knew the answer to now. I didn't, I really didn't. With these memories came wanting death so I could escape the torture.

Mason, he was there, in my subconscious, begging me to remember him and the good memories we shared. I believed the good memories would outweigh the bad, and I could get through it, but I was terribly wrong. I could only think about the bad.

I guess it could be worse, if I was alone without my family and friends than I wouldn't have been walking alongside the love of my life. He was the only thing, helping me hold on.

One thing I didn't expect upon remembering my past was the anger and hate. I wanted to kill Nathan for making me go through this, I wanted to make him torture how I did. I hated him with the deepest passion, but I would also go through it 100 more times if it meant my dad was safe as he is now.

It made me wonder what happened during my escape, though I didn't want to dwell on it. How did my dad get out?

"Rose," Dimitri said, shaking me out of my, very dangerous and scary, thoughts. I blinked and realized we were standing in front of the entrance to the living room. I gulped and told myself to calm down; it was only my family and friends.

But it felt like it was the first time I would see them since the kidnapping, and I had an urge to run through the doors and hug every one of them. I took the last step and turned the corner slowly, looking at the occupants of the large room.

"Oh Rose, are you okay," Lissa asked, standing up quickly, worried. I could see the hesitation in her eyes and the argument going on through her head like she was stopping herself from running and hugging me.

So I did just that.

I gripped Lissa in a hard hug, tears falling down my face again as I hugged my best friend. I gulped in my sobs as I held onto her. Lissa gasped when I ran into her but quickly hugged me back.

"I missed you Liss," I whispered, hiding my face in her platinum blonde hair. I felt her stiffen as she heard the double meaning in my words.

"Rose," she whispered, shock littering her voice.

"The one and only," my voice broke as I leaned back. Christian stood behind her worriedly and I could tell no one else heard our exchange.

"You know sparky, I would think that you actually had feelings if you keep looking at me like that," I stated, my voice hoarse as I smiled warily.

Shock registered on his features and he shook his head. Deciding he was already in shock, I ran and threw my arms around my very annoying, caring brother.

"Is what I think is happening, happening?" He asked quietly. I pulled back and nodded, surprised to actually see tears in Christian's eyes. Him crying made me start crying again and I quickly turned away from him.

"What happened to her?" Adrian whispered to Eddie behind me. I turned around and smiled at the two boys who looked at me wearily.

Instead of walking over to them however, I turned, searching for a set of eyes that matched my very own. Instantly, I sprinted towards him and threw my arms around his neck.

"Dad," I whispered into his neck, sobs wracking my body as I held onto like my life depended on it.

"Rose, what's wrong, what happened?" He asked, holding me to him. He was safe, and was united with my mom again.

"I should be asking you that! How did you get away?" I asked him anxiously, pulling away. My dad looked confused and looked at my mom beside him.

"Get away from what Rose?" He asked hesitantly, sitting me down beside him.

"N-Nathan," I stuttered, flinching at the name and the amount of hate laced my voice.

He stared at me surprised and pained for a few seconds before he realized what I was asking and implying. "You remember?" I nod my head. "Everything?"

I nod my head again but bite my lip to stop the tears from flooding over. I had cried enough as it is. I felt my dad kiss my forehead and pull me into his arms. "I wish I didn't," I reply finally, breathing out sharply as images of Nathan filled my head.

"Can you tell us what happened?" He whispered, pulling away. I froze, staring at him panicked, not wanting to go back and think about the dreadful images.

"I don't think that is a good idea Abe," Dimitri replied for me, rubbing my back comfortingly. I shook slightly, but relaxed to his touch.

"I guess not, I'm so sorry sweetheart," dad said softly, kissing my forehead again.

"Do you think we can-focus on being happy about my _good _memories returning? I don't want to remember only the bad; I don't want to be smothered by them. I can't take much more, and I just want to forget." I break out, rambling out crazily as I looked at him and Dimitri.

"Of course we can Roza," he replied, looking at Abe who nodded in agreement. I breathed out and smiled, trying to focus on my good memories.

The rest of the night, I reconnected with my friends and family, pushing out the bad memories. I talked to Lissa, wondering when she was going to finally get married. She told me that now that I'm here, it will be soon.

"I couldn't keep the original date and you know why Rose, I couldn't do it without you," Lissa murmured, gripping my hand. I smiled and nodded my head.

"Your right, I am the life of the party," I replied as light as I could. I wasn't being very truthful because the Rose that would have been just that is gone. I'm not the same, nor will I be for a long time.

She giggled and nodded her head before tilting her head curiously. "Will you still take the pictures?"

"Of course," I replied, "wait, is that why you were at the exhibit?" I questioned, realization hitting me. She nodded her head but grimaced.

"That, and because we wanted to put the remembrance of you there," she replied softly. I bit my lip and nodded.

I would always come back to what happened; I couldn't get rid of it. It always came back to my kidnapping and it would lead to me blanking out and becoming unresponsive.

I approached Eddie and Mia during the night and talked to them. Eddie said he went to Mason's grave once a week and brought flowers for him and he even put a picture of all three of us beside it.

Even Eddie couldn't keep the memories away.

"I would tell Mason to take care of you Rose, and watch over you. I knew he was looking out for you," he whispered, hugging me again. I teared up, and agreed with him. Mason was there, helping me escape and find safety.

I blanked out again once I thought of the night I escaped. It happened throughout the whole night, when one thing would lead to another memory.

By the end of the night, I had talked to everyone, and even laughed a bit with Adrian and Sydney who were going to be getting married in the next year too. I was happy for them.

And they, along with everyone else, were happy for me and Dimitri. I forgot to mention what happened with Dimitri because everyone went silent when I kissed Dimitri on the lips and hugged him.

"Umm, someone forgot to mention something important," Adrian announced breaking the silence. I blushed heavily and looked at him.

"If I didn't tell you something, then it's meant to stay that way," I replied, smiling at him innocently.

"Okay no, if you and Dimitri get married then that makes you my cousin-in-law, which means we would be related, which means-" Christian paled and made a disgusted face. "Yuck."

Lissa slapped him in the back of his head and smiled encouraging at me. I smiled back and rested my head on Dimitri's chest, closing my head.

This simple gesture helped me forget the bad things because he was so good that it encased me solely in the good times I've had with him. I thought about the first time I met him and giggled.

"What's so funny Milaya?" He whispered, leaning down. I turned in his arms and rested the palms of my hands on his chest. I felt slightly bipolar from the different mood swings I was going through so sue me.

"Remember the first time we met?" I asked giggling again.

He chuckled and nodded before replying with, "little miss clumsy."

"I was not! It was one time!" I replied, hitting his chest.

"Sure Roza," he whispered, pecking my lips.

I sat with him on the couch with the others around us. My mom was beside me on my dad's lap and she held my head softly in her. I knew she needed to feel me with her right now, just like I needed the same with her and everyone else.

"You haven't been home?" I asked shocked. All of them shook their heads in denial. I frowned, knowing they weren't leaving because I was here.

"You guys need to go home; you don't have to stay here because of me!" I told them sternly. They looked like they were about to argue but I stopped them. "I'm not going anywhere, I will be here tomorrow."

I guess they must feel distrustful because they denied my words with their eyes. I frowned knowing why they felt this way. I had disappeared twice, who knows if something could happen to me again?

Tears filled my eyes and I looked away as I was overcome with memories; except they were recent, not from the past. Maybe Nathan was right, could there be guys following me? Would I be here tomorrow?

What if something happens to me because I get sucked in to the past so bad that I do something crazy? I wouldn't do that, would I?

"I think it's time to go home, how about you?" Eddie said, looking at me closely before eyeing the rest of the group. Everyone nodded and stood up.

"Thank you," I mouth to Eddie and he nods and kisses my head before grabbing Mia's hand. Adrian does the same thing and I give Sydney and hug before they also start to leave.

My dad and mom stand up and pull me into a tight hug together, enveloping me in their safe cocoons. They kiss my cheeks and just stare at me for a while longer before walking out of the door.

"Where are Jeremiah and Doreene?" I asked, shocked as I realize that they weren't here when I came downstairs.

"They had to leave back to their hotels to pack. You were supposed to leave tomorrow." Lissa replied sadly, "they said they would come by tomorrow before they leave."

I nodded, wondering how I that conversation would go. I felt horrible because I knew I wouldn't be going back with them. I was going to miss all of them so much.

"You can come over at any time tomorrow Rose, remember that," Lissa whispered, giving me a hug. I kissed her cheek and nodded. "I missed you sis."

"I missed you too sis," I replied, backing away. She kissed my cheek like I did hers and walked me and Dimitri to the door.

I walked with Dimitri towards Christian's truck, reminding myself to find my car and use it next time so I wouldn't have to keep using his. Dimitri held my hand in his grasp as he drove and I grimaced at the silence.

I decided to talk to Dimitri so my mind wouldn't wander, but my words didn't take me to far away. "I'm scared of going to sleep."

I was being blunt but it was needed. Dimitri turned his head towards me and looked at me sympathetically. He didn't say anything knowing I had more to say.

"I'm going to think about what happened if I sleep. I don't want to go through that. They are already destroying my mind during the day; I can't watch them at night too." I told him, shivering slightly.

"It's going to take time Rose," he simply replied, kissing my hand.

"What if I go crazy?"

He froze, staring out the window.

"You won't."

"It could happen, Dimitri."

He got out of the car and I saw that we were at my house. Opening my door, he grabbed my hand and helped me out. He didn't speak until we were inside.

"Roza, I will do everything to make sure that doesn't happen. I love you, and will stand right here every single day of forever if it means helping you through this. You won't go crazy because I will make sure to keep you sane."

I gave him a small smile and wrapped my arms around his waist. We stood there for a while, breathing in the others embrace. I hoped he was right. I really did.

**One Week Later**

_I screamed again as the knife carved a line in my skin, bringing lines of unseen blood across my skin. I felt myself become weaker as more blood drained from my body._

_"Don't sleep Rosie, more fun awaits you." Nathan whispered in my ear before kissing my lips disgustingly and pushing his tongue in making me gage. His hands caressed my body and it made me feel dirtier._

_Nathan pulled back and started placing kissed all over me as he moved inside of me. Fear and pain attacked my body and he severely raped me again. I lost count of the many times he has done dirty things to me. He was a monster and every second I wanted to die._

_I closed my eyes as he finished and only opened them again when I heard the door slam shut and lock._

_Why did I deserve to live in this hell? I want to die._

_I want to die now._

"Rose," I gasped as I woke and automatically covered my body. Tears fell down my face as I came back to the present and vile rose in my throat.

Racing towards the bathroom, I immediately threw up in the toilet, choking up the small bits of food I've actually eaten in the past week. Dimitri held my hair as I dry heaved before I leaned back into his chest and cried.

This has happened every morning, the next morning always worse than the last. I woke up with horrible nightmares of Nathan raping and attacking me, only to wake up and throw up. I felt so _dirty. _

It was hard letting people touch me now. Dimitri was the only exception.

My memories attacked me worse than the first night. I really thought I could take on the memories, but it made me realize how disgusting I was, and what happened to me was going to stay with me for the rest of my life.

I was abused and used countless time, pushed back like a piece of trash. I really wanted death at times, wanting to get away from myself and my body.

I was disgusting.

I was useless.

I was-

"Roza, stop and remember what I told you." Dimitri stated sternly, gripping my arms to my side as I struggled to get to the shelf above me which held the 'oh-so-dear' razor that I needed.

I struggled more but listened to his words and bit my lip hard as I started thinking about my parents, Lissa, Christian, Sydney, Adrian, Eddie, Mia, Doreene, John, Jeremiah, Lucas, Blane, and Dimitri, always Dimitri.

I breathed out and stopped my struggling. I had to think of them, I couldn't do this to them. I couldn't do this to Dimitri, I loved him.

I fell back onto Dimitri and cried into his chest as my thoughts became my own again. We sat there breathing hard for a while before I turned around.

"It's getting worse," I whispered brokenly.

"Rose-"

"No, Dimitri, stop saying 'it will get better', because it sure as hell isn't!" I exclaimed, getting up and leaving the bathroom. I heard Dimitri sigh and get up also, following me out of the room.

I felt guilty for taking it out on him when he was only trying to help but my feelings were all over the place at the moment.

Dimitri and I had started training four days ago and that was the time that I would use my anger towards Nathan and the pain he caused and turn it into adrenaline or fuel when I needed to release everything. It made me forget my life for at least a little while.

He was also helping me fight against the memories, and creating a mental block so I couldn't be affected by them as I am now. He was helping me fight physically and mentally against my past and I pay him back by yelling at him.

I was a horrible person.

"I'm sorry Rose," he started, sitting on my bed as I paced.

"I hate this," I cry bitterly, "I will never live a normal life!"

I looked at him sitting on the bed, and I raced towards the bathroom again as I remembered myself lying on the hard mattress from the warehouse as my blood laid around me.

"I'm hopeless," I whispered, sinking down on the cold, tiled floor. Dimitri sat down beside me and pulled me into his lap.

"You're not hopeless Milaya," he whispered, kissing my forehead. I turn and kiss his lips tenderly, stopping myself from wincing in panic. I might have said that Dimitri was the exception to the touching rule, but it was still hard for me to kiss him.

"Come on, let's get you some food and then we can train some." Dimitri whispered, picking me up and carrying me to my room.

I allowed him to get me some clothes before he walked out without a word. I changed, not allowing my eyes to look over my scars as I pulled my shirt down.

Walking into the kitchen, Dimitri had a glass of hot chocolate and fresh pancakes on a plate in front of me. I drank the hot chocolate, but only ate one of the pancakes.

"Rose, you have to eat," Dimitri said, pushing the plate back towards me. I frowned and shook my head wearily, knowing if I ate any more I would be sick.

I had no appetite lately, every time I tried to eat Nathan's face would pop in my head and I would throw it all back up. It was a painful experience and made me decide to just stop eating period.

Dimitri sighed unhappily and took the plate away from me. I stood up and walked towards the living room, putting my shoes on as I waited for Dimitri by the door. Once he showed up, I opened the door and walked outside.

I looked at my car, smiling as I raked my hand over the front of it. Sighing, I walked towards the front and started stretching automatically. Dimitri did the same beside.

I remember the first day we started training, when he asked why I wanted to do it. I told him that I didn't want to feel weak and useless ever again, and I wanted to feel powerful and strong. Dimitri took that answer in easily and nodded in acceptance.

Popping back into the present, I noticed Dimitri waiting for me and we started running. Every time I would start thinking about Nathan or get a memory, I would run faster and harder, telling me that I was stronger and would never let myself go through the torture again.

Sometimes I would even see a hallucination of Nathan standing in front of me, and instead of cowering in fear, I would start punching the air where he was standing until he disappeared, it was the step in the right direction, no matter how crazy it looked.

When we were done, Dimitri grabbed the gloves he brought and the pads before handing them to me. I wrapped my hands in the gauze that was in the gloves before placing the gloves firmly on my hands. Dimitri held his hands out with the pads and let me hit them as much as I wanted.

He knew this was the time that I would let all my anger and grief out, and I think it helped. I think.

Once I released the tension from my body, he showed me different techniques and forms. He would also give me a sequence of hits to perform. When we were done with the gloves, he started showing me defensive moves if an attacker was holding me. I pictured Nathan behind me instead of Dimitri holding me so I couldn't move and I froze.

"Don't freeze Rose, fight him," Dimitri's voice barked tightening his hold on me. I couldn't do it though, I only slumped forward, giving up, "stop giving up, do you really want him to see you weak and useless. Show him the strong Rose Hathaway."

I finally gathered all of the hatred I had for Nathan and thought about all of the moves Dimitri has taught me in the past few days before elbowing his side hard and bringing my head up so it smashed with his nose. When his arms slumped, I grabbed one arm and spun around, twisting his arm so it could be broken with one more move. Dimitri used a move I have never seen before and got out of my grasp quickly, throwing a punch towards my head which I ducked and used a series of punches and jabs on his stomach, smiling as I heard Nathan's voice gasp in pain.

"Rose," I gasped, blinking my eyes. I focused in on Dimitri's, not Nathan's, face and realized what I had just done. Dimitri's nose was obviously broken and blood was flooding from it quickly.

"Oh Dimitri, I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed, touching his face softly. Dimitri winced but grabbed my hands anyways and held them.

"Don't worry Rose, I was expecting this," he replied, kissing my hands which I realized were bruised and red with blood too.

"Let's go inside and get you cleaned up," I whispered, dragging him towards the front door and into the kitchen. I grabbed a washcloth and wet it with warm water before cleaning his face off tenderly. When I wiped up the remaining blood, Dimitri's grabbed the rag and cleaned it off in the sink before grabbing my hands and doing the same thing.

"How did you feel?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?" I replied, looking up at him confused.

"You just physically beat up a trainer that has had years of experience, with barely a few scratches. I think anyone would be scared to mess with you." He replied smiling, making me smile back.

"I felt invincible, like I could take on any one." I replied, feeling a flood of warmth encase me. "I didn't feel weak!" I exclaimed, throwing my arms around him. He laughed and hugged me back, kissing my hair.

"You see Rose, there is no need to be scared of Nathan or those memories, and you are stronger than all of them and can overcome them no matter what you think." He said, looking down on me. I bit my lips and smiled softly.

"I'll get through this," I told him confidently, shoving the words I said earlier in the trash.

"That's my girl," Dimitri whispered, kissing my lips softly. I didn't feel the need to flinch away and smiled into the kiss. "How about we both take showers and head over the Lissa's."

"Sounds good," I replied, "you can go first." He nodded and kissed me once more before walking towards my room. I was almost there, when I heard my phone start the ring. I turned around and grabbed the phone off of the receiver hesitantly. I was still a tad bit scared to be answering phones because I was scared Nathan would be on the line.

"Hello?"

"Ah Rose! I didn't know if the rumors were true, but I don't think my ears are deceiving me." I smiled when I realized that it was Victor Dashkov, my old boss from Spirit Magazine.

"Victor," I replied, "it's good to hear from you!"

"Might I say welcome back," he replied in his deep tenor.

"Thank you," I conceded, sitting down.

"Hmm, I think this might call for a celebration!" He replied, and I heard him clap his hands in the background.

"Everything calls for a celebration Uncle Victor," I told him, shaking my head.

"Well this even more so! How about you come by tomorrow and I can have everyone here to welcome you back. It could be like a welcome back party!" I laughed and took in the double meaning of his words.

"Uncle Victor, I don't work for you anymore, so how will it be a welcome back party?" I told him confused.

He laughed and said, "Well that is where my proposition becomes clear. Would you like to come back and work for me?"

I froze, was he serious?

"Are you serious?" I whispered shocked.

"Why of course my dear, you are one of the best photographers this company has ever known!" He stated joyfully.

"I-I might have to think about it Victor, I don't think I would be able to come back and work so soon, after what happened that is," I told him truthfully, hoping he wouldn't be upset.

"Take your time and think about it, but you can still come and see everyone tomorrow! It will be a great surprise!"

"I guess that won't hurt," I replied lightly.

"Great! So will 5 work?" He asked quickly, I nodded my head, and then realized he couldn't see me.

"Of course Victor, I will be there," I told him.

"Splendid! I must go now, one of the girls are calling in about a feature on clothes again." He stated sighing. I said my goodbyes just as Dimitri walked into the room drying his hair with a towel.

"Who was that?" He asked, looking at my shocked expression.

"Victor Dashkov," I stated, staring at him. He raised an eyebrow in question, "Victor was my old boss from the magazine. He is Lissa's uncle."

"Oh, what did he need?"

"He invited me to a welcome back party tomorrow," I told him biting my lip.

"And…" He said, knowing I was hiding more.

"He also offered me my old job back."

Dimitri stared at me astonished before smiling brightly. "Are you going to-"

"I don't know yet, I can't just go back there, I can't work right now and it would me being away from you, and I can't do that yet," I whispered, getting up and walking towards him. He opened his arms and pulled me in comfortingly.

"I understand Roza," he whispered, kissing my forehead. "Now go shower and I will wait out here." I nodded my head and walked towards the bathroom to quickly have a shower.

Once I finished, Dimitri was waiting for the door like he said and we quickly left to go to Lissa's. When we were driving, I thought about John and Doreene again, saddened by the thought of them being a state away.

I told them that I would visit as much as I could and I called them every day. I even talked to Jeremiah, Lucas, and Blane when they were working. Lucas told me that he and Eliza were getting more anxious for the wedding which was supposed to be held in a month. He asked if I was still going and I told him of course I was.

Blane, not surprisingly, has gotten into more trouble at the farm, and John made him rake the cow manure for the past week. Doreene told me that she and John missed me and told me that I always had a home with them.

I felt like crying again.

I cleared my throat when Dimitri looked over and he gave me a soft smile. "Homesick?" I nodded my head, not surprised of how in tune he was to my thoughts. He knew me so well.

"You could have gone back with them Rose, it wouldn't have made any of us mad." He replied, giving me a look. I shook my head fiercely and frowned.

"I can't leave you again, any of you. I just got you back. I will visit John and Doreene as much as I can but my home is here with you guys." Dimitri smiled at my words and kissed my cheek before telling me that we were here.

I walked into Lissa's house and saw Lissa sitting at the table, frustratingly looking at pictures in front of her. I walked up behind her before pointing to the pink wildflowers.

Lissa looked up and smiled, nodding her head before picking the picture up and placing it in the _keep _folder.

"Thanks Rose," she said, shaking her head in exasperation. I chuckled and looked around the room.

"Where's sparky?"

"Sleeping, I made him stay up all night picking out alter arrangements." I shook my head at her, looking away as I smiled.

"Didn't you have most of this picked out…_before?"_ I said, biting my lip again.

Lissa cleared her throat awkwardly before replying, "yes, but this is a new season which means a different wedding!"

I shook my head at her and grabbed Dimitri's hand as he sat down next me. Lissa smiled over at Dimitri tiredly before gesturing towards the open kitchen. "Help yourselves to breakfast."

"We already ate Liss but thank you," I replied, stopping Dimitri's rant. He glared at me before mumbling the same reply. Lissa didn't notice anything as she started looking at other pictures.

"Lissa stop, you're going to give yourself a brain tumor," I told her, grabbing her things and pushing them across the table.

"Rose!" Lissa whined, hitting me softly. I smiled and turned her so she was looking at me.

"It's going to be perfect no matter what so stop complaining." I told her, before grabbing her and standing up. "Guess who I got a call from this morning."

"Who?" She asked interested as she finally stopped worrying about her wedding details.

"You Uncle Victor, he offered me my job back and told me to come to the welcome back party he was planning," I replied rolling my eyes. Lissa's eyes widened in shock and she hugged me excitedly.

"Oh that's great Rose!"

"I told him I didn't know about the job offer though," I stated, looking at her softly. She smiled and nodded her head sympathetically.

"I wonder what made him do it," Lissa mused, looking out the window.

"Me too," I replied, thinking over the reasons. It was a very good question.

**NPOV**

"Come on you Neanderthal, we don't have that long before they realize we are gone." I spat, hitting me man with the back of my hand. He hurriedly tried to fit the key in before turning it and opening it.

_Ahh, sweet freedom. _I breathed, grinning sadistically at the land in front of me. A black car was waiting beside us and I got into the passenger seat as the dimwit beside me fumbled with the car key again.

"Hurry up!"

He finally, got the engine running and sped onto the road before letting us disappear from view of the station. Thank _God. _I thought I was never going to get out of there. I had things to do, revenge to plan.

"I need you to take me to him." I stated, glaring at the boy beside me. He gulped and stared at me wide eyed.

"He- He only told me to get you out and take you to the safe location."

"I don't care, go." I spat, glaring at him. He made a quick right turn and I smiled. Oh Rosie, I'm so close to seeing you again, and then I will make sure you don't ever remember me again. I don't need another seven years of prison.

Plan one complete.

Let plan two commence.

**Dun Dun Dunnnnnn...ha let plan 2 commence...I wonder if anyone figures out that the plan is partly inside of the story...hmmm :/ I guess I will never know unless you review!:) Please review and tell me what you think! I'm hoping to get to 500 or higher by the end of the story:)**


	34. Chapter 34

**Not alot of reviews but I'll work with it! Thank you to the people who did review and I really wanted to get this chapter out because after this chapter there will be one more and than the epilogue! :) ENJOY**

**DPOV**

It was hard watching Rose go through pain, especially when I can't stop it from happening. I want to drag the memories out of her head and tear them to shreds, but that's impossible. It was pure agony watching her reach for the razor every single morning, even though after the first night I had taken it out without her knowing.

She was in so much pain, that she was willing to take her own life.

I couldn't bear watching it, but I wasn't leaving any time soon. I made a promise to her and myself that I would stay by her side and never leave her.

I wasn't breaking that promise anytime soon.

The only thing that made me feel useful was when I trained her. Whenever she looked relieved or happy that she was accomplishing something made me feel ecstatic that I was helping her in some way. She fought back, for the first time today. Of course, she cowered, and she even gave up for a split second, but I wasn't having any of it.

I would take any pain that she put on me, because it was nothing compared to what she was going through.

The first night, I laid beside her, coaxing her to sleep. Her fear was keeping her awake, but I knew that exhaustion would come at some point, so I stayed with her until it did. I couldn't go to sleep, however, scared that something would happen to her if I left.

The screams that she gave during the time she was remembering her memories of the kidnapping haunted me. I was scared of hearing it again, wanting to stop it from happening again.

That first time, she started thrashing and screaming, reliving a terrible nightmare. When I finally got through to her and woke her up, she frantically pushed me away and cowered from me. I couldn't touch her without her screaming.

She started getting weary around me after that, every time I touched her, she flinched. Lissa tried to hug her, but Rose started hyperventilating. Adrian, enthusiastically, greeted her with a hug and she screamed and ran from him.

After about 5 days, she got used to me again. The others were a different story, but I was happy that she was actually responding to me. I noticed her hold back a flinch when I finally kissed her today and tried not to grimace.

I had a lot to think over every day, and usually I spent my nights in her room doing just that. I would think about ways of helping her, and I would think about choking Nathan with my bare hands until he took back all of the things he has done to her, but he couldn't change the past, and I hated him for that.

The police called three days ago, asking about Rose. I told them that she has regained her memories, but she was in no way ready to be interrogated. The understood but told him that it would have to be soon. I was scared to tell Rose that, and hopefully wouldn't have to for another two weeks.

She held a good front to everyone. She would hide her emotions and pain behind a mask during the day, hoping to look strong to Lissa and her parents, but I saw her let down that mask at night and early morning. She wasn't getting any better, and bottling up her emotions and thoughts was only making it worse. I could see her eyes turn blank when she was overcome by an unknown memory, and her mind was only showing her reruns of the horrible pictures of her past.

She was making herself crazy. I hated to say it, but she was being tortured by her own mind and at some point she will explode. I was waiting for it to happen any day now.

She was also making herself sick. She stopped eating normally and the little food she did eat was later thrown up. She couldn't keep living like this, because she could put herself in the hospital quickly.

I was scared, so very scared for Roza. I wanted to tear for hair out and sob my heart out as I listen to her scream and cry. I loved her so much, but I couldn't protect her. It was a cruel, cruel world.

My Roza, my love, my soul-mate was the only thing left holding me to this life. I would do anything for her, and take a bullet for her if I had to.

The phone with her old boss had me on edge. Who would hire their old worker back after she had been brutally abused and raped, also accounted missing with amnesia for several weeks and then found again only to recount all of her memories of her kidnapping and kidnapper and in turn becoming mentally unstable to do anything at this moment in time.

No one, which is why I think there, is something going on with this Victor Dashkov guy. It doesn't feel right, and I had a very bad feeling about going to the welcome back party he has planned.

**RPOV**

"Are you sure that you want to go with me Dimitri?" I said, looking at him through the mirror I was standing in front of. He walked closer and put his hands on my shoulders rubbing them back and forth.

"It would pain me to see you go by yourself, I'm not leaving your side anytime soon." He replied, tracing a scar that was on my forearm. I retraced the thought of how I had gotten it and shivered making him stop his hand. "Sorry."

I shook off the sharp onslaught of images, pushing the urge to cry out of my head. _I wasn't going to be weak, I'm not weak._ I murmured to myself inside of my head.

I was going crazy, I knew I was. It didn't matter what Dimitri said because the images would never leave my head. They were on repeat 24/7, never stopping and always keeping a large amount of pain and weakness inside of me.

I cleared my throat and turned around, giving him a timid smile. "It's okay, how about we get going before we are late."

"Roza," Dimitri said stopping me, "are you sure you will be okay tonight?"

Sighing, I closed my eyes and shook my head, "I will never be okay, but I won't let him ruin my life. I won't," I told him strongly, feeling the words burn through my soul.

"I will be by your side the whole time, if you need to leave, tell me and we will," he said slowly. The look in his eyes said he didn't want me going at all, but he was trying to support my decisions as best as he could.

A headache was starting to form again, and I wanted it to go away. I was trying so hard to block all of the bad thoughts out of my head and I was starting to get tired.

"Okay," I agreed turning and walking towards the door. He followed right behind me and shut the door, locking it firmly. It took us an hour to get to the office, and as we pulled into our parking lot, I couldn't help but stare at the building in fear and happiness.

Dimitri grabbed my hand, but I could barely feel the touch. I was assaulted with memories from the times that I worked here and was hesitant to go inside again. It was still light outside, which gave me the sight to look at the top floor which held the large sign that I remembered seeing through my hotel window a week ago.

Biting my lip, I walked inside, my body slightly hidden behind Dimitri. I heard something that sounded like clicking as I walked inside of the reception area that I remembered so well.

"I'm sorry sir, but we are closing right now," a familiar voice said from in front of us. I could picture the small blonde in my mind and smiled slightly, though it felt more like a grimace than anything.

"I know, we are here for-"

"Natalie," I interrupted, steeping in front of Dimitri. Dimitri stepped back, so I could see the girl in front of me clearly. Her eyes widened as I stepped into view and she hurriedly stood up in shock.

"Oh my gosh, Rose!" She exclaimed, running around the desk. I closed my eyes as her arms went around me, stiffening at the contact. If she noticed, she didn't say anything because she pulled back with a grin on her face. I tried returning it but it was useless. "I can't believe it's really you!"

"It's really me," I murmured, throwing my hair up in front of my scar. The dress I was wearing had long sleeves, but only went to knees so anyone could see the marks on the bottom of my legs and around my ankles.

"I missed you so much Rose! My dad has been talking about you all day," she said, gesturing wildly with her hands.

"I missed you too Natalie," I replied before I remembered the person connected to the hand I was holding, "Natalie, I want you to meet Dimitri Belikov. Dimitri this is Natalie Dashkov, Victors daughter and Lissa's cousin."

"Nice to meet you Natalie," Dimitri said, shaking her hand. She blushed, shaking his hand before giving me a sly look.

"Nice to meet you too Dimitri," she replied easily. Glancing at her computer, she cursed and turned towards us again.

"Everyone is waiting for you upstairs," she said, motioning us to follow her as she marched towards the elevators. We followed her quick footsteps, hastily trying to keep up. I was still trying to wrap my head around _everyone _being there. I felt like I was going to be overwhelmed, and might take Dimitri up on his offer of leaving early.

Once we were in the elevator, she clicked the top floor before she started talking of anything and everything. Her mindless chatter wasn't helping the headache I had, but I didn't want to say anything to her.

I breathed out in relief and panic when the elevator announced our arrival. Natalie walked out first, and then I followed with Dimitri stuck right to my side.

Natalie actually stayed silent as she led us down the hall, and I wondering if we were even going in the right direction when chatter picked up in front of us. I took a deep breath as we came closer and another fear popped up in my head.

_What if they hug me? I will surely go crazy if I'm surrounded by a group of hugging people. I'm going to freak out to my ex-co-workers, I just know it and then everyone will know that I was crazy._

"Breathe Rose," Dimitri whispered, squeezing my hand. I held it tighter, holding onto the thoughts of him, Lissa, and the good things in my life right now. I couldn't go crazy if I thought about them.

Once I walked into the room, the noise level dropped down by a large margin. Instantly, I blushed and looked down, cowering beneath my brown hair. I heard somebody whisper something, and then also heard people shuffling their feet.

"Ah my dear, don't hide that pretty face of yours! May I be the first to say to you, welcome back Rose," I looked up at the man in front of me and smiled just as the room erupted in clapping. Victor stepped closer and reached out his hand which I slipped mine into, letting him reach up and kiss it.

"It's great to be here," I said, smiling at some of the people here. My statement might have been a little untruthful, but nobody needed to know that.

"I'm glad! Everyone is dying to welcome you back so I will only take up a small piece of your time, but I hope to talk to you again sometime again tonight Rosemarie!" He replied giving me a you-know-why look.

I nodded and said, "Of course Victor."

Once he had walked away, some of the staff that I worked with down in the photography department walked up to me and started talking. I introduced them to Dimitri who just smiled and stood by my side like a body guard. He seemed a little on edge which made me slightly nervous given I haven't seen him like this before.

"Dimitri, are you alright?" I asked once we had a minute alone. His eyes stopped moving around the room long enough to give me a reassuring smile.

"Yes Roza, I guess I'm just a little out of place," he replied vaguely. I eyed him, knowing that he was lying but didn't push it.

"Don't worry Dimitri, I feel the same way. I just feel like I don't fit in with these people anymore. I'm too different than what I once was." I said sadly, anger flaming up as I thought about the person who made that possible. Thinking about him however made me lose focus on blocking my thoughts so I was hit with images that I really didn't want to see.

"Shh, Roza, breathe," Dimitri whispered, trying to break me out of my thoughts. I bit my lip and closed my eyes thinking about all of my friends and him so I could push the images back again. "Good job Rose."

I realized that my eyes were watering and that some people were glancing over at us. I controlled my breathing before dabbing my eyes with the sleeve of my dress. I felt Dimitri kiss my forehead and I thought about all of the times that he would stay with me before all of this happened.

We had been close then too, but neither of us had admitted to the other how close we really were. I smiled up at him and whispered the words that he hadn't heard in a while truthfully. "I love you."

His smile was breath-taking as he tucked my hair behind my ear and whispered, "I love you too Roza," back.

"You know you're the only one keeping me sane, right?" I whispered honestly, looking up at him sadly. He grimaced, shaking his head sadly.

"You aren't going to go crazy Rose," he murmured breathing out harshly.

"No one can predict the future Dimitri," I replied smiling sadly. His eyes turned pained and he heard the truth in my words and I could feel him grip me tighter to him.

"I wish this never happened," he whispered in my ear, breathing out again shakily. I close my eyes to stop myself from crying and pull back.

"Over anything else, that is what I wish for every day," I said my voice cracking. I took a few steps back before saying, "I'm going to go to the bathroom real quick. I won't be long."

He looked at me hesitantly before letting me go. I touched his arm sympathetically, knowing he couldn't come with me. Walking off, I saw Lissa and Christian talking to Natalie. All three of them smiled and waved, and I did the same before walking out of the door.

After I was done in the bathroom, I walked out, my face fresh again after my crying fit and my mind as controlled as it could be. I turned the corner and ran right into Natalie who was jogging towards it anxiously.

"Oh, there you are Rose. Daddy said he wanted to talk to you," she said expectantly. I bit my lip, knowing I would have to talk to him sooner or later.

"Okay Natalie, thank you for telling me," I told her starting to walk back in the direction of the party. Natalie grabbed my arm and I flinched from the unexpected contact.

"No Rose, he is in his office, I'll walk you over there." She stated, starting to walk in the opposite direction. I looked behind me, in dire need of going back to Dimitri before I exploded. I haven't been away from him this long. He was the only thing keeping the bad memories away.

I frowned, turning back around and jogging after Natalie who was waiting for me impatiently. My frown deepened at her attitude as I started walking behind her. I gulped silently, panicking for the utter loneliness I felt and the weak mind set I had from it.

Without knocking, Natalie walked right in, gesturing for me to come in. I did so, looking around the vast office, my eyes landing on Victor immediately.

"Ah my dear, I've been waiting for you," Victor barked out happily, rubbing his hands together. I bit my lip as I heard the door close behind me. I didn't like the look Victor was giving me right now, I didn't like it one bit.

"Is this about your offer?" I asked stiffly, my posture rigid as I stood in front of his desk. He grinned but it wasn't a welcoming one.

"Yes, have you thought about it any?"

I shivered, feeling a cold breeze enter the room, and felt like I had walked into something bad. Dimitri did have a reason to feel anxious.

I felt slightly panicked, my mind rushing through images and possible scenarios, already expecting the worse. What I was feeling was the same as the night I got pulled into the van.

"I h-have Victor, but I'm sorry, I can't come back and work for you." I whispered, shaking.

"My, that's too bad," he whispered sadly, shaking his head, though my words didn't seem to faze him, like he already knew my answer.

_Why did he make that job offer than, what was he thinking? _

"Yes it is," I replied breathlessly, flinching from the harsh images flashing through my head. I needed Dimitri.

"There is another option though, my nephew is in need of a worker, actually, I really think you two have met before if I'm not mistaken…" he trailed off and smirk layering his face.

My breathing was getting quicker once I felt another person behind me and I was a second away from screaming in fear. _What's happening! What's going on! _I screamed inside of my head.

"Oh, Uncle, I assure you, Rosie and I are very good friends."

I was screaming now, the only problem was…it wasn't coming out. I was frozen tight in fear, my body wanting to hunch over as it gets attacked with pain and images…memories that I had tried to lock up were released, hitting me and punching me as it traveled around my mind. I wanted to scream but was I was having so much of a panic attack and a memory relapse that I was second away from blacking out from loss of air.

Nathan walked around me so he was in my line of sight, standing right beside his…Uncle.

"Y-You-"I couldn't get the words out.

"I-I'm supposed to be in jail?" He mimicked, tapping his chin. "I don't think so; those lousy guards do not do their job very well. This dimwit took a while getting me out, I could have done it better myself but," he waved his hand off as if to say 'oh well'.

I didn't know who he was talking about until he walked around me also and stood in the corner of the room beside none other than Natalie. Another jolt ran through me and I recognized the boy standing there.

Jesse.

"Now Rosie, I went through a lot of things to get you back, you won't run from mw will you?" Nathan said smoothly as if talking to a baby. I didn't even realize that I took a step back.

Without thinking, I started taking more steps, wanting to get as far away from this as I could. I was literally going crazy trying to stay sane.

My arms were grabbed immediately and pulled behind my back making me cry out in pain. Jesse walked be forward until we were right in front of him. Nathan grinned, leaning forward and running his hand down face. Panic erupted inside of me and loud sobs escaped my body as I struggled to get away from him. He only grinned and grabbed my forearms tightly, tugging me forward so I was right in front of him.

He moved his hand as he walked around me, slowly pressing his chest against my back. I continued crying and thrashing against his hold.

"Now Rose, there are a lot of things that I want to do with you, but I think that time is over for now. You had your chance to play nice and you ran away…tsk tsk, you got me put in a jail cell. Now I hear that you remember it all…well I can't let that happen can I? But there is no way to get rid of your memories ago, so…I guess that just means getting rid of you." He whispered in my ear, venom dripping off every word.

I cried out as he pulled my left arm back harshly, feeling something pop. He had dislocated my shoulder. I cried, my panic continuing to harness through me full swing.

"And after I get rid of you, that little boyfriend of yours is next." He whispered again, his laughter echoing through my brain. My struggling stop as his words sank in.

_Dimitri, no…not Dimitri. _

His name resonated throughout my body as his face popped up inside of my mind. And for the first time that night, anger started building up in me. My breath became more controlled as I grew angrier and I felt my hands clench into fists.

"You will go nowhere near him," I growled calmly, feeling my body quivering.

"You can't stop me," he whispered.

I stomped on his foot just like I did with Dimitri yesterday, before throwing my head back and ramming it into his chin. When his grip loosened, I turned and punched him in the face, following with a knee in his groin.

Once he knelt down, I threw my fist up in an uppercut hearing something break. I stared down at him, knowing no one else was coming for me because they were in too much shock.

I felt the images come over me again, but this time, as I stare at them in my mind, I used them in anger, and fell into a dark void as I let my body get released to the anger that I held up from my past.

"Did you really think I wasn't going to fight?" I asked laughing menacingly. "You're just a puny man that should be put in hell where you belong."

I let my body talk for a few more minutes, hearing his groan sent angrier need well up in me. I heard someone come up behind me.

"Oh look, someone else wants to join the party," I sang, turning around and blocking the punch Jesse sent me before sending him to the ground with a series of kicks and punches of my own. He was out in seconds.

"Oh, you thought this was going to be easy?" I laughed hard at the expression on his face, sending a hard kick into his face.

"Poor poor Nathan, they are coming for you next," I whispered, getting down in his ear. "All of the pain you caused to me and mommy dearest is all going to fall on your pretty head."

More laughter pulsed through my body and I turned in a circle. I looked over at Victor who was standing in the corner with Natalie. "Oh are you scared Victor? You brought yourself into this mess; you deserve to go die with Nathan too! It can be a party!" I laughed again, and turned towards his desk, touching all of the things he had. I opened a compartment on his desk and clapped my hands as I saw the object.

"Oh this will come in handy indeed…" I whispered happily.

"You crazy bitch," Nathan bit out, standing up shakily. I shook my head at him, my lips pursed.

"Crazy Nathan? Oh you should have seen that one coming! I'm not crazy; I just want you to see how angry you caused me. I didn't like remembering those bad things Nathan and you need to feel exactly what I felt." I said walking forward and bringing the knife up. I heard a loud bang in the distance but only kept my eyes on Nathan.

He sneered at me, looking at the knife wearily. I was so set on him that the next loud bang didn't even register in my head. I rushed forward with the knife and Nathan punched me in the stomach but I could barely feel it because I was slashing his arms at the same time. He screamed and I stabbed him again in the chest pushing him down.

I didn't hear the person behind me until it was too late; I was tackled to the floor, the knife sliding away from me out of my grasp. I struggled underneath the person, screaming and yelling at him to get off.

I was too lost in my mind to actually think about what was happening or who was on me. I just needed to be released so I could finish my job.

"Let me go! He needs to die!" I screeched, elbowing the person in the side. I heard him grunt but held on strong. Other people started coming into the room, and all I could see was blue uniforms and guns. I started shaking, my anger flaring as I glared at the unconscious bastard in front of me.

"Rose, stop now! You did enough already calm down! Listen to my voice and breathe this isn't you, listen to me Roza!" The person yelled in my ear. My glaring dimmed slightly as I recognized the voice that sounded so far away. I felt my anger fade faster as a name clicked with the voice.

"D-Dimitri," I panted, continuing to thrash lightly.

"Yes baby, stop fighting me now," he whispered his grip loosening. I felt myself start to shake hard and my head was twitching back and forth. I didn't feel him lift me, but I was soon staring into his eyes which has widened considerably.

I closed my eyes trying to clear my head of the vicious thoughts consuming me, my anger was completely gone now and the only thing left was panic and fear…of me. I didn't know what happened to me or what was happening to me, but all I knew is that I tried to kill a man.

"What's wrong with her, why is she shaking like that?" A male voice that I didn't recognize asked. My hand shot up and gripped my hair as I thought about the crime I had just committed. I wasn't even aware of my own body; I was lost inside of my mind.

_I had gone crazy…I was crazy. _A small voice whispered in my head. Tears started leaking from my eyes as I finally pushed the dark clouds away from my mind, freeing myself from the images that once pained me. Now they only caused me excessive anger and craziness.

"I think she is having a panic attack," Dimitri stated as I felt my body being set down. I opened my eyes, looking wildly around me. When did I get _outside_?

"Dimitri," I whispered, crying as I reached for him.

"I'm here baby, I'm here," He whispered, smoothing my hair back. "Milaya I need you to take a deep breath, can you do that for me?" I nodded my head, focusing on my breathing as I breathed in deeply. My shaking stopped slightly but I couldn't get it to go away completely.

I continued to even my breathing and soon I was lying there, as Dimitri stood over me, breathing evenly as I felt pain start hitting my body as well as exhaustion. I looked up at Dimitri through the slits of my eyes and started reaching for his hand. He understood and grabbed my hand.

"I'm crazy," I whispered, a tear rolling down my eyes. Dimitri looked like he was close to tears too, but he leaned forward so he could kiss my cheeks.

"You aren't crazy Rose, you had too much stress on you and got overwhelmed, it isn't your fault," he said, squeezing my hand. More tears seeped through my eyes and he wiped them away tenderly.

"Did I…Did I kill him?"

"No Milaya, he is alive, but he is going to a maximum security prison for the rest of his sorry life. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you," he murmured, resting his forehead on mine as he closed his eyes.

"You knew something was going on, I should have asked you for your opinion before I trusted past memories and followed Natalie." I whispered, before looking around. "What happened to them?"

"Victor is under arrest and Natalie got away," he replied, worry seeping through his eyes.

"And Jesse?"

"Knocked out cold, but he is alive."

"I was able to fight back because of you," I told him, looking into his eyes deeply, "your training, or the very little I had, helped me."

"I'm glad that it helped you," he whispered, kissing my forehead.

"I'm going to get better," I assured him strongly. He looked shocked that I said this before he could assure me himself.

"I know you are Milaya, and I promise, this time I will be with you every step of the way," he stated firmly, tightening his hand in mine. I reached my other hand up and ran it down his face.

"I love you Dimitri," I whispered tearfully.

He smiled sadly and kissed my lips firmly, "I love you with my whole heart Milaya."

For the first time in a long time, as the red and blue lights flashed against our faces and the unconscious body of Nathan gets rolled away, I knew that it was a turning point in my life. It was going to take a long time, but with the friends and family by my side, everything would get better.

**So, if you think I had a crazy mind set when writing this you are right. I was up late and I think I was going crazy while I wrote about Rose going crazy, but I swear I am sane now and I hope you get the emotion that I tried to put into this chapter. It really had to go this way she just had to build it up and then explode on Nathan.**

**And then he brought Dimitri into it...oh no no. You deserved to die...though I should have made him die but I figured Rose has enough on her plate at the moment. I hope you like how I am going with the ending and please erview and tell me if you love it, hate it, wish Nathan would have died, or if you think I did the right thing:)**

**Thanks everyone and review!**

**0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0**


	35. Chapter 35

**Hey everyone...so this is the lst chapter of Behind the Camera and I am very sad that it is coming to a close. I know everyone wonders how it is going to go, and I hope this satisfies your qualms. **

**I really hope you ENJOY this chapter and thank you for reading!**

**9 MONTHS LATER**

**RPOV**

It had been 9 very long months since the night of my welcome back party at Spirit Magazine. 9 months since I have truly been home, or close to it. After being in the hospital for over a month to heal my injuries-which were, surprisingly, more at the time- I had been sent to a rehabilitation center.

I had fought them about it, I didn't want to go there, but I knew, and Dimitri knew, that it would help a lot. So, sadly, I was sent there to begin what I call, a mental recovery.

It had been excruciating at the beginning, but for a different reason than everyone else thought. I was only allowed visits from family members every few weeks. The last time that I have seen any of my friends was my last day in the hospital, but the last day I saw Dimitri was the day he and my parents dropped me off at the rehabilitation center.

I was scared of being without him, and I would cry for him every night, though most of those times I thought about Lissa, Eddie, Adrian, Sydney, Christian, and Mia too. I missed all of them so much.

I had been without them for 8 months and haven't seen them in 8 months…until now.

I was glad that I had agreed to going to the center, because it helped me more than anyone could imagine. The doctors from the hospital had sent me pills to help with my panic attacks, but I haven't used them in 3 months.

I could sleep at night now, free of nightmares. Now I could dream of my friends and the love of my life. I felt happy for the first time in a long time, but I wouldn't be truly happy until I was with all of them once more.

I had made my parents tell Lissa that she needed to continue her plans for the wedding and sometimes they would bring along pictures and menus that Lissa needed help on. It helped that she was treating me like nothing was wrong with me, and I loved her all the more for it.

Though I haven't seen her in a long time, I have been keeping in contact with her and everyone else. They sent letters with my parents and I would read them every time, writing back when I was in free session with my counselor.

My parents had told me in their last visit that Lissa's wedding was coming up, which I already knew, and I talked about it with Olendski, my counselor.

Dr. Olendski is the savior that dropped down from heaven. She has been the one that has helped me since I arrived here. She has talked to me about my old life, and my friends and family. I told her Aunt Alberta and the way my parents used to be before this past year.

I told her, basically, my whole life, and when we came to the kidnapping, she would ease me through it, teaching me techniques to use whenever I would think about it. After 5 months of working with her on my insecurities and pain and fear, I could finally think about it without either of those feelings weighing on my chest.

I didn't feel crazy, I felt close to normal, and I even talk to everyone like I used to, though I try to lay off on my smart ass comments. I felt like…me again.

My life was starting to piece itself together again.

The memories that always put anger into me, didn't affect me anymore. I learned to treat them as a part of me, pushing me to be stronger and safer. It made me smarter and helped me mature more.

So, Dr. Olendski seemed to see the same thing as me, because last week, when I told her about Lissa's wedding, she dropped the bomb on me.

She said that my recovery was finished and that I could leave. I think I cried tears of joy for over an hour, just hugging her and thanking her. I was so happy, I was finally going home.

Today, my parents were picking me up. I had called them after my session with the Doc and told them what happened. I told them not to tell anyone because I wanted to surprise them, and man was I going to surprise them.

Today was in fact, Lissa's wedding. My parents were bringing me the Maid of Honor that Lissa had bought just in case I would be out before the wedding. I could almost feel her sadness that I wasn't going to be there.

I hoped that she liked my parents gift-me- because I was surely going to like being there.

Currently, my parents had just driven up and I was bouncing in my chair like the 28 year old I was. Yes, it was true that I spent my birthday here. Everyone sent me gifts and even some of the workers and the friends I had made here had made or given me something too.

"Rose," my mom exclaimed, running up to me and pulling me into a hug. I threw my arms around her, tears slipping out of my eyes.

I turned around and hugged my dad next, feeling his lips on my hair as I cried into his shoulder. "Are you glad to be leaving?"

"Hell yeah," I stated grinning up at him. He laughed and ruffled my hair like I was a child. I frowned and stuck my tongue out at him.

"Okay, you too. Rose we need to get you dressed or we won't be able to make it for the wedding." My mom said, rushing me back into the building. Dr. Olendski took me to one of the vacant rooms and allowed my mom to get to work.

The dress, thankfully, wasn't pink, but a bright red, orange, and yellow one. The colors were layered as it fell down my body as broke out into a neat crisscross pattern as it flowed out at my knees. The thin spaghetti straps had small diamonds layering it and I smiled as I slid over my body perfectly.

Of course, one of the physical trainers here allowed me to work out in the gym with the others and used the indoor track so I stayed in shape. I even practice some of the moves that Dimitri had showed me on a punching bag.

Oh Dimitri…

"Rose, your drooling," my mom stated, staring at me amused. I blushed deeply and looked down smiling, "You miss him don't you?"

"All the time," I whispered, brushing some of the hair out of my eyes, "he still doesn't know right?"

"Nope, no one but me and your father," she replied grinning.

"Good."

She started on my hair then, pulling out a curler and letting it warm up before running it through my hair. When the curls were perfected, she delicately pulled some of the top strands back so my hair was pinned half up and half down. Reaching into her bag, she picked up small white flower clips and snapped them in softly where the other pins were.

"Oh Rose, you look lovely already," she whispered, tears springing to her eyes. I grinned at her from the mirror and she sniffed before pulling out the makeup bag and telling me to sit still.

She applied only a small amount of powder, seeing as my face was already smooth and even from constant care, and start shading my eyes with oranges, red, and yellows that brought out my eyes beautifully against my tanned skin and brown eyes.

Next, she lined my eyes with liner and added some mascara, which made my eyes looked impossibly bigger and fuller. I smiled at myself through the mirror and my mom brushed blush onto my cheeks and pink gloss before stepping back.

"Beautiful," she whispered, placing her hand on my cheek. I kissed her cheeks and thanked her before we both got everything packed and walked out of the room.

My dad, who had been snoozing on the couch, jumped up and walked over to us with a bright smile on his face. He kissed my cheeks before saying I looked beautiful. We walked towards the front door to leave and I saw most of the staff waiting for us.

"Oh I'm going to miss your large wonderful appetite Rosemarie," Chef Fredrick said, winking at me. I laughed and hugged him.

"And I will miss your wonderfully made casserole," I replied smiling. He grinned at the comment before stepping back to allow the next person to step in.

"What am I going to do without your smart remarks to lighten up my day now?" Mr. Daniels said who had been the fitness coach. I tilted my head and shrugged.

"Don't worry, I can ask Doc for your number," I replied winking at him. He grimaced, an amused look in his eyes.

I said goodbye to a few of the others but my eyes started growing misty when I came up to Dr. Olendski. She tsked me and pulled me into a hug. "Your mom worked hard on you, don't mess it up with tears."

Laughing at pulled back and dabbed at my eyes, coming back to see nothing came off._ Ahh the magic of waterproof mascara and eyeliner._

"You have accomplished so much Rose, and I couldn't be more proud of you than I am now. I'm glad that I got a chance to meet and work with you Rose. No matter what, you will be the strongest girl that I have ever worked with. I hope you live your life with happiness and remember to keep in touch every now and then." She murmured making me cry again as I hugged her even harder.

"I'm going to miss you so much Doc, thank you so much. I wouldn't be here without you. My past doesn't and will never hurt me ever again because of you. Now I can remember all of the good things in my life and leave room for the ones in the future. Thank you," I whispered in her ear.

I heard her sniffle and we pulled back laughing. "Remember to call or email me to tell me how you are doing."

"I will."

With that said my parents and I got into the car and drove away. I stared at the center for a few more minutes until it disappeared from sight. I sighed and turned back around, catching my reflection in the window.

I had changed back to the person I once was.

It took 45 minutes to get to the chapel where the wedding was being held, my parents were already dressed in their tux and dress and I was informed that Lissa asked my dad if he would walk her down in the aisle. I was so happy that my family connected so well with my parents since I was gone.

We pulled around back where the dressing rooms were. It was a fairly large church. I stepped out of the car, breathing in the fresh air as I took in the new change in environment.

"Okay Rose," my mom whispered, after looking inside to check if the coast in clear. I walked inside quickly and my mom told me that Lissa's room was three doors over. I breathed out before smiling and walking towards the open door.

The sight I saw was magnificent; Lissa was standing by the window looking out it longingly. I didn't realize she was talking to someone until that someone walked out of a closet in a closely related dress as mine, along with another girl.

"I wish she was here," Lissa whispered longingly. I smiled at her tone of voice, wanting to talk to her now.

"We wish she was here too," Mia replied also with the same amount of longing.

"We are going to have to take pictures and send them to her," Sydney said giggling sadly. The three girls laughed to her comment.

"Ironic huh, us sending her pictures instead of her taking them and sending them to us?" Mia said shaking her head. "I have to go find Eddie and you need to go find Adrian, Syd. We will give you some time alone and smile, you're getting married, and Rose would want you to be happy." She said, touching Lissa's arm comfortingly.

Lissa looked at her and smiled showing her what she wanted. Sydney gave her a hug after Mia and told her that she looked beautiful. My head was only sticking in and their backs were to me so they couldn't see me but when they turned around and ran a sprinted as best I could in heels to hide behind a big bush in the hallway.

Thankfully, they walked the other way and I watched them disappear around a corner before stepping out and walking back to Lissa's room. She was still standing in front of the mirror looking out so I walked up behind her.

"It's your wedding, why aren't you smiling?" I whispered smirking.

"I miss Rose…wait-"she must have realized what was going on because she turned around quickly and her hands snapped to her mouth in shock, "Rose?"

"Come here Liss," I replied, holding my arms out for her. She sprinted to me quickly and I could feel her chest heaving with tears and laughter.

"Oh my god, your actually here!" She exclaimed pulling back to look at me. Her eyes roamed over the dress and looked surprised. "How did…"

"My parents are good at keeping secrets and stealing…" I remarked smirking again, "now stop crying, you will mess your makeup up."

Quickly, she dabbed at her eyes like I did, but they must have used waterproof makeup like mine was because her face was just as beautiful as it was 30 seconds ago.

"How are you here?" She asked, resulting in giggles just like I was, I was so happy to her again.

"Doc marked me as fully recovered, I'm healed now." I whispered smiling a true smile. She looked me deep in the eyes for a long second before hugging me.

"Congrats Rose, I'm so proud of you!" She whispered, before hesitantly adding, "so the memories…"

"Don't hurt me anymore, they are a part of who I am, and I'm not afraid of them anymore. I'm pain free and I am truly happy Liss, I'm finally me again and nothing is keeping me down ever again." I told her smiling proudly.

"I'm so happy for you Rose; you are the strongest person I ever know." She said, gripping my arms. I laughed and stepped back, taking the chance to look her over.

Her white dress flowed around her figure, flowing out about inches from her waist to her ankles. The top was strapless and in a V-neck with gems adorning the edges. A white bow wrapped around her waist and hung behind her stylishly.

Her hair was crimped and a braid was coming from each side of her head and came together in the back attached by a white bow. Her skin was waxed and she was literally glowing.

"You look beautiful Liss," I told her smiling. She blushed and looked down at the floor sighing.

"I'm so glad you're here Rose, I couldn't have done this without you," she smiled softly and then anxiousness crossed her expression. "Oh my gosh, I have to tell the orchestra that lengthen the march so you can walk and-"

"And it's already taken care of," I interrupted shaking my head. "Breathe Lissa, everything is taken care of, all you have to do is walk up and marry sparky and kiss him with all the love you have in the world." I smiled at her and saw her take a deep breath before nodding.

"I love him so much."

"I know you do," I replied, seeing the love sick expression she was holding.

"Does Dimitri," she trailed off raising her eyebrow.

"No, no one but you," I told her biting my lip as I thought about all of them seeing me when I walked in. She smiled and held my hand.

"They will be so happy to see you," she said.

"I am so happy to be back and see them too." We smiled at each other, relaxing and enjoying being around each other until my dad walked in.

"Come on girls, its time."

Lissa's face turned nervous and I squeezed her hand to tell her that I'm here. She smiled and breathed out, both of us following my dad out of the room. We didn't turn the corner however, because the groomsmen and bridesmaid-aka my friends- were standing there.

My dad walked around and told them to continue on and we would follow. I heard the music start and our friends voices grew excited as they started walking in front of us.

"Okay, the best man would have been walking you out, which would have been Dimitri, but since we didn't know you were coming, you are just going to walk out by yourself okay?" She asked smiling. I nodded my head and peeked around the corner to see Adrian and Sydney start walking.

We walked over to the door and I grinned at Lissa. "Go get em' Liss." She smiled and nodded before I heard the music change, no one could see me where I was, but I could see everyone standing up waiting for who they thought was Lissa walking down.

I took the first steps out and started walking out with the flowers that my dad had given me on the way over. I could feel the shock resonating around me and I looked around at everyone, throwing my man-eater smile at a few before my gaze redirected in front of me.

Christian was smiling where he was standing, possibly even wider but the person that caught my eye was the gorgeous man standing beside him.

Dimitri hadn't change at all, and we met each other's eyes at the same time, and I could feel the same love radiate through both of us. Nothing has changed about that either.

Once I got to the end of the aisle, I took my spot by Sydney and smiled at them. Mia grinned and Sydney grabbed my hand. I turned my attention to the guys and Adrian was beaming at me, along with Eddie. Dimitri was staring at me longingly and still with surprise in his eyes.

We all turned our eyes around when Lissa started walking. She was grinning, her eyes stuck on Christian, as his eyes were glued to her. I smiled as I felt my heart almost burst from its seam from happiness. I was home.

The ceremony was amazing, and soon she and Christian were walking back down the aisle together. I realized that this meant I was going to walk back with Dimitri. We walked towards each other and he held his hand out which I took and he squeezed it before escorting me down the aisle silently.

Once we were in the main area again, Lissa and Christian were kissing but pulled back to look as we walked in. Walking with Dimitri, I hugged Christian and Lissa.

"Congratulations Liss, Sparky. Remember if you hurt her, I will cut off your balls." I threatened before smiling innocently. He just smirked and rustled my hair.

"I'm glad you could make it Rose, I just missed your snarky attitude." He replied before affectionately kissing my cheek. I laughed and finally turned to the man beside me, not knowing what to do.

I felt his hand trace my cheek, lifting my face up so I could look at him. His eyes melted into mine and I smiled before throwing myself around him and kissing him intensely. He responded instantly and held me to him like he couldn't let me go.

"I missed you so much; it was so painful not seeing you for 8 months." He whispered in my ear as we embraced. Tears started falling from my eyes as I hid my face in his neck.

"I missed you so much," I cried, biting my lip so I wouldn't sob. He held me to him longer before pulling back and kissing me some more. I heard laughter which made us pull away and look at the others gathered around us smiling.

Mia and Sydney both threw themselves at me and I let out an 'oomph' before tightly hugging them back. I started laughing as I felt everyone start hugging us making it a large group hug. When they all pulled away I was crying so hard that I looked like an insane person as I cried as laughed at the same time.

"I missed you guys so much! I couldn't stand not seeing all of you for 8 months," I said, pulling them into another hug. They were laughing as we pulled away again.

"How are you Rose?" Mia asked softly, smiling at me. I shook my head and made a zip-my-lips motion with my hand.

"Nope, we will talk about me later. Lissa, I believe you have another dress to change into for the reception?" I said, tapping my finger to my chin. She nodded, giving me an amused look. "Sorry Sparky but us girls are going to get Lissa changed and the guys will…try to make you look better." I muttered shooting him a snarky face before hiding behind Lissa as he tried swiping at me.

Everyone laughed at our banter and it felt good to be messing with him again.

I kissed Dimitri on the lips, not wanting to leave his arms after just seeing him but I knew I had the rest of my life to lie in his arms now. There was nothing holding me back from being with him.

"Wait Rose, we thought you would want this," my mom said, holding out my black camera. I stared at it for a second and I could tell everyone was waiting for my reaction.

I breathed out before a smile lit up my lips. I walked towards her and gently took the camera, the familiar metal smoothed against my hand and I hugged it to myself. "I missed you so much."

"I think you're making Dimitri jealous over there Rose," Adrian retorted laughing. Everyone followed while I just stuck my tongue out at him and pulled the camera up, taking a picture of my large extended family.

They shot me looked while I just grabbed Lissa, Mia, and Sydney and hi-tailed it out of there. When we were inside the room I told them to stand together and I took some pictures of my best friends before Mia took the camera and took pictures of Lissa and I and then we all took a group picture with the timer.

"Oh I missed this," I whispered smiling at them. They gave me a big smile before Mia went and grabbed Lissa's other dress.

"I haven't seen you like this is a long time," Lissa said once we had gotten her out of her wedding dress and into an orange knee- length dress with orange heels that had a white flower on them.

"The rehab was good for you," Sydney said smiling, but then she thought about her words as if she thought she sounded horrible but I held up my hand to stop her.

"It was good for me; it was cleansing the soul and bringing me back to my old self." I replied smiling as I thought about how different I was during the Dark Times, as Doc referred to them.

"I'm glad we got this Rose back," Mia said, walking towards the door. We got up and followed her.

"I was so messed up, I can't believe how deep I fell under," I murmured, giving them sad looks.

"It was understandable Rose," Sydney responded and the other two nodded their heads in affirmation. I sighed and shook my head before standing up and planting a smile on my face. I took my camera from Mia and flashed another picture of them.

"It doesn't matter now, I'm back now. Now let's focus on the rest of Lissa's big day." I stated smiling at her before walking out of the room, knowing they would follow me.

Once we returned to the main hall, Lissa rushed towards Christian, who had taken his suit jacket off and lost the tie so he was standing in a red-button up shirt and black slacks. They kissed each other fiercely and I rolled my eyes lovingly before walking towards Dimitri. His eyes were on me the entire time, so I wagged my hips a little more than usual and got the satisfaction of seeing him gulp.

"Hey Comrade," I whispered, pulling my arms around his neck. He shook his head at me, raising his eyebrow questioningly. "Didn't they use those terms in the RSSR?"

"First of all, it's USSR, and second you amuse me greatly Roza." I smiled at him brightly before pecking his lips. "I missed you," he whispered against my lips.

I smiled and kissed him chastely before whispering back, "I missed you even more."

He snorted, rolling his eyes, "I highly doubt that."

I pouted and shook my head stubbornly. Laughing he looped his arm around my waist and started walking me outside, following the others. As I walked outside, I gasped at the beautiful reception area that I hadn't seen when arriving here. A pond was in the background surrounded by beautiful wildflowers-the ones that I had picked out. In front was a large patio with a dj on the right and refreshments on the left. Chairs were set up around a large empty space that I only assumed was the dance floor.

The area was decorated beautifully and I couldn't help but marvel at for a bit longer before Dimitri was tugging my hand.

"It's so beautiful," I whispered, turning my head to look at Lissa. She smiled and nodded her head, gazing at it just like I was.

Everybody from inside were already outside and waiting for the bride and groom. I looked up at Dimitri and smiled before dragging along to the dj so I could introduce them.

"Can I borrow this?" I asked him, waiting for him to nod before I turned around and said into it, "Everyone, may I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Christian and Lissa Ozera!"

Everyone clapped as Lissa walked towards the reception with a large smile on her face. Usually, people would only say the guy's name, but I knew that Lissa needed to hear her new name too. She was surrounded by guests immediately so I pulled Dimitri towards some chairs and was about to sit down, until he stopped me and sat himself down, pulling me onto his lap.

"I need to have you closer than a chair away Roza. You have been away too long," he whispered, kissing my cheek. I smiled, leaning my head on his shoulder.

"What have you been doing since I've been gone?" I asked questioningly, really wanting to know the things he has done.

"I mostly stayed at your house, trying to keep a part of you with me at all times. I think I mostly waited for your letter or was busy writing mine to you," he admitted chuckling. I laughed before poking his rock-hard stomach.

"You've been working out too," I stated grinning. He nodded, biting his lip.

"It realized a lot of my stress," he replied, staring at the crowd of people. His expression worried me, like he was still stressing out on something important.

"Do you want to tell me what is bothering you?" I asked softly, touching his cheek. His eyes met mine; I could see the buried pain that he was trying to hide.

"I feel guilty," he said, running his hand through my hair.

"Why?" I asked confused.

"I just feel like, if I didn't leave your side for those 10 minutes, then that night wouldn't have ever happened." I brought my free hand to the other side of his face, pulling his so he was staring directly at me.

"Do not feel guilty for that Dimitri. You had to let me go, you couldn't follow me to the bathroom. It was just a random place that we didn't think of, and I told you to stay so don't feel guilty for listening." I stated, looking hard into his eyes.

"But-"

"No, let go of the past Dimitri. Look at me, right now, and tell me what you see." I said, watching him look deep into my eyes before roaming my body.

"I see a beautiful woman, who has taken on the devil and won. I see a person who broke through the rough and is standing before me victorious." He whispered hoarsely, running a hand down my face. I turned and kissed his palm before taking his hand in both of mine.

"You want to know what I see if I were to look at myself in the mirror?" I asked softly, looking down at our hands. When he didn't reply, I continued, "I see myself alive, breathing, _happy, _ecstatic, relieved, and standing in front of you wondering why you are worrying about the past me, when I am standing before you ready to look at the future, _our _future. I don't care about what happened in the past year; all I know is that it shaped me into the person I am standing before you now. Yes, I will _always_ remember what happened but I will not dwell on it. Who do you want to remember? The broken, pained girl who can't stand because she is too weak? Or the one standing in front of you now?"

I felt tears welling in my eyes and I blinked them back, but one managed to escape and fall down onto our hands. I felt his hand that I wasn't holding lift my chin so he could look at me. I stared at him, trying to convey the strength inside of me.

"The one right in front of me, because I know that she is ready and better than before. Because she won the battle and because I see myself lying beside you as we take our last breaths. I want to think about the future with you not the past. Your right," he whispered. I smiled and reached up so I could kiss him with all of the passion that I had in my body.

"You know," I started after we pulled away for air, "I think we need a new start. A new beginning," I said standing up.

"That sounds like a great idea," he replied, standing up too. I stuck out my hand, biting my lip.

"Hi, I'm Rosemarie Hathaway, but please call me Rose," I stated formally.

"Dimitri Belikov, it is very nice to meet you Rose." I grinned and he leaned forward, pecking me on the lips.

"Is that how you great everyone Mr. Belikov?" I asked amused, he laughed loudly, the sound booming across the area. I loved his laugh.

"No ma'am only the most mesmerizing, beautiful, intelligent, and extremely sexy ones." He said, waggling his eyebrows at me. It was my turn to laugh loudly and I leaned forward moving my lips towards his so that I was barely touching them.

"Well, I can't wait to learn more about you Dimitri," I whispered, my words fanning over his lips before pulling back and turning around, strutting away from him purposely. He growled, and I could feel him starting after me.

I squealed as I felt his arms wrapped around my waist and pick me up, turning me around quickly. I pretended to look at him innocently though I knew he could see through me easily.

"Tease," he murmured, kissing me hard on the lips. I smiled into the kiss, wrapping my arms around his neck. We both pulled back when we needed air and I rested my head on his chest.

"I love you Dimitri, forever," I breathed, closing my eyes. Music filled the air and Dimitri held me too him swaying back at forth.

"I love you too my Roza, forever. I promise that I will always be here to protect you, love you, and make you laugh so you will never be sad. I will always be here, by your side. You caught me, and I don't see myself loving anyone but you for the rest of my life," he whispered strongly in my ear. A tear trailed down my cheek, but I he couldn't see it. It was a happy tear though.

"I couldn't ask for anything else," I replied, moving so I could kiss him again. His lips moved softly against mine and all I could feel was the love between us. "I'm so grateful that you ended up on my doorstep, without you I wouldn't know what real love is."

He smiled, and then he lightened the air but smirking, "are you sure that's the reason your grateful? If I remember correctly, I saved you from falling of a ladder and getting a concussion or worse."

I hit his shoulder lightly and giggled, "Hmm maybe that's it."

We pulled back, and I noticed how darker everything looked. We had been in such a daydream that I didn't see the sun go down. Lights were literally floating on water behind us and were also shining in the trees. It looked even more magical.

We watched as Christian and Lissa walked to the dance floor for their first dance, smiling brightly at each other. I sighed, loving how happy everybody is. I'm so glad that I did the rehab, because now I could enjoy the warmth that ran through me at watching everyone I love be happy.

It was the greatest feeling in the world.

"Would you like the dance?" Dimitri asked after another song came on. I smiled and nodded, taking his hand as we walked towards the dance floor.

He spun me around before placing me in his arms where I close my eyes on his chest content. I felt myself drifting off to the music when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I looked up and some Adrian standing there smiling.

"May I cut in?" HE asked Dimitri, holding his hand out for me. Dimitri nodded, kissing my lips before handing me over to Adrian who turned me around in a circle before placing a hand on my hip and the other in my hand.

"I missed you Adrian," I said smiling. His eyes shone with happiness and he pulled me closer to hug me.

"I missed you too Little Photographer, and I'm so proud of you." He said, referring to my recovery. I smiled and nodded happily.

"I'm glad that I did it, because now I can enjoy my life again. I can experience things like a normal person as I watch my best friend get married to the love of her life. It's an amazing feeling." I breathed, staring at the lights and people.

"If you ever need anything, I will always be here for you," he said, kissing my cheek. I nodded just as the song ended. He bowed and kissed my hand.

"Thank you Adrian," I stated breathing out.

"Your welcome Rose, we have a lot of catching up to do. Where is that camera of yours anyway? I remember you always wore it around your neck." He stated confused.

"People change, I want to be in the memory instead of taking pictures of it now. I can't just hide behind it, because I will miss a lot of things. You never know what could happen to you, and I learned that the hard way." I said shaking my head.

He smiled, "you really have changed Rose, and I love it."

I laughed at his words and walked off, "me too!" I started turning around, but I saw something strange out of the corner of my eye.

A group of people were looking at me with shock and happiness over their features. I didn't know any of them, but they all seemed so familiar. I bit my lip as they kept staring before I felt someone behind me. I smelt his aftershave and immediately knew who it was.

"Dimitri, who are those people?" I asked him, looking up. He clucked his tongue as he realized who I was talking about and what they were currently doing.

"Come on, I'll introduce you to them," he said, grabbing my hand and taking me over to them. I felt slightly shy as he pulled me towards a woman who looked about 45 and she smiled brightly as Dimitri came over. Wait, I know those eyes…

"Mama, I would like to finally introduce you to the love of my life, Rose Hathaway." He stated smiling. I think I paled slightly as I realized what was happening. This was his _family. _

"Oh, it's so lovely to meet you Roza. I've heard so much about you," she said, leaving out the others parts. I smiled shyly, and held my hand out, but she shook her head and pulled me into a hug.

"I consider you family already Rose; please call me Olena or Mom." I grinned as she did, feeling like it was irresistible.

"It's so nice to meet you, Olena," _okay maybe it would feel too weird to call her mom right now, _I said in my head. She smiled as if it was no big thing and kissed my cheek.

Dimitri moved me over a little so he could introduce me to the next person. She looked a little older than Dimitri but younger than his mom.

"Hi, I'm Karolina," she introduced, shifting the baby she carried so she could also hug me. God I loved Dimitri's family already…

"Rose," I stated simply. She smiled and looked down to a little boy standing beside her. He looked up at me and smiled before holding his hand out.

"I'm Paul," he stated simply. I grinned and took his small hand in mine.

"Well hello Paul, I'm Rose," I said, bending over slightly. He blushed and slowly took a step behind his mother. I giggled and stood up only to be met with a very pregnant woman.

"Hi, I'm Sonya," she said, pulling me into a hug. I laughed at her enthusiasm and hugged her back. "It is so good to meet the girl that stole my little brother's heart, and I'm sorry about everything you have went through this past year…" she trailed off not knowing how to continue.

"You have nothing to apologize for, but that is all in the past. I'm a different person now," I told her smiling. She grinned in response and nodded her head.

"You're a strong girl," a hoarse voice said from behind her. Sonya moved to show an older lady that must be Dimitri's grandmother, she continued talking as I assessed her, "it would be hard for anyone else to go through the ordeal you have went through my dear, and it shows your strength. You will make a good addition to this family and wonderful girl for my grandson."

I smiled at her words and nodded.

"Thank you," I said holding my hand.

"Yeva Belikova," she said, grabbing my arm and pulling me into a hug also.

I smiled up at Dimitri, wanting to tell him how much I loved his family before someone else popped up in front of me.

"Hi! I'm Viktoria!" She exclaimed, hugging me tightly. I was slightly shocked by her enthusiasm but hugged her back quickly. "I'm Dimitri's little sister."

"My very annoying little sister," Dimitri muttered, snickering as Viktoria glared at him.

"Rose," I said, pulling her gaze away from Dimitri.

"I think me and you will get along so well! We are going to talk for a long time and we could even sleep over at each other's houses and-"Dimitri's hand slapped over her mouth.

"Viktoria, I think you're scaring her," he said, looking at me worriedly in a joking way. I hit his arm so he would let go of her mouth and shook my head at him.

"Oh stop it Dimitri," I chastised him before turning back to Viktoria, "that sounds good though Viktoria."

She smiled and nodded before Dimitri wrapped an arm around my shoulders and started pulling me away from them. "It was nice meeting you!" I yelled before we got too far away.

"Don't worry Roza; you will see a lot of them in the next few days." He said smiling, and I hit his shoulder again and glared. "What?"

"Next time warn me _before_ I meet your family! "I exclaimed shaking my head. He chuckled at me before kissing my lips once.

"I'm sorry Roza, but you had no reason to be nervous, they love you." I nodded, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards our friends.

"I'm happy because I absolutely love them," I said truthfully, grinning up at him. He smiled happily and kissed my forehead.

The rest of the night, I had danced with Dimitri, Eddie, Adrian-again-, and even Christian. When fast songs came on, I danced with my girls, and then one song, I danced with my dad.

Lissa and Christian cut the cake early when I told them that I wanted some and then they did the bouquet toss and garner toss. Lissa blushed bad when Christian removed her garner and when he shot it; it landed right in Adrian's hands. He smiled mysteriously at Sydney who shook her head with a smile on her face.

However, when the bouquet toss started, Mia made me stand beside her and Sydney and Lissa tossed it, letting it land right in my hands. Mia squealed and looked at Dimitri while I blushed profoundly.

"You know Roza, it's not that bad. I already know that I'm going to be with you the rest of your life." He said smiling. I nodded my head, wrapping my arm around his waist as his arm wrapped around my shoulders.

The party was already winding down, so we were currently walking around the lit pond, enjoying the peace and beautiful light around us. I could probably fall asleep right here in his arms if I could.

As we walked, I couldn't help but think about the troubles I had to go through to get to this point in time is. I thought about Aunt Alberta and all the memories I had of her and I together. I remembered the things I did when she died, when I was scared of being alone.

That was before I met Mason in school and when he told me he wanted to join the army. We were the best of friends and I was saddened again as I realized he was leaving too.

And then Lissa comes in, instantly clicking with me. We became best friends fast, and I remembered how she found out my love of photography, telling me about her Uncle's magazine company. I looked back on her meeting Christian and how terrible I thought her choice was at first. I was completely wrong.

I finally thought about my kidnapping. It was hard memories, the dark times, but as I looked over them, remembering what happened to me, I breathed a sigh of relief and pushed them away locking them up. They wouldn't hurt me anymore.

Being me again, was a blessing. I couldn't help but think about not living in this moment as I would have a year ago. I missed myself, which is hard to say, but I guess it was more like, I found myself again. She was just building back up, getting stronger and stronger, waiting for the right moment to live again and breathe.

I also let my mind trail to my camera. I would never let photography go; it was also a part of me, something I missed dearly. I thought about why I had been so consumed in my camera, why I never would put it down for a second and join in with it. I thought about it multiple times when I was with Olendski but I think I knew my reason now.

I always wanted to keep the good things with me; it was a habit I picked up after Aunt Alberta died. I never wanted to miss a moment of my life, wanted to keep it close, but now I know that it isn't healthy. I need to live it, not save it. Of course, I will always be a photographer, but standing here with Dimitri, I knew there was another option in life, one that doesn't require me to stand behind the camera…or well, at least not all the time.

I know that I, forever, have a life filled with love and happiness, and that Nathan can't just stop me from living my life. This is a new beginning, and I was ready to begin my new journey, cherishing the old memories, and making new ones.

Pain is only temporary, because pain can't beat love. The darkness can't beat the light. The evil can't beat the good.

It was always there, and I was going to always remember it.

As I walked with Dimitri beside the water, and watched my friends dance and laugh in the distance, I heard a rustling in a nearby tree. Looking up, I was quick to see the red wings fly around us once before swooping into the sky, disappearing in the shadows.

The cardinal didn't bring bad this time though, it brought life and meaning.

Dimitri smiled at me and leaned down, kissing me as he could realize what I was thinking about. _Man,_ I thought, _I love this guy._ And we stood there, kissing under the moonlight; I couldn't help but feel new and ready to take on anything.

I mean, you only live one, so I'm not staying behind the camera; I'm staying wrapped up in the never-ending lines of friendship, family, and love, letting it keep me happy and warm for the rest of my life.

THE END

**Dang it was hard to write those two words but it had to be done. OF course, for those of you that are wondering, I will be writing an epilogue, but there will be no sequel. I'm sorry but, I've said as much as I could say about this story and I'm happy about how it turned out.**

**Please stay tuned and I will get the epilogue out soon!**

**Thanks,**

**0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0**


	36. Chapter 36

**Loved the reviews and your reponse on how I ended the story! I'm so sad to hit the complete button and quite frankly I dont want to. I really hope you like the epilogue and I'm so happy to have wrote this story. Please ENJOY!**

**EPILOGUE**

"Bethany Andrea Belikov and Liam Mason Belikov, get down here, right now!" I exclaimed, waiting to hear their little feet running down the stairs. I was very frustrated as I stared at the vase shattered all over the floor.

They walked in. their heads bowed in shame, and their faces distraught as they waited for me to start ranting at them. I sighed, holding my hand up to my forehead in exasperation. Where was Dimitri when I needed him?

"Yes Mama?" They replied together, their voices trembling. I didn't like it when they were upset because my resolve would crumble in a mere seconds.

"Does one of you want to tell me how this happened?" I asked slowly, pointing at the vase. Both their eyes flickered to the vase before looking down at their feet again.

"I ran into the table when we were playing tag and it fell," Liam said quietly, as if his words were going to get him sent to jail.

"What did I tell you too about playing tag inside the house?" I asked, crossing my arms. They both bit their lips, a trait they acquired from me.

"Not to," they mumbled.

"That's right," I said sternly, staring at them. Bethany's bottom lip started to tremble and I could faintly hear Liam sniffle as if he was crying. Upon seeing my children's upset faces, my will caved in and bent to my knees so I could be their height. "I'm not mad," I whispered, pulling both of their chins up with my fingers.

"You're not?" Bethany asked, her voice shaking. Liam looked at me in the same way as his sister, secretly hoping that they weren't in trouble.

"No, I'm not. But I am upset that you didn't tell me about this sooner, one of could have been hurt by the glass. You have to be more careful inside of the house. When your father gets home you are going to have to apologize to him because he had that vase for a very long time." I told them, my eyes flickering back and forth between the two of them.

"Yes ma'am," they whispered, again in tune with the other.

"I'm really sorry Mommy," Liam stated sadly, looking up at me with his bottom lip stuck out and his eyes watering.

"Me too," Bethany confirmed, the same expression on her features. Their heartbroken features were enough to break me out of tough mother mode and into loving mother who never wanted her babies to be hurt or sad.

"Oh, come here," I said, opening my arms. They both catapulted into me, wrapping their arms around my waist tightly, "its fine. Mommy isn't mad; I'm just scared that one of you could have gotten hurt." I said, clutching them tighter to me.

"Sorry Mama," they replied sadly. I pulled back and wiped the tears off of both of their faces.

"It's okay, but I want both of you to go to your room until I call you down for dinner." I said, kissing both of their foreheads. They nodded and scurried up the stairs quickly. I got up, walking towards the broom closet and grabbing it before heading back towards the living room right when Dimitri walked in the front door.

"What happened?" He asked surprised, looking at the mess. I started sweeping the mess, but he quickly took the broom from me, "let me."

"Our two kids decided to play tag, and Liam knocked it over." I said, leaning against the wall as I watched him clean it.

"You let them go easy again, didn't you?" He said, looking up at me with a small smile. I returned it shrugging my shoulders slightly. "They have you wrapped around their little fingers."

I laughed, tapping on his shoulder, "I wouldn't be talking mister."

"Your right," he agreed, kissing my lips shortly. I pouted as he pulled away, and pulled him down again, planting a more passionate kiss on his lips.

"Mmm, I missed you," I whispered against his lips.

He smiled and pecked me again, "I missed you more."

"I find that highly doubtful." I stated, smirking. He chuckled, picking up the vase remains and carrying it to kitchen to throw away. "You do remember that everyone is coming to dinner tonight." I said, raising my eyebrows.

"Yes Milaya, I remember," he responded, putting the broom away. I smiled at the nickname, loving that after 8 years, we are still as in love as we were when we first met. "What are you thinking about?" He asked, stopping in front of me.

"I'm just remembering the past, more specifically the time we first met." I said, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"I had already fallen in love with you," he whispered smiling.

"Me too…literally," I said, grinning. He laughed at the memory shaking his head.

"I can't believe it has been 8 years," I said, leaning my head on his chest. He made a sound of content in his throat and rested his head on mine.

"Time goes by fast," he replied simply.

"How did we get so lucky? We have a beautiful house by the ocean, two beautiful children, and love that will last a lifetime, and friends and family that would do anything for us." I breathed smiling.

"I don't know, but I'm glad that I met you. I love you Roza," he whispered, pulling my face up so he could kiss my lips.

I heard two giggles behind me, and shook my head, "I thought I told you two to stay in your room?"

"We wanted to do what you said-"

"But I required us to leave our rooms-"

"So we decided that this seemed like a bigger thing to do than stay in our rooms." Bethany concluded, both of them finishing the others sentence.

I raised my eyebrows, putting a hand on my hip, "And what, may I ask, did I tell you two to do that made void the fact that I also told you to stay in your rooms?"

Their eyes flickered to Dimitri and I knew what they wanted to do. Smiling, I stepped away from Dimitri, who looked at them and me confused.

They ran at him, each latching onto one leg as they looked up at him with puppy dog eyes. I snickered as I saw his control start to break at the looks on their faces.

"Daddy I'm sorry for breaking you vase!" Liam exclaimed, pouting out his lip. _I taught that boy well. _

"And I'm sorry for making Liam play tag with me!" Bethany started, adding the effect of watery eyes to her pout. _Oh poor Dimitri…_

"Its fine you guys, I'm not mad at you, just try not to do it again, okay?" He said, looking down at them. They nodded their heads fiercely, eyes wide. Dimitri then leaned down and picked both of them up, throwing them over his shoulders.

"Daddy!" They squealed, hitting his back. I laughed at the sight, hurriedly grabbing my camera from where it was charging behind me and snapping a picture.

"Mommy help!" Bethany yelled, begging me with her eyes. I smiled and looked at Dimitri purposely. He sighed and set Bethany down, allowing her to run towards me.

"Wait what about me?" Liam yelled; also giving me a wide-eyed looked. I giggled and shook my head. "Mama!"

"Let him down Uncle Dimi!" None other than Eric Ozera yelled, running into the room and banging on his legs. I was less surprised as I saw Lissa and Christian follow behind him laughing.

Before Eric saw it coming, he was also lifted over his shoulder. Both Lissa and I were laughing as the boys played around, Christian trying to save his son, and Dimitri trying to get away. Once they got tired out, Dimitri let them both down and watched as they ran out of the room, Bethany following.

"Hey Rose, Dimitri, thanks for inviting us for dinner," Lissa said, giving me a hug. I smiled kissing her cheek as I pulled back. I walked over to Christian, slapping the back of his head before also hugging him and moving away.

"What was that for?" He whined, rubbing his head.

"Just felt like it," I stated blandly, smirking.

"Well I feel like-"

"Christian, stop," Lissa said exasperated, giving her husband a look.

"She started it!" He exclaimed, pointing his finger at me.

"You sound like Eric, Chris, are you sure you don't have the brain of a five year old?" I asked, smirking. He lunged at me, but I hide behind Dimitri, sticking my tongue out at him from underneath Dimitri's arm.

Christian gave one look at Dimitri before glaring at me. I giggled and wrapped my arms around Dimitri's back, snuggling into him.

"How about I help you start dinner Rose while the guys go somewhere else and talk," Lissa said, grabbing my arm and tugging me away from Dimitri. I pouted as her as she shooed them out of the room.

"So, how have you been Liss?" I asked, getting the ingredients for spaghetti out of the cupboards. She shrugged, grabbing a bowl.

"I've been good, Eric is starting to act like Chris more and more every day," she sighed smiling.

"Sounds like a big problem," I stated smirking.

"Rose!" She laughed, smacking me on the arm.

"Don't worry, he has the snarky attitude of him, but he has the innocence of an angel. I bet he hasn't been in trouble once." I said, glancing over at her.

"I know," she smiled.

We continued talking about the kids while we fixed up dinner, and Mia and Sydney walked in about half an hour later, also willing to work. I hesitated on letting Sydney help, being as she was 7 months pregnant with Adrian's child.

"Rose, I'm fine!" She exclaimed, swatting my hands away. I held my hands up in surrender before continuing what I was doing and letting her help.

Adrian has changed ever since he asked Sydney to marry him, and he became even more loving when he realized Sydney was pregnant with their first child. He was so happy that all he would do was kiss Sydney and her stomach repeatedly.

Eddie and Mia had already been busy and had their second child four months ago. Mia said Eddie was holding her in the living room while she helped in here. Her name was Elizabeth Marie Castile, and there 4 years old daughter was named Jessica Louise Castile. They were the most adorable children in the whole world, though they couldn't beat my own children.

It was strange how quickly our group expanded and came together over the 8 year period. Each of us were married and had or was expecting kids. I was lucky for having twins, one boy and one girl, but what I haven't told Dimitri yet…was that I was 5 weeks pregnant.

I had brought everyone together so I could tell them at the same time. I knew Dimitri was happy, because he wanted a big family just like the one he was raised into and I loved being a mom so much that having another one sounded perfect.

So all together, Lissa and Christian have been married for 8 years and had Eric a year later which made him 7 now. Two years after Liss got married, Dimitri and I did, and I was 4 months pregnant with the twins at the time so they are both 5, going to be 6 next month.

Mia and Eddie got married 9 months after us and Mia got pregnant during the honeymoon and had their 4 year daughter Jessica 9 months later. She was pregnant during Adrian and Sydney's wedding. Adrian and Sydney have been married for 3 years and are expecting their baby in two months.

It was almost like a crazy house. Jessica was best friends with Bethany, and Eric was best friends with Liam. They all stayed close together and I took pictures of them at every possible moment in time.

They were also very protective of Elizabeth; they all loved her like a little sister.

It had been a great and crazy 8 years I must say. But I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I loved my large extended family and was grateful that I had them. They had been with me through my dark times, and never treated me any different since then.

I had finally moved on with my life and everything was right in the world. I was living a happy life and couldn't ask for anything more.

I still kept in contact with John, Doreene, and my boys. I visited them every couple of months with Dimitri and the kids, and both Bethany and Liam fell in love with their other Uncles. Jeremiah had found a girl and they were happily married at 27. Her name was Kristen Harper, and she was a beauty with blonde hair and bright green eyes.

Lucas and Eliza had finally gotten married and had a 6 year old boy named Joshua. He was very energetic and played with his 'cousins' the whole time we would visit.

Blane, surprisingly, manned up and married a girl named Angel. I was surprised that he could find somebody so down to earth and innocent that he had to mature. He loved her a lot.

I have also reconnected with my parents, and they absolutely loved Bethany and Liam. They spoiled their grandchildren greatly and it was hard to separate them at times.

Dimitri's family would either visit us from Russia, or we would go up and visit them. Russia was beautiful and it felt good to be in Dimitri's home town. He showed me the shop that he owned and introduced me to some of the students he taught.

He didn't keep the shop; however, we stayed in America where he now owned a public studio where he taught people self-defense and skills.

I didn't return back to Spirit Magazine, I left it behind in my old life, and now I am a photographer on the side, getting money when asked to take pictures at weddings or birthday parties. It felt like the perfect job.

Artur, Lev, and Denis still modeled and also visited us often. I must say, my children had a lot of uncles who spoiled them and a lot of aunts that did the same. It was the kind of life that I wish I would have had when I was little, and I was happy that my children got to experience such happiness.

I felt hands slide up my arms, rubbing up and down as a warm kiss was planted on my neck. I giggled, popping out of my thoughts as I looked up at Dimitri.

"What were you thinking about so hard?" He asked, pulling me into his chest.

"Everything, you, me, our friends, our _life_," I whispered smiling. He chuckled and nodded, pushing a strand of hair back.

"We did pretty dang good didn't we?" HE asked smirking. I giggled and kissed his cheek.

"We sure did."

"So," I said over the extremely loud table, making everyone be quiet, "there was a reason that I asked for all of you to be here today."

Dimitri looked up at me smiling, knowing I had something to say. I smiled back at him, grabbing his hand but also looking over to Bethany and Liam who were looking at me with little smiles on their faces.

"I'm pregnant," I said grinning.

All of the girls started screaming and congratulating me and Dimitri lifted me and spun me around before kissing me fiercely. "God, Roza that is amazing."

"I know we are going to have another little one running around pretty soon." I whispered, kissing his lips again. I felt two pairs of arms wrap around my legs and kneeled down to their level.

"So are we going to have a little brother or sister?" They asked together, I nodded my head and they squealed hugging me.

"Great now there are two pregnant women," Christian groaned before flinching as Sydney and I hit him in the back of the head.

"This is perfect," Lissa whispered smiling. I beamed back, looking around at my family before meeting Dimitri's eyes again.

"It sure is," I agreed.

**And there you have it, please review and tell me what you have completely thought of the story I can't wait to hear from you! For the last time, thank you for sticking with me and Behind the Camera. We are both happy you enjoyed it!**

**0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0 Signing off-**


	37. New Story!

**Hi Everyone! I just wanted you to know that I decided to write a Harry Potter Fanfic! My first one and I wanted to see if there are any takers to my idea! So if you are Harry Potter Fanfictioners-or if your not-than I would love it if you would stop by and take a look at it! It's called False Security.**

**Summary:**

**Harry Potter made a mistake during the final battle. He never went into the forbidden forest, he never knew he was a horocrux, and he never knew that killing Voldemort would only push his spirit out of his body once more. Now Harry is the only one tying Voldemort to immortality so he must portray himself dead to the wizarding world and run away to protect them from Voldemort's unexpected return. The only person who could help save Harry is the man that has nothing and everything to lose. Percy Weasley.**

**Please check it out and tell me what you think!**

**(Also, Vampire Academy came out today in theaters so I am very excited to see it. Anyone else?)**

**0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0**


End file.
